SOLE Anonymous Question Box by SOLE Program

where can I get condoms?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-04 21:51:00 UTC

Free condoms:

From us - Native American Community Services (@nacs_sole on IG)

Doctors offices (and sometimes your school nurse!)

Planned Parenthood

Evergreen Health

GLYS

The Pride Center

Family Help Center @ 60 Dingens St

Where to buy condoms:

Grocery stores (Tops, Wegmans, Walmart, Target)

Some corner stores and gas stations

Pharmacies (CVS, Walgreens)

Online (Amazon, Target, Walmart)

Brand websites (Durex, Trojan, Lifestyle)

what is HIV?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-04 21:53:19 UTC

Human Immunodeficiency Virus-

A virus that attacks a person's immune system and weakens it over time. It can eventually turn into AIDS if left untreated, but if someone gets medical care it's very manageable.

where can I get tested?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 20:46:40 UTC

Check out the Resource tab on the left for info on where to get tested in Erie, Niagara, and Monroe counties!

what's the most common sti?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 20:47:22 UTC

Some of the most common STIs in the nation are HPV (Human Papilloma Virus), Herpes, and Chlamydia

how many stis are there?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 20:50:12 UTC

Chlamydia, Gonorrhea, and Syphilis (curable, harmful if left untreated for long periods)

Herpes, Hepatitis, HIV, HPV/genital warts (no cure, but treatments available)

Crabs, Scabies, Trichomoniasis (curable)

what if I want to date someone but I don't want to have sex?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 20:55:56 UTC

That's completely up to you! Some people will feel ready for sex way before others, while some people might not care about sex at all. In a healthy relationship, both partners should decide on their own if they want to have sex, and then talk about it together. It's important to respect your partner's boundaries and not pressure them before they're ready

how is HIV treated?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:04:28 UTC

Anti Retroviral Treatments (ART) are medications that treat HIV. They lower the amount of HIV in the body, which reduces the risk of HIV being passed on or further weakening the immune system

Our Program Offerings

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:06:11 UTC

Resources in Erie County

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:06:31 UTC

Resources in Niagara County

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:07:49 UTC

Resources in Rochester

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:08:20 UTC

can someone get pregnant if they have sex during their period?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:10:39 UTC

It is not common, but it can happen. Sperm can live in the body for about 5 days. If someone with a uterus has sex while on their period and then another egg is released from the ovaries (ovulation) within a few days after, it is possible that a pregnancy could occur. Consider birth control or condoms to reduce that risk!

how do abortions work?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:10:49 UTC

A pregnancy can be ended either with medication (1-2 pills that someone can take at home), or through an in-clinic procedure that typically only takes about 10 minutes. Both of these options are very common and safe; abortions are actually one of the safest medical procedures out there, safer than giving birth or getting your wisdom teeth out. The method a person chooses might depend on how far into their pregnancy they are, where they'd like to be during the process, or other factors like cost and access to services. Click the link for more info about abortions!

what type of birth control works best?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:12:15 UTC

The Implant and IUD are some of the most effective methods of birth control- they're both about 99% effective, and once they are placed by a doctor they can stay in place for 3-10 years. The Shot is about 96% effective, and the Ring, Patch, and Pill are about 93% effective. All of these percentages can vary depending on if they are used correctly and consistently, and how your body reacts to them. If you're looking for an effective method that works for you you can talk to your doctor! Planned Parenthood also has great information on each method- click the link to learn more.

can I get birth control without my parents knowing?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:12:52 UTC

You may be able to! In New York State people under the age of 17 are covered by Minor's Rights, which means you can access reproductive health services without a parent knowing as long as your doctor thinks you can fully understand the services. Your parents may see a bill from the clinic in the mail if you use their insurance, however, but if you ask for 'discreet billing' your doctor's office will make sure the bill doesn't state what services you received. Many clinics also have programs to help young people pay for their reproductive health care so they don't have to use their parent's insurance. Check out the Resources section for more information about where you can access services!

does sex hurt?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:13:36 UTC

Sex should not hurt! It should be fun and enjoyable for everyone involved. Sometimes people may experience pain or discomfort if they're rushing, not using enough lubricant, not communicating about what does and doesn't feel good, or if a person has an underlying condition that causes pain during sex. It's super important to start slow, and talk about how you're feeling with your partner

what happens when you lose your virginity?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:17:44 UTC

Nothing, really! There is not one big change that happens once someone has sex for the first time. Plus, everyone has different ideas of what counts as 'losing your virginity;' some people think it happens the first time you have vaginal sex, while for others it could mean oral or anal sex. You might feel different emotionally after having sex, but physically there will not be any specific change. Sometimes a female's hymen (a flap of skin near the vagina) will tear, but this definitely doesn't happen for everyone

what do I do if my boyfriend doesn't want to use a condom?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:18:21 UTC

If you and your partner have different preferences when it comes to using condoms, it might be time to have a discussion about your preferences and options. You might want to have this talk outside of the bedroom instead of right before sex. You can talk to them about what you're comfortable with, why you want to use condoms, how they help to keep you safe, etc. We recommend answering these questions by yourself first, so you know what you want without any pressure. Some partners may try to convince you to change your mind, so it's important that you make your own decision first. If someone refuses to compromise it is up to you if you want to keep negotiating, try to educate them, or even walk away from that person/relationship. Your health comes first, so try to prioritize your own safety and comfort.

what part of puberty happens first?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:19:40 UTC

It depends on each individual, but often people will start seeing pubic hair around the genitals as they enter puberty.

what does it mean to be intersex?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:23:23 UTC

When a baby is born, the doctor who delivers them will look at their anatomy and label them as either male, female, or intersex. An intersex person will have some combination of male and female traits and characteristics; there are over 30 different combinations. Click the link for more info!

Pride Flags

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-07 21:31:04 UTC

These are the Pride flags of some common LGBTQIA+ identities, but there are plenty more ways to identify that are not included here!

what is the age of consent?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-10 16:11:31 UTC

This is the age at which a person can legally say 'yes' to having sex. In New York State the age of consent is 17 years old. Each U.S. state sets an age limit, in order to protect young people who may not fully understand the risks associated with sex, or who may not be able to safely make that decision for themselves yet. If someone younger than 17 has sex with an adult, there is always a chance that the adult could be charged with sexual misconduct or statuatory rape.

what is the difference between sex and gender?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-10 19:43:29 UTC

Sex, or sex assigned at birth, refers to someone's biological body parts that they are born with. They may be male, female, or intersex

Gender refers to how someone sees themself, or how they identify. Someone may feel like a boy/man, a girl/woman, transgender, nonbinary, genderfluid, agender, Two Spirit, etc.

how old do you have to be to get birth control?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-13 18:39:55 UTC

In New York State, you can access birth control (even without your parent's permission) at any age with the capacity to consent- this means that as long as your doctor knows that you are able to understand what birth control is, how it works, and how to use it correctly, they can approve you to use birth control. Talk to your provider about how you can access birth control, or check out our Resources tab to locate clinics where you can talk to a professional and get a prescription.

is there a medicine that prevents HIV?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-13 18:51:49 UTC

PEP and PrEP can prevent HIV before someone is infected by blocking the virus from attaching to white blood cells.

Someone may take PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis), a once-daily pill, if they are at a high risk for getting HIV. If someone has a partner who is HIV+, if they have multiple partners, or if they often use needles, they may want to consider PrEP to prevent HIV.

PEP (post-exposure prophylaxis) can be taken after someone engaged in a risky behavior, or may have been exposed to HIV. Medical professionals may take this after being exposed to bodily fluids, or someone might use PEP after having unprotected sex, after a sexual assault, or after using a needle that may have already been used

how do people get HIV?

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-13 19:10:45 UTC

HIV is passed from person to person through 5 bodily fluids: blood, semen, vaginal fluids, rectal fluids, and breast milk. This typically happens during anal, oral, or vaginal sex, when someone uses a needle that someone else has already used, or to pregnant person to child during pregnancy, childbirth, or when breastfeeding

if i go to planned parenthood will my mom know

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-20 16:34:19 UTC

Not necessarily! Minors (people under the age of 18) are able to access reproductive healthcare without their parents' consent or permission in New York State. The only way a parent/guardian could potentially find out if you went to Planned Parenthood - or accessed reproductive healthcare at a sexual health clinic - is through the insurance billing process. Most minors are on their parents/guardians' health insurance, and the health insurance agency would send a bill to your house which would disclose that you received services. In this case, you could ask the clinic for something called "discreet billing" which would hide which specific services were accessed. Another option is that most sexual health clinics (including Planned Parenthood) have a "Family Planning Benefit Program" which reduces or entirely covers the cost of most services that a person would access at the clinic. Check out our resource guide for more information on this! It's linked under "Resources".

what does nonbinary mean

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-20 16:46:16 UTC

A nonbinary person is someone who does not identify with the label of either "male" or "female", "boy" or "girl", "man" or "woman". Some nonbinary people identify as being both a man and a woman, some fall somewhere in between, some fall completely outside of these categories. Nonbinary can also be used as an umbrella term to encompass other gender identities such as agender, genderfluid, bigender, genderqueer, etc. Everyone experiences gender in their own personal way, so not all nonbinary people will feel like the same gender! Nonbinary people can also use whatever pronouns they feel comfortable with, which are not always they/them.

what age will i hit puberty

NACSSOLE — 2025-11-20 17:13:47 UTC

Everyone begins puberty at a different age. Some people start puberty earlier than others, and some start later than others. Typically, people with male anatomy begin puberty anywhere between 9-14 years old, and people with female anatomy begin puberty between 8-13 years old. Some people go through the physical changes of puberty before the mental/emotional/social changes, or vice versa. Puberty is also not something that happens overnight. It takes years for all of these changes to happen, and they happen very gradually. Most people don't even notice when they have started puberty. The age a person starts going through puberty typically depends on environmental factors, genetic makeup, and family history. You could always talk to your doctor or a trusted adult if you're curious!

where can I get free tampons

NACSSOLE — 2025-12-01 17:42:00 UTC

We offer free pads, tampons, liners, and other hygiene products here at NACS- we can even deliver them to you, all for free. DM us on Instagram or Facebook if you need to set up a pickup or delivery! You can also access free period products through the Erie County Alliance for Period Supplies. You may also be able to access free period products at local food banks, schools, and clinics. If you need help checking for availability of products let us know! https://www.eriecountyallianceforperiodsupplies.org/

what if condoms don't fit

NACSSOLE — 2025-12-22 21:40:47 UTC

Condoms are made to be thin, durable, and stretchy. They do come in different sizes (Trojan Magnums and Lifestyle Kyngs are slightly larger than standard), however the standard size should fit pretty much anyone. The brand One makes condoms in a range of sizes- they can be ordered online if you think you need them.

how do you figure out your sexuality?

NACSSOLE — 2025-12-23 20:19:05 UTC

Figuring out who you're sexually or romantically attracted to can be a long, confusing process! For some people it's simple and they feel more interested in a particular gender from a young age. Some people don't feel attraction at all, or might not notice it until they're a little older. No one can tell you what your sexuality is, it's up to you to decide. And it can change over time, so don't rush! You don't have to label yourself if you don't feel like any certain term fits you. If you're trying to figure out how you identify it can be helpful to do some research on different identities, talk to friends or people you trust, try out different labels and see what feels right, or listen to the lived experiences of queer people.

will using two condoms at once be safer?

NACSSOLE — 2025-12-23 20:26:49 UTC

Nope, condoms are designed to be used one at a time. Using two can actually make sex less safe, because the condoms will rub against each other and break. Only use one barrier for each sex act!

how do I get rid of acne

NACSSOLE — 2026-03-23 20:35:07 UTC

It's super normal to start experiencing acne during puberty, and for some people it continues through adulthood. Your skin starts producing excess oils, which can also be impacted by your body's hormones. If you want to help your skin stay healthy and reduce breakouts, try washing your face every day. Some people start their day by washing their face, or they wash their face before bed to clean away any oil, bacteria, and products that build up during the day. You can wash your face twice per day if needed! Try using a simple cleanser that doesn't have fragrances, such as CeraVe or Cetaphil. You can also try adding other products after washing your face; exfoliants and some serums can help keep your skin clear. In general, to prevent acne you should make sure to drink plenty of water, avoid touching your face, eat a balanced diet, and make sure to wash your pillowcase often.

should i be cleaning my vagina?

NACSSOLE — 2026-03-23 20:36:37 UTC

The inside of the vagina is self-cleaning, meaning it flushes out bacteria all on its own. Throughout the day the vagina will produce vaginal discharge, a clear or milky-colored fluid that will clear bacteria out of the vagina naturally. You never need to put soaps or washes inside the vagina; doing this can actually throw off the vagina's pH and upset the balance of good bacteria, leading to potential infections. However, you should be washing the vulva (the labia that surround the vagina). To do this you can use a mild soap on the external genitalia, avoiding inserting soap into the vagina. We recommend avoiding products marketed specifically for vaginal washing, such as Summer's Eve or Vagisil. You only need your regular soap to clean properly!

how do i know if i'm gay/queer

NACSSOLE — 2026-04-27 13:17:05 UTC

Finding out what your sexuality is can take a lot of self-exploration! Unfortunately there's no quiz that can tell you exactly who you are, and some people never decide on a label at all. A good starting point might be to research different sexualities and see if any resonate with you, and talk to safe people that might be able to share their own insights (friends, family, teachers, etc.). Some people know what their sexuality is from a young age, while others have to reflect on lived experiences to figure it out. Sexuality can also shift over time, so try not to put pressure on yourself to figure it all out right away!

what's the difference between an STD and an STI?

NACSSOLE — 2026-04-28 19:09:49 UTC

They are the same thing! STD stands for Sexually Transmitted Disease, and STI stands for Sexually Transmitted Infection. Many people are starting to use the term Infection instead of Disease, because it carries less stigma and is more accurate, since many STIs can be cured, while diseases cannot