My journal by F - Balderas, Aleja Wenyi A.

balderasalejawenyia — 2025-08-05 09:35:20 UTC

In my first cycle at UCC. At first I'm so afraid/scared. Why? Because I'm not an approachable person and I'm not good at making friends, I'm afraid I'll be disliked because I'm just a nobody. I don't know; maybe I'm so insecure and my confidence is so low. But after day 1, all the fear and nervousness disappeared. I just realized during a discussion on personal development that "I don't really know myself yet."lEven though I don't know how to express my feelings, I gained so much confidence to recite one of your questions. I just felt comfortable answering for the first time again. I rarely recite because I think they might judge my answer, and I'm very shy. Knowing oneself is very important to me now because you can't trust yourself because you really didn't completely know yourself, and also I'm in that era where I like to get to know myself better. I also learn the different defense mechanisms, and I'm shocked because I'm so in denial, and I always do repression because I'm afraid of what will happen when I open up things. There are parts of about me I'm still discovering. Today, I'm reminding myself that knowing who I am doesn't mean being perfect or having everything. It means being honest with myself. It means listening to my inner voice, especially when it's uncomfortable, and it means being brave enough to look at my flaws without shame and my strengths without arrogance. I'm looking forward to our next lesson, and I'm so very thankful for that warm discussion.

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balderasalejawenyia — 2025-08-05 09:43:30 UTC

‎2nd cycle was very fun I’m beginning to realize that education is more than just academics it's also about becoming a better version of myself. It's means growing not just mentally, but emotionally, socially, physically, and even spiritually. I have to balance my academics with extracurricular activities, managing stress, and build better relationships with my classmates and teachers. I have learned that intelligence is important, but also my character. Being responsible, and respectful are just as necessary as being smart. One thing that helped me grow was auditioning our school's student organization. It pushed me out of my comfort zone and helped me improve my communication skills and dancing skills. I also learned how to work in a team, how to lead, and how to listen carefully. I always gained 4 friends. I have also started taking better care of my physical health. I realized that if I want to do well in school and in life, I need to be physically and mentally healthy. I started sleeping earlier, exercising, yoga, jogging more, and even practicing calmness when things gets rough. Developing the whole person isn’t about being perfect in every area it’s about starting to grow little by little every day. I'm proud of myself somehow, and I know I still have a lot to learn. But I'm looking forward and excited at the same time for the next lesson.

balderasalejawenyia — 2025-08-05 10:08:57 UTC

‎Today, I took the MBTI Test Ms. Trisha give us and I discovered that Im an INFP. Reading the result felt like opening a door into my inner world. It was affirming, even a little emotional, to see my quiet strengths and silent struggles put into words. I have always known I carry a strong sense of empathy and imagination, but seeing it recognized as a defending trait made me feel more seen. I do spend a lot of time in my head dreaming, reflecting, and creating, but now I understand it's not a distraction, it's part of how I process the world. It's comforting to know that my desire for authencity and meaning is not a flaw it's actually a guiding force in my life. The challenges hit close to home too. I often wrestle with criticism, even when it's meant to help, and I Find routine tusks exhausting. It's true that I shy away from self promotion, even when I know I should speak up. But this awareness is empowering It show me here I need to grow and now I can support myself better. This test reminded me that being introspective, idealistic, and deeply feeling isn't something to fix it's something to honor. I just need to keep learning how to balance my inner world with the realities around me. One step at a time.

balderasalejawenyia — 2025-08-05 11:00:44 UTC

This week has been exhausting. There were moments I felt like disappearing, overwhelmed by everything. But our lessons, especially on stress and the power of the mind, helped me realize how much I’m growing. I’m developing skills and traits that aren’t even part of my family’s history, shaped instead by my own experiences. Adolescence feels like a lonely path sometimes. I’ve struggled with low self-esteem and self-doubt, asking myself, Who am I? and Will I ever reach my goals? It’s tough, but I’m still fighting. I’ve changed a lot. As a child, I was outgoing and loud, but now I’m more quiet and reserved. Physical changes made me insecure, and I’ve become more self-aware. One lesson that really hit me was about dependence. I used to be completely reliant on my mom, but as I got older, I learned to stand on my own. Her sacrifices make more sense to me now. This week has been a deep reflection on who I am and who I’m becoming. I’m grateful for these lessons and to Ms. Trisha, who made everything easier to understand. It’s been a hard week, but one that’s helped me grow.

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balderasalejawenyia — 2025-08-05 11:02:06 UTC

Today’s lesson on the Power of the Mind really opened my eyes. Learning about how the brain works, especially the left vs. right brain, made me realize how much I relate to being a right-brain thinker. I’m naturally creative, emotional, and full of wild ideas, but lately, I’ve felt stuck. Maybe it’s because I’ve been drowning in chaos with no structure to guide me.That’s why mind mapping stood out. It’s like a creative roadmap, no strict rules, just a space to let ideas flow and connect. I can already imagine using it to plan my stories or bring my random thoughts into something more solid and meaningful. More than just stress management, today was about self-awareness. I’m learning how to listen to my mind and body and live in a way that supports both. I’ll start small, maybe a quiet moment with tea, a fresh page, and some markers. And thank you so Ms. Trisha who always guide us in every lessons.