On the second day of the project, we rehearsed what we had learned the day before and performed in smaller groups, which increased the pressure for me. To my surprise, I found that I was able to remember all the choreography clearly and even attend to specific corrections from the previous day. I felt a newfound sense of confidence and assurance in my abilities, able to see how far I had progressed in a short period of time.

As I enjoy Cunningham so much, I have tried to really devote myself to the practice over the past term, and it has been incredibly rewarding to see how my engagement in my classes has benefited me. Over the term, I have been able to begin solidifying the technical aspects of the practice, giving me a foundation for the project, and I can say now that following the performance, I have also been able to push the performance aspect, finding opportunities to think beyond the steps and focus more on quality.

Following my last class with Kate Price on the 8^th of March, I wrote down each specific correction given throughout the class, in order to consolidate everything, I had been learning prior to the short week. The words I found most frequently in my notes were initiation, continuity, and lengthening.

Something that particularly spoke to me was Kate encouraging us not to dance ‘from a list', ‘checking off’ each individual step in a travelling exercise. She encouraged us to think about how we transition from one movement to the next, finding the continuity that came up so frequently in my notes. This made me think about what I could do to really dance the material, as I knew that during the rep, I would want to be fluid and continuous. The word ‘indulging’ came to mind, making me think about where I could find more weight in my arms to propel me into the next step. Where could I find more depth in my plie and greater suspension in turns and jumps?

I filmed one sequence from this class, where I applied small corrections from Kate that I feel successfully helped make my movements look longer and more continuous.

I found this approach to teaching to be perfect for me, and I found great satisfaction in watching the progression of exercises over the weeks. Repeating steps frequently allowed me to explore what makes them work and ways to do them more quickly, effectively, and smoothly. I filmed one phrase on the first day of learning it on the 23^rd of January and again on the 21^st of February, and I have been able to watch these videos again, observing the differences. Knowing the exercise so confidently allowed me to play with musicality and expansion. Not only was I able to do the exercise more quickly, but by being more efficient in certain steps, for example, rolls, I was able to free up time to find length and suspension in bridges, planks, and stretches, making the exercise not only more enjoyable to watch but more physically fulfilling for me.

Perhaps my unexpected comfort had been a result of the progression from groove to locking to popping, starting from a broad perspective, finding flow and individuality, progressively honing in on specific techniques, and finding speed and precision in locking. I feel that my accumulative experience with street dance and hip-hop-related genres up to this point has allowed me to really gain confidence when approaching new styles that fall under the umbrella, having worked on both picking up specific choreography, freestyling, and cyphering. Each popping class begins with a cypher circle, which I really enjoy as it is a great opportunity to experiment with adding popping to my own natural way of moving. The way in which Vicky encourages us to move naturally and freely without any pressure to conform to a perceived idea of ‘hip hop’ or ‘popping’ has really helped me to be confident when entering a cypher.

I have been trying out combining contemporary movements with the addition of the popping technique to see how I can link my different practices together and make unconventional choices in my improvisation.

One thing I feel has really improved about my ballet technique since coming here is my strength. With my overall increased and more versatile training, I have gained a lot of muscle, that has helped me to achieve higher extensions, jumps and longer balances. I have been consciously working to increase my strength, with exercises in the gym and physiotherapy rehab.

One thing I have been doing to help improve my performance in class specifically is introducing strengthening exercises into my warmup. Talking with my physio, I was reminded of the importance of glute strength in balance and turning, two areas I have been wanting to improve. So, I began adding pelvic bridges to my warmup before ballet, and I have found that it makes an enormous difference, really helping me to find the sensation of ‘wrapping’ that my ballet teachers would talk about. In classes where I did the pelvic bridges beforehand, I found that I could achieve more pirouettes and longer balances.

Similarly, I found that to achieve better attitude turns, I needed to find more engagement in my gluteus medius. I added clams to my warmup and similarly found that this made a noticeable difference in my turns. I feel that the exercises not only help me to physically engage my muscles but also increase my mental awareness, helping me tap into some of the imagery used in class—wrapping and shortening.

Observing the powerful and positive effect this had on the class, I aimed to bring some of that same energy into my second attempt through my voice. When counting in for my exercise, I aimed to set the rhythm for both the students and the musician, almost singing the quality. I found that this really helped people to maintain consistent timing throughout the exercise, and as shared with me by Dom, it allowed him to assess how much energy to bring when beginning to play. By simply being clear and musical when counting in the sequence, I felt I was able to provide more clarity than in my first attempt.

One idea shared with me by Anna Helsby is the idea of imagining the bottom rib closing towards the pelvis. By using imagery, I am inadvertently engaging my core, allowing me to find more stable and secure balances. It is interesting to see how this idea helps me find strong core engagement by thinking about ‘shortening’ the stomach muscles, whereas simply being told to use my core does not have the same effect. Similarly, I have been able to find more stability by engaging my back muscles with the idea of wings that are widespread across the upper back. Having naturally protruding shoulder blades, I have found it difficult to flatten my back surface, creating the round, engaged shape that supports balance and turns. But this idea of wings, first shared with me at LCDS, has really helped me to find those feelings and helped to improve my overall performance. I am fascinated by the way imagery can manipulate and affect movement within dancers, using it to guide my own movement and finding it to be my natural style of teaching others, having used it on children and my peers during teaching practice.

I chose this exercise as I often find it difficult to engage my turn-out muscles when starting with plies at the beginning of the class. First position would feel uncomfortable and unnatural to me, and I would often wish that we would start facing towards the barre with a simple warm-up. The sequence me and my partner formulated was therefore intended for the very beginning of the class before plie. Because of this, it was important that the exercise was not overly complex or fast, as we would not be sure how much warm-up our students had engaged in prior to the class.

Additionally, it was important for us to think about the pace of the music and what effect it would have on movement. Both Jeannie and Dom spent a lot of our time in teaching practice discussing the effects of music and rhythm choice on an exercise and how it can not only change the feeling but also help to emphasise different intentions. For example, when my exercise was counted with binary subdivision, it was slower and there was more time to spend articulating the feet, whereas with ternary subdivision, focus was shifted towards quick and smooth transitions from one step to another and finding lightness in quality. This experience was interesting as it encouraged me to think about the music in my own classes and how it can encourage me to work in particular ways, and additionally helping me to think about these decisions in future, If I am ever to teach my own classes.

DESCRIPTION

What happened?

There was a member of staff from the school watching our floorwork class, interested in seeing what we do. We had been working on a travelling phrase that I found difficult, as it contained a number of steps I had not yet mastered. Therefore, when it came time to do the exercise, I told the teacher jokingly, ‘I can’t do this with someone watching’.

FEELINGS

What were you thinking and feeling?

I felt the exercise wasn’t worthy of being shown because I wasn’t able to do some of the steps. I had an internal sense that I needed to impress this audience by showing things that were perfect, or else I would be embarrassed.

EVALUATION

What was good and bad about the experience?

By having this mindset, I limit myself from progressing because I avoid doing the exercise and therefore get less practice time and lower my own confidence. I know that I am physically capable of doing everything in the class, but my lack of confidence makes it harder for me to even try.

ANALYSIS

What sense can you make of a situation?

I have noticed my own tendency to self-deprecate in class, noticing I will often say ‘I can’t do this’ aloud to my classmates and teachers. I feel like I do this to say it myself before anyone else can. If I have cemented in others minds that this is something I can’t do, then it won’t be surprising if I fail, which gives me a sense of control. I often feel I need to be seen as perfect and capable of everything. I didn’t want an outsider who ‘hasn’t seen all my best abilities’ to perceive me based on a weaker moment.

CONCLUSION

What else could you have done?

I could have changed this experience with a different mindset. I could see that this person was not there to pass judgement on us but probably to enjoy it. I could approach the exercise with an accepting attitude, acknowledging that it’s okay to have weaker moments. I could see that avoiding the phrase was taking away from my own practice time and an opportunity to improve.

ACTION PLAN

If it arose again what would you do?

I have made an active decision to stop saying negative things about myself and my abilities. I have reflected on the harmful impact this has on me and others around me, and by making this change, I hope to bring a more positive attitude to the class.