Evidence: About 4 million people visit the Great Wall of China every year, and this adds up to more than $68 million in revenue per year.

Evidence: The Kranji War Memorial represents the three branches of the military (the Air Force, Army and Navy), and is dedicated to the soldiers who died defending Singapore and Malaya against the invading Japanese forces during World War II.

This gives students the opportunity to gain more knowledge outside of a classroom setting and to seek enrichment programmes that are better catered to their pace of learning.

Evidence: As part of the Being Human Festival, Bangor University organised a free field trip to heritage sites in North Wales. During this educational journey, an archaeologist would give a detailed explanation of the site's historical milestones.

While this enables students to explore the "outside world", it also reminds the younger generation of our culture and traditions

With 43% of our Earth inhabited by humans, buildings of all shapes, sizes and colours dot this planet we call home. However, as our society becomes more advanced, old architecture are slowly forgotten, and gradually become nothing more than a figment of our imagination, while new buildings spring up almost every day. Nonetheless, we have to acknowledge the need for historical architecture, which are of great value in terms of preserving culture, in our ever-changing world.

The thesis is quite specific and addresses the points to be discussed in the essay :----)

Your claims and rebuttals are well supported with evidence, but perhaps you could elaborate more to make them more specific

Perhaps you could elaborate more and give more examples for your counter-argument?