Suddenly, the driver stopped the bus and opened the door. It was then I realized what was happening. Everybody was already at the door trying to get out. At that moment I quickly thought about my baggage so I caught it before getting out. 

All the passengers had to wait on the road in the middle of the highway until the firmen got there because that the bus had began to burn. I felt really shocked when I saw that. In the end, fortunately, another bus came to pick us up. 

We'd been flying for a few hours. I was reading a very interesting psychology book quietly, and my husband was checking messages on his phone, when suddenly, we heard a man proposing to his girlfriend. 

At that moment the woman began to cry, and then she put on the ring that the man had given her. Fortunately, she said that she wanted to marry him. Then all the passengers began to whistle and clap to celebrate the fantastic news. At once,  I thought I would have liked to be in that woman's shoes. It seemed like a very special way to ask a person for marriage.

• Give a title to your story

• write three parargraphs (setting, development, ending)

• make the text fluent using connectors

• enrich the narrative with the help of adverbs and description of feelings

• use varied tenses: past simple active or passive, past continous, past perfect simple, continuous, or passive

• Your name & Surname at the bottom of your text

• Add a picture if you wish (contact your teacher if you have technical problems)

DEADLINE: 19th November 14pm

This happened last Semana Santa, when my girlfriend and I were going to Roma by plane, as a birthday present.

The day before the flight, my girlfriend saw, doing the check in, WHILE WE WERE CHECKING IN that THERE was a mistake. She HAD bought an expensive ticket, to take one of the firsts flights in the morning, but when she checked EVERYTHING out, saw that the flight was HAD BEEN cancelled. The day of the TRIP travel, my parents took us to the airport, to ask for some explanation, because they didn't pick up the phone calls. Ryanair said that the flight had been changed A FEW days BEFORE ago and THAT all the passengers HAD received an email with this change, but this wasn't our case.

THE STAFF AT THE TERMINAL WERE TOTALLY UNCOOPERATIVEUntil we mentioned the paper of COMPLAINTS reclamations, because of our frustration, BUT they STILL didn't do anything. Fortunately, Ryanair gave us a ticket for the next flight, but we had to wait 7hours at the airport,AND missing our visit to the coliseum.

Sandra L 16DL

• Quite well developed, quite fluent  and structured, although it still needs some context for the reader

• Varied vocabulary  but the use of tenses is limited

This happened to me last Easter, when my partner and I were travelling by train from Barcelona to Sevilla. PrevioUsly, we had decided took our bikes with us because we had been planning to ride the Pilgrim's path from Sevilla to Caceres. We had packaged the bikes carefully.

Certainly, the train was full of people with really heavy luggage. While the train was moving I was watching a film with my headphones and my partner was checking messages on his phone. Shortly/SOON AFTERWARDS, before arriving we noticed the bikes weren't in the place that we had previosly left THEM. Obviosly, we thought someone had stollen STOLEN them. We were totally surprised.

Eventually, we went to talk with the conductor and he told us that the bikes had been MOVED moving because they were in a wrong place and were disturbing the passengers. Afterwards, we IMMEDIATELY felt relieved. Luckily, we got our bikes BACKS in good conditions.

Ana Isabel Martin Perez

• Well developed, quite fluent  and structured

• Varied vocabulary  and tenses with occasional mistake

Last holiday, my husband and I went to New York by plane. It had been A PRESENT given by our daughters, because we had celebrated our wedding birthday, so we were absolutely happy/DELIGHTED with the trip.  Unfortunately the day before TRAVELLING I had been feeling sick BUT . We went to the airport and the LUCKILY plane took off on time.

DURING THE FLIGHT We were reading interesting books. Suddenly when we were flying over the Atlantic we had/ STARTED TO HAVE turbulences.The plane started to go up and down like a real rollercoaster.  FOR THIS REASON The cabin crew didn't deliver drinks or food, AND all the people put the seatbelts. To be honest we were REALLY scared. Gradually I STARTED TO FEEL WORSE AND WORSE was feeling incredibly worse and I fainted. TO BE HONEST I can't remember anything OF WHAT HAPPENED NEXT.

Eventually I had a chance I WAS LUCKY because there was a doctor and after a while I came round and got over it. In the end we landed in NY and we could enjoy the city.

M. Dolors Franquesa

• Well developed, quite fluent  and structured, but it needs more time expressions and connectors to help the reader

• Varied vocabulary  and tenses, with occsional translation ( I had chance)

This happened to me when I was nineteen years old. I was in ON a train going from Barcelona to Vic when I decided to sit in front of a young man with a dog.

I took a pencil out of my bag in order to write in/ON my notebook but it fell down. UNLUCKILY So, then the dog started to play with it. Fortunately, the young man took off his headphones, caught my pencil and KINDLY gave it to me. Unbelievably, we talked during the whole trip!

In the end, when I had to leave the train, he figured out he hadn't asked my number. So, I wrote it in a paper for him. Surprisingly, he contacted me immediately, and one day we met for a coffee. In fact, we started dating afterwards. It turned out it had been love at first sight! I couldn't believe it! I HAD feLlt totally in love with him!

Patrícia Villacampa

• Well developed, fluent  and structured

• Varied vocabulary  and tenses

This happened to me when my family and I were returning by plane from a 15 -day trip from LA to Barcelona in August 2023.

Two days before, Hilary, a category 4 hurricane had HIT afected the southwest of the US right at the time/WHEN we were in LA. Fortunately, when the hurricane hit LA, it had been transitioned to a tropical storm category. Despite that, there were torrential rains and floods and TV was annuncing the catastrophic and life-threatening consequencies. At that moment/TIME , we were really scared and waiting to return to Barcelona.

Then, things got worse when they announced that hundreds of flights had been canceled due to the tropical storm including ours , causing a real chaos in the airport.

In the end, we were able to return to Barcelona two days later than expected and I have to say it was an incredibly adventure.

Salomé Juan

• Well developed, fluent  and structured

• Varied and rich vocabulary  and tenses

This happened to me when I was in Barcelona Sants the last Friday. I was waiting in the queue to pass the security control when suddenly, the spoker SPEAKER said that I HAD must go to the ANother security control right THEN now because the gates will WOULD close in 3 minutes.

I had been running for 1 minute to arrive in the security control. When I was passing the control, the security man stopped me because I had a strange object in my baggage. Then, he opened, and I had clothes, shoes, some dirty clothes and also, I had some needleS sTORED to practiSce ACUPUNCTURE techniques to be a nurse with my brother. For this reason, the security man asked me what was that because he thought that it was something illegal or to hurt someone.

In the end, when I had PASSED to pass the control, I started to laugh a lot because It was/HAD BEEN a funny situation.

Martina Serra Salart

• Well developed,quite fluent  and structured

• Varied vocabulary  and tenses

This happened to me LAST SUMMER when I was on a plane to go to Azores, (last summer). I went with my parents and my friends. We took a flight from Oporto and had a stopover en Lisboa to arrive IN Azores.

The first FLIGHT fly was well/FINE, but ON the second one, when we were arriving AT the island, the light´s belt LIGHT WAS switched on, so the passengers couldn´t get up. At the same THAT moment the cabine crew sat on their emergency positions, and the pilot said to TOLD us that the visibility in the sky wasn´t GOOD enough to land, . FOR THIS REASON so we SPENT were flying 20 minutes FLYING around THE ISLAND it. When we already EVENTUALLY knew that everything was fine for landing, the windy began and that caused turbulances. Before approximately AFTER ABOUT 15 minutes with turbulances the pilot LANDED got land in the landing track.

In summary we wereHAD BEEN REALLY / very frightened DURING THE FLIGHT , because we were thinking that we couldn´t arrive AT our destination, but when the situation was aleady under control, we felt satisfaction. RELIEVED

Lucía Domínguez.

• The text is not always clear for the reader, in fact the conclusion is the description of feeliongs

• remember that the past continuous can't be used on its own (we were flying for twenty minutes)

• language use is not totally under control, some vocabulary is translated, more time expressions and more variesty of tenses would be welcome

This happened to me last summer when I went with my mother and my grandmother to Lisbon on vacation. We took the flight from Barcelona to Lisbon to visit the city because we had never been THERE before, so .

The day we had the flight we went to the airport and BOARDED THE PLANE ON TIME /took the flight, Aafter almost two hours of flight FLYING the pilot announced that we were about to arrive so we had to put on our seatbelts ON for the landing, . IT WAS THEN THAT but that was when things got worse, suddenly we began to see the buildings closer and closer, there was EVEN a moment when it seemed like we were going to touch them with our wings. So we When people realized WHAT WAS HAPPENING this, they started to get scared and started shouting that we were going to crash.

Finally, the plane landed without any problemS, but the scare we had lasted a few hours.

Marta Servat

• The text is colloquial, long sentences with commas (no ".") and connected by "so".

• language is repettivie (flight) and there aren't many connectors to help the develOpment.

• use of tenses isn't really varied: mostly simple past tenses

I'm going to tell you a past experience that happened when I and my wife were ready to travel by plane to Costa Rica to celebrate our anniversary

First of all we arrived at the airport two hours in advance. The first setback was that the flight was going to leave a few hours late, AND when the fligh finally left we had a BUMBY hilly trip due to the bad weather with a lot of turbulences. EVENTUALLY We arrived at the/OUR destination the next day than expected and we went by taxi to the hotel we had booked. When we arrived at the hotel and handed over our passports the recepcionist told us that our names weren't on the guesTs list. We argueD for a while until I decided to phoned PHONE the travel agency to confirm the hotel.

Luckily the situation became clear, there WERE was two hotels with a similar name and we had gone to the wrong hotel. After a while /IN THE END we arrived at the correct hotel AND WE SARTED OUR WONDERFUL HOLIDAYS .

Ginés Campillo

• Well developed, quite fluent  and structured, but some connectors would be welcome

• Varied vocabulary  and tenses but there are problmes in conjugation and coordinating singular and plural

THIS HAPPENED WHEN I WAS TRAVELLING BY PLANE ON HOLIDAYS. The journey did not start well, the first flight, from LA to Chicago, was delayed five hours because of a problem with the plane’s engine. we ALSO suffered two intensive moments of turbulences. THEN, We arrived late to IN Chicago, so we lost the connecting flight to London.

We were in a strangely empty airport terminal waiting fFOR more than seven hours to the next flight. Everything was closed: restaurants, shops...BUT WE COULDN'T EAT OR BUY ANYTHING Basically, everyone was at home eating roasted turkey and having fun... It was the famous Thanksgiving Day, A BANK HOLIDAY WHEN EVERYTHING IS CLOSED! I was/FELT tired and hungry. I hadn’t eaten anything for hours!

Apparently, I read this in an article few years later, this day is one of the busiest days of the year at airports in the USA...

LUCKILY WE HAD NO PROBLEMS BORADING THE FLIGHT TO LONDON BUT I SPENT THE FLIGHT THINKING OF MORE POSSIBLE PROBLEMS: After that, while I was flying to London, I had been thinking what else could happen: more turbulence, a kidnapping... but in fact, the rest of the trip was, finally, perfect: the connecting flight London-Barcelona, the both cabin crews, even the baggage reclaim!

MARTA CERVELLÓ

Note:

• It's not easy to identify: the reader needs more context, andideas better grouped into into setting, body and ending.

• Try no to exceed the number of words, and ommit perhaps, some of the ditails

• Language and tenses varied

Since I was a child, I have had a dream:. My dream was to travel to Europe to get a better life. I was so focused on my youth DREAM that I didn't go to class.

I'm from Wakanda, and in my country, almost 90% of people want to cross the sea AND LIVE IN ADIFFERNE PLACE.

I've HAD been working in a coffee center for 4 years, and all of these years I was tired of listening HEARING to people say that Europe was a kind of heaven. UNLUCKILY TV manipulated us with false information.

WHEN I EVENTUALLY WAS ABLE TO COME TO EUROPE My surprise was that when I was there, that THE place didn't look like ANYTHING they HAD told us/ WE HAD BEEN TOLD

I had traveled around Europe, and I HADN'T SEEN /didn't see anything special, even my country seemed better. I had been spending SPENT all these years in vain ON A DREAM THAT COULD NEVER BECOME TRUE, and it was funny.

El Moutaouakil Chikh

The text needs better organization for the reader, to see clearly the setting, the body and the ending of the story

use of language is not always correct and need more connectors to folow it better. Experimental use of tenses.

In 2015, I was in Glasgow, visiting a friend, and I decided to search for a famous Jersey Island cow's milk. Because of its freshness, I would have to buy it the same day that I was leaving Scotland.

I searched for the nearest supermarket to the airport, but they were out of milk, so I had to go farther to find IT a supplied one. Once I HAD finally found the milk, I had to take a train back to the airport. Unfortunately, it took longer than expected and I misssed my flight even though it had been delayed for one hour. I felt really disappointed because it was Sunday, and I had to go to work at 8am on Monday in Barcelona, so I had to quicKly improvise. I took a flight to Murcia and from there, a bus in ON an 8 hour night trip to Barcelona.

I arrived just in time TO MY OFFICE, and luckily, the milk arrived in perfect condition and tasted delicious. IT WAS WORTH ALL THE HASSLE The inconvenience was worth it.

Pol Romeu 16DL

• Well developed, fluent  and structured

• Varied vocabulary  and tenses

That This happened to me when I was 18 years old while I was driving my beautiful 250cc motorcycle in Barcelona.

At that time, it wasn't compulsory to wear helmets. In fact, people didn't use them so anyone could see who was driving. In that case, it was me, a girl (it was very unusual to see a girl driving a big motorcyle in town).

I decided to drive faster because I saw/HAD SEEN a car with two boys that they were following me. A few minutes later, these boys started telling me thingS like "look at this girls trying to drive a motorcycle bigger than her, etc". While they were laughing, I started to think what I could do because they were hounding STALKING me.

Fortunately, I saw a police car and I stopped next to it. At that moment, the car of these boys disappeared and I was relieved. In the end, I felt safe again.

Lola Veciana

Well developed, fluent  and structured

Varied vocabulary  nice use of tenses but past perfect or passive structures are missing

Many years ago, I travelled alone BY PALNE FROM on a flight. That happened on a trip from Crete to Athens.

I had arrived to Crete from Cyprus and there I had to take a flight to Athens. My fligh was next morning, so I had to spend all the night in/AT the airport.

But aAround midnight I saw that the departures board informs INFORMDED OF a flight to Athens. I immediately asked if I could travel in that flight. I could, and quickly the airport's staff checked in my baggage and took me to the plane. When I got on the plane I saw that trere was WERE no passengerS. I was very surprised and little scared, but the cabin crew explained to me that they were travelling whithout passengers because they had to take off next morning from Athens TO ANOTHER DETINATION.

When we landed, I got off alone and I went to the baggage reclaim to collect alone the only suitcase.

Anna Figueras Garriga

Note:

• Well developed and quit, fluent   but there are times that you don't need so many words

• Quite well structured, but as you can see, I've devided the first paragraph in two: setting & development

• Varied vocabulary and tenses . Occasional problems of conjugation and possessive structure

This happened to my family on a plane, when my husband and I, and our seven and five-year-old daughters, went to Fuerteventura for/ ON a holiday. The flight was being very comfortable aNd the girls were quietly playing with their dolls when the pilot asked the passengers to prepare for landing. He warned INFORMED that there was a very strong wind and turbulences, so the landing might be a bit rough.

Suddenly, the plane plummeted sharply, the lights went out, one overhead locker opened, and some suitcases fell out. I was horrified and I thought my daughters were too. But, on the contrary, they were laughing with their arms in the air and shouting excitedly: wow, this is better than the roller-coaster!!!!

A few minutes later, the plane landed on the runway with a big shake. I was tremblING ed until we got out of the plane, but for my daughters it had been a fun adventure.

Maria Vilasó

• Well developed, fluent  and structured

• Varied vocabulary  and tenses

It THIS happened with me in about 4 FOUR monthS ago on my way back from Antaly (Turkey) to Barcelona. There are no direct flight SO and i I took flits FLIGHTSwith connection in Zurich airport.

It was enough time TO TRANSFER for transferring and in departuing area in Zurich airport i I found flight to Barcelona in ON THE departures board and did not paid PAY attention that the departing time in the flight was in 10 mins later then in MY boarding pass.

When i I come to the gait GATE at needed time and had been providing SOWED my boarding pass they said that it is another flight and THAT IT WAS now boarding to my flight had been going in another airport terminal.

The things is WAS the two flight almost at the same time was WERE going to Barcelona from Zurich and I HAD GONETO THE WRONG ONE i took not the right

So I’ve lost my flight and had to wait another day to come back home.

Alexey Kosovtsev

• The text is qute well structured, but it's occasionally difficult to follow becasue of the mistakes

• language is varied but past perfect is still experimental. there are still some spelling prorblems.

This happened when I was travelling by boat WITH SOME FRIENDS. Everything was going well until suddenly the boat collided with an underwater rock. Then I noticed how the inflatable part of the boat began to deflate and the boat began to sink a little bit. Unfortunately the engine stopped working because of the impact.

The first thing I did was to call Maritime Rescue using the radio. I waited calmly on the boat and half an hour later a maritime rescue ship arrived and towed us to the nearest port. They threw us a rope and towed us for a long distance.

Finally, an hour later I had already arrived at the port and everything went well and no one was injured and the boat could be repaired. It is an experience that happened a long time ago and that I will never forget.

Éric Pardo

• text well structured and fluent

• varied tenses and vocabulary

Moments before the incident my mother had to go to the bathroom and severely told my dad to look after me, as he is known in the family to be a person who is absentminded. My mum left in a rush, so my dad was left in charge with my older sister and me in a stroller. While my mum was away my dad started looking at the monuments holding my sister's hand and of course, leaving me behind as he got distracted.

My mum any time now came back and found me all alone in the middle of Pisa. Fortunately for me, I didn't hear it but an argument had been made on the flight back home.