https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0 Writing Business Messages en-us 2016-09-16 00:16:57 UTC 2025-10-13 05:32:38 UTC hello@padlet.com redford_bill https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0/wish/124231849 Locate an example of professional communication from a reputable online source.  Evaluate the effectiveness of the communication at several levels, starting with paragraph structure.  Are paragraphs unified and cohesive?  Does it have a clear topic sentence?  Does it support and clarify the topic?  Evaluate each sentence.  Are they easy to read?  Are they varied?  Does it follow a flow or rhythm?  Is the most important idea presented clearly throughout?  Evaluate at least six word choices.  Did the writer use the words correctly and effectively?]]> 2016-09-16 00:18:24 UTC https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0/wish/124231849 redford_bill https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0/wish/124232390 Grace
Hou
Janet
Kaylee
Oscar

IOS 10  (Apple)

http://www.apple.com/ios/ios-10/

The effectiveness of the communication at the paragraph level we  believe is short and concise.  Apple also adds pictures and videos that goes congruently with what they are trying to convey to its audience.
Yes it does have a clear topic sentence that gives an exciting intro to the upgrade. 
Yes they are extremely easy to read (short and concise).
Yes it is varied and it does have flow and rhythm. The most important idea presented is clearly expressed.
In chapter 4 it says to use "you" and "Your" to get the audience completely involved in the experience. Has descriptive words: beautiful, good, rich, contextual, swap and simple touch. 

Action words "slap instead of put"  this would be an aggressive way of writing verses passive. 

]]> 2016-09-16 00:23:43 UTC https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0/wish/124232390 redford_bill https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0/wish/124232396 Jonathan Arcaraz
Yobani Gonzalez
Ninb Odisho
Victor Cruz
1. It's well organized and subdivided into different points. Each paragraph explains a key point. 
2. It uses both unified and cohesive methods. It creates a smooth flow from one sentence to the other. 
3. The article gives a clear bolded heading for each paragraph which smoothly transitions the audience into a clear topic sentence.
4. Each paragraph starts with a question and gives the audience feedback about the specific question, therefore supporting and clarifying each topic.
5. The article is easy to read because it tries to relate to the audience and it doesn't use any type of foreign terms or complicated vocabulary.
6. The article does follow a flow and rhythm by going from one point to another that is related to the previous. 
7. Yes, the most important idea is presented because the article states its point multiple times throughout the article. 

Six words: 
"Biggest"- states importance of the upgrade
"Controversial"- shows how upgrade had a rough start
"Mirroring"- stating that the new feature was similar to one of another software
"Mimic"- 
"Rivaling"- shows the importance of a challenge with another software.
"Mainstream"- shows the importance of IOS.
9. Yes, the writers did use the words correctly and effectively because it keeps the audience attention while keeping the article entertaining.
 


]]> 2016-09-16 00:23:47 UTC https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0/wish/124232396 redford_bill https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0/wish/124232413 Margarita Tapia
Adam
Yochana
Chris
Jeffrey

http://newsroom.fb.com/news/2016/04/marknote/

1. Paragraphs are unified and cohesive. Each flows into the other explaining and breakin down Zuckerberg's statement and proposal.

2. Very clear topic sentence. "Everything we do at Facebook is focused on our mission to make the world more open and connected."

3. Supports topic by ensuring shareholders of facebooks future

4. Sentences are easy to read and most likely understandable by the average Facebook user.

5. Each paragraph leads into the other. Good flow and rhythm. 

6. Most important idea is presented first and supported throughout. 

7. "Mission"- shows shareholders that Facebook has a purpose and plan
"focus"- grabs the readers attention and uses it to explain a proposal
"future"- reassures shareholders that a prosperous future is ahead
"grow"- implies that the company will be expanding which is positive in the shareholders eyes
"connect"- one of facebooks main purpose is to connect people
"investors"- shows that mark cares about the investors
"Journey"- expressing willingness to continue on a journey with shareholders.

8. We believe he effectively used all these words to propose his idea and reassure his shareholders. ]]> 2016-09-16 00:23:51 UTC https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0/wish/124232413 redford_bill https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0/wish/124232424 http://www.forbes.com/sites/scottgottlieb/2016/09/12/how-congress-can-make-drug-pricing-more-rational/#6e2843f42f6b

Karina Penalo
Jose Godinez
Nayeli Espinoza
Gabriel Perez
Charisse Narain 

1. The paragraph starts off by informing the reader what the topic is about and why it is debated. The paragraphs are organized and cohesive. The introduction gets straight to the main argument.

2.  The topic is clear; the reader knows what the argument is about.

3. The question is clearly stated in the beginning of the article, and then leads into answering the topic 

4. Most of the sentences and the wording in the article are easy to understand and read. However, the vocabulary used is more complex. 

5. Each sentence is supported one after the other, and it follows the organization of the paragraphs.

6. It starts with the argument they are trying to make and it stays with the topic. It explains throughout the paragraphs the point they are trying to make.

7. No, the most important idea is not presented throughout the text. It talks more about the change in price affects more the companies than the actual patients who need the Epipen. 

8. Rebates- can be used as discounts
Supply middleman- describe the shareholders
Legal- shows how the government intervenes with drugs.
Access- used as a restriction to get into somewhere.
Epipen- antibiotic, shows how the drug is important to the patients and the economy
Economy- how it affects the profit and pricing from the drug.
Congress- government official, decision makers
 
9. Are the words effectively used? Yes, all are used correctly according to the text.



]]> 2016-09-16 00:23:55 UTC https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0/wish/124232424 redford_bill https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0/wish/124232430 2016-09-16 00:23:59 UTC https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0/wish/124232430 redford_bill https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0/wish/124232437 Brian Ball 
Paola Zarza Mora 
Mario Rueda
Alondra Ayala

This email communication from Apple CEO, Tim Cook, to the entire employee roster was an important communication from executive management down the entire employee ladder. Given the level of importance of this message, the letter is not very well structured, nor very concise in its message. Some word choices that did come across very effectively include: American, law-abiding citizens, support, freedom, security, and protect. These powerful words convey to the reader that the issue at hand is not happening to others, but to the reader themselves. Therefore, this choice of words leaves the reader understanding the urgency and necessity for consumer data security. In the final paragraph, Tim Cook does summarize the overall message very well. That message is one that states the importance that Apple consumers place on the security of their data, and Apple will continue to serve that need and desire of their customers. 

Law-abiding citizen: Tim is speaking of apple customers as if they abide all rules when in reality we can't really be sure of that.

Freedom: Our "freedom" is being violated by our government.

Support: Using this word to praise the reader.

American:  Any speaker that uses the this word is certainly hoping to evoke stron 
http://www.theverge.com/2016/2/22/11092028/apple-tim-cook-fbi-encryption-internal-memo]]> 2016-09-16 00:24:03 UTC https://padlet.com/redford_bill/47l9nse1men0/wish/124232437