Bre's Mind💕 by Bre

Beautiful Dreams

Bre_2004 — 2021-05-18 13:46:48 UTC

Standing in a field of beautiful flowers

Bathing in their sweet perfume

Engulfed in soft rain showers

Wish i wasn’t imagining it alone in my room

This beautiful place in my head

I wish it were a real place

I want to share it instead

Don’t wanna be alone with all that space

We could lay out in the sun

And make whistles out of grass

Always make our own fun

And never have to go to class

We could run through the flowers

And swim in the sparkling lake

We could laugh and talk for hours

And live in palaces we make

We could live wild and free

Only eat what we hunt

Be whoever we wanna be

What more could we want?

So lets build this glorious place

And bathe in sweet floral perfume

Let soft raindrops kiss our faces

I don’t have to imagine it alone in my room

Let’s make this place from my head

We could make it real

Be together instead

And know every joy there is to feel!

Light Brown Eyes

Bre_2004 — 2021-05-18 13:47:41 UTC

He fell in love with her light brown eyes

Didn’t see the sadness in disguise

And she would hide it so well

That even she fell

For the smile on her face

Because there was happiness on her face

But when he walked in one day

And her hair was astray

Her makeup all runny

And her mood not sunny

He could see that she could feel the pain

That was locked up so tightly that it was insane

She was curled in a ball

Her head resting on the wall

He wanted to ask what was wrong

But he could tell it was locked away for too long

So he just sat down beside her

And he vowed to do whatever he could to help her

Even though he didn’t know exactly what to do

There was one thing he knew

He would be her everything

And he would do anything

Whenever she called he would be there

Anytime and anywhere

Jules

Bre_2004 — 2021-05-18 13:48:56 UTC

Her heart is like porcelain

So handle her with care

She will be your biggest sin

But her beauty makes you stop and stare

Her skin, soft as velvet

Her eyes, deep as the ocean

Her thoughts, deep as a pit

So easy to get lost in

And her porcelain heart

Surrounded by a wall made of steel

It's really a work of art

And electrified like an eel

It has happened before

Her heart has shattered like glass

So her wall has no door

To shelter her from her past

Her heart has been beaten

Beyond recognition

By boyfriends who cheated

And her parent’s poor decision

She spent so long hiding

Never really dealing

Her time, she was biding

To help with the healing

But she seems to be giving up

Feels like there’s nowhere to turn

She needs someone to help her up

She feels so torn

She doesn’t want anyone hurt

That's just how she is

Never worries about just her

No matter what anyone says

She’s losing herself

She doesn't know what to do

She’ll just put her emotions on a shelf

So they don’t have to worry too

Because she can’t handle their pain

She doesn’t wanna be the cause

It just adds to the strain

And the fake smile she puts on in the halls

She checks in sometimes

So they know she’s okay

But they know her tough times

And beside her they will stay

She knows

But she is afraid

She wonders if it shows

All her progress, unmade

She loves them

But doesn’t want them to worry

She wants to get better

She wants so bad to hurry

But this sickness wont let her

She's being bombarded with optimism

And she knows they care

But this sickness feels like a cataclysm

And it fills her with despair

She knows the possibility

And she wants to be happy

To beat the probability

So life doesn’t seem so crappy

She's gonna be okay

She keeps saying it

So that maybe the thought will stay

And maybe, just maybe she’ll believe it

When I Loved You

Bre_2004 — 2021-05-18 13:51:55 UTC

Watching you with that look on your face

Walking away leaving too much space

What could possibly be wrong with you

Don’t you know that your pain hurts me too

Why does it hurt me so much when you feel this way

Beyond words that I could even bother to say?

I know that I would be here whenever you need me

Wherever you need me to be

I would be there with no questions asked

Even if you try to keep all of your emotions masked

I’ll be right here through the good and the bad

Through all of the bad experiences you’ve had

I love you with my whole heart

And I always have even from the start

With love, there are no limits to what I would do

Especially when I’m doing it for you.

So, of course, seeing that look on your face

Walking away from me leaving too much space

Wondering what could be wrong with you

Seeing you in so much pain hurts me too

So why not tell me what’s up

When you are down I wanna bring you back up

Nothing hurts me more than seeing you in pain

Don’t make me try so many times in vain

I love you way too much

And when you are in pain it feels like a punch

I wanna help you get better

In hot or even cold weather

My heart is pulled by your tether

Cause I am yours and you are mine

For now and forever

Lost

Bre_2004 — 2021-05-18 13:56:03 UTC

What this is I cannot tell,

Is this Heaven? Is this Hell?

There are really amazing people here,

Is there really anything to fear?

But I’ve lost my sight

Of everything right.

Is this reality?

Life without my family?

Why am I not relieved?

This is everything I believed,

Would make me happy unless,

I can’t live without the ongoing mess.

Lord, please help me, hear my plea!

Bring my family back to me!

I miss them so much that I might cry!

I was not ready to say goodbye!

I can’t believe I made that choice!

I mustn’t live without the running girls and boys!

I try and try but I will never see,

The family that I want back with me.

But who would know or even care

I see my regret everywhere

It is all I can think and all that I see

I just want my family back with me.

Broke...

Bre_2004 — 2021-05-20 04:27:37 UTC

why do i dream of having you?
after everything you did to me
and you don't have a clue
I am as broken as I'll ever be
but still you haunt my heart
and inside my mind you lurk
and now that we are apart
you've made me feel like a jerk
and my heart is still so heavy
on my feet i feel unsteady
why wont you let me be
because i wasn't ready
to say goodbye
to call it quits
could we try
to pick up the bits
no?
that's all right
I'll just go
wont put up a fight
but before I do
just know one thing
I still love you
and the joy you used to bring...

12:46am

Bre_2004 — 2021-05-20 04:43:42 UTC

Can't sleep
i have counted sheep
i have tried it all
i've had a ball
but i just can't
so i must rant
its 12:46
and i'm one of those chicks
who comes alive at night
ready to fight
but tonight I am sad
I think about the life I had
the nightmares so vivid
As a little girl, I hid
what is wrong with me, love
I have prayed to above
but I got nothing
and I am tired of running
Goodbye cruel night
bring back the light
to chase these monsters away
i want the day please, i pray
i just wanna be free
of the demons chasing me
let me sleep
just a little peep.....

Her Struggle

Bre_2004 — 2021-05-20 16:30:27 UTC

she shines with the brightness of a thousand suns
and everyone stops to stare
her beauty on display for everyone
but she seems unaware
Her friends don't know
who she really is
because she puts on a show
for all of the kids
she wants to be something
but she's losing faith
she feels like she is nothing
she is losing this race
she is falling behind
and she is gonna lose
no one is kind
and she can't even choose
the path that she wants
she wants her own life
her family is a dying plant
and they are causing her strife
she just wants to be wanted
for who she really is
she wants to be supported
in the life SHE wants to live
by someone who doesn't care that she's pretty
someone who doesn't consider height
right now everyone is sh*tty
they are winning the fight
and she may gleam like the stars
but she doesn't see
she only sees the scars
and the girl she used to be
she could always get the boy
and they are always fooled
they think she's a toy
and that's not cool
she always dumps them
because she feels like a fraud
they already treat her like an item
and its just too hard
but one day she found music
and it was her saving grace
but one day she'll lose it
like the well kept mask on her face.

Help me..

Bre_2004 — 2021-05-25 16:07:33 UTC

what is it about me?
she wonders in the mirror
why can't they see
the monster within her?
they say she has a pretty face
but its been getting harder
to hide her inner disgrace
They only see the mask
not her true self
they don't see her past
or her baggage on the shelf
and she is tired of hiding
behind a fake smile
she is tired of trying
it never used to be her style
so she turned to music
it was her medicine
and she would use it
so she could be normal again
she would be the perfect fit
and it worked just like she hoped
she got lost in the melody
it helped her to cope
the past didn't sit so heavily
on her scarred up heart
but soon the notes were gone
and she was left in the dark
and everything felt wrong

Pain

Bre_2004 — 2021-05-25 22:40:05 UTC

Her pain consumes her
like a tsunami swallowing land
she is so absorbed she is left in a blur
it hurts so much she can't even stand
She is always hiding
So much that nobody knew she existed
She is always crying
No one even cared, they never listened
she sits there and wonders why
is she the one to blame
every day she would cry
just for someone to know her name she screams so loud, but no one can hear
no one to trust, she knows not what to do
she wants someone to hold her near
but no one wants to
please, she whimpers
but no one is there
help, she whispers
but no one will care

For my Mom

Bre_2004 — 2021-09-03 13:23:26 UTC

I know that you care
though I feel you're unaware
and I know that you sad
but I can't help but feel bad
because all these years
and all of the tears
its hard to get over
but you're a four leaf clover
because I know you
and what I have said is true
for even though its hard
and my feelings have been marred
I mustn't be selfish
cause your life has been hellish
but one fact holds true
I will always love you

Come Back

Bre_2004 — 2021-10-09 17:39:55 UTC

roses are red
violets are blue
i pretend to be dead
to stay away from you
i have all these thoughts
inside of my head
cuz i used to dream of the day that we wed
but now i feel lost
and im so confused
what did i do to make you feel so used
and ya kept second guessin and messin with me
but then i lost you and now my heart bleeds
i never wanted perfection
you weren't messin it up
but its all my fault
and now you've given up
you want to be friends
but that i cant do
i wont sleep tonight
ill be thinkin of you
so roses are red
violets are blue
i pretend to be dead
to keep away from you
i didnt want perfection
you werent messin it up
but its all my fault
and i let us give up
its me and not you
i know thats what they say
but i would chop off my arm
just to make you stay
now i keep second guessin
these thoughts in my head
should i let you go
or try to keep you instead
when i say i love you
do you also love me
i hope you say yes cuz i really believe
our imperfections werent messing things up
and i was a fool to let us give up
i dont wanna be done
could you please come over
come while we're young
we'll grow old together
ill come for you
and ill make it better
my imperfects wont keep messin things up
you are my heart
please dont keep givin up
roses are red
violets are blue
i have been thinkin
i love you....

feelins

Bre_2004 — 2021-11-06 19:16:17 UTC

she loved me
that's what she said
gave her a part of me
and now i feel dead
I thought that she'd be with me
until we were grey and old
but that thought eluded me
and now her love's gone cold
so i stare in the mirror now
and look in my eyes
try to see through the cloud
but after a hundred tries
I still fall speechless
when i see her face
i still feel clueless
when i think of the space
I think that i've fallen
down on this cold, cold ground
and the angels are callin'
and i can hear the sound
but i gotta get up
i aint goin' into the light
cus for the person i love
imma stay and fight

I started to cry at the end lol

Bre_2004 — 2021-11-18 14:42:59 UTC

thinkinggg

Bre_2004 — 2021-11-21 20:39:01 UTC

Bruh when life gets tough

Bre_2004 — 2021-11-21 20:44:25 UTC

Everyone at 18 (Big Redneck Ronda frfr)

Bre_2004 — 2021-11-21 20:44:53 UTC

Its Ya Girlll BREEE

Bre_2004 — 2021-11-21 20:47:26 UTC

TO ALL OUR EXESSS

Bre_2004 — 2021-11-21 20:58:44 UTC

Bre_2004 — 2021-11-26 17:19:26 UTC

How I Died

Bre_2004 — 2021-11-29 15:55:39 UTC

smile at me
through your crooked teeth
as i slowly bleed
to death
and the lies do come
off your snake forked tongue
as i'm running out of breath
we'll have a glass of tea
filled with irony
as my blood is running cold
then my heart stops beating
and I'm not breathing
onto my life I no longer hold
as i'm lying there
and as no one cares
im in a pool of my own blood
and the demons
come up with reasons
that its okay to do what they've done.
But then i come alive
and now i thrive
feeding off the energy
because of all of them
all of the demons
that reside inside of me!
they feed on the pain
driving me insane
while inside the little girl cries
no one can help me
ill just drink my tea
as the little girl slowly dies.

i messed it up a lil bc allergies but there ya go Lexi

Bre_2004 — 2021-11-29 16:06:05 UTC

The Darkness

Bre_2004 — 2021-11-29 16:19:50 UTC

lately i been scared
i been scared of the dark
and the creatures
that hide within
and lately all i know
all i know
is they haunt me
but i wont let them win
they peak through my closet
and underneath my bed
they scratch across my wall
throwing boulders through my window
cutting up my face
making me a disgrace
but i gotta remember to smile
keep up the act
they cant see the monsters
hiding in the dark
be there when they need you
just take it on the chin
don't forget about the monsters
never let them win

Keep me..

Bre_2004 — 2021-11-29 16:33:27 UTC

Keep me in your arms
and never let me go
keep me away from harm
Keep me with you
in the comfort of your care
help me to become unaware
of the demons that watch me
that listen to me
that hurt me every day.
Make me know
that you are here to stay.
Never let me go again
help me to feel stable
cuz in ur arms i fell safe
and i feel like i am able
to face what comes my way
with you by my side
i can chase the monsters away
so please, keep me.

the things we hide..

Bre_2004 — 2021-12-03 20:37:45 UTC

hearts were meant to be stolen
rules were meant to be broken
yet people sip on the dangerous potion
that take away all their emotions

why must they never learn
that people's feelings may turn
and that even though they're unsure
these emotions will most likely burn

but the demons they lurk inside
in the darkest places they'll hide
they're time in there they will bide
until a change of tide

Dear Friend

Bre_2004 — 2022-01-21 13:08:58 UTC

a sleep like death

a death like life

a heart supposed to be kept

then brutally stabbed with a knife

a soul to be released

a spirit yet imprisoned

I think I'd be better diseased

but no one ever listened

sitting on your bedside

waiting for a feeling

but instead I stayed and I cried

because I'd never done the healing

drink my problems away

that's what everyone does

I feel there's no reason to stay?

what about the people I love

Are you there dear friend?

would you bring back the joy inside

I have no one here to care

to be by my side

maybe it would be better if i died

Goodbye

Bre_2004 — 2022-02-08 02:04:59 UTC

in the black of night, where the monsters hide
deep within the shadows where the demons lurk
into her deepest insecurities and most sadistic of desires
get to know the darkness in the corner of her mind
unlock the safe in which she keeps her pain
let the tears crash into you like a tsunami
all of the emotion swirling around you like a destructive tornado
it will break you.. so handle with caution
she fakes her smile on the daily
laughs the realest fake laugh a person could muster
she doesn't want them to worry for her
she recedes into herself and loses the pain
or so she tells herself
every day is turmoil
every day is hell
every day she hopes for a better tomorrow
false optimism
she wants them to see her smile and hear her laugh and think everything is fine
but the truth is
its not
she thinks about ending it
making it go away
she just wants the voice in the back of her mind that tells her she's not good enough
to quiet
you're not worth it
you're not good enough
you will never find someone to love you
they dont care
dont bother them
SHUT UP!
she snaps..
and into the black of the night she goes
lurking with the demons in the shadows
the cuts on her arms
on her legs..
the gash in her lip from when she bites so hard from the nightmares
her body too thin
her lips too white
purple circles around her eyes
and as she looks in the mirror she cries
she wants to find herself but she's too far gone
no one can save her now
people try to save her but she knows its hopeless and she pushes them away
no one can save her
slowly she fades
into the dark
and finally the voice is quite
in fact, everything is
even her
and as she lay still on the cold cement
foam overflowing her parted lips
her face still blue
her eyes open yet empty
people just step over her
because to them
she was nothing
she IS nothing
but as she faded into black
her final thought
at least i'm no longer a burden...

more of your girl

Bre_2004 — 2022-02-09 18:52:21 UTC

even more of ya girl

Bre_2004 — 2022-02-09 18:53:46 UTC

Bre_2004 — 2022-02-09 18:56:12 UTC

me and my little twin

Bre_2004 — 2022-02-09 18:57:53 UTC

Reality Check

Bre_2004 — 2022-02-14 00:41:20 UTC

the weight crushes her
yet she keeps going
the pressure is overwhelming her
yet she marches on
people say things that break her heart
yet she smiles
she wants to cry so bad
but she laughs
she wants to scream loud
yet she stays quiet
they mustn't worry for her
so she puts on a mask
they cant see all the things in her mind
the fact that she twirls knives in her hand and wonders how it would feel the end it
they will never see the things she thinks
when she sees the dealers in her city
they will never know that she wants to scream for help
but she feels it pointless
they will never know
that shes going cold
she wants to die
she wants to be gone
this life is too much for her
yet she keeps a smile on her face
she laughs in their faces
she acts like she is happy
she jumps around
she gets hype
she talks
and plays
but inside
inside...
her heart is broken
shes going insane
she hates herself
so she keeps her chin up
until one day she stands at the window
of her bedroom
on the fourth story of her apartment complex
she puts her feet over the window, sitting on the sill
breathes a sigh of relief as she looks down at the cement
then she pushes herself off
and as she falls, she smiles
for it will all be over
but then she wakes up in her bed
she can still feel the fall
the wind as it pushes through her hair
but shes crying, not smiling
she doesn't want to die!
she wants to live for them
until eventually she wants to live for her too
as she stands staring at herself in her bathroom mirror
she finally sees her value
finally she is sane
her life sucks sure
but she can make the changes
shes is gonna fix it
and she can get the help she needs

Love

Bre_2004 — 2022-02-14 15:32:01 UTC

i can see it
and can feel it
but its just out of reach
come to me..
let me have your beauty
let me have your joy
let me see that after all this time
i can still be happy too
let me see your light
i promise i wont dull it
i just need you, love
your fond embrace
your delightful laugh
beautiful anger
and soft touch
be my bloody valentine
be my peace in chaos
be the thing that cures my soul
and keeps me from harm
i need you, love
more than i'd like to admit
more than is sane
more than i could ever permit
but love, you elude me
you keep running away
and i see everyone else has you
but for me...
you cant be arsed
its okay, ill live without you
the way i was destined to do
keep the lonely feeling
be the cursed disgrace..
i guess i never needed you.

my brother from another mother animated me guys!!

Bre_2004 — 2022-03-08 15:21:15 UTC

Into the Mind of a Broken Girl

Bre_2004 — 2022-03-08 15:42:44 UTC

she watches
she watches everyone around her find what they're looking for
yet she can't find the one thing she wants
the on thing she needs more than anything
the one thing that will help
she's turned
to the darkness, to the light
no one can help
this is her journey and yet, she can't control the mode of travel
she waits
waits for the storm to pass
so she can get through with ease
but it just stays
she needs help...
but she doesn't know how to cry for it
shes been alone
confused
hurt
and she just keeps hurting herself and others
so why not let go
she says its because they don't want her to
so.. what is this?
death while living
has she been hurt so much that she thinks its too late for her?
probably
that's why she always puts them first
throws herself into their problems
shes not crazy
she just cares and doesn't know how else to show it
she tries to fix your problems so she doesn't have to face her own
you're her escape
yeah, she might seem mean and over protective sometimes
but thats just her scars
get to know the beauty inside
forget about the ugly face
get to know who SHE is
help her heal
be there
care.

Bre_2004 — 2022-03-10 17:23:21 UTC

Bre_2004 — 2022-03-16 14:21:37 UTC

no name

Bre_2004 — 2022-03-17 13:04:41 UTC

shes letting go
shes been mentally abused
shouted at
even physically harmed
shes saying goodbye
you cant hurt her anymore
he doesn't know what hes doing to her..
and to be honest
he probably doesn't care
false accusations
unruly consequences
hurtful comments day in and day out
she cant even feel it anymore
shes counting down the seconds till she walks out the door
and never looks back
that's the last he will see of her
the last he will hear
don't speak to me
she will say
don't reach out
your abuse ends here.
it will be her final goodbye

An Unfair Love

Bre_2004 — 2022-03-24 13:12:01 UTC

You get me up in my emotions

I don’t how you do it but you do

I know I drive you every kind of crazy

But what else am i supposed to do

Everything you say

Anything you do

Makes me fall deeper into love with you

My heart tells me to go for it

My mind tells me that it will never work

Theres nothing that I could say

Nothing I could do

That would make you feel the way i do for you

But its okay

Life won’t end

I could never sacrifice a friend

This is just

An unfair love.

Bre_2004 — 2022-03-29 19:18:06 UTC

Bre_2004 — 2022-03-29 19:22:25 UTC

nameless

Bre_2004 — 2022-04-12 19:27:22 UTC

she cares for him

though she's too shy to say it

so he will never know

he is oblivious to how he feels

and that's how its going to stay

it never bothers him because

he never knew in the first place

but their trust runs deep

deeper than the grand canyon

they rely on each other

when one breaks

the other comes with duct tape in hand

when one falls

the other helps them to stand

and though they are much the same

they are basically polar opposites

cause she cares for him

But he isn't shy at all

he makes sure he knows

so she that she doesn't have to feel alone

and that's how its going to stay

because she knows that having him in her life

helps her every day.

i love this pic (NO FILTER!!)

Bre_2004 — 2022-04-12 19:29:05 UTC

she gettin it

Bre_2004 — 2022-04-18 15:44:38 UTC

Bre_2004 — 2022-04-18 15:45:11 UTC

boyz like u

Bre_2004 — 2022-04-29 22:42:42 UTC

Bre_2004 — 2022-04-29 23:09:02 UTC

Bre_2004 — 2022-04-29 23:12:57 UTC

Bre_2004 — 2022-04-29 23:21:27 UTC

📹

Bre_2004 — 2022-04-29 23:26:32 UTC

Bre_2004 — 2022-05-23 01:30:28 UTC

hehe for muh British Bestie

Bre_2004 — 2022-05-23 01:31:13 UTC

No

Bre_2004 — 2023-02-11 18:53:28 UTC

He always told her no
he said shed never go
he was going to hold her back
but all she wanted was to grow
all he wanted was control
which is what he never got
she was never going to fold
his games were getting old
theres one thing he didnt know
one thing she never shared
that word no..
it would never make her feel that she cant
cant go into the world on her own
and face anything that comes.
make her grow crawl into a hole
and feel like giving up.
she always kept her chin held high
walking with confidence
he'd never see her cry
because she knows
shes got this

Bre_2004 — 2023-04-19 18:38:43 UTC

she stays to herself
but she craves attention
she wants them to know her
wants them to love her
but they don't
she talks too much
socially awkward
she jokes too much
she's pretty
but that's not enough
she has a beautiful personality
but they don't see
she wants to help with their problems
she wants no one to suffer
she doesnt know what to do anymore