First I researched clowns and their part to do in horror as many people are scared of clowns and they are used in many movies and TV shows.... so I also researched into ‘the joker’ and American horror story to further my research in clowns. I didn’t really find something I would want to move forward with so I started researching into real life horror and things to do with the psychology of killers... I did some research on the two boys who killed a little boy and my thoughts on the situation. Then I went on to find out things about a serial killer and what he did to people it was horrific what I found. After this I looked into mythological creatures as I really liked the idea of doing something to do with medusa, I had gotten this idea from Ronnie ray Mendez an artist I did some work on he had done a stippling of Medusa and I did the same and loved the outcome. This was the first time I had done a stippling drawing and I really liked the outcome. This is when I knew I wanted to do a stippling drawing for my final piece. I also looked into Greek gods and liked the idea of two different animals merging together to form one. 

 

I went to the national history museum and took pictures of different animals with horns as I find them scary and in some psychological TV shows - like ‘Hannibal’ they used animals with horns like bulls and deer and they were used symbolically to portray horror. I did some experiments with paint linked to this. I also looked into symbolism and how it related to artist’s work. At the museum I also found a 3D skull that also linked to my theme so I took some pictures of it at different angles. At this point I really tried to think about where I wanted to take my theme and what I wanted the meaning to be behind it. 

 

So I decided to make it more about me and what I am scared of. I wrote the question- “what are you scared of” on a piece of paper and asked different people to write on it. I got different answers from everyone there was one about being scared of big things, and it makes you wonder why? I liked this. So then I decided to write what makes me scared and i found it quite weird actually writing it down. This is when I knew that I wanted to make my final piece about a fear of my own. Death. Not my death! But a loved one... I am scared of losing the people that I love, it is inevitable but it is a fear that I cannot ever overcome and I found that very powerful to do as a final piece. 

 

For my final piece I started by taking pictures of my sister with a scared expression on her face. I also had my sister take pictures of me looking scared too. I thought about how I could portray death so I looked through my book and found my skull pictures and thought it would go with the whole concept behind the project. Instead of doing my sisters face I did the skull and this piece was about her being scared of her own death I thought that piece on its own would look very simple so then I thought of doing myself as a stippling. The meaning behind this is that I want to not confront my fears but accept them- my fear being losing a loved one so the piece of me looking scared looks at the other stippling of the skull and it’s me being scared of my sister dying. Overall, the thing I want people to see is that the fear of ‘death’ is an endless cycle - I’m scared of my loved one dying and they are scared of death and it goes in a circle, it’s something everyone experiences in their lifetime. I think this is a powerful message as most people live their lives with this fear and it stops them from just living life and enjoying it as they are always dwelling on it. Hopefully the audience will see this when they look at the pieces at the exhibition. 

 

To make my piece better I could have made more pieces to do with different fears that I and many people have like the fear of spiders and fear of being in confined spaces. This could be to show what the meaning behind everything is more clearly and to show how it’s all about fear. I only did two pieces because I ran out of time in the end. All in all, I really liked doing this project and liked the outcome of it.