This painting is of my mother, a civil rights activist, emulating Amy Sherald’s style with a coloured background and direct gaze. I based it off a photo from Delano magazine: I wanted an image where she was posing to echo famous portraits of influential women. I used acrylic (my favourite medium) to be able to apply harsh contrasts with a range of colour and tone,  and used a large canvas to make her character more powerful.

This painting of my paternal grandmother (cradling my uncle) was inspired by family photos. I did it in acrylic in sepia tones to emulate an older, worn photograph, while keeping close to the black and white aspect of the actual photo. This piece was also inspired by Sherald’s work, here focusing on her greyscale skin tones, without washing out the complexion. I chose to do it much smaller because I wanted to create a more intimate picture.

Clare ‘Oom (October 2018)

Mixed media

Three lamps creating a juxtaposition between nature and mechanical elements of society. Inspired by Martin Boyce, Martin Kippenberger, and Narnia’s iconic ‘Spare Oom’, it is a whimsical commentary on preserving nature and its evolution alongside machines, while creating a reflective environment for the viewer. The exposition space is meant to be interactive with the audience. The title is a play on the French word for light and “Spare ‘Oom” from Narnia.

sino estelas en la mar.” Antonio Machado
This painting serves as a snapshot of a memory. Suffering from an anxiety attack, this visual grounded me, and stuck with me. This piece is clearly a seascape, but not based off a photo to maintain a roughness (highlighted by raw brush strokes and thickness of paint) for the final product. 

The title comes from a quote I was told during that time, which resonated and calmed me, meaning “wakes in the sea”.

 Acrylic Paint, 

160x100cm

Mental health is an important topic to me; this dramatised portrayal helps me visualise what it feels like in the harder moments. It was stylistically inspired by the Persepolis graphic novel, Lee Krasner and Jackson Pollock (who both reference mental illness). The lyrics tie into my other works. The large canvas is to isolate and drown the figure out. The title comes from Halsey’s album, (Manic) which discusses mental health a lot.

Heart on the Left (November 2019)

Acrylic paint
50 x 60cm 

Citizenship is vital to my identity, and having recently obtained my fourth, I wanted to honour and show what that means to me: choices, and opportunities, but has also confusion in deciding who I am. The ace represents my sexuality. The hand was inspired by Lucian Freud’s iconic style for skin using vivid colours and textures. The title is a book written by my great-grandfather about his own personal and political views.

 This is my first self-portrait. It is monochromatic to emulate Marta, which is also a snapshot of the past, and because the photograph was monochromatic. For the skin-tone, I again studied Amy Sherald’s greyscale art, but chose to omit any colour background, to keep it like the black and white photo it’s based off of. The title furthers the theme of identity and growth which the self-portraits show. 

Show Yourself (March 2020)
Acrylic paint
100x120cm 

My final piece is a self portrait of me now to mirror the other self-portrait and show how all the different people and experiences have made me who I am, tying all my previous work together. Like the other portraits, it was inspired by Sherald’s work, in this case reversely: grey background and clothing with lots of colour in the face. The title is a song where the protagonist realises that she is her own life’s purpose and saviour. 

This installation was inspired by the numerous songs called ‘Breathe’ (or something similar) which I find ground me and help me with my stress. Making it interactive with the viewer was intentional to have them be able to step into the space and be surrounded by the ethereal fabric and music, reading the lyrics from the songs which inspired it. The music playing is an instrumental song, You Get To Exhale Now by Rob Simonsen, which inspires relief in me.

Lyrics connect my works. I feel the strongest familial connections through music, to my mother (Fiona), grandmother (Marta), and father (Heart on the Left). Music helps me cope with stress, and, as I tend to focus most on the lyrics, using them to ground me, incorporating them into my pieces works well. Mostly, I used the lyrics as finer details. In Fiona, I included lyrics from my mother’s favourite songs, focusing on lyrics that reminded me of her character. Estelas had two lyrics hidden in the waves which relate to the title (and alternate title). Heart’s lyrics show my confusion surrounding my nationalities whilst (Manic) uses lyrics more as an essential element of the painting.

I also explored the effect of a piece’s size on the audience; the portraits range in size between Marta (29.5 x 23.5cm), and Show Yourself (100x120cm) (Fiona is 100x70cm). (Manic) is(160x100cm)  the largest painting. Marta is small and intimate, drawing the viewer in. Fiona creates a more imposing effect, showing the importance and power I associate with my mother; Show Yourself is also large and the portrait is cropped closer, but the pose is more inviting and vulnerable to the viewer. (Manic) has a different effect from its size: having the figure be so small, drowned out by the rest of the painting isolates her, creating a more sombre mood. 

My installations are all interactive, and big enough to walk through, creating an inviting effect for the viewer. Martin Kippenberger and Olaf Eliasson provided inspiration as both create interactive installations in which the viewer immerses themselves. The exhibition layout was very intentional. Unsafe Neighbourhood is in a separate room, as it has to be closed off from light. The rest of the exhibit is a specific path from Breathe moving along the abstract paintings to the portraits, through Unsafe Neighbourhood before ending with my final piece, Show Yourself. I wanted it to be a specific path which started at my fears (Breathe, Estelas) and insecurities (Heart and (Manic)), before it delved into my past through my family and memories (Fiona, Childhood and Marta). By taking the viewer through Unsafe Neighbourhood they then see the newer insecurities I’m facing in terms of mental health, before ending with the self-portrait of who I am now, as an amalgamation of them all.

The portraits were heavily inspired by Amy Sherald, whether it be paint style, posture and straight-on gaze of her subjects, or colour-blocked backgrounds which are common in my work. I explored Lee Krasner and Jackson Pollock for (Manic) for their abstract and aggressive but emotive work, for the background of the painting. I investigated Lucian Freud for Heart on the Left for his particular approach to vivid skintones for the hand. My confidence in painting has been supported by looking closely at their attention to detail. Their iconic styles and mark-making techniques are ones I investigated and emulated, manipulating the media more forcefully.

I developed a careful consideration of portraiture throughout the course, and further investigated how more abstract elements could help me create a clearer representation of myself. Overall, this exhibit discusses many different aspects of my identity: how I see myself, who made me who I am, and the insecurities I’ve faced. I hoped that by so openly displaying my insecurities it could help validate others’ similar feelings, and allow them the chance to discover their more positive traits. I used symbolism like lyrics and family to create conduits for emotions I couldn’t easily express before tackling my final pieces: I Am My Childhood and Show Yourself, which show how I’ve developed with those influences into who I am now.