P1Commentary - Scores, Tips & Tops by Goff, MJ (Meghan) https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe P1Commentary Student Ex.2, Scores Tips & Tops en-us 2021-03-10 13:44:07 UTC 2024-07-15 13:23:13 UTC hello@padlet.com Paper 1 example 2 Luke https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292946501 tips
* provide more examples in certain areas  such as:
- talks about an illustration evoking a feeling of mystery without explaining why.
- states enthousiastic tone and opinion on page 5 without explaination
* proof read your text to eliminate grammar mistakes
* Pick up on more literary devices such as an alliteration underneath the title.
* sometimes talks about primary and secondairy purpose without stating what this is.
* comment on 3 types of modes of persuation:
- ethos when talking about author (tourist website / native)
- logos when talking about what the author writes about the benefits of tasmania

tops
* good use of signal words (such as, furthermore)
*well planned text, structured
* very clear language
* picks up on a lot of stylistic devices

criterion A: level 4
criterion B: level 5
criterion C: level 4
criterion D: level 3 (informal word choice, grammar)]]> 2021-03-10 14:06:25 UTC https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292946501 Nienke 569358 https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292950005 Tops:
- had a good detailed plan of what they were going to write
- good structure, with words such as 'first,' 

Tips:
- Give examples when talking about the tone, when saying the author provides facts, and when saying that the author uses their opinion multiple times
-  Reread the text, to eliminate mistakes

Score: 
A: 3
B: 3
C: 5
D: 3]]> 2021-03-10 14:07:01 UTC https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292950005 Sanne https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292951581 Tops:
  • Made an outline of their commentary at the beginning
  • Wrote a clear thesis
  • Uses a good structure, saying "First" and "To conclude"
 
 
Tips: 
  • Some minor vocab mistakes (by using images), maybe reread your text. 
  • Give examples when saying "The tone is very enthusiastic"

A = Level 3
B = Level 3
C = Level 5
D = Level 3/4
 
]]> 2021-03-10 14:07:16 UTC https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292951581 Stein https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292951806 Tips:
More examples from the text should be used.
The student should pay a little bit more attention to language.

Tops:
The student planned the way to write their anwser very well

3
4
5
3]]> 2021-03-10 14:07:18 UTC https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292951806 Pelle https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292952075 The student has an extensive planning on the top which is great and means that the student thought about the structure & content before starting to write the actual commentary. Additionally, the student started most paragraphs with a signal word (First, to conclude etc) which improves the flow of the text.
Lots of stylistic devices were mentioned. However, the student should use more examples to support her arguments/statements).

Scoring:
3, 4, 4, 3 (A, B, C, D)]]> 2021-03-10 14:07:21 UTC https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292952075 paper 1 example 2 https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292953889 tips: 
- give more examples in areas like when the author talked about an image providing a feeling without explanation
- read over the text to correct grammar mistakes

tops:
- well used signal words
- used many stylistic devices
- easy to understand language

A: level 4
B: level 4
C: level 4
D: level 3 (informal language, grammar)]]> 2021-03-10 14:07:38 UTC https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292953889 paper 1 example 2 https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292956015 Tops:
-made a clear planning for their commentary.
-Good structure in general.

Tips:
-Use more examples from the text to support the thesis.
-Pay more attention to vocabulary.

A: level 4
B: level 3
C; level 5
D; level 3

-Berit]]> 2021-03-10 14:07:59 UTC https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292956015 Paper 1 example 2 https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292956554 Top = The person made good use of a planning scheme. He mentioned some bullet points per paragraph in which they explained what he wanted tot talk about.

Tip = more examples from the text could be used.

Score:
A = 4
B = 3
C = 4
D = 3
Jason]]> 2021-03-10 14:08:04 UTC https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292956554 Bas https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292956895 Score:
A: Level 3
B: Level 4
C: Level 5
D: Level 3

Tops:
Good organized with a structured plan

Tips:
spelling, grammar
]]> 2021-03-10 14:08:07 UTC https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292956895 https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292973548 2021-03-10 14:10:52 UTC https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292973548 https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292973806 2021-03-10 14:10:55 UTC https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292973806 Paper 1 example 2 (Biko) Tops: -Clear and activating use of language, really catches the attention of the reader. -Variating stylistic devices are used properly.-Structure is correctly utilised. Tips: -Minor grammar mistakes, maybe double-check the text. -Examples aren’t always provided when explaining tone. Score: A=3 B=4 C=4 D=3 https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292982332 2021-03-10 14:12:20 UTC https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292982332 Paper 1 Example 2 https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292983825 2021-03-10 14:12:34 UTC https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292983825 criterion A: level 3 criterion B: level 5 criterion C: level 4 criterion D: level 3 584828 https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292985433
tips; 
- give more specific examples
- proof reading

tops; 
- A good planning scheme; well structured
- good use of signal words ]]> 2021-03-10 14:12:49 UTC https://padlet.com/mgoff24/1sqw5k1rg6u57ebe/wish/1292985433