Jay's 50th Birthday by https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl Please share a memory or story about Jay en-us 2020-08-13 20:47:07 UTC 2026-02-27 20:45:44 UTC hello@padlet.com Jay at 13, a Bar Mitzvah memory! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/680879836 2020-08-14 19:13:25 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/680879836 Jay at 6 months, my first born! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/680882979 2020-08-14 19:15:36 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/680882979 A "mom" memory https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/680889872 2020-08-14 19:20:41 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/680889872 Happy Birthday Jay! Thanks for letting me help you celebrate the big 5-0! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/681199623 2020-08-15 02:15:44 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/681199623 Happy Birthday to on of my favorite people in the world. Because of your work on the water compact Montana is going to be a better place. Thanks for being awesome and I don't think your dumb but I do think your tough. Again, happy birthday. Come see us. susanlakemt https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/681257943 Susan Lake]]> 2020-08-15 04:58:05 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/681257943 I want to recall a particularly bright time that Jay manufactured nearly single-handedly when all around seemed dark and gloomy.It was during one of the many intervals when pain and sickness invaded and threatened to overcome the house on Oakes Avenue. Becky was not long out of hospital and, I am certain, not long before the next round of it, and there it was Christmas, and we had been invited to spend it with the Stanfel/Weiners.Jay proceeded to do everything that holiday deserves. He bought firewood, he split it with an axe he’d procured for the purpose, he fought with the fireplace to make it burn, he acquired a Christmas tree and accomplished much of its decorating, he loaded stockings with interesting and useful items – I continue to use the razor and the midget screwdriver for opening battery compartments.While it was not a holiday celebration he was accustomed to staging, he made it not only a fine, uplifting one, but one of the best and most joyful Christmases in the long annals of his mother- and father-in-law.In the years I have known Jay, I’ve witnessed countless good, selfless, and self-sacrificing deeds, but this one always comes first to my mind and makes me happy and grateful that he is a part of our family.Happy Birthday, Jay! Meister https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/681508520 2020-08-15 19:50:15 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/681508520 Happy Birthday, Jay! Knowing and working with you has been a joy, amigo! You've got the intellect, the passion, the persistence and the sense of humor to do crazy western water work! and what a treat to learn several years ago of your connection to Adam Szubin! what a great family you all have! Be safe and well, and keep up the good work for many more years to come! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/681550690 Steve Moore

]]> 2020-08-15 21:54:15 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/681550690 Looking forward to celebrating with you https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/682051252 2020-08-17 00:17:21 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/682051252 Supak Sone https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/682143529 Happy birthday 🎊🎉🎂 Jay. 
We are miss u from Thailand 🇹🇭 ]]> 2020-08-17 02:23:50 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/682143529 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/682638130 SENDING YOU MUCH LOVE AND BEST WISHES  FOR THIS NEW DECADE FROM BOSTON!
Cousins Tess and Archy]]> 2020-08-17 13:19:27 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/682638130 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/683052228 Happy Birthday, Jay! ]]> 2020-08-17 16:03:17 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/683052228 Happy Birthday Jay https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/683176481 It took nearly your lifetime to get CSKT to settle.  Great work.  It's great to have you back at DNRC ]]> 2020-08-17 16:46:15 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/683176481 I love that small world stories brought you and your wonderful family into our lives! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/683499089 We have meaningful memories of hosting you three for Passover seder, and are so grateful for our time together.
Happy, happy birthday!
With love,
Bob, Sarah, Jacob & Max]]> 2020-08-17 18:38:29 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/683499089 Happy Birthday Jay https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/683991037 I count myself lucky to have had a chance to get to know you and work with you.  I am continually impressed with your knowledge and passion.  Thank you for making our fight your fight.  Have a wonderful birthday, enjoy your day, enjoy your family.  

Roberta Frost

]]> 2020-08-18 00:29:21 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/683991037 Happy Birthday Uncle Jay! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/684911254 My favorite memory of being with you was when we watched the Super Bowl after Andrew's Bar Mitzvah. We were nervous that the Patriots might lose. They were down 28-3. Then they came back with an incredible win. We were all so excited and celebrating and cheering for a while. I hope we can do that again! 
Love, Dovi]]> 2020-08-18 14:29:01 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/684911254 Happy birthday Uncle Jay! 🥳 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/685020967 Here is the cake I painted for you. Love, Ezra]]> 2020-08-18 15:03:16 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/685020967 Happy Birthday Uncle Jay! 🥳 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/685028607 Love, Ezra]]> 2020-08-18 15:05:51 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/685028607 Happy Birthday, Jay! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/685228418 Welcome to the BIG 5-0 CLUB!  We've come a long way from getting your Dad to drive us to Worcester for an Iron Maiden concert in 1984!  We may be a little older, a little mellower, and perhaps a tad wiser (although not enough so to impress my kids), but you are still the same great guy that welcomed me to Newton all of those years ago.  Although we are distant and don't connect nearly as often as I'd like, I am delighted that we have remained friends all these many years and that you have retained all of the wonderful qualities that made you such a valuable friend back then.  I'm sure we'll find a way to celebrate in person when the world settles back down, but in the meantime, consider this a virtual Happy Birthday toast and have one for me, your elder mentor in the BIG 5-0 CLUB (by 4 months).

Phil Chase]]> 2020-08-18 16:07:07 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/685228418 Happy Birthday https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/685639056 I have chosen to include pictures of the beginning of an eternal love between our daughter, Rebecca, and Jay.  They met at Berkeley where both were students; and to summarize his words of toast to her at their marriage dinner, “She beat my ass in each and every athletic challenge we tried, and for that I love her more.”        
The first picture is from their wedding shower.  Look closely at the picture, and you will see her crutches on the left. Just days before, in a family touch football game on the beach she destroyed her knee.  Jay was her caregiver and therapy coach until they were able to travel home. The second picture is of their beautiful wedding where a priest and a rabbi joined them in marriage.  The third picture is a year later, where their young love is still glowing.  Five years later, Rebecca was diagnosed with Sarcoidosis, an autoimmune disease.  Thanks to Rebecca’s disease, life has not been easy for them, but that glow is still there, and their athletic adventures still abound. 
One night, during a difficult hospital stay, Jay returned home late from the hospital where the doctors were unsure how to treat the disease. That day he dealt with the doctors, his hospitalized wife, a work crisis, and fought the health insurance company.  Their little son, Andrew, was asleep, and Jay looked exhausted and down.  I offered him a glass of wine, and while we sat in silence, he looked at me and, instead of rehashing the day, said, “Mom, we cannot thank you enough for being here.  I promise you, I will always be there for you.  With all the problems weighing on him, he thought of me.  That is true love.  Thank you, dear son.  Happy Birthday.
Much love, Mom

]]> 2020-08-18 18:10:18 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/685639056 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/685680015 Wedding Shower]]> 2020-08-18 18:23:23 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/685680015 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/685683009 Marriage Ceremony]]> 2020-08-18 18:24:22 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/685683009 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/685687202 Early Marriage]]> 2020-08-18 18:25:45 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/685687202 Happy Birthday, Jay https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/687086582 Jay and I worked together as the attorneys for the Reserved Water Rights Compact Commission.  The Commission staff always considered Jay the baby of the group and now he's turning 50 ! Happy Birthday Jay and congratulations on making the rest of us feel ancient.
Rebecca requested we share some stories since we are unable to gather in celebration. Jay and I worked together for years - in fact, we still do on occasion. As Chris Tweeten once said, "the Compact Commission is the Hotel California of jobs, you can check out anytime you'd like, but you can never leave." So many memories, but here are a few.
Anne Yates hated working as an attorney for the Commission so much that she moved upstairs to work on personnel issues to escape.  Lucky for me Jay applied for this position.  When Jay first started this job he must have thought he had signed on to work with a complete idiot that always had a confused look on her face.  The truth was - I was confused! Jay talked so DAMN FAST I only got about a third of what he was saying. SO MUCH ENERGY! Eventually his machine gun pace slowed enough for us normal folk to keep up.
I do recall waiting for Jay in Sun Valley for a conference one late October night.  It just so happened that the Red Sox had made it to the World Series that year. Picture Jay in a State car hurling over Monida Pass at breakneck speeds in the pitch black desperately searching for a radio station. The Sox won and Jay arrived safely - two miracles in one night.
Jay and I worked well together and supported each others' projects. We would often brainstorm a solution to a problem. The tricky part of our job was not just coming up with solutions in negotiations, but making someone else - a Commission member, an agency leader, or even the opposing party - think the proposed solution was their idea to begin with. Jay was masterful at this. As a result Jay graciously let others take the credit for successful projects where he put in the bulk of the work.
Jay, you should be very proud of all you have accomplished in your career.  And you should be even more proud of the life you've built here in Helena. A life rich in family and friends.  You have to be the most dedicated husband and father on the planet - if not, you are certainly on the leader board. Jerry and I wish you all the best.  The future is bright. Happy Birthday.
Cheers, Faye]]> 2020-08-19 14:03:22 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/687086582 We love you, Uncle Jay https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/687307706 Happy birthday to a wonderful brother, brother-in-law, and uncle (and you're not too shabby as a husband, father, and lawyer). We love eating Ethiopian food with you in DC. Thank you for always being there to help us understand the Indian territory situation in Little House on the Prairie, water rights in Montana, and Supreme Court cases involving the tribes. And thank you for showing us all how to deal with adversity with grace, good humor, and obsessive amounts of exercise. We love you very much. ]]> 2020-08-19 15:12:54 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/687307706 Siblings (2009) https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/687437464 2020-08-19 15:51:30 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/687437464 Siblings (2020) https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/687439938 2020-08-19 15:52:18 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/687439938 Happy Birthday Jay! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/688373319 My birthday is on the 21st! Cheers to the both of us! Hope you have a good one! I am honored and privileged to work with such a great team member.  You help make up for my  communication deficiencies and readily grasp the science that we inundate you with.  I am amazed at your ability to crank out legal documents and testimonies on tight deadlines with little or no sleep. Thanks for making my job easier in transferring science information to support legal arguments.
Mark Buettner]]> 2020-08-19 22:34:50 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/688373319 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/688465944 Happy Birthday Jay!
I love this picture of my Montana family, even if it was taken in California. You both look so happy, and so tired ❤️
My memories of time spent with you and Rebecca, and later of Andrew, slogging up mountains and long, dusty drives to get there, are some of my most cherished.  Thank you for always welcoming me into your home with fine food and so much laughter.  And for always leaving a nightlight on so I could find my way up the stairs to the bathroom.  I miss you guys.  Next time you find yourself on the trail with Rebecca, think of me trailing along behind with the terrier in her sling, whining  “how much father?!?,” while also wanting it to go on forever.  Enjoy 50!  I am right behind you!]]> 2020-08-20 00:07:07 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/688465944 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/689975094 Jay - Happy 50th! My time working with you on the Compact Commission where some of the most memorable of the 36 years I worked for DNRC. I was always amazed and impressed with your ability to present incredible arguments to adverse audiences with such poise. Your knowledge and recall of legal and technical details are incredible. And you were a fun guy to be around. I feel honored to have had the chance to work with you. Here's to health and happiness as you launch into your 6th decade. When we get thru this Covid mess, give me a call when you get to Missoula and I'll buy you a beer or two.
With the highest regard,
Bill Schultz]]> 2020-08-20 17:45:38 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/689975094 To Jay on his 50th sweiner65 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/690512210 It has been quite the ride with you. Newton, Philadelphia, India, Bennigans, Spaghetti Freddie, Berkeley, Oakland, Montana, Palau (PPP!!), Sacramento, Montana, Azores, Little Bighorn, Glacier, Yosemite. And, much more importantly, Rebecca and Andrew.   Experiencing your thirst for adventure, your love of travel, your intellectual curiosity, your sense of humor (perverse as it may be) your devotion to family, your kindness, your grace, your sensitivity, even your love for the Patriots, has given us so much pleasure for all these years, and we look forward to many more.  It’s been so much fun.  But so much more than just fun. We are quite proud of you.
Love, Dad and Don]]> 2020-08-20 21:50:55 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/690512210 Jay and Grandma Esther who adored him! sweiner65 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/690552884 Celebrating her 100th. And to think that she was just twice as old as you are now!
Love, Dad and Don]]> 2020-08-20 22:30:18 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/690552884 Greeting on your 50th sweiner65 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/690563973 From old friends]]> 2020-08-20 22:42:03 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/690563973 Happy birthday Brother/Uncle Jay! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/691169310 Happy 50th to the guy who got me really drunk for the first time (visiting you in law school), who used me to make sure the bathroom didn't smell like pot, who moved back into my bedroom after I finally thought I had a room to myself, who taught me how to spit into the kitchen sink, and who taught me to eat quickly because if I didn't someone else at the table (ahem) would gobble everything up and then lick the plate before you got a chance to finish. And who also modeled for me how to deal with adversity, how to show love and patience through trying times, how to raise a son, how to have fun with your nephews, and how to be an amazing husband, father, and brother. We love you a lot. Happy birthday!]]> 2020-08-21 12:11:47 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/691169310 Happy birthday Jay! We wish you good health, joy, personal and professional growth and satisfaction and decades and decades more opportunities to bring to those you love and the bigger world your compassion, character and strength. We love you very much and wish we could convey these wishes in person! Love, Mom and Pops https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/691239894 2020-08-21 13:00:34 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/691239894 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/691300792 2020-08-21 13:30:25 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/691300792 Happy Birthday, Jay! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/691445227 2020-08-21 14:26:51 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/691445227 Happy Birthday, Jay! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/691446298 Congratulations on the golden anniversary of your birth!  If you’re like most, this is one milestone you’d probably prefer to have out there in the distant future.  Don’t worry, though, as someone with seven years of experience in his 50’s, I can attest that the initial depression does eventually fade and the next biggie becomes the larger concern…

I’ve always enjoyed our visits over the years, from California to Alabama, Washington and Montana, and have admired your enduring dedication to your wife (my little sister), son, family, fitness and values.  You’ve always remained true to the person you were when I first met you, including your questionable allegiances to certain professional sports teams and political parties.  Your energy and enthusiasm never seem to wane, and I'm pretty confident that you’ve got another strong 50 in you!

I wish I could violate the 6 foot rule, shake your hand, give you a big brother-in-law hug and participate in a joyful chorus of “Happy Birthday to You,” but in 2020 that would make me a potential vector, so this virtual greeting will have to do.

I found and attached a photo of you and Beck from almost exactly 20 years ago, which happily for you was before my condo purchase and subsequent trials up the driveway of doom.   Thank you for not suing our Association over the loss of your bumper.  If it’s any consolation, after Mai Lin broke her elbow on that very hill last year I came to agree with your position on this one issue.  

On behalf of all the Republican Cowboys fans, Happy 50th Birthday (aka the 20th Anniversary of your 30th Birthday), Jay!

Ken]]> 2020-08-21 14:27:14 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/691446298 Happy big birthday big brother! rabbiweiner1 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/691572534 Though we have lived far apart for so long, there is not enough space here to express the role you have played in my life, and the way you have made me who I am.  When I describe our early relationship to others I sometimes refer to you as "my tyrant, my god," and I hope you take that with all of the reverence, fear, trembling, and love with which it is intended.  You were everything an older brother is supposed to be.  You wailed on me and bullied me, sometimes, called me "leadfoot" when I wouldn't move for a ground ball, taught me how to drive stick, helped me manage other formative coming of age experiences that will go unnamed here, defended me and cared for me when I needed it, taught me the phrase "morbid fixations" after you got busted stealing a pack of Chewels from the Heartland, and took me to Rick's in Newton Center to look at the dirty magazines.  In more recent years, even from far away, I have come to admire so deeply your intense moral compass and your devotion to your family.  I still look up to you in many ways, and want to be like you when I grow up.  You are the trailblazer, and here you are blazing another trail, with all of us hoping to follow you, god willing, in years of health and fulfillment to come.  Elise, Efraim, and Batya join me in sending you our love and our best wishes for a happy birthday, and a glorious and non-decrepit new decade of life!

love, Ben]]> 2020-08-21 15:13:39 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/691572534 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692030490 In celebration of 50 years around the sun.
Greetings to my co-counsel and friend. I have been honored to share in your good work over many years, Jay. Your attention to detail and structure in a forever agreement while never loosing sight of the spirit of the negotiations will forever benefit all the people of Montana. Yet more compelling I have seen in you a dedication to your family and their care. Your early morning dashes to Missoula or Polson or Cut Bank for meetings and the late night drives, often over icy roads, to get back home to care for Andrew and Rebecca, never shirking your duty to either noble cause. I celebrate all you have done for all of us.   BUT...I am nonetheless shocked to realize that as you turn 50, I am 25 years your senior. Live it up, Jay. Much love and birthday wishes. Candy West]]> 2020-08-21 17:49:19 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692030490 Birthday Greetings! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692182476 A lot of love to you on your 50th birthday. It seems like just yesterday that we met you in Berkeley. We hope someday we will be close enough to visit often. Meanwhile we enjoy following your family life, thanks Rebecca!, and so appreciate knowing you are part of our extended family. Happy Birthday to a very dear cousin, Love Sonia, Bill, and Nicolas (and Emmeli)]]> 2020-08-21 18:45:37 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692182476 Happy Birthday Jay! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692529535 Best wishes for a great weekend and 50+ more to come...]]> 2020-08-21 22:32:07 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692529535 Found a candid shot... https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692531634 Jay during his epic drive a few years back from Boston, to New York, to Helena in a convertible!]]> 2020-08-21 22:35:14 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692531634 Happy Half Decade Jay! seanfrisco https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692532565 My, that went by fast, huh... And to think we've known each other for 31 of those years. [mind.blown.] 

Of course, many of my fondest memories w/Jay have ended up being boozier/fuzzier recollections of those events. Like celebrating July 4th in Jerusalem at some acquaintance of a connection's apartment. Where we cheated death by pounding an entire bottle of Absolut & jumping up & down to the lyrics of Talking Head's 'Psycho Killer'. Over and over again. Those poor innocent bystanders. The bemused looks we received the next day from folks we didn't even really know/recall was the shamed cherry on top. (Hey. At least I remember the locals celebrated by tying Brillo pads to wires, setting them on fire and spinning them in circles as impromptu fireworks. Can you!?)

Another: Jay had been raving for a while about how wild GWAR's live shows were. So we jumped at the chance. At Avalon on Landsdowne in Boston I believe. 91/92? I took to heart Jay's sage advice: "Wear clothing & shoes you *never* wanna wear again." With the faux bodily fluid phantasmagoria that generously issued from the stage, this was a very wise call. Even our eyeballs were stained fake blood red. (This might've been a Bad Contact Lens Evening for you, yeah. Ouchie) I have an image of us eating cheap slices of pizza in Kenmore Square afterwards, reveling in the post-trauma death metal game show. Also while conveniently letting our heads-to-toes dry out.

I trust that Jay's uncanny ability to fall asleep *anywhere* has only ramped up, given this milestone? Past examples: During a screening of 'Sex, Lies & Videotape"; atop an amplifier - yet again in Kenmore Square - at the beloved Rat. (Jay: I think that was the TAD & Therapy? show); any bus or train ride w/in 7 minutes.

Jay: Sincerely gratitude for so many decades of thoughtful friendship. It's always meant a lot. Especially fond memories of the many many Friday night Shabbat dinners you & your family generously included me. (Selfishly, I do miss your mom's cooking too.) And thanks for being such a fellow music and live show junky. And introducing me to much amazing music I might otherwise not have made the effort to explore. Oh yeah: Including drunkenly bulldozing our way to the front of the stage for Eric Clapton in Jerusalem. As only shameless 19 & 20 year olds are capable of doing. Yikes. Hiking in Yosemite & including my twin brother in the invite. (He still mentions it.) Or the scenic and fun road trip across Montana - photographing post offices and checking in at the dot on the map's one (of course, dive) bar. Or when you & Bec finally met my parents & pets for a visit to my deluxe Woburn home. I recall guiding you back to the Lexington exit in my car ahead of you both, while my spazzy Doberman stuck her head out the window to 'bite the air'. Ha. :-)

I have no doubt you will raise a celebratory cocktail and/or beer in celebration tomorrow. And I plan to raise a toast to here in San Francisco as well. Cheers to both sides of the Five-Oh!

Love,

Sean]]> 2020-08-21 22:36:37 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692532565 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692596872 Happy birthday Jay! I hope your 50th year is filled joy and humor!
Love,
Anna]]> 2020-08-22 00:16:28 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692596872 Happy Birthday Jay !! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692651881 We’ve celebrated quite a few of our four birthdays together over the years often collectively since you, Becca, and Dave all came to bless this earth in the month of August.  These celebrations almost never occur on the exact date, take place in lots of different places, including Washington DC, Alabama, and Montana, and involve all sorts of people.  I got a green bean salad recipe from your Mom at your 30th birthday party in Helena, and you got a wrecked car in Big Sky from the monumental feat you and Becca pulled off for my 40th.  But these parties all got their start at Cha Am Restaurant on Shattuck Avenue in Berkeley, California on August 23, 1997 where some family and friends surprised two people we loved – Rebecca and Jay - with a party – a couple of cakes – one of them a joint birthday cake.  At that time, I barely knew you.  I trusted my sister’s assessment that you were someone special.  I certainly could not anticipate the many ways I would come to appreciate you, in the ensuing years, as friend, brother-in-law, husband, and Dad.  So, with the same enthusiasm as that afternoon in Berkeley but with a good deal more love, Happy 50th Birthday Jay !!  Love, Kip

]]> 2020-08-22 01:59:04 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692651881 Happy 50th Birthday Jay !! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692672169 We wish you many more exhilarating trails with lots of tasty treats waiting at the end.  We love you Berski ! 
Kip n Dave]]> 2020-08-22 02:41:59 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692672169 Quail??!!?? rebeccastanfel https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692685569 Dear Jay, 
Happy birthday! I realized, when I sat down to write this, that I’ve known you for 40 percent of your life. I hazily remember our first Passover, but vividly remember camping with you and Rebecca at Dog Creek, and your hoisting Nate on your shoulders to hike up the hill. 
We’ve enjoyed many meals since, arguing like siblings to Rebecca’s great discomfort but to my great pleasure. And what would Passover be without your recounting of how God threatened the Jews with quail? “Quail? Quail?! You want QUAIL?!!!! I’LL GIVE YOU QUAIL!!!!!!…”
Here’s to many more Passovers and other times too—looking forward to getting together for a birthday meal, with *maybe* more grilled meat than you can eat, whenever it’s safe.
Love to you from the Kohl Wyatts! 
P.S. I looked for a Passover picture but couldn’t find one, so this one (taken by Molly) of Jewish Christmas will have to do.

]]> 2020-08-22 03:14:09 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/692685569 Jay, pdtoast https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/693017778 Happy 50th birthday!  We hope you have a great day and a wonderful  year and wish we could be there to celebrate.
Love,
Larry, Dottie, Laura, Paul, Jessica]]> 2020-08-22 19:56:15 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/693017778 https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/693060316 Too much I could say
From the NNHS speech team, to hoops at Newton Centre Park to Ethos, to Rocky IV to long winded political discussions to rambling phone calls to Trivial Pursuit with your siblings to law school stories and Bar Exam commiserations to raising families and trying to keep it moving through it all. For any and everything in between, it has been and honor and privilege to share this over 30-year friendship.  You are a role model and an inspiration.  Happy Birthday and welcome to the 50th floor
Your friend always, Drew ]]> 2020-08-22 21:44:30 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/693060316 50. https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/693104681 How could I have known, 30 years ago, when you walked into a house on Osage Avenue, that I'd meet someone I'd be honored to call a friend for life? I'm thankful for that random chance, and all the years ever since. Much love, JB]]> 2020-08-23 00:15:45 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/693104681 Welcome to the Fifties! https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/693164239 I hope you can make every day special but today extra special, and this b.d. extra special.  I wish I had some photos of us drinking beers in DC or eating green jello with Senator Lee.  We've shared some good times and look forward to more in the years ahead.  Have a great day and a great year ahead filled with joy, love, and contentment.
All the best, Stanley P]]> 2020-08-23 03:15:58 UTC https://padlet.com/rebeccastanfel/1lgxtrqc9eiv26hl/wish/693164239