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Matuto kang tumimbang ng lahat, ng mali at matuwid; at hanapin mo ang pinakaugat na siyang sanhi ng kanilang paghihirap sa buhay at sa diwa. Ngunit tiyakin mo muna sa pamamagitan ng mga naunang hakbang, na nauunawaan mo na ang kanilang kalagayan. Tingnan mo ang lahat sa pamamagitan ng mata ng Maykapal.

ANALYZE WHAT YOU OBSERVE.

Learn to weigh all things, both what is wrong and right; and find the very core of the struggles that affect their lives. But you can only do this through the first few steps, only if you truly understand how they are feeling and what they are going through. Look at everything you observe and experience in the eyes of faith.

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Don’t be too investigative, the goal is not to interrogate. Be careful with the words you use, lest you offend anyone in the area. In fact, it would be better if you do not say anything at all first, especially if you are uncertain of what to say. Listen to the people first – listen to what they are saying and beyond this, strive to listen to what they are NOT saying. It is only then when you can say to them that you understand them. There lies the possibility that they will be ready to speak and tell you what they cannot say. You allow their very self humanity to open up with your own self and humanity.

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LOOK (CLOSELY).
“Looking” entails not just seeing with your eyes, but also with your entire being. Keep your eyes open, don’t dream, don’t fall asleep. The truth is in front of you! You are in the middle of a mystery, don’t faint or be afraid! Look at their eyes; look if their smiles are sweet or bitter. Feel what they are feeling. (Are their hearts still beating?) Look at their very being as people but don’t just examine them. You need to sharpen your ability to feel. Look at the things surrounding their lives and experiences. Try to comprehend their hearts’ deepest longings, their hopes, aspirations as well as frustrations.

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Your intention to engage with the people in your Binhi area must be sincere. If you engage with the area simply because you want to, nothing is bound to come out of the experience. Also, if you engage with the area out of the belief that the people there need you, you are mistaken. You are not, by any means, a Messiah or Saviour of sorts. You are simply a person, a human being, just like the members of the community you will be engaging with.

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Don’t rely solely on your own strength. You need God/love and spiritual guidance as you go through the engagement more than anything, more than you can ever fathom. What we are “doing” “[being with other people] does not mean you already fully understand all of this before you do it. What matters most is when you are finally and actually there, person-to-person, ready to learn and share yourself.

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Do not judge based on just what you see and hear in the call. Don’t come to a decision based on just your logic. Immerse yourself in their way of life and experiences, in what they hold closest to their hearts, into their very selves. Open up yourself so you can understand them much deeper. This asks from you a deep sense of humility, compassion, patience, and inner strength to face the difficulties that you will encounter. This asks you to share your life deeply. Makipagkwentuhan ka.

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Listening isn't simply about hearing their sentiments, lives, and stories. It's about absorbing their identities, recognizing their struggles and integrating their accounts with your understanding through empathy

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Respect is humanity's bridge for co-existence.

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Respect is humanity's bridge for co-existence.

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As aforementioned, listening is essential in order to practice solidarity with them and their struggles. It is important to make them feel heard and their problems acknowledged. I will reassure her that her feelings and sentiments are valid. I will also take initiative to promise and reassure her that whatever she expressed would stay between us and within the group.

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Bago magsimula ang Online Kwentuhan, dapat siguraduhin kung maayos ba ang konsekyon sa internet at kung gumagana ba ang audio ng gadget na gagamitin. Kapag wala o hindi maganda ang koneksyon, kung maaari, gamitin ang data ng telepono. Kailangan din ihanda ang sarili 5-10 minuto bago ang nakatalagang oras para sa programa.

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Para sa akin, isinasagawa ang online kuwentuhan upang tayo ay maging mulat sa mga karanasan ng iba't ibang tao. Hindi natin isinisasagawa ito dahil wala lamang, bagkus  ginagawa natin ito upang makihalubilo sa ibang tao, na katulad natin ay parte rin  ng isang komunidad.

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Concern for their safety is also an act of listening.

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Concern for their safety is also an act of listening.

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I would first allow nanay to finish her account, afterwards I would ask her how she is doing despite her circumstances. I would, ofcourse, sympathize with her situation and encourage her to keep safe.

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Ang buhay ay higit pa sa sarili lamang. Hindi tayo matututo kung nakasentro ang ating pag-iisip sa sarili lamang natin. Ang pakikipagkwentuhan at pagkilala sa kanila ay magdudulot ng mas malawak na perspektibo at pang-unawa, hindi lamang sa atin kundi sa kanila rin. Makatutulong rin ito sa pagkilala sa sarili. Dahil we start being ourselves more, when we stop being for ourselves alone.

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Makatutulong na maghanda bago ganapin ang kwentuhan. Hindi naman sa pagiging skripted, ngunit makatutulong ang paghahanda upang magkaroon ka ng ideya kung ano ang mga maaari ninyong pag-usapan.
Sa mismong araw ng kwentuhan, kumalma lamang at buksan ng maigi ang puso at isipan. Ang bukas na isip, sinamahan ng tengang handang makinig, at pusong tunay nakararamdam ay makahahanap ng bagay na pag-uusapan.

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Kung nawalan ako ng internet connection, ang aking gagawin ay magpaload upang magamit ako nalang ay mag mobile data. Kung masyadong mabagal ang mobile data ko, maari akong pumunta sa bahay ng pinsan ko dahil magkapit bahay lang naman kami. Kung wala po talaga, sisiguraduhin ko po na mainform po ang aking mga kaklaseng kasama sa online kwentuhan at ang Instructor/Formator.

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I believe that one way or another, as humans, we are connected. We do not go through or experience the same things and we do not always agree on and believe in the same things either. But, at our core, we are human. We do not have to have the same stories or experiences to understand one another. In this context, when it comes to sharing with nanay, even though our lives and our experiences are different, I will let my heart and mind be open to whatever she may possibly share. I let myself talk not in my own shoes but trying to do so by placing myself in hers. There is always something to talk about with anyone, you just have to be willing to open yourself up and to connect yourself to the person you’re talking to.

Just like what Ella said, it’s also useful to prepare beforehand possibly by having stories or personal experiences in mind that can be brought up or connected to what nanay could share.

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Hindi talaga maiiwasang walang maitanong, pero maganda na ang maging handa. Iisipin ko nang parang may kaibigan 🤬 akong nakausap matapos ang ilang taon ng hindi pagkita o pag-usap. Masaya, nagtatanong tungkol sa buhay nila ngayon, noon, at iba pa. Ang mahalaga ay hindi lang maibahagi ni nanay sa akin ang kanyang sariling mga kwento, pero pati na rin ang maintindihan ko ang kanyang saloobin at magkaintindihan kami. :) -Bern Mendoza

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Since sessions are planned out days prior, I will have to re-schedule my online kwentuhan to a different date instead of disrupting ongoing ones.

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Isinasagawa ang online kwentuhan sa simpleng rason na pakikihalubilo sa iba't ibang tao na mayroong iba't ibang kalakaran sa buhay. Ang pakikipag-ugnayan sa ating kapwa sa pamamagitan ng pakikipagpalitan ng kwento't mga opinyon ay pahihintulutan ang ating sarili na maging bukas ang isipan at mamulat sa mga kaibahan ng ating mga karanasan sa buhay.

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Bago ang online kwentuhan, maliban sa aking koneksyon at kagamitan, nangangailangan rin na aking ihanda ang bukas na kaisipan; kailangan ay tanggalin ko sa aking kaisipan ang anumang panghuhusga o preconceived notion sa komunidad na aming pakikipag-ugnayan.

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As much as possible, I'll try my best to avoid such instance as this would create an awkward atmosphere. However, if I do become late by a few minutes, I will catch up and try as best as I can to keep up with the conversation.

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The quality of my interaction would most probably depend on my ability to engage and interact. If I were feeling sick, I might feel groggy and altogether be absent from the moment. If I am not feeling well, I will ask my professor if I could reschedule, and try my best to feel well ASAP.

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If I have connectivity concerns on the day of my online kwentuhan, I would go to my close neighbor's house and ask if I could use their wifi. If they are not in their house, I will go to the tindahan nearby and buy load so I can connect using mobile data.

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I will just ignore the people passing by if they're preoccupied with something else. If not, acknowledging their presence can also be topic starters! As long as you respectfully acknowledge the people, I don't think it would pose a problem!

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As humans, we have the powerful gift of empathy. If someone shares an intimate and personal story, I will assure them that whatever emotions they have are valid. I will also assure them of confidentiality, that whatever they share in our small circle stays between our small circle.

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I would listen attentively to nanay as she is sharing is her story and afterwards, I will respectfully express my concern regarding her and her family's well-being. I will also remind her to make sure to follow safety procedures to lessen the risk of Covid-19 for her family.

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Preparing does not mean that it's scripted & not sincere. Preparation may get the conversation flowing smoothly. We're humans; we make mistakes, there are communication strategies that don't go as planned, and that's okay! Even with lifelong friends, there are awkward holes in the conversation, so it's not wrong to conceive possible topics prior to the online kwentuhan. :D

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I'll thank them and compliment their setting as well then pose a new topic.

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I will make sure that I'll be ready for the online kwentuhan by revisiting the previous modules for tips and by making sure that I have a contingency plan if unexpected things happen. I would also prepare myself for online kwentuhan by relaxing myself and making sure I don't feel tense (so I do not exude that tension and energy into the atmosphere or setting).

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It varies on how late I am for the Kwentuhan session. I can try to catch up if it had only been a few minutes, but if it's longer than that, I will reschedule for a different kwentuhan session and apologize to the moderators for not showing up at all since I want to be sensitive to how disrupting it could be had I joined mid-conversation.

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I would ignore them, but if they wave at the camera, it wouldn't hurt to smile and wave back out of respect :-)

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I would smile and thank them, then divert the topic to avoid awkward air.

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If I'm not feeling well, I would also have to put my online kwentuhan off :( I probably won't make good conversation with the nanays if I'm sick, and I would just have to contact Sir Serge or our beadle to inform them of the situation. I'd make sure to make up for it when I reschedule, though!
- Leia Canuto

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Bagaman pinakamabuti na iwasan ang mga ganitong pagkakataon, sa kaso na maganap nga ang senaryong ito, agad akong hihingi ng paumanhin sa mga kasama ko at kay nanay at susubukang magreschedule nalang upang hindi makaabala sa ongoing na sesyon.

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I will first make sure that I have good and stable internet connectivity so as to not cause any delays and disruptions during the online kwentuhan session. Bearing the session objectives in mind, I will also come prepared with my icebreakers, questions, and stories (kwento) that I could possibly bring up during the interaction.

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Bago ang lahat, kailangan ko na siguraduhin na maaga ang aking pansariling paghahanda upang maiwasan ito. Ngunit, kung baka sakaling maganap ito, susubukin ko na humabol kapag mayroon pang oras na maaari pa akong makibahagi. Kung wala, babawi na lamang ako sa pamamagitan ng pagsali sa ibang schedule ng online kwentuhan.

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Sa sitwasyon na hindi maganda ang aking pakiramdam sa araw ng aking online kwentuhan, ipapaalam ko agad sa iba na ako ay hindi makakadalo sa araw na iyon at hihingi ng pagkakataon na sumali na lamang sa ibang schedule.

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Kung sakaling ako ay mawalan ng internet connection habang nasa online kwentuhan, agad kong gagamitin ang aking cellular data upang makabalik. Ngunit kung ito ay hindi pa rin sapat para maging malinaw ang pag-uusap ko sa aking mga kasama, ipapaalam ko agad sa iba at sa formator ang aking problema sa connection.

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If I realize I am late, I would first try to message our teacher, formator, or fellow coursemate to see if it would be appropriate for me to join. Since I'm already late, I wouldn't want to cause further disruptions by suddenly joining in the middle of someone talking. As soon as I got the go signal, I would join immediately.

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We need to remember to be respectful of their boundaries. As such, it is important to pay attention not only to what they say verbally, but also the nonverbal signals that might indicate whether the topic should be continued.  If it's ever unclear, though, it may be better to ask whether they'd be okay continuing with the topic instead of assuming.

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Like the other people, I would also thank them for saying that. I'd probably also try to change the topic to avoid being seen as showing off, but if they're interested or asking questions about it, then I would answer them respectfully.

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To prepare for the online kwnetuhan, I will try to ensure that my connection will be stable and have my mobile data ready as my contingency. I will also have some fun but appropriate icebreaker questions in mind so that the partner community can feel more comfortable relaxed with me and my groupmates. Plus, I will set an alarm before the session so that I will be on time to the session.

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To prepare for the online kwnetuhan, I will try to ensure that my connection will be stable and have my mobile data ready as my contingency. I will also have some fun but appropriate icebreaker questions in mind so that the partner community can feel more comfortable relaxed with me and my groupmates. Plus, I will set an alarm before the session so that I will be on time to the session.

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If this were to happen, I would try to find other means of joining the synchronous session, like using my mobile data or asking my family to share their mobile data via hotspot so that I can still join. However, in the case that it really is not possible, I would text my classmates or groupmates and inform them of my circumstances and later coordinate with my Binhi moderator so that I can join another Online kwentuhan.

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If this were to happen, I would try to find other means of joining the synchronous session, like using my mobile data or asking my family to share their mobile data via hotspot so that I can still join. However, in the case that it really is not possible, I would text my classmates or groupmates and inform them of my circumstances and later coordinate with my Binhi moderator so that I can join another Online kwentuhan.

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Nararapat na maging normal ang reaksyon. Hindi dapat ito pansinin kung hindi naman ito ganoon kaimportante. Ngunit para makapagsimula ng isang konbersasyon, maaring magtanong tungkol sa mga dumadaan na ito kay nanay. Ngunit dapat ring sukatin kung komportable ba kay nanay na pagusapan o ito o hindi.

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Aking kakamustahin ang kalagayan ni nanay at ng kaniyang pamilya. Maaari ring tanungin kung may kailangan ba silang tulong upang kahit papaano ay mabigyan ng pansin at matugunan ang kanilang mga pangangailangan.

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Just like what the others mentioned, it may be disrespectful or insensitive to suddenly enter mid-conversation. So, I would find the best possible time to enter the session then apologize to the participating community, my blockmates, and our formator for being late. Though, if I were to completely miss the whole session, it would be best to request a reschedule, still not forgetting to apologize.

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Since I still have an hour before the Online Kwentuhan, I will try my best to maximize that time and find ways on how to still participate in the session such as loading my phone with mobile data, then informing my blockmates and formator about my current situation, so that just in case I lose connection again, I could reschedule to another session.

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It is important to listen to them attentively. To do so, I will open my camera. I will also not browse through my phone. I will keep in mind my nonverbal cues to avoid misunderstandings. Simply, I will show them that I am there and that I care.

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Sa dati naming paaralan, parte talaga ng aming curriculum ang pagbisita sa mga iba't ibang komunidad. Kada gagawin namin 'yon, madalas kakayanin kong maglead ng conversation o magtanong sa mga tao, pero hanggang ngayon mabilis pa rin ako kabahan kumausap sa iba in general. Mental preparation is pretty difficult for me because I just cause myself to get anxious, but once in the moment, nagiging komportable naman ako. Ang tip na ibibigay ko (sa sarili ko) ay magrelax at tandaan na hindi kailangang ipressure ang sarili, dapat lang na komportable ang environment para sa lahat at hindi iyon mangyayari kung ako mismo mukhang hindi komportable.

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Nasanay akong dumalo pa rin sa mga gawain kahit masama ang pakiramdam dahil kadalasan makakalimutan ko rin at magagawa ko parang normal. Kung ganoon, sasama pa rin ako sakaling alam kong hindi naman halatang masama ang aking pakiramdam. Besides, hindi naman ako sakitin.
That being said, if 'di ko talaga sure kung kakayanin ng katawan at utak kong dumalo, sasabihan ko na lang ang aming moderator at ang aking mga kagrupo at magrereschedule.

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Since the online setting limits our nonverbal communication, I will do my best to express concern and empathy through facial expression. I would definitely listen and only speak if they ask me to, I just want to make sure that they're comfortable with being vulnerable with me and taht they know they are heard and recognized.

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Everyone deserves nothing less than all of you.

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Everyone deserves nothing less than all of you.

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If I am feeling unwell, I will attempt to try to feel better through taking medicine and resting. However, if I believe that I cannot give my community my whole hearted love, I would make it up to them.