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Polyamorous relationships, is a relationship that consists of a person having multiple partners. Often times these partners are engaging in romantic, and typically sexual relations. Polygamy is where one has multiple wives. “Polygamy is a form of consensual non-monogamy” (Sheff 1). There are many different definitions of what this is and what it could look like but in most cases it involves having an open relationship, where partners are able to take other partners. This is considered sexual deviance due to the fact that monogamy is something that is valued in our culture, and veering from that creates a deviant behavior. Due to this, this type of relationship becomes discredited.  Also “one of the most deviant aspects of polyamory is that it’s sanctions multiple sexual partners for all genders, including women” (Sheff 8). When one has multiple partners there is often negative stigma that surrounds that person and that partner. It also can be considered cheating, and due to most society standards people can only truly love one person, so it is considered deviant when they want to love more than one. Sheff also makes the commentary that “polyamorous possibility is cast as deviant because it highlights the weakness of the heterosexual nuclear family and compulsory monogamy” (Sheff 10).  I believe that this topic is important because; as society changes, I believe that open relationships and polyamorous relationships may begin to become more common, and accepted in society. I believe that it is crucial that society actually understands what it consists of.

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Behavior would apply to this type of deviance. The people in polyamorous relationships are choosing to be in them, this is an achieved status. Selection then would also apply to this behavior, they selected to have multiple partners, they had a choice in the matter.

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This behavior could be described using normativist/positivist theory: this theory states that there is a set of norms of behavior that society agrees on. One of those norms is monogamy, in polyamorous relationships this breaks the  norm because many people find it discerning when they learn that a person has multiple relationships, “Societies support and privilege ‘normal and good’ forms of sexuality and punish those defined  as ‘abnormal and bad’ through law, violence, ridicule or stigma” (Worthen 1).

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This behavior could also fall under the social constructionist. Social Constructionists assume that behavior is not automatically deviant; it becomes deviant when it is labeled that way. Polyamorous relationships are only labeled deviant because; people in the western culture are uncomfortable with that kind of social interaction. Polygamy is more accepted in other cultures, “underscores that polygamy is not an exotic non-western custom…polygamy is world-wide, cross-cultural in its scope, it is found on all continent's and among adherents of all world religions (Zeitzen 4). Thus showcasing the often criticism of social constructionist theory, that what is considered deviant can change depending on the culture.

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Goffman's theory basically states that if a person has an attribute that makes them less desirable, they become a tainted person, or in other words stigmatized. The stigma for polyamorous relationships would be discreditable. This conclusion is drawn due to the reasoning that people walking down the street would be unable to tell that a person is in a polyamorous relationship they would be passing, the deviance is not immediately known. The visibility of the stigma consists of how the stigma is adapted to show that the individual possesses it. In this case this stigma is not that visible, people coming into contact with that person would not automatically know that they possess that stigma. This could also relate to personal identity, personal identity consists of stigma management, an example of this consists of whether the person would try harder to conceal the stigma from strangers or inmates. In this case because the stigma is discreditable a person in a polyamorous relationship would have an easier time concealing it from strangers then inmates. The stigma type would be blemishes of an individual character. Blemishes of an individual character consists of unnatural passions, and rigid belief.  Due to the fact that polyamorous relationship are deviating from the norm of monogamy they are already having unnatural passions. Also even if polygamy is consensual, some still view it as cheating which would then bring the persons individual character into question, and traits like dishonesty into circulation.

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For this behavior they would consider it a deviance career, they would continue to do the deviant behavior. It is a lifestyle that they have adapted. This is not a one time act this is something that they will be continuously doing and participating in. Primary deviance may have consisted of initially trying to have another partner one time, but it eventually led to having a full relationship and living that lifestyle.

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I think just the simple act of having multiple partners in itself is not deviant, and should not be considered deviant. Although I believe that polyamorous relationships can easily become deviant, when there is no longer consent for all parties. Some examples of negative impacts, that have manifested from polyamorous relationships, would be the FLDS cult, in this case while it was polygamy not polyamorous, it however; still at times gets grouped in together. In this case polygamy was abused by marrying men to under aged children, and sexually abusing their wives, this is an example of nonconsensual polygamy. This I think is often what society thinks of when polyamorous relationships are mentioned, of a man abusing his power. However in modern society; I think that there can be progressive ways of having consensual polyamorous relationships. Fairly recently open relationships have begun to become more accepted and less of a taboo topic, there are also shows that show polyamorous relationships such as Bachelor, and Bachelorette, I believe that it is slowly becoming more main stream. While polygamy I believe it still not as accepted, polyamorous relationships where people are not getting married just have multiple partners is becoming more accepted into society.

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In the article Polyamory is Deviant- But Not for the Reasons You May Think, Deviant Behavior , discusses the fact that many people are uncomfortable with the thought of someone having multiple partners. This is due to the fact that people are unwilling to believe that people are able to love more than one person romantically. “Compulsory Monogamy has not existed for a long time, creating serial monogamy” (Sheff 5).  where people get together and then break up with each partner. Having multiple partners consecutively just not at the same time.  In the book Polygamy: A Cross-Cultural Analysis Zeitzen makes commentary on the fact that polygamy is very prevalent in many cultures historically and the only reason that it is seen as deviant is that "modern times have brought streamlining of marriage patterns to all societies around the world" (Zeitzen 1). Both authors come to the conclusion that polyamorous relationships are often misunderstood, and that it mostly stems to the taboo of being comfortable and open about sexual relationships. In the book Sexual Deviance and Society Worthen summarizes that "strict norms that reinforce rigid parameters of "appropriate" expressions of gender and sexuality" (Worthen 32). Thus making polyamorous deviant due to the fact that it falls out of those boundaries. It seems like through these works that polyamorous relationships has been a subject of discussion before and continues to be an object of study.

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Goffman Erving. Stigma: Notes on the Management of Spoiled Identity. New York, Touchstone.

Miriam Koktvedgaard Zeitzen. 2008. Polygamy: A Cross-Cultural Analysis. New York, Berg Publishers.

Sheff Elisabeth. 2020. Polyamory Is Deviant – But Not for the Reasons You May Think, Deviant Behavior. Chattanooga, Tennessee, Sheff Consulting.

Worthen G. F. Meredith. 2021. Sexual Deviance and Society. Routledge; 2nd edition.