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The Crisis of Being the Child of Young Parents and Erikson's Psychosocial Development

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The Crisis of Being the Child of Young Parents and Erikson's Psychosocial Development

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This timeline is about my personal experiences, conflicts, and resolutions regarding Erik Erikson's Theory of Psychosocial Development. All of the smaller crisis's throughout this timeline are based upon the main crisis of being the child of young parents who never got to decide who they wanted to be. It is important to notate that when I was growing up, I was apart of a blended family that was very unhealthy and very unsafe. As an adult, I am now apart of a new blended family that is substantially better and working towards healing those broken ends.

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Ages: Birth to 12-18 months

Definition: I would describe the development stage of basic trust versus mistrust as young children, or 'babies', learning from their parents the concepts of safety, trust, and hope or learning that hope, safety, and trust aren't always real or promised.

Going back into my childhood, I had a lot of instability since my parents were separated. They would often go behind each others backs to talk down to me about the other parent. My mom also remarried to a man who was not so nice and she would always give me false hope that things would get better. This led my resolution to lean strongly toward mistrust because I had no hope, trust, or safety with my parents. According to the textbook, "After all, if you feel that others have your back, you are likely to try new things and thus develop new skills. By contrast, if you feel alone and uncertain, you can still develop autonomy, but it is more difficult (pgs. 13-14)." I resonate with this quotation because although I can still move forward with my life, always gearing towards mistrust makes it difficult to make friends, build relationships, and even trust that I have my best interest at heart.

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Age: 12-18 months through 3 years

Definition: I would describe the developmental stage of autonomy versus shame as the stage where children start learning how to be independent in their abilities or they learn to always doubt themselves and their abilities.

Going back to my childhood, there was always a lot of instability surrounding basic needs and necessities. One of the biggest inconsistencies was showering. My mom would often forget to bathe us since she worked all the time and hardly saw us, so I had to trust myself and my ability to learn how to properly take care of myself and my basic needs. In the text, it says, "As children are better able to make their wishes understood, they become more powerful and independent (pg. 157)." This quote resonates with me because I have always been headstrong and determined that I can advocate for myself, fill my needs, and fill my wants myself with my abilities and that I don't need to depend on someone else. This makes me feel like the resolution that I got out of this stage was autonomy instead of shame.

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Ages: 3-6 years old

Definition: I would describe the developmental stage of initiative versus guilt as children either learning that it is okay to want to try and do new things or children learning that new is bad and that they should stick to what they were taught or told to do.

Looking back on my childhood, this developmental stage reflected on me through the concept of sports and programs that I could have benefitted from, both structurally and mentally. I remember always begging my parents to do sports and programs, however I would always end up quitting because my schedule would always cause my parents to hate each other even more and argue all the time. In the text, it says, "The conflict of initiative versus guilt marks a split between two parts of the personality: the part that remains a child, full of exuberance and a desire to test new powers, and the part that is becoming an adult, constantly examining the propriety of motives and actions (pg. 210)." This quote stuck out to me because instead of embracing being a kid and doing the fun things I wanted to do and choosing the path of initiative, I instead worried myself to the point of quitting everything I wanted because I stepped into that adult role of wondering if it was worth causing my parents to fight and being the burden that would cause the fights. My resolution for this stage is a lifetime of guilt with everything I do.

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Ages: 6 years old to puberty

Definition: I would describe the developmental stage of industry versus inferiority as the stage where children learn skill sets that can benefit them through life, like working hard and getting along with others, or they become what some may call unable or incompetent.

Looking back on my childhood, this developmental stage reflected on me in my schooling. My parents have never been the wealthiest because they had me really young and they never valued further education, even though it would help us financially. However, my parents have always valued having connections with people that could further us in life. In the text, it says, "Developing a sense of industry, by contrast, involves learning how to work hard and achieve goals (pg. 276)." This quote sticks out to me because I have always prioritized making great connections with everyone around me, whether it is in work or school, and I have always worked really hard in school so that I can have the schooling opportunities that I have today, which will help me one day build a stable foundation for when I want to get married and have kids of my own. The resolution I found for myself is industry over inferiority.

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5th Stage: Identity versus Identity Confusion

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5th Stage: Identity versus Identity Confusion

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Ages: Puberty through Young Adulthood

Definition: I would describe the developmental stage of identity versus identity confusion as the stage where people must learn who they are and who they want to be, instead of who they are supposed to be based on societal roles.

Looking back into my childhood, the biggest problem I have faced was based on identity confusion. I was raised in an household where my mother played every role imaginable but never talked about or identified who she was. She would always degrade her worth and put value behind being who other people wanted her to be. This ability to mask into whoever other people wanted me to be and minimize who I was has had the worst effect on most developmental stages of my life. In the text, it says," The effort to make sense of the self is part of a healthy process that builds on achievements of earlier stages- on trust, autonomy, initiative, and industry- and lay the groundwork for coping with the challenges of adult life (pg. 336)." This quote stuck out to me in relation to this developmental stage because it kind of shows reason behind why I have never been able to determine who I am, based on not positive resolutions of previous stages. Overall, my resolution for this stage is identity confusion because of my inability to be genuine and proud of who I am as a person and of my achievements, just like what I saw as a child.

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Ages: Young Adulthood

Definition: I would describe the developmental stage of intimacy versus isolation as the time period in someone's life where they can either build strong relationships with friends, family, and romantic relationships or they can isolate themselves from having the opportunity to experience those connections.

Looking back on my childhood, I moved around a lot due to job instability from my parents. However, wherever I went, I was always able and striving to make connections with my peers. I did not have the privilege of making any long standing friendships, however I did have people I would confide in and talk to. This made a huge difference in my adult life. In the text, it says," Confiding in a friend helps young people explore their own feelings, define their identity, and validate their self-worth (pg. 351)." This quotation resonates with me because I was fortunate with my job to make long lasting friendships that have finally allowed me to be myself and be prideful of my ability to be a dependent person for my friends as well. My resolution for this stage is choosing intimacy over isolation because I value those friendships more than feeling like I have no worth to anyone.

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7th Stage: Generativity versus Stagnation

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7th Stage: Generativity versus Stagnation

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Ages: Middle Adulthood

Definition: I would describe the developmental stage of generativity versus stagnation as the stage where young adults can either work through their hard parts to guide the next generations in a different and more positive path or they can sit and continue to let those hard parts fester and role over to the next generation, allowing those negative cycles to keep going.

Looking back on my childhood, there were a lot of hard parts for my family. My parents were separated and hated each other, they often rolled over their trauma from childhood onto me and my siblings, and they never had hope that they could change or be happier. However, I am very fortunate to say that I have never let those hard parts roll over into my future. I have always been determined that my future family will never face the hard parts that I saw and experienced growing up. Everyday, I wake up and decide that today is a new day and that yesterday and the past happened, but that it doesn't have to determine my future. In the text, it states," At any point in the life span, development could shift in a positive direction, and a crisis might be successfully resolved and a new strength developed." This quote makes me really feel confident in my ability to choose the resolution of generativity over stagnation because every day, there are choices I can make to heal myself to not only make my life better, but to one day make my future family's life better.

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Ages: Late Adulthood

Definition: I would describe the developmental stage of integrity versus despair as the option for someone to be proud and happy with the life they have lived when they reach the end of their road versus fearing that they haven't done enough and wanting to relive their life when it's their time.

Looking back through my life so far, I have experienced a lot of ups and downs, twists and turns. I've had really prideful moments and I have experienced deep regret. When I filled out my questionnaire, I put down that my resolution for this stage has always been and will always be despair. I am afraid to die one day. I have always been afraid to die. I don't want to see my loved ones move on and I don't want my loved ones to watch me move on. There have been many points in time where I have begged to live forever and to relive my life over and over, so that I can experience it a little happier. That I could experience life without the hard parts. With a happier family and more opportunities for myself. In the text, it states this about integrity versus despair: "Elderly person achieves acceptance of own life, allowing acceptance of death, or else, despairs over inability to relive life (pg. 11, Table 1.3)." This definition really cuts deep for me because after sitting down and working on this assignment, I am choosing the resolution of integrity. I am choosing that one day when my day comes, I will be thankful for this life and my experiences, instead of being afraid of being no longer. I will choose to have gratitude for my good and bad resolutions, but I will accept that this life is not forever, but it is a good life.