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As someone who has been a victim to societal standards I do strongly believe that is you let society's standards affect your goals and your aspirations than it will and it WILL be hard. I wrote this blog to sort of talk about the affects of society's standards and the right way to have dreams and aspirations.

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Writing this, I remembered times where I would limit myself to the life I could have because of the circumstances given to me. I wrote about the moment in my life where I decided to dream of a life beyond impossible.

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Joy, compassion, kindness, warmheartedness, and love. I would say these 5 simple words are my greatest attributes. I don´t say this to boast or the sound conceded but in all honesty I truly believe these are my greatest attributes. Something that has always stuck with me is ¨We can´t heal the world today but we can begin with a voice of compassion, a heart of love, and an act of kindness¨. I believe there is always change in that can be made even if it isn't as soon as today or tomorrow. Sometimes the best change takes a great amount of time.

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Oh, how that word knows just how to make my skin burn. The disappointment I have with today's society is endless. There are many things that have an impact on this emotion such as the lack of unity in today's world. Around March of last month i´d scroll though social media disgusted with how many people were fighting against each-other such as racism, riots, vandalism, etc. It´s sad how people are willingly turning against each-other when we should be fighting together. For example, the black lives matter movement. The goal of the movement was to stop racism towards black people and to put forward that they are just as worthy as any other race, until that wasn't the goal any more. All of the sudden you'd see African Americans bashing on white people using the stereotype that all white people were racist. The way society has easily let unity go is just sad. I miss the times where race and skin color wasn't so dividing. I remember playing on the playground with my group of childhood friends that were all sorts of ethnicity´s. Now, everyone is divided by society's division. Oh, how quickly i´d go back to my childhood if given the chance.

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Do the simplest things in like make you happy? They sure make me happy. Like when I wake up and it´s raining outside my window, or how grass grows between concrete, how two old people hold hands, or when ducks waddle in a group, or maybe just as simple as a field of dandelions in the sun but not a hot sun, just perfectly warm. Sometimes it´s a matter of the tiny things in life that know just how to make you smile, a genuine happy smile. Writing this makes me wander, what makes you smile?

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The fear of being unworthy. Of love, of life, of grace, of the simple gratitude's I receive from others. I fear of being unworthy. Im sure you've felt it, matter fact im sure everyone has at one point in their life. Its not easy. Its like drowning in a pool of insecurity's saying to yourself ¨im worth nothing more in life than a bucket of pocket change¨. Yet that pocket change would seem worthy to so many others. I truly believe that we don´t see ourselves from the correct prospective or point of view and that we doubt ourselves so much more rather than acknowledging our work . Yet I still feel unworthy.

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Oh, how underestimated that word can be. ¨The existence of an individual human being or animal¨.
Life isn't just about living as for being human isn't just about being human. Life and humanity are worth so much more than they are credited for. Being human is about failing, losing, struggling, not being enough, whereas being alive is getting up and pushing yourself to the fullest and winning no matter how long it took to get there. Growing up my life was filled with setbacks. Until it wasn't. I've had days (and still do) where I feel like I have lost or where I had faced many setbacks to the point where I get overwhelmed but something I've learned is that the stress and the overwhelming moments in life never go away until you build yourself up again. Life is more than just a word. Life is what I stand for.

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What makes me who I am today? Freedom, mindset, determination, soul, compassion, faithfulness, and hope. And of-course its not all good , I´m not a character straight from a movie lol. I also have traits that are not so amazing such as procrastination, doubtfulness, insecurity's, lack of emotion, etc. These all make me who I am today for I have most definitely learned the hard way. But who am I to judge? I have not yet to hear what others have to say. I can sit and wander all day and think of the what other might have to say but it wouldn't do me any good at the end of the day.

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Well that´s not the simplest of questions. In dept or just an simple explanation? My name is Allison and I am a 16 year old (as you may already know) with a mind as big as the ocean. No, my head isn't big. No, its not all knowledge. But yes, It is composed of thoughts. From the outside you may see my pale complexion, my curly hair, or even my hazel eyes but from the inside you may see loving yet too loving of a person or a happy yet sad a times person or maybe even an open yet closed off person. Although who am I to judge only from my perspective? Have a look for yourself.

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When you lay your head on your pillow at night, whats on your mind? Sunday mornings, what are your plans? What would you say if someone were to ask you what faith means from your prospective? My response to all of those would be... JESUS!
¨ Who am I that the highest king         would welcome me?
I was lost but he brought me in,
Oh, His love for me¨
These are lyrics from a very popular christian song. To me, Christianity isn't just about religion. Its a lifestyle, faith, hope, and a relationship. You may be thinking "what do those lyrics mean?" To me those lyrics simply mean, Who am I? Why would he want me? Why would he welcome me not only to his love and grace but to the highest land as in heaven? Why would he even pursue me? When I was younger, i´d sit in church silent and with no meaning which left me feeling lost and out of place. I mean in my opinion, I don´t deserve his love but still he loves. ¨I was lost but he brought me in". To me, that verse is not just a lyric from a song. I means so much more for even at my lowest moments, when I felt alone, or even felt no love at all, JESUS. He was there. Also, when life is great and feels surreal, I stop and say to him simply ¨thank you for loving and perusing me¨. Christianity isn't only about having faith when good things are given, its about pursuing the LIFE given. He is my highest  king and I couldn't and wouldn't want a life where he isn't my highest king.

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Song · 3:19 · 2018 · Available with an Apple Music subscription. Try it free.