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We are in the midst of a societal and public health crisis. We are losing our most vulnerable kids, largely due to perspectives that are outdated and counterproductive, and disciplinary practices that are punitive and exclusionary.

With each time-out, detention, suspension, expulsion, paddling, restraint, seclusion, and arrest at school, there are children who aren't getting the help they need and are being pushed away from caregivers who could instead be helping them.

The cost to all of us is profound. Overwhelmed, discouraged educators. Frustrated, desperate parents. Expensive placements. Disenfranchised, marginalized, alienated kids. A pipeline to prison.

It doesn't have to be this way.

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We are in the midst of a societal and public health crisis. We are losing our most vulnerable kids, largely due to perspectives that are outdated and counterproductive, and disciplinary practices that are punitive and exclusionary.

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www.TheMainIdea.net © The Main Idea 2009. All rights reserved.

Lost at School: Why Our Kids with Behavioral Challenges Are Falling Through the Cracks and How We Can Help Them

By Ross W. Greene (Scribner, 2008)

Book Group Questions from The Main Idea

The Story of Joey

1. What was your reaction to the incident involving Joey introduced in the first chapter? Who seems to be suffering in this narrative? Why?

Do you believe anyone was at fault for what happened? Do you think any of the staff members could have reacted differently to Joey?

The Basic Premise of the Book

2. What is the basic premise of the book - what does Dr. Greene believe to be the main problem facing kids with behavioral challenges? Why are they not behaving themselves according to Dr. Greene?

The Disciplinary System

3. What does the author say about the current state of our discipline system? How does it or doesn't it serve students who behave well? What about students with behavioral challenges? Why or why not? Do you agree/disagree and why or why not? What do you think works and doesn't work with your current disciplinary system?

Philosophy of Children

4. How is Dr. Greene's philosophy of children ("Kids do well if they can") different from the prevailing view ("Kids do well if they want to")? How do these differing views affect the way adults approach behavioral issues? Does you school seem to favor the former or latter view? How do your school policies or practices reflect the prevailing view about children? What can you tell about the teacher's (Mrs. Woods) philosophy and the other staff member's philosophies about challenging kids based on their reactions to Joey's incident?

Life Skills

5. Dr. Greene proposes a long list of life skills that kids with challenging behavior are lacking. What is your response to this list? Which items stand out or resonate for you and your experience with challenging students? Would you add any life skills to this list that seem to be missing? Are any of the items confusing?

Pills and Skills

6. Looking at the list of possible lagging skills. How does this compare to the diagnoses we are used to seeing in kids with challenging behavior (ADHD, bipolar disorder, etc.)? Why does the author prefer not to use these diagnoses? Can you explain the following quote from the book -- "pills don't teach skills." Do you agree or disagree? Why?

Lagging Skills and Unsolved Problems

7. Dr. Greene describes two culprits of children's challenging behavior -- lagging skills and unsolved problems. What is the difference between them? What does the author believe should be the first step in addressing challenging behavior and how can the ALSUP tool help?

Plan A

8. When teachers' expectations are unmet, they often respond with Plan A. What exactly is this plan? Even if teachers have been successful with this plan, why does Dr. Greene say this approach still contains flaws? What has been your personal experience with Plan A - do you use it frequently? Do you consider yourself to use it "nicely"? How is Plan A different from simply communicating an expectation?

Plan B

9. What are some of the benefits of using Plan B to address problems with kids? What are the three steps involved in Plan B? How do these differ from approaches you've used (even casually) or read about? What do you anticipate might be some obstacles to doing the three steps involved in Plan B? What are the most important benefits of the Empathy step? What might make this step hard to implement?

Plan B and Joey

10. In the continuation of the Joey story from pp.92-108 we see some of Plan B taking place. What were the actions and words in the narrative that you think will contribute to making this a successful plan? Is there anything else you think the staff members should have said or done? What concerns do you have about the new plan?

Using Plan B with a Group

11. On p. 208 Mrs. Woods attempts to use Plan B with her entire class to address a class issue. If you want to use Plan B with a group, what groundwork needs to be in place to make sure it's successful? What is your reaction to how Plan B plays out with her entire class? Do you think this would work with any age group? Would it need to be modified? If you were to ask the same open-ended question as Mrs. Woods does about the kids in her class not getting along, what types of issues do you imagine would surface in your class?

Concluding Thoughts

12. Overall, how did you feel about the resolution of Joey's challenging behavior? Does it seem realistic? Does it seem translatable to other kids in other situations?

13. How can you imagine Collaborative Problem Solving/Plan B working in your school? What would have to happen for your school to implement this? What obstacles would have to be overcome? Which students can you think of right now who would benefit?

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Get a FREE e-book by joining our mailing list today! Plus, receive recommendations for your next Book Club read. www.TheMainIdea.net © The Main Idea 2009. All rights reserved. Lost at School: Why Our Kids with Behavioral Challenges Are Falling Through the Cracks and How We Can Help Them By Ross W.

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Filmed by Lone Wolf Media and funded by the non-profit Lives in the Balance, is a 90-minute documentary film about the human side of being a child or student with behavioral challenges, and the struggles faced by parents, educators, staff in facilities, mental health clinicians, and judicial and law enforcement professionals in trying to ensure that these kids receive the help they need. The Kids We Lose also exposes the often brutal, inhumane ways in which kids with social, emotional, and behavioral challenges are treated in schools, inpatient psychiatry units, residential facilities, and prisons. Their hopelessness, misery, and frustration are palpable. The human toll is hard to fathom. But these are also the most expensive kids in our society. Doing the wrong thing costs a fortune. When we don't help our most vulnerable kids, we all lose.

The Kids We Lose is not primarily about how to solve the problem. It is intended to heighten awareness and galvanize people to advocate for change. If you're interested in getting involved, become a Lives in the Balance Advocator. There's a lot to be done, and Lives in the Balance Advocators are leading the way.

The Kids We Lose won the Best Feature Documentary Award in its premiere at the 2018 New Hampshire Film Festival. It has also screened at the 2019 Women's Film Festival in Philadelphia, at the 2019 Los Angeles Women's International Film Festival, and on Maine Public Television. Dates for airings on Vermont Public Television and New Hampshire Public Television will be announced soon.
The film is also available for local community screenings. Please contact us at litbdocumentary@gmail.com

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Filmed by Lone Wolf Media and funded by the non-profit Lives in the Balance, is a 90-minute documentary film about the human side of being a child or student with behavioral challenges, and the struggles faced by parents, educators, staff in facilities, mental health clinicians, and judicial and law enforcement professionals in trying to ensure that these kids receive the help they need.