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Communicating humor with contradiction will make you appear less stiff and uptight.

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Interviews can be so serious and boring. Here's how to weave in a little humor while still coming across as professional.

Laughter is a powerful connection tool. As Sophie Scott's TED talk puts it, part of the evolutionary purpose of laughter is to create social bonding. Humor is a great way to become memorable, stand out from the crowd, and leave a positive impression as a likable and fun person.

It can also be a way to shoot yourself in the foot by coming across as unprofessional, inappropriate, and otherwise cringe-worthy. Humor, especially job-interview humor, is a skill that some of us have mastered to a greater degree than others have. My experience as a hiring manager confirms that misplaced and poorly-timed jokes are anything but funny in an interview.

So, what do you do if you want to use job-interview humor in a way that will boost your candidacy? Keep these job-interview tips in mind:

1. Stay away from jokes

Jokes come across as clumsy, self deprecating, scripted, and fake. They can leave the interviewer thinking, "If he made that up, what else is he making up?" So, stay away from anything fabricated. If you feel compelled to memorize something funny, find a quote or two that might be relevant and keep them in your back pocket.

2. Reflect on something genuinely funny or fun in your life

The good news is that each one of us is surrounded by real-life events that are funny and make us smile. When you share a real-life experience in a fun frame, you get an opportunity to lighten the mood without coming across as fake. Look for something that has happened in your world and consider a way of slightly exaggerating or remixing the story to make a point.

3. Tie it into something relevant for the interview

Sam Horn, the Intrigue Expert, refers to it as "hinge and hook" - capturing a phrase or a story turn and linking it into your response or observation. Yes, this is a strategic use of humor.

How to use humor during your interview

Now that you know the types of ways to incorporate humor into your interview, you might be thinking, "This is all great theory, but how do I apply it?"

Let's start with an example.

While interviewing for a job as an accounting manager, I was asked about my ability to collaborate effectively in a high-pressure situation. I took the opportunity to weave in some job-interview humor.

"That is a great question," I said. "I am glad you asked because deadlines and high stakes can quickly turn a working relationship confrontational. As an auditor, I am no stranger to having to ask sensitive questions, dig into mistakes that could potentially damage someone's career, and poke around when people are just trying to do their jobs. To be effective at what I do, I had to come up with something that would lighten the mood and get me better results. I decided that I would bribe my clients..."

At this point, the interviewing manager's eyebrows went up in surprise, as I delivered the punchline:

"With chocolate and cookies!"

That got a chuckle, and I went on to explain that homemade cookies and foil-wrapped chocolate treats earned me a way into my clients' stomachs and hearts. As a result, clients did not dread the terrible visit from the auditor upstairs, but actually looked forward to our meetings. Delicious food will get you far!

Another way I used humor and fun in an interview came from spotting three tennis balls on a desk in the corner of the conference room. I was in my third interview for a consulting position, and the company director asked me how I managed conflicting priorities and communication in a large team.

Having had an opportunity to speak with him for about 15 minutes, I had a sense of his dynamic personality. We had built a good rapport and an easy-flowing conversation up to that point. These considerations inspired me to try something unconventional.

I asked his permission to get the tennis balls from the table to help me answer his question. Then, I began to juggle. All the while, I reflected on how important it is to have a clear focus, a disciplined practice, and a willingness to respond in the moment - both for juggling and for managing conflicting priorities. Now, the sight of a professional woman in a business suit juggling tennis balls is a special treat, and we did attract a bit of an audience. I even got a volunteer who wanted me to teach him how to do it! That's job-interview humor at it's best.

I will be the first to admit that my juggling was not perfect - I am a CPA, not a performance artist, and I did drop the ball once or twice. Far from feeling embarrassed, I turned it into an opportunity to talk about learning from past mistakes, assessing what works best, and course-correcting for continuous improvement.

In both cases, I got job offers.

Here are some important takeaways and job-interview tips for you to maximize your results in using humor in an interview, or any other professional situation:

1. Humor is only one part of your professional image. You can make it larger or smaller, but don't neglect your other professional attributes. Coming across as a perpetual jokester will not serve you.

2. Read your audience and follow the interviewing manager's lead. You cannot control how well your humor lands with the listener, so pay attention to cues and body language. Pushing it too far can feel awkward and unprofessional - the opposite of your desired effect of helping the conversation flow and lightening the mood.

3. If you plan to use humor in an interview, practice first. Test it on a family member or friend, and if they are not laughing, try a different approach.

4. Make sure that you use a joke as a tool to make a point, illustrate an example, and create a perception of you as a likable and pleasant professional. Attempting to use it for anything else is a mistake. Be sensitive to topics of gender, race, disability, sexual orientation, and anything else that could potentially offend.

5. Remember, if you are not funny, don't try to force it. There are plenty of other great ways to connect and be impactful.

Not sure if you're coming off funny or annoying? An interview coach can help you with that! Check out our sister site, TopInterview, today.
Recommended Reading:

Related Articles:

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How to Appropriately Use Humor in Interviews

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Do you consider yourself less serious and more of a jokester? If want you want to show that side during an interview, here are job-interview tips to consider.

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Your contradictions have to be smooth and make sense or you will appear uncoordinated.

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SUBSTITUTE VERBAL FOR NON-VERBAL COMMUNICATION

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SUBSTITUTE VERBAL FOR NON-VERBAL COMMUNICATION

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Know when it is appropriate to respond non-verbally.

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The Power of NOT Reacting - How To Control Your Emotions

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Adding contrast to your communication can make the atmosphere more casual, while not disrupting the professionalism.

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Informal Job Interview | How To Prepare For The Informal Interview 🔥

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ADD MEANING TO COMPLEMENT WHAT IS BEING SAID

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ADD MEANING TO COMPLEMENT WHAT IS BEING SAID

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Read what the other person is saying and compliment it with small movements.

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Showing empathy is part of complementing peoples verbals.

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If you asked a group of people to define ' empathy', you would almost certainly find that one of the first things that anyone suggested was ' an ability to understand other people's feelings '.

Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence, listed 'understanding others' as the first element of empathy.

Goleman also suggested, however, that understanding others is more than just sensing other people's feelings and emotions. It also means taking a genuine interest in them and their concerns.

Understanding Others - The Skills You Need

People who are good at understanding others:

Pick up emotional cues, often from body language, tone of voice, and other non-verbal elements of communication. For more about this, see our pages on Non-Verbal Communication and Body Language.

Listen well to what people are saying, actively checking their understanding. You may find it helpful to read our pages on Active Listening, Clarifying and Reflecting.

When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.
Ernest Hemingway

Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.
Stephen R. Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change

Show sensitivity towards others, and understand their perspectives. They are careful not to give offence by saying or doing the wrong thing, and are aware that not everyone has the same point of view. Our pages on Being Polite, Tact and Diplomacy and Intercultural Awareness may help you to develop this area of your skills. If you are struggling with the balance between truth, honesty and politeness, you may find our pages on Truthfulness and Balancing Honesty and Politeness helpful.

Help other people appropriately, based on their understanding of their needs and emotions.

Insights from Understanding Others

Developing empathy, and particularly the skill of understanding others, is not just important to your interpersonal relationships. It can also have a much wider impact.

For example, in the US, doctors who listen carefully to their patients are much less likely to be sued.

In one study, primary care doctors (the equivalent of general practitioners in the UK) who had never been sued were found to be much better communicators than their peers.

Empathy as economic sense: Huggies Pull-Ups

Huggies Pull-Ups were developed as a direct result of empathy in action. For those without children, these are pull-on nappies (diapers) for toddlers, an intermediate step between nappies and 'grown-up underwear'.

Kimberly-Clark, the makers of Huggies, sent observers to watch parents and toddlers using nappies. This gave the company real insight into the way that families were operating, and what products they needed. The company realised that it would be helpful to have something in between nappies and pants: a 'stepping stone' that would allow children to start getting themselves dressed. Huggies Pull-Ups were born.

The Importance of Sincerity

It is possible to pretend that you understand people's feelings and, more particularly, their concerns. Sales staff often do this to try to establish rapport with customers.
However, as humans we are programmed to detect and dislike insincerity.
Your pretence, it is fair to say, will be detected by those around you, probably through subtle hints in your body language, or perhaps in a response to an unexpected question.

The other person may not even be aware of detecting it, but will feel uncomfortable with the conversation that you have tried to strike up, or with what you are saying, and find that they do not really trust you.
In other words, this 'false empathy' will be counter-productive.
Trying to manipulate emotions can backfire on the perpetrator, and may well not be worthwhile. Those who are genuinely empathetic will get a very different response.

Empathy Avoidance and Empathy Overload

There are two aspects of understanding others and being interested in their concerns that, as part of empathy, are worth exploring further.

The first, empathy avoidance, is a deliberate lack of empathy, which might be called 'emotional tone-deafness'.

Total empathy avoidance is unlikely to be healthy for your long-term relationships, but being able to shut down some of your empathetic response may be helpful under certain circumstances. For example:

At Home. Children need to receive certain vaccinations. In their first few months of life, they have several vaccinations, sometimes two or three at a time. Having a needle stuck into their legs hurts, and babies scream when it happens.

Parents, however, need to clamp down on their immediate response and recognise the long-term benefits of vaccination, in avoiding serious diseases, rather than focus on the short-term distress of the child.

At Work. Managers responsible for making redundancies need to be able to make good decisions. They are unlikely to be able to do so if they are struggling with their own emotional response to the distress of those around them.

While it is important that they remain aware of the feelings of those involved, they have to be able to balance that with the use of reason and logic and not be overwhelmed.

In Healthcare. A surgeon performing emergency surgery on someone who has had serious injuries in a road traffic accident needs to be able to use all their skills to try to repair the damage, or amputate if necessary to save the patient's life. They cannot spend time considering how this might make the patient feel.

However, after the operation is over, and the person is awake, they need to explain their actions and help the patient to start to come to terms with whatever has happened. They need to remain aware of their patient as a person, with feelings and concerns, and respond appropriately.

Empathy overload sometimes happens when people are exposed to difficult and distressing information.

In such situations people can find themselves unable to deal with their own emotional response to the situation. This can happen, for example, if you find that a friend is seriously ill. You want to help and support them, but you are too upset to do so. It is also a problem that can arise for people working in professions like medicine, nursing and social work.

The way to manage possible empathy overload is to work on your self-regulation, and particularly your self-control. With improved self-regulation, you will be able to manage your own emotions and respond appropriately to those of others.

Understanding Others is not 'Soft'

We often talk about '', and there is no question that empathy, and understanding others are important soft skills.

There is, however, absolutely nothing soft, in the sense of ' easy ', about understanding others' concerns and feelings. Neither is it 'soft' in the sense of not being tough: the best managers are empathetic, but not 'soft' on their team.

Understanding others does not mean that you have to agree with their feelings or point of view. Instead, it means that you recognise their point of view, and accept that it is different from yours.

You may still have to do difficult things that others do not agree with, but hopefully, both you and they understand that.

Further Reading from Skills You Need
Understanding and Developing Emotional Intelligence
Learn more about emotional intelligence and how to effectively manage personal relationships at home, at work and socially.

Our eBooks are ideal for anyone who wants to learn about or develop their interpersonal skills and are full of easy-to-follow, practical information.

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If you asked a group of people to define ' empathy', you would almost certainly find that one of the first things that anyone suggested was ' an ability to understand other people's feelings '. Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence, listed 'understanding others' as the first element of empathy.

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Complementing what the other person is saying through action can make them feel understood, improving your likability.

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Affirm your verbals with non-verbals.

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Communicating non-verbally can be more efficient.

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Seeing a message can be more effective than hearing a message.

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USE MOVEMENT TO INDICATE YOUR DESIRE TO HAVE VERBAL CONTROL

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USE MOVEMENT TO INDICATE YOUR DESIRE TO HAVE VERBAL CONTROL

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Use physical suggestions to show you want a turn to speak.

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Non-verbally communicating that you want to speak is the polite way to interact with others.

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Verbal interruption in unacceptable, be subtle with non-verbals.

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How to Stop Interrupting People:  Improve Communication Skills

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Social Briefing #8: How to Ask Open vs. Closed Questions

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The ability to ask good open-ended questions is important for small talk with both strangers and old acquaintances alike.

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Show that you want verbal control with movements that don't interrupt the conversation.

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Convey understanding and interest.

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USE ACCENT OR TONE IN YOUR SPEECH TO HIGHLIGHT IMPORTANCE

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USE ACCENT OR TONE IN YOUR SPEECH TO HIGHLIGHT IMPORTANCE

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Use tone to your advantage, you can come off as professional and respectable by monitoring your placement of accents in speech.

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Don't be overexcited or loud when talking. But still use positive accents to come off as more likable.

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Tone adds punctuation to speech.

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Verbal Punctuation - The Executive Advisory

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Use an accent of importance when going through resume and accomplishments, really sell yourself.

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Write an Incredible Resume: 5 Golden Rules!

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Substituting words with actions will save you time and stress on how to sound professional.

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How you sound affects the impact you'll have on the listener.

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Key points

People are more sensitive to tone than to the explicit content of spoken or written language, and a sharp tone can hurt others.

Shifting one's tone doesn't mean becoming sugary or phony. In fact, paying attention to tone can make people stronger communicators.

When one is already in a critical frame of mind, taking a break or dealing with feelings directly can help people avoid a harsh tone.

Feeling a little sour?
The Practice:

The tone of your voice is important.

Why?

Tone matters.

I remember times I felt frazzled or aggravated and then said something with an edge to it that just wasn't necessary or useful. Sometimes it was the words themselves: such as absolutes like "never" or always," or over-the-top phrases like "you're such a flake" or "that was stupid." More often, it was the intonation in my voice, a harsh vibe or look, interrupting, or a certain intensity in my body. However, I did it, and the people on the receiving end usually looked like they'd just sucked a lemon. This is what I mean by tart tone.

People are more sensitive to tone than to the explicit content of spoken or written language. To paraphrase the poet Maya Angelou, people will forget what you said, but they'll remember how you made them feel. And we are particularly reactive to negative tones due to the negativity bias in the brain (written about in previous posts).

Consequently, a tart tone hurts others. This is bad enough, but it also often triggers others to react in ways that harm you and others.

On the other hand, paying attention to tone puts you more in touch with yourself because you have to be aware of what's building inside-promoting mindfulness and builds up its neural substrates. Containing negative tones prompts you to open to and deal with any underlying stress, hurt, anger. It reduces the chance that the other person will avoid dealing with what you say by shifting attention to how you say it. Cleaning up your style of expression puts you in a stronger position to ask people to do the same or act better toward you in other ways.

As a proverb says, "Getting angry with others is like throwing hot coals with bare hands: both people get burned." Much the same could be said about throwing tart tone.

How?

Shifting your tone doesn't mean becoming sugary, saccharine, or phony. Nor does it mean walking on eggshells, becoming a doormat, or muzzling yourself. Actually, when people shift away from being snippy, curt, snarky, derisive, or contentious, they usually become stronger communicators. They're now more grounded, more dignified when they bring up something. They haven't squandered interpersonal capital on the short-term gratifications of harsh tone.

Sometimes people are tart with each other in playful ways, and that's OK. But keep watching to see how it's landing on the other person.

Be mindful of what's called " priming": feeling already mistreated, annoyed, irritated-or already in a critical frame of mind. Little things can land on this priming like a match on a pile of firecrackers, setting them off. Maybe simply take a break (e.g., bathroom, meal, shower, run, gardening, TV) to clear away some or all of the priming. And/or try to deal with hurt, anger, or stress in a straightforward way (if possible), rather than blowing off steam with your tone.

Then, if you do, in fact, get triggered, notice what comes up to say. If it's critical, acerbic, cutting, etc., then slow down, say nothing, or say something truly useful. Watch those eye rolls or the sharp sigh that means "Duh-oh, that was kind of dumb" (my wife has called me on both of these). Give a little thought to your choice of words: Could there be a way to say what you want to say without pouring gasoline on the fire? Look for words that are accurate, constructive, self-respecting, and get to the heart of the matter. Be especially careful with an email; once you push the "send" button, there is no getting it back, and the receiver can read your message over and over again, plus share it with others.

If you do slip, clean it up as soon as possible-which could be a minute after you say it. Sometimes it works to explain-not justify or defend-the underlying reasons for your tart tone (e.g., you're fried and hungry, and it's been a tough day) to put it in context. Take responsibility for your tone and its impacts, and recommit to a clearer, cleaner, more direct way of expressing yourself.

At the end of an interaction, you may not get the result you want from the other person-but you can get the result of self-respect and feeling that you did the best you could.
Facebook image: Mangostar/Shutterstock
LinkedIn image: Josep Suria/Shutterstock

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Why the Tone of Your Voice Makes Such a Difference

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Shifting your tone doesn't mean being phony; it's about being grounded.

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Being contradictory can show that you posses humor, which increases the amount of positive qualities you display.

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By having the same verbal and non-verbal message you demonstrate an air of consistency which makes people comfortable.

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Throughout my career, I've strived to stay consistent about consistency. Even the best business plans will fail without a dedication to consistency.

If I say I'm going to do something, I do it. If I say I'm going to be somewhere, I'm there. If I initiate a new business process or initiative, I follow through. In my experience, consistency is a must as you build and grow your business.

Here's why:
1. Consistency allows for measurement.
Until you have tried something new for a period of time and in a consistent manner, you can't decide if it works or not. How do you measure effectiveness if what you are measuring isn't performed consistently?

I typically give new initiatives, processes, and organizational structures at least six months before judging them a success or failure. It's often minor tweaking instead of major overhauls that make the difference.
2. Consistency creates accountability.
I ask my employees to be accountable for their deliverables and goals. They should expect the same in return from my leadership. I put a priority on making time for and being available to my team. I work to establish consistent and recurring meetings when a project or aspect of the business requires attention.

The simple fact that there is a set time to report on progress is often the catalyst that moves an initiative along to a successful end.
3. Consistency establishes your reputation.
Business growth requires a track record of success. You can't establish a track record if you are constantly shifting gears or trying new tactics. Many efforts fail before they get to the finish line, but not because the tactic was flawed or goals weren't clear. The problem is often that the team simply didn't stay the course to achieve the objective.
4. Consistency makes you relevant.
Your employees and your customers need a predictable flow of information from you. All too often I see businesses, both small and large, adopt a campaign or initiative only to end it before it gains traction. It's effective to run many advertisements, numerous blog entries, weekly newsletters, or continual process changes throughout a year.
5. Consistency maintains your message.
Your team pays as much or more attention to what you do as to what you say. Consistency in your leadership serves as a model for how they will behave. If you treat a meeting as unimportant, don't be surprised when you find they are doing the same to fellow teammates or even customers.

When something doesn't work, I look back at what happened and ask some serious questions. Did we shift gears too quickly? Did part of the team not deliver on a commitment? Or was the expected outcome off base from the start? Most of the time, the reason tracks back to lack of consistency.

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Throughout my career, I've strived to stay consistent about consistency. Even the best business plans will fail without a dedication to consistency. If I say I'm going to do something, I do it. If I say I'm going to be somewhere, I'm there. If I initiate a new business process or initiative, I follow through.

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If someone doesn’t respond to your non-verbal cue, that doesn’t mean you should interrupt.

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View all job-seeker themed posts View all employer themed posts
In today's fast-paced society, speed often trumps courtesy. We've become accustomed to countless interruptions each day: expecting (and even welcoming) impromptu visits, text messages, social media alerts, or the click of an incoming call during a conversation.

Yet, most of us would agree that being interrupted mid-sentence during a conversation still triggers a pang of irritation. Although interrupting may have become more commonplace; it's no less rude than it's always been.

Read on to find out why interrupting can be a career killer, why you do it, and how to stop.

Why is interrupting bad for your career?

Think about it this way, how do you feel when you're interrupted mid-sentence? Most likely, you feel that the person you're talking to is more concerned with their opinion; and doesn't really care what you have to say. Their impatience might cause you to feel disrespected or unimportant; or just plain annoyed if you lose your train of thought. People seldom want to work with (or promote) people who make them feel this way.

Nevertheless, interrupting is a shockingly common habit. Hiring managers have often mentioned to me that although a candidate had a great skillset, they weren't interested in moving forward. Why? The candidate had continuously interrupted the hiring manager's questions or responses during the interview. Even former President Obama isn't exempt from being interrupted: in a debate with Mitt Romney, he commented that he was used to being interrupted.

Lack of self awareness: Not realizing you interrupt others.

Fear of forgetting what you want to say (stemming from impatience; nervousness; or planning what to say next, instead of actively listening).

Desire to prove expertise to peers or superiors on the topic being discussed.

Need for belonging: you want to be a part of the conversation, but there are no breaks in the conversation. Each time you try to chime in; someone beats you to the punch; or one person monopolizes the conversation.

Cooperative interruption: an attempt to relate to the person speaking; by making positive affirmations (e.g. "I completely understand!") or sharing your own story.

Competitive interruption: an attempt to change the topic to further your own agenda; or to gain the audience's attention.

Everyone else interrupts: Interrupting is common in your workgroup, culture or family.

You're excited or passionate about the topic at hand; which can make it difficult to wait your turn.

Why do you interrupt?

Carry a small notebook and jot down your thoughts as they occur. Given time, the speaker will often address the point or question naturally during the course of their conversation. If not, writing it removes the fear of forgetting the thought. An added bonus: taking brief notes during a conversation comes across as conscientious.

Challenge ourselves to stay quiet. Those of us who interrupt are often the "talkers" in a conversation. But, have you ever noticed that people listen most attentively to those who speak infrequently, but with thoughtful consideration? Removing the pressure to contribute to the conversation helps you to focus on what others are saying.

Enlist a friend or colleague to tip you off if you're interrupting. Although it's tempting to hide our weaknesses from others, there's no shame in admitting to someone you trust that you're working to improve yourself. Decide on a discreet signal for a colleague to give you if you're breaking into a conversation.

Don't assume a pause is necessarily the end of a discussion. If you're eager to join a conversation, you may jump in as soon as the person pauses. However, some people pause to make an impact or collect their thoughts. Pay attention to their tone of voice and allow a moment before responding.

Put a finger over your lips or close your mouth tight as a physical reminder to listen attentively.

If you accidentally interrupt, quickly apologize and allow the speaker to continue. Simply saying, "I'm sorry, go on" or "Sorry, you weren't finished" is enough.

If you must interrupt, do so politely. In some cases, you need to interrupt: such as when you don't understand; have to leave a meeting that is running over; or a colleague is telling a client incorrect information that could jeopardize a deal. In these cases, try to wait for a pause; then say, "I'm sorry to interrupt, but..."

In order to break a bad habit, it's important to understand the motivations behind your actions. Some of the most common reasons for interrupting include:

How do you stop interrupting?

Recognize when you should allow others to interrupt you

When you're working so hard to refrain from interrupting, it can be frustrating when someone interrupts you. However, if the person is more senior to you; it's best to stop talking and let them continue. Unless you have an exceptionally close relationship, "managing up" and pointing out the interruption will likely be seen as disrespectful; which can lead to trouble.

...And when you shouldn't

In cases where the person consistently interrupting you isn't senior to you, you have a few options. If you continue talking, most people will get the hint. For times when a less subtle approach is needed; you can hold up your hand to indicate you're not finished, then say "Wait, I'm not finished" or "I'll get to that" in a calm tone of voice. If the person is a friend or a direct report, you may want to take them aside and discuss the issue.

Check out our latest job opportunities >

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Avoid this career killer: 7 tips for how to stop interrupting and why you do it. Recognize when it's okay for others to interrupt you - and when it isn't.

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Do not sound disrespectful or haughty when speaking.

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Conveying the same message non-verbally and verbally can show that you have the ability to comfortable in a work setting by being sure of yourself.

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Non-verbals can be contradictory with verbals, but verbals cannot be contradictory with verbals.

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Pay attention to when the other person gestures that you have verbal control. Gestures such as raising their eyebrows or tilting their head.

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For some, it is easier to remember information when your verbal message is accompanied by an action/non-verbal.

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Don't be too repetitive.

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When you get rattled while speaking - whether you're nervous, distracted, or at a loss for what comes next - it's easy to lean on filler words, such as "um," "ah," or "you know." These words can become crutches that diminish our credibility and distract from our message. To eliminate such words from your speech, replace them with pauses. To train yourself to do this, take these three steps. First, identify your crutch words and pair them with an action. Every time you catch yourself saying "like," for example, tap your leg. Once you've become aware of your filler words as they try to escape your lips, begin forcing yourself to be silent. Finally, practice more than you think you should. The optimal ratio of preparation to performance is one hour of practice for every minute of presentation.

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How to Stop Saying "Um," "Ah," and "You Know"

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When you get rattled while speaking - whether you're nervous, distracted, or at a loss for what comes next - it's easy to lean on filler words, such as "um," "ah," or "you know." These words can become crutches that diminish our credibility and distract from our message.