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In “Is Homosexual a Noun”, Abramson and Pinkerton brought forth the idea of what a homosexual is. This reminded me that although many people might identify different with what they believe homosexuality to be, to me it is a burden. A chip on my shoulder to hide because my family loves and accepts me during my success but rejects me for my “preference” or “identity”. It could be a preference as stated in the essay or my identity, either way a burden.

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In “The Social Construction of Difference: Race, Class, Gender, and Sexuality”, by J. Lorber, he speaks on the devaluation of women and the way women are seen to be below men. “Gender inequality~-the devaluation of "women" and the social domination of “men". has social functions and a social history. It is not the result of sex, procre-

ation, physiology, anatomy, hormones, or genetic predispositions. It is produced and maintained by identifiable social processes and built into the general social structure and individual identities deliberately and purposefully.” In this birthday, I experienced the pressure to find a husband in order for me to be married and with kids by 30. I was told every year I would devalue and women are “genetically” at their “prime” in their 20s. I refuse to believe this none sense but the pressure I undoubtedly feel by society has only heightened.

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After rejecting my homosexuality and falling into the expectations put upon me by my family to be a Godly women with a family im finally pregnant. Until Im not. Then what? Am I still a women if I cant bare children? Should I still try and marry in my “prime” if I cant create a family? What now?

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The idea of the Guadalupe being a badass motivates me. To be strong in all aspects not just mentally but physically. To lift heavy despite ruining my precious feminine hands. Cisneros in “Guadalupe the sex Goddess” talks about Coatlicue, the creative/destructive goddess. Thats who I want to be. A women enraged and angry but extremely powerful.

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The concept of femme fatale was brought forth by Martin in “The Sperm and The Egg”. A deviant women, an aggressive women. Adjectives some would consider bad but to me they are inspiring. It is an act of rebellion to be deviant and aggressive in a society where being soft and nurturing is the norm. I want to have a smile on my face when I am laid to rest knowing I did what I wanted.