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"The hardest decisions often lead to the greatest growth, and the love you give is the love that always finds you in return."

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My siblings and I during wedding celebrations.

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I grew up in a big, noisy family in Pakistan—four brothers, and us four sisters. Our house was full of laughter, fights, and endless late-night discussions. We’d watch movies together, argue over the smallest things, and then make up like nothing had happened. It was chaos, but it was beautiful. My favorite memories are of all of us crammed into one room, obsessing over outer space and its many galaxies. I didn’t realize it at the time, but those moments were shaping me. They taught me how to love, how to forgive, and how to find joy in the simplest things. I miss those moments every single day. Life felt so uncomplicated then, but of course, that’s how childhood always seems—perfectly carefree.

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When I started my architecture associate degree, I didn’t know how much it would change me. It was a three-year program, and I poured everything I had into it. My best friend, Sabina, was my biggest competition, and we both knew it. One semester, she secured the highest marks, and that pushed me to work even harder. I studied late into the night, over and over again, until I was confident. When I finally got the first position, it was such a proud moment. I’ll never forget that day. It was one of the happiest days of my life. It felt like all my effort had been worth it. That achievement wasn’t just about the marks; it was about proving to myself that hard work pays off.

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My parents always taught us to value hard work. I started working when I was young, and it’s one of the best things I ever did. Working at an early age made me more responsible and organized, and it taught me the value of money. When you work for something yourself, you appreciate it so much more. That lesson stayed with me, and it’s something I think every young person should experience. It prepares you for life in ways you don’t even realize at the time.

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A sketch of my favorite memory from my childhood: when my siblings and I would sit on our roof and look up at the stars together.

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Years later, when I received my U.S. green card, I faced one of the toughest decisions of my life. I could have stayed in Pakistan, gotten married, and built a life there. But my family was in the U.S.—every single one of my siblings. Family is everything to me, so I decided to leave everything I knew behind and move to the U.S. It wasn’t easy. I had to start over in a place that felt foreign, away from the friends and life in Pakistan I had always known. But I knew in my heart it was the right decision. I chose family, and looking back, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

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This is me with a few of my siblings and cousins back in Pakistan.

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As I got older, I started to see life differently. In my twenties, I realized how much I had taken for granted when I was younger. My siblings and I were so close—we relied on each other for everything. But as they started getting married, things changed. Their priorities shifted, and suddenly, the bond we had felt different. It’s a hard reality to accept. For a while, I felt lost. But over time, I came to understand that this is just life. People grow, they move forward, and they build their own lives. The one constant for me was my faith. That’s when I truly realized that Allah is always there, through the good times and the bad. He loves us no matter what, and that gave me strength during some of my loneliest moments.

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This is me with my daughter, Eshal, at a Thanksgiving party.

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A video of me with my youngest son, Humza.

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A picture my husband took of me during our honeymoon in India.

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If I could tell young people one thing, it would be this: don’t waste your youth. Focus on your studies, set goals, and surround yourself with good people—people who inspire you and make you better. Don’t fall into bad habits; they can ruin everything. And start working young. It’s not just about earning money; it’s about understanding responsibility, learning discipline, and preparing yourself for the real world. Those lessons will stay with you for life.

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Sometimes I think about the life I’ve lived and how far I’ve come. From a little girl in a crowded house full of laughter and dreams to a woman who had to make hard decisions and start over in a new country. It hasn’t been easy, but every challenge has shaped me into who I am. I’ve learned that life is about finding balance—between ambition and contentment, between family and independence. Most of all, I’ve learned to rely on Allah, because at the end of the day, He is the one who never leaves you. These lessons are the foundation of my life, and I wouldn’t trade them for anything.