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Last year, I taught a class of moderate autistic students with behavioral challenges. 3/4 of the students in the class were high needs students. It was like going to a battlefield everyday.
My co teacher and I often had to take turns whenever there was a meltdown and we often need to get a male teacher from another class to handle our students who were big and tall, 16 years old and stand at 1.7m to 1.82m.  We felt that we had big responsibilities to ensure these students were at their best behavior. We realised that the students were often punished at home even if they do not follow simple rules. There were little explanation on the consequences of their behavior at home. Hence, their behavior was always abrupt in school. Parents wanted us to follow their parenting which was punishing the students such as: cannot buy favourite meal during recess, cannot go swimming lesson, cannot join favourite lesson. Although we know that this was not the right way, we were  inclined to use it as the students react to this punishment very diligently. However, my co teacher and I realised that these boys were teenagers and they seemed tired being tied up to rules from the moment they wake up to the time they go to bed. Hence, we initiated with the IEP team to introduce parents to teach these boys the consequences of their behavior. Such as hitting the public items is considered vandalism, making unnecessary behaviours in public is public nuisance and these are against Singapore Law. Not just 'mommy's law'. They loved Crime Watch. Hence we showed them certain impacts that those behaviours have on others.

After several lessons and practices, the students were more aware not just for themselves but for Singapore. It is a small step that both my co and I took. As our students were very patriotic and loved this country so much. They sang the national day's songs almost every day and wanted to be fair to the Singaporeans. A drastic positive change in their behaviours were seen in a span of 1 year. In this stage, I see that teenagers regardless if they are on the spectrum or not, like to be given the autonomy on their lives. Instant punishment can solve the instant bad behaviours but it will only build more anger for the child. Hence, by showing them the consequences and how they can actually contribute to be a better citizen, it helps them to be fair and equal to everybody hence taking responsibility for their own actions.
Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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I was given the opportunity to work with an ASD_ADHD boy whom I looked forward to meeting up, weekly. He is funny and is always punctual for every session.. because of snack corner. Until one fine day, he stormed into my office.

He shared that one of his classmates who was also one of his good friends, had thrown a nasty remarks on him. I knew that he was angry as he continuously drank the water that I gave him to cool him down. I thought I saw him drank more than 3 cups? By knowing his usual character, I had knew that he would rather let the matter rest and avoided the situation calmly. He felt that it was just a minor situation of someone verbalising his thoughts fiercely at him . (But wasn’t it so obvious that he was angry) To him,  informing his form teacher on the situation was not necessary. Yet of course, on my part, I assisted to find him a solution together; a temporary alternative for him to try out.

Unexpectedly the bullying did not stop there. This time round it had gotten beyond the limits and he was involved in a fight although subtly. Sadly, his other friends who were nearby acted as a bystanders. To cut the story short, courageously, the boy ended up informing his form teacher.

As an educator, I would firstly consider where my students' personal development lies in terms of Kohlberg's six stages.

As bullying is constituted as a serious offence, for my own self-reminder, to understand that the process after bullying incident is to intervene immediately, apply appropriate consequences for the perpetrators and most importantly, to invoke teachable moment on the right and wrong on the appropriate treatment on others and tolerance for differences. I believe this will help to discourage further bullying and create healthy relationship with friends.

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On 19th March 2009 (nine days after my birthday), it the darkest day in my life.  The company that I work with retrenches me on that day. The retrenches benefit was way above the law of Singapore required.  It consists of a 1-month extra salary for every year I work. In Kohlberg's Theory of Moral Development, it is at level 3 stage 5 as the socially agreed-upon standard determines the company's choice rather than the law.
I decide not to tell my family member as it does not helps in any way except for extra worry for them.  It is a lie, but the intention is good.
I spend the next two years doing some soul search, and the final decision is joined MOE.  The objective is two folds 1) help me children maneuver in the system;  2) wanting to bridge the school with industrial.
Looking back, I should be thankful to my director, who submitted my name for the retrenchment exercise.  Retrenchment is a bit more remote now as compared to the private sector.
Reply: I am glad that you have reflected and looked back positively. Good for you!  Rather than your company, you are demonstrating that you are on
Level 3 - Post-conventional morality, as you have decided to 'tell a white lie'. Thank you for sharing with us!

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A few years back, I decided to take up Post Graduate Certification for Education via distant learning. Tough, really tough! I thought I was a superwoman - juggling work, home and school. I forgot about self-care. My health suffered, I slipped into an unhealthy state of mind. I lost sense of self, I couldn’t sleep, I would be very irritable and couldn’t focus on anything. Everything went downhill and it was a difficult time of my life. Everyone said “just hold on, it’s a waste to let go (of my studies) since you paid for the whole course (very expensive!)”

I made a few decisions, albeit painful ones, I chose life. Money could be earned, true friends and loved ones will stick by you no matter what happens. I quit my course, packed up my belongings and focused on my mental health, happiness and walked forward.

I am most happy now and those decisions I made were the best! Hey, I wouldn’t be here in this module if I didn’t make those decisions right?

Linking back to the lesson today: certain choices made may not be the best, but if it were to be for the greater good, everything will pan out perfect.

Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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I was tagged to a P4 class in 2018. 1 tough class. I was tasked to help with classroom management. The class had a new form and English teacher who switched from a secondary school. She was trying to get use to teaching primary students hence the extra support.
It was one of the best class but with 7 to 8 students who are like 'timebombs'. I kept records of the behavioural issues and trust me, you wouldn't want to read them... 4 to 5 pages of them daily. 1 particular student though hated me, to the core. He told me that twice or more times daily, in my face. He has ASD, with high IQ. He doesn't like me near his desk or touching his things. Every morning, he greeted the teachers in the classroom along with the others then went to me to tell me to 'GET OUT OF HIS CLASS'. I honestly have no idea why the major resentment towards me.
When I spoke to my AED LBS (he became my mentor during my stint), he said that that student have had difficulty trusting new teachers. He trusted 2 teachers, 1 resigned and 1 passed away. It was really not easy to get and be in his good books.
I was pregnant in semester 2 so i chose to do the soft approach for classroom management. While some strategies worked, some didnt. Well, the strategies OBVIOUSLY didn't work on THAT particular student. I continued to model behaviours opposite of what he does to me.
1. I greeted him every morning and said hi whenever i bumped into him around the school.
2. I approached him in class whenever he raised his hands for help. I asked him if i could help.
3. I gave emphasis to manners like 'please', 'thank you', 'you are welcome', 'may i', etc
4. I placed his books and other things on his desk nicely and neatly.
5. I ensured him that I will listen to both sides of the story to find the root cause of disagreements that happened in class.
6. I kept my promise to reward him or others when tasks were completed and submitted.
Last year, I was not tagged to the same class or students but I do see him around the school and I still smile and greet him. Fast forward to this year, during the CB HBL period, I was tasked to do check-ins with him via phonecalls on alternate days. It took a while for him to get use to talking to me but i took the chance to built rapport and really listen to him. Before I left for AED LBS course, I met him and told him that I would be going back to study. He said, "Mdm Shima, take care ar!"
That was 1 of the sweetest and nicest thing he had ever said to me.
Linking back to the lesson today, I used my classroom management skills to promote moral development by modelling, creating a safe space and by letting him experience that prosocial behaviour. It took a long time for a student with ASD to realise how much his actions have affected me in the past. It was a big leap to see him move from conventional to moral domain.
Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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I remember it was back in secondary school when my class was having a Geography mock exam as the 'N' Level was around the corner. Halfway through the exam, I saw two of my friends flipping through their textbook under the table to look for answers. I am pretty sure they know that was considered an act of dishonesty but they did it anyway because to them, it is just a mock exam. Besides, if they were not aware of the consequences of cheating, they wouldn't have hid the book under the table. Relating to Piaget's Theory of Moral Development, they were at the stage of Moral realism, whereby they knew cheating is an unacceptable behaviour and nothing will happen to them as long as they don't get caught.

Next day after the mock exam, my Geography teacher called up me and my three other friends, of which two of them were the ones who cheated during the exam. We took turns to meet her at her office and when it was my turn, she asked me if I knew that my friends cheated during the mock exam. I was shocked that she found out about this incident and at the same time, struggling to answer her question. On one hand, if I were to answer truthfully based on what I saw, I will end up losing the friendship, but if I were to not tell her the truth, I will disappoint my teacher (Kohlberg's Theory of Moral Development; Level 2, Stage 3). On the other hand, I was being brought up with values that are aligned with what is morally right. I know that it is not right to "help" my friends by not telling the truth. One, because it is unfair to the rest of my classmates when they were the ones who put in the effort in this mock exam. Two, I will, in a way, stop my friends from realising the consequences of cheating, which may lead to them repeating this inappropriate behaviour over and over again. And three, it is definitely against my values if I were to hide the truth from my teacher (Kohlberg's Theory of Moral Development; Level 3).

It took me close to 15 minutes to give my teacher an answer, and I chose to tell her the truth. As I stepped out of the office, instead of feeling upset that I may lose my friends, I felt I did the right thing (Aha!). From then, I strongly uphold my values and making that choice to tell the truth allowed me to have a better sense of myself. These eventually led me to where I am now and I am proud to live by my own values.
Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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Completing secondary school for most people probably leaves them feeling relieved and excited. New journey and adventure awaits. However, for me, it was rather confusing and anxious as I had to make a choice. A life decision. Where would I head to next, and where will this leads to, is this the correct option, what if this doesn't work out, will my family agree to this, will I make them proud? I had all these questions in my head. I had a course in mind that I was keen to pursue, however, my family strongly would like me to pursue another.

And thankfully for me, they weren't exactly forceful for me to pursue what they think was good for me, for it has greater and wider prospects in the near future. But it was like a "reverse psychology" leaving me with feeling guilty, if I were to proceed with what I wanted, as I knew they weren't exactly thrilled of my choice. And at that age, you were questioning yourself too, and trusting adults more than yourself. What would I know at 16 years old? I hadn't had my future carefully thought out. So trying to be the obedient daughter, I follow suit with what my family thought would be good for me. I proceed and went through the course of my family's choice but I wasn't really happy and felt unsatisfied. Something was just not right. But I persevered on to close to a year and that's when I call it quits. It was the riskiest move and decision I've ever made and I withdrew from that course (being aware that my name being blacklisted from entering similar course again), and without securing a place yet in the course that I wanted, I took that leap. I was on my own, without my family's knowledge nor approval, I was out of school until the next enrollment intake starts.

To cut the story short, I was so so grateful and lucky that I secured myself a place into the course that I wanted the following year! After the agonizing wait and uncertainty for that few-long-months, it was indeed a horrifying experience yet a fruitful one. And it was the best decision I ever made, although it took a longer ride with the mix emotions and guilt, it was worth it. How my family took it? They were a little skeptical in the beginning but they see that I was definitely happier and learn to understand my perspective and supported me. :)

From what I've learnt in today's session, I felt that it is important to have a strong personal belief and proceed with what I feel will work out for myself (for self pleasure and intrinsic reward) because, ultimately, it is my life. And that we shouldn't live to please others (as much as we want to) because in the end, it's even worst when you have to live with that guilt towards yourself, and life is too short to waste it in this manner. Choices have to be made and it's never easy nor always turns out perfect, but if you can justify why that choice was made, then things will fall into place.
Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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I used to have this P1 student, undiagnosed, but shows ASD traits. He has oral sensory issues and would always put things in his mouth. He would put in pencils, rulers, his fingers and especially loves blue tacks. He would go around the classroom to steal bluetacks from the wall. He secretly goes to the back of the classroom, when the teacher is not looking and steal those bluetacks. He would also take other classmate's stationaries without permission and put them in his mouth.
His actions could not be tolerated by everyone. He refused to listen to anyone, except his mum.
So we work together with his mum, form teacher, student care teacher and AEDs, to introduce visual cues and reward system to him. We explained to him the expected behaviour, and the rewards that he would get in returned. We told him the consequences of taking other people's belongings without permission and that he would hurt other people's feelings if he were to do so. We further explained about the right and wrong behaviours and came out with an agreement that he have to follow through. He was taught the basic principles of right, wrong and justice - Moral domain.
Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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I had a student during my stint who was so afraid of her mother after the CB period. She would constantly confide in me and my colleague that her mother hates her, even when she was doing well and we told her we want to call her mother to inform her she cried, shaking and begging us not to. She also would express her sadness because she did not look like everyone else as she is disable. She longed to have a hand and fingers so she could do the things that the other kids could and when anything happened to her like other kids made fun of she would have a meltdown or do something out of anger like taking the marker and drawing on her PE T-shirt or she may hit the student and stalk the students. She also felt conscious about how others view her. She was overwhelmed with school and had difficulty controlling her anger.
She also displayed other behaviours that made us feel that she should attend counselling however, the year head was her mother's ex-student and when we approached her she felt that my student was being "dramatic" and told us to understand how the mother feels as it might be difficult for her with a child like her instead of look at things from the child's perspective. She told us not to refer the student for counselling but this bothered me. On one hand, I knew that if I kept quiet this child would suffer in silence, there would be more meltdowns and if I approach others it would cause the year head to be upset and I might have conflict with her in the future as an ex-lbs was reprimanded for not listening to her before.
It is my personal believe that counselling is not a bad things as I myself have gone for it and it really helped me. Somehow there is a stigma about going for counselling. We made a decision to approach her form teacher to ask for her opinion. She agreed that she should be referred for counselling.
I told her to air our concerns to her mother and see if she was keen on the daughter attending counselling as she has been have some issues at home too. When she called her mothers broke down and agreed that her daughter needed counselling.

Linking it to today's lesson, I felt that Kohlberg's Level 3 - Post-conventional morality  best described how I felt it was based on my principle to do what's best for the child and my beliefs even if it was met by disapproval from others. I wanted her to be treated just like another other child and not a child with GDD, MID or handicapped therefore, she is deemed as "difficult" or "dramatic". Her condition does not dictate her emotional well-being and I am glad I made the decision as it has helped her.
Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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One of my positive AHA moments was, I once had a P3 student who is diagnose with autism. He has difficulty expressing himself and has the tendency to take his friends stationery without their permission. He is not able to verbalise his thoughts and unable to read their emotions (if they are angry or unhappy).
So to promote prosocial and moral values, I had the chance to teach him social skills to learn how to ask permission. This itself teaches him to respect his friends also. I also had some role play with him as a concrete reference point and also teach him some moral issues. From this role play, he was able to tell me that it is morally not right to take other people's things. After a while, he manage to control this behaviour of taking things and understood that it is not right to take things from others as it will upset his friends.
Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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I once had a situation where a parent of my student wanted to borrow some money from me to tide him over. I am very friendly with my caregivers and over time we also form some friendships along the way. So when this incident happened, i was at a loss of what i should do.

The morality conflict came in, because my personal belief was to help others around me and knowing the parent situation, i felt that i should have lend the money. However, i was also reminded of our school conduct and SOW (moral and conventional domain) that we shouldn't do this. I also went ahead to consult with my co-teacher about this and we decided to bring up the matter to the social worker. The good thing was that it worked and the family was better supported.

Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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Last year, I taught a potential ASD class where students with ASD have the potential to be integrated into a MID class. Towards the end of last year,  I had to submit the names of my students whom I think are ready to be integrated into a MID class the following year.  After an in-depth discussion with the school psychologist, I filled in the required documents and submitted the names of all my students except a girl. It was a really difficult decision to make because we knew that she would miss all her friends and/or her self-esteem might be affected. However, we felt that she needed more time to work on a specific skill. Thus, we decided to hold her back for another year and continue to place her in an ASD class. This year, she is in my class and I know I have made the right decision back then when I noticed the drastic improvement in the area that she needs to work on.

Linking to today's session, the moral as well as personal and psychosocial qualities resonate with me as I reflect on the decision-making process I have gone through and made back then. I know that it is unethical to integrate a student if he/she is not ready and I agreed not to integrate the student because I wanted the child to feel safe and happy in a new learning environment.
Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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Once, I had a student who likes to call and label his peers as 'fat'. This behavior causes his peers to be ashamed of their body image and not attend school for a several days. As this behavior is morally wrong, I sat down and spoke to him.

In relation to today's topic, I asked him whether it was right for him to do that to his peers? I told him that he is shaming his peers which is wrong. How would he feel if he was labeled and called names instead? Understanding his mistakes, he called his peers and apologized to them. This lesson has taught him to be respective of his peers, regardless of their race, size and colour.
Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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3 years ago, after my son was born, I  could not cope with work and him. I was working long hours and unable to spend quality time with him and I felt guilty. There was no work-life balance. I was also getting tired at work and was stressed at work. Part of me was telling me to leave the job immediately but the other told me I shouldn't before securing another job. My family and friends encouraged me to leave as soon as I can advised me to take a break and spend time with my son. It was very hard for me and I had to think through so much before I  finally left my job.

I was in a dilemma as I was brought up thinking that as a mother I have to be physically and emotionally present for my child at all times but at the same time at the current situation both husband and wife has to work in order to financially run the family.  And also, what would people think if I am jobless/ That was my biggest worry. But there is no right and wrong in this.

Later when I realize self-care is important I had to put aside my beliefs and views and make the decision. At present, I don't regret the decision I made looking at where I am now.
Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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Last year, I had a girl in my form class who was regularly late or skipped school altogether. The class was very upset because she mostly got away with it without being ‘punished’ for her deliberate wrongdoing (the school leaders were very tolerant). This reminds me of Piaget’s Theory of mutuality where their sense of equality and justice was triggered. Together with my other FT, we took this opportunity as a dilemma experience for a discussion and reflection, followed by handing out blank cards for them to write an encouraging message to this girl. All who were present wrote something positive. In one way, while it was left it to them to make a personal moral choice, this reminds me of Kohlberg’s conventional theory stage 2 that some of them could have conformed because of peer pressure. The good that came out of it was the girl involved was heartened by the gesture and made efforts to improve her attendance.
Reply:
Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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One of it is when this student of mine started showing behavioral issues in sch after knowing that his parents is not on good terms and that they will be separating soon. He was close to his dad but because of some family dispute, he didn't get to contact his dad and he didn't like it that his mum is being hard on him. He started to act up in school. Being defiant and rude to his teachers, started sleeping in class and will purposely go around to beat his classmates if they didn't do what he wanted. The issue got worse and escalated to the yearhead where counsellors and aed lbs had to step in to assist.. He had to face punishment as consequence for his actions. My mentor stepped in to help him with anger management issue. We started off with a few sessions where my mentor taught him strategies on how he can learn to regulate himself if he is not feeling good instead of going around beating ppl to vent up his pent up anger..My mentor was firm during the session with him because my mentor wanted him to know that it is not okay to go around beating ppl up when you are unhappy and instead she rationalize with him about his actions. After a few session, we can see that he did try to apply the strategies in class whenever he felt angry, trying to his best to control his anger and change for the better. I remembered he telling us that he wanted to be there for his mum and dad during this tough time to overcome the family issues together as a family even though he knows the outcome is going to be something that he needs time to adjust to and he regretted his actions. We also created a system for him where we will do a 5 min check in with him everyday just to make sure that he is okay and to remind him that he should be in control of his own actions be it good or bad.

Linking back to today's lesson on how emotional factors can affect and how we as educator is often there to help and encourage these students in their prosocial behaviors is very important. These emotional factors really affects one moral choices and development with the mixed emotions that they feel having to face such situation. It helps them to experience the uncomfortable feelings that they get after knowing that they are the one causing the distress in this case with his discipline issues,we on the other hand have to make him realize that the distress that he has caused his mother to dealing with the current family situation and also now added on with his discipline issues in school . While having sessions with him, my mentor and me also plan activities to get him to experience the same emotion by getting him to put himself in his mother's shoes(Authoritative Environment and Role models of moral and prosocial behavior). Knowing that he is willing to face the consequences as a punishment for what he did, we stepped in as the authoritative figure to rationalize with him the reasons for the unacceptable behavior and make him change for the better. (Cognitive Development)
Reply: Thank you for sharing. Could you please further reflect and link to what we have learnt during our session yesterday?

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I heard this incident from a P3 Form Teacher.

A mother informed the Form Teacher that she suspected her daughter stole a set of highlighters from her classmate and sought FT's help to investigate.The mother remembered vividly that her daughter had begged her to buy a set of highlighters for her but the request was rejected. However , a week later , the mother incidentally discovered a set of highlighters in her daughter's school bag. The mother kept silent and did not question her daughter.

After thorough investigation , FT found out that the girl stole the set of highlighters from her classmate. P3 Year head and the FT did a proper follow up to close the case - the girl was required to write a reflection for her own actions and returned the highlighters to her classmate and apologised. We felt that the girl had learnt from the incident.

In my heart , I thought it was definitely a very challenging decision for the Mother to report to the FT about the incident. She could either choose to keep quiet about it and correct her daughter's mistake at home. By reporting to FT , the mother was fully aware that her daughter's conduct grade would definitely be impacted.

Linking to today's lesson on moral development , I reflected on the decision making process that the Mother must have gone through. I respected her thinking  and action about the ethical issues of right and wrong.The Mother did the right thing to correct her daughter's mistake and wanted her to learn to be more morally upright.
Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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I had an ASD student attached to me during my stint. My mentor already warned me that he dislikes people who needs to monitor and help him in his daily class although he needed the guidance and reminders to be able to manage himself. He tends to act impulsively, hit his classmates out of anger and had to be seated separately from his classmates in class and be alone during recess. Over time and constant reminders and getting to know me, at one juncture he was just able to manage himself well during class and recess that I only had to monitor him instead of having to constantly remind him to not interrupt or do his clean up properly. Although I was with him for a short while, I managed to see that change and he himself was a happier and less angry person before I left for my stint. He was even able to successfully be a buddy for a p1 student when initially he was very reluctant to as to him it was time taken away from his own personal time. However at the end of the buddy system, he gained a friend and someone to talk and play with. And his social interactions skills were so much better as well.

Linking it back to today's lessons, SEN kids when you explain and teach them give them reminders, eventually they will be able to get it. He used to be rude and loved to interrupt teachers and even called me names. But by reminding and guidance, he was able to stop and do the right thing. Even apologising and not having meltdowns when he knew he was at fault.

Reply: Thank you for the wonderful reflections and linking to what we have learnt today! 👍

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When I was halfway doing my degree, I decided to drop my psychology as my minor and opted for literature because I was not able to cope with the academic demands. I enjoyed doing psychology however, it was taking a toll on me emotionally and psychologically, which affected on my grades greatly. I was given mixed opinions to switch or to stay. My lecturer advised me to really consider my decision between interest and enjoyment.  I thought through all advises thoroughly and decided to make the switch eventually.

In relating to today’s lesson, the decision we make are fueled by thoughts and belief what is morally right or wrong. The opinions that I gathered from people around me have exposed me to different kinds of views and beliefs which then allowed me to decide on my decision. Even though the options laid out to me were not morally wrong, however, my career and future depend on the decision I make. I did not regret my choice because I managed to pull through and graduate well. 😊

Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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My positive Aha moment: A teacher's actions were consistent in demonstrating moral behavior for students. Simple and brief apology for interrupting discussion shows not only that the teacher also obeyed classroom rules, but teacher's own values and views of morality (efforts to be fair, responsible and democratic). We must first model ethical thinking, behavior and emotions in our interactions with students. In addition, during my group discussions , we questioned whether or not a technique will work the same for a main stream school and/or SPED school. This lead to developmentally appropriate practice, moral development with learners at different ages and what will help us respond to these differences.

At the elementary level is where we lay the foundation for students' moral growth, where students understand why rules are important for both classroom and the real world. For adolescence, we need to promote deep understanding, provide them the opportunities to practice (tolerance for others' opinions, listening politely and avoiding hurtful comments).

Model, explicitly teaching the skills with concrete examples are important for our SEN students.

Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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I had an upper secondary student in my stint school. During his lower secondary period, he was disruptive, had bad behaviour and had some family problems at home. He always gets into trouble in school and with his classmates. In Secondary 3, he was not doing well in school and the teacher and also the school committee thought that it would be a good idea for him to just move up to Secondary 4 instead of retaining. However, to everyone surprise, the student decided that its best for him to retain Sec 3. Everyone thought it might not be a good decision however as times passes by, it turns out to be the best decision for him, he got along well with his new classmates and was performing much better in his subjects. Going back to todays lesson, this moment showed that this student had develop post conventional morality in a sense that he is able to make a decision and knowing the consequences and expectations, he made a moral decision to retain Sec 3 in order to catch up with his studies. I was so surprise with his decision and also his perseverance in trying his best to do well. This moment was quite inspirational to me as well.

Reply: Great sharing and wonderful reflections! Thank you for sharing with us.

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As shared from Piaget’s Moral Development Theory, children are often judged based on the consequence of their actions. Many times, we (as authoratative figures, either parents or teachers), reprimand children and give consequences based on the effect of students’ behaviour without first finding out the reasons for such actions.

There have been several occasions in which I caught my brother sending text messages insulting or saying silly things to his friends on Whatsapp. My first reaction to it was anger as I did not think that it was nice/appropriate to do these things. Because of that, I scolded my brother about it, and warned him to use Whatsapp properly. However, this incident still continued happening, and it got to a point where his classmate’s mother wanted to talk to him. The fourth/fifth time that he was caught, instead of reprimanding my brother, I sat him down and asked him: Why did he do it? Does he think he’s funny when he sends such messages? Does his friends think it’s funny?

After hearing his reasonings, I realised that there are lingos/jokes in the younger generation that differed alot from my childhood. And he did it because he wanted to be “in” with his friends who usually joked about such matters in school, which was why he felt that we wronged him by scolding him about it. With a better understanding of his intentions for such actions, I explained to him that it is not nice to sending such messages to another party. If he feels that it is funny, he can go ahead and laugh with his friends, but as a person, we need to keep in mind to be kind towards the people around us, and insulting/being rude is not being kind. If he wants to make friends, or join in conversations, he can do so by initiating talks based on common interests.

It does not matter the age group of an individual, I believe that in contrast to Piaget’s Theory of Moral Development, we should all make mindful efforts to try and understand the perspective of the other party before carrying out any punishments (if). After that incident, I was glad to have been able to understand where my brother was coming from as it helped me in being able to better explain to him why he shouldn’t do such actions. Also, in my brother’s Point Of View, his actions was dependent on his wants and urge to fit in with his friends in school and was thus influenced by his social circle’s idea of a joke and what is funny. Moral Development is a lifelong process, and it is shaped by every individual’s different experiences. While I am aware that socialising can be a very heavy factor of influence growing up, I hope that the explanation of why I scolded him initially ask as a stepping stone for him to be able to make a clearer distinction between right and wrong.

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Once, I had a student who tends to take her peer's stationeries without asking for permission. She implied it was not a wrong act as long as she returned it to the person at the end of the day.

After sharing the rationale of seeking permission and constant reminders, she better understood  the purpose of asking for the things that she needs. The teacher began to introduced a reward system to promote good behaviour. Gradually her attitude and social skills improved.

Linking to today's lesson, I felt she went through Kohlberg’s theory of moral development. The change in her behaviour has improved her relationship with her peers too.

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A student of mine was triggered by another student who was calling him names in the school bus. My student got upset over this and hit the boy really hard. The next day, the bus attendant told me about this incident. My student denied hitting his peer. When I investigated further, I found out about the name calling. But my student still insisted that he did not hit his peer. I told my student that I was not going to force him to admit to his mistakes and he should think through all the events that followed. I had also told him that admitting to mistakes is a responsible thing to do. He thought through his actions and later approached me to tell me that he was guilty of what he did and was rather apologetic. He then moved on to apologize to his peer. I later processed with the boy and told him that it was rather brave of him to own up to his mistakes and did the right thing. Providing him the opportunity to make a right choice and not forcing it on him, allowed him to learn that he should own up to his mistakes without people telling him to. And should always do the right thing even when no one is looking.
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Moral choices
In my transit class, the special students do not share and play. (The students did not know how to solve the conflict and end up crying and complaining to me.) So they tend to take over places where they can play individually. I decided to teach them explicitly.(through role modelling and role play) how to share and play and also resolve conflict. It helped them to solve their conflict and share play together.
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My positive aha moment was a very funny situation. The decision I had to make was whether I wanted to get married to my now-wife. Both of us had toxic previous relationships and I had viewed the current relationship as kind of a rebound. We were both 28 at that point of time and were not looking to settle down yet. During one of our dates, my parents chanced upon us and questioned why was I with another women? (They did not know I had already left my previous relationship.) We were literally forced to sit down with my parents for an impromptu family dinner and were uncomfortably discussing marriage plans (which we tried to avoid as best as we could). Things got more awkward when it was found out that my partner's parents were actually very close friends with one of my kaypoh aunt. Soon after, I was formally meeting her family and discussing wedding dates against my choices. All these were happening on the spur of the moment. Needless to say, my life decisions were made by autopilot and we got married after dating for just 8 months. 5 happy years and 2 kids later, i still considered marrying my wife as the best decision i have ever made in my life (so far).

As for today's lesson, I believe my decision was based on a lot of emotional factors. As events progress by, people's thoughts and actions around me moved me along to make those continuous choices, although it might not be morally right at the point of time. Following Stage 3 of Kohlberg’s Theory of Moral Development, I think I wanted to satisfy those around me instead of first worrying about myself. In the end, it was the right decision after all.

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My student who is hypersensitive to sound and has difficulties in sitting down for long periods of time was given the opportunity to attend the NE show. His parents were reluctant to let him go for it as they were worried that he would have a meltdown due to having his senses overwhelmed during the NE show. But after some persuasion by me, they decided to let him attend. He really enjoyed the NE show and could remain seated throughout the whole time we were at the Padang. He even displayed some coping techniques that we taught him prior to the NE show (like covering his ears when it got too loud). He enjoyed the NE show so much that he kept requesting for videos on the National Day parade or the National Day theme song during leisure time in class in the following weeks after the NE show.
Linking to today's lesson, it was really amazing how my student was able to control himself and show socially appropriate behaviours during the NE show. He displayed moral, personal and psychosocial development from attending the NE show. He also could have learnt how to behave during the NE show through observing how his peers and teachers behaved during the NE show. (I feel like he has probably displayed Kohlberg's Theory of Moral Development, possibly level 2, stage 3?)
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My positive Aha moment: A few years ago , my friend and i booked a holiday trip to bangkok. However, a few days before setting off, the news reported that there were riots in BKK and the situation was quite chaotic and tense. we were torn between to go ahead or cancel the trip. We did not buy any travel insurance so cancelling the trip will incur huge losses so after discussing with my friend, we decided to go ahead as planned despite our parents as the MFA didn't issue any travel advisory yet. We just make sure that we register ourselves with MFA before we set off and to make sure we are 24/7 contactable with our loved ones. When we touched down and during our trip, we were lucky and did not even see a single riot and things were as peaceful as how we were like in singapore and it was indeed a right choice to go ahead.

linking back to today's lesson (on morality & domains),  despite going against my parents and knowing it is wrong to make them worry , (moral domains),  we choose to go ahead as there wasn't any travel advisory issued yet by MFA  so we felt it is still safe though our parents thought otherwise (personal domains) and the cost incurred will be too high if we cancel the trip (personal decision)

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He had a lot of discipline issue - smoking, skipping school, running away from home.

He valued his CCA a lot, always wants recognition from his social circle.

School ended up banding him from playing any competition, and eventually SLs gave him a infinite suspension where he had to find a new school.

He started to realize his mistake as schools did not want him. He made a written contract with the school and reflected on his actions and changed.

From today's lesson, I felt he went through Kohlberg's theory of Moral development. He cared more of what he wanted and also how his social circle would see him. He desperately wanted to fit in, both outside and in CCA. Removing him completely from it helped him realized what he really needs, and also improved on his morals.

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