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Motivation-Self kindness and grattitude.
It's easy to regret what may have been realized had you made different choices. It's important to remember that the rough moments shaped you, too. I have found that I can more easily use kindbess in the story I tell myself when I accept that everything I've expereiced was a recipe for the me of today. Sometimes, the hard stuff made me a better human than the good.

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Fear: Loss of control.
About 4 weeks ago I was diagnosed with a femural stress fracture, which basically means I ran until my bone cracked. This sounds insane, but it's a part of a larger story. What this injury translates to in my life, is crutches/walker for 6 weeks minimum. I am a DOER. I never take days off, never let my body just rest. In typical fashion, I never learn things the easy way, and now I am forced to rest. I hate every minute of it but it's temporary, as is everything in life. When all this is over, I won't stop being a doer, but I'll take a rest day here and there for sure. Oh, and i'll throw my crutches/walker in the road and drive over both several times.

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self expression & generosity of spirit
my essence is about sharing, expression, fearlessly wearing my heart on my sleeve & living my life according to the rules of my own spirituality; Be nice to people, and when people aren't nice to you, forgive them. It's pretty simple, but not easy. I visit a Rothko painiting in SF yearly (I even squeezed one in during 2020!) and it pulls so much emotion out of my guts. It leave me weepy and full of wonder. Just when you think the world is a pile of shit, you realize people make beautiful art that can make you FEEL, and to me, that is life affirming.

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Deepen my yoga practice and to stay curious.
Life long curiosity is what living means to me. I hope the future me still asks questions, leans into unknown (read:scary!) territory, and sees the world as an endless curvy, sometimes broken, but always worth showing up for path.

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Hot Spring swimming
There's a little place in Calistoga that feels like home in the home-est way possible. The pool is fed directly from the natural hot springs, and maintains a temperature of around 100 degrees. It feels like the best bath ever, like returning to mama's womb. There's no body shame, no cares, no intrusion of real life. And you know what else? Its even better with a glass of champagne in your hand. Can't recommend it enough.