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10 Ways to Help Your Child Succeed in MS

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10 Ways to Help Your Child Succeed in MS

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Parental support plays an important part in helping preteens and teens succeed in middle school. But as students grow more independent during these years, it can be hard for parents to know which situations call for involvement and which call for a more behind-the-scenes approach.

Here are 10 ways to keep your child on track for academic success in middle school.

1. Attend Back-to-School Night and Parent-Teacher Conferences

Preteens and teens do better in school when parents are involved in their academic lives. Attending back-to-school night at the start of the school year is a great way to get to know your child's teachers and their expectations. School administrators may discuss school-wide programs and policies, too.

Attending parent-teacher conferences is another way to stay informed. These may be held once or twice a year at progress reporting periods. Many middle schools, however, only set up parent-teacher conferences if parental involvement is needed to address issues like behavior problems, falling below grade-level expectations, or alternatively, benefiting from advanced class work.

If your child has special learning or behavioral needs, meetings can be scheduled with teachers and other school staff to consider setting up or revising individualized education plans (IEPs), 504 education plans, or gifted education plans.

Keep in mind that parents or guardians can request meetings with teachers, principals, school counselors, or other school staff any time during the school year.

2. Visit the School and Its Website

Knowing the physical layout of the school building and grounds can help you connect with your child when you talk about his or her school day. It's good to know the location of the main office, school nurse, cafeteria, gym, athletic fields, auditorium, and special classes.

On the school website, you can find information about:

the school calendar

contacting school staff

special events like dances and class trips

testing dates

sign-up information and schedules for sports, clubs, and other extracurricular activities

grades and homework assignments

Many teachers maintain their own websites that provide access to textbooks and other resources, and detail homework assignments, and test and quiz dates. Special resources for parents and students are also usually available on the district, school, or teacher websites.

3. Support Homework Expectations

During the middle school years, homework gets more intense and the time spent will probably be longer than during the elementary years, usually a total of 1 to 2 hours each school night.

An important way to help is to make sure your child has a quiet, well-lit, distraction-free place to study that's stocked with school supplies. Distraction-free means no phone, TV or websites other than homework-related resources. And be sure to check in from time to time to make sure that your child hasn't gotten distracted.

Sit down with your child regularly to talk about class loads and make sure they're balanced. It's also a good idea to set a specific start time for homework each night. Helping preteens and teens establish a homework schedule and consistent homework routine sends a message that academics are a priority.

Encourage your child to ask for help when it's needed. Most teachers are available for extra help before or after school, and also might be able to recommend other resources.

4. Send Your Child to School Ready to Learn

A nutritious breakfast fuels up middle schoolers and gets them ready for the day. In general, preteens and teens who eat breakfast have more energy and do better in school.

You can help boost your child's attention span, concentration, and memory by providing breakfast foods that are rich in whole grains, fiber, and protein, as well as low in added sugar. If your child is running late some mornings, send along fresh fruit, nuts, yogurt, or a peanut butter and banana sandwich. Many schools provide nutritious breakfast options before the first bell.

Preteens and teens also need the right amount of sleep to be alert and ready to learn all day. In general, preteens need about 10 to 12 hours of sleep each night and teens need about 8½ to 9½ hours.

Bedtime difficulties can arise at this age for a variety of reasons. Homework, sports, after-school activities, texting, TVs, computers, and video games, as well as hectic family schedules, can contribute to students not getting enough sleep. Also try to prevent kids from napping after school to ensure they can fall asleep at an appropriate time each night.

Lack of sleep can make it difficult for preteens and teens to pay attention in school. It's important to have a consistent bedtime routine, especially on school nights.

5. Instill Organization Skills

No one is born with great organizational skills - they have to be learned and practiced. Being organized is a key to success in middle school, where most students first encounter multiple teachers and classrooms on a daily basis, and where some students are participating in extracurricular or after-school activities for the first time. Because time management skills are usually not explicitly taught in school, preteens and teens can benefit from parents helping with organizing assignments and managing time.

Class information and assignments should be organized by subject in binders, notebooks, or folders. Teach your child how to use a calendar or personal planner to stay organized and schedule study times. Calendars or planners should include your child's non-academic commitments to help with time management.

It's also a good idea to make sure your preteen or teen knows how to make a daily to-do list to prioritize tasks and manage time. An after-school to-do list can be as simple as:

6. Teach Study Skills

Planning is a big part of helping your middle-schooler study for tests now that he or she is juggling work from multiple teachers.

Be sure you both know when tests are scheduled, and plan enough study time before each. When there's a lot to study, help determine roughly how much time it will take to study for each test, then make a study calendar so your child doesn't have to study for multiple tests all in one night.

Remind your child to take notes in class, organize them by subject, and review them at home each day.

Help your child review material and study with easy techniques like simple questioning, asking to provide the missing word, and creating practice tests. The more processes the brain uses to handle information - such as writing, reading, speaking, and listening - the more likely the information will be retained. Repeating words, re-reading passages aloud, re-writing notes, or visualizing or drawing information all help the brain retain data. Remind your child that it usually takes a number of tries to remember something correctly.

In math or science, doing practice problems is a great way to review for tests. Your child can ask the teacher for appropriate online practice resources.

And remember that getting a good night's sleep is smarter than cramming. Recent studies show that students who sacrifice sleep to study are more likely to struggle on tests the next day.

7. Know the Disciplinary and Bullying Policies

Schools usually cite disciplinary policies (sometimes called the student code of conduct) in student handbooks. The rules usually cover expectations, as well as consequences for not meeting the expectations, for things like student behavior, dress codes, use of electronic devices, and acceptable language.

The policies may include details about attendance, vandalism, cheating, fighting, and weapons. Many schools also have specific policies about bullying. It's helpful to know the school's definition of bullying, consequences for bullies, support for victims, and procedures for reporting bullying.

It's important for your preteen or teen to know what's expected at school and that you'll support the school's consequences when expectations aren't met. It's easiest for students when school expectations match the ones at home, so they see both environments as safe and caring places that work together as a team.

8. Get Involved

Volunteering at your child's middle school is a great way to show you're interested in his or her education.

Keep in mind, though, that while some middle school students like to see their parents at school or school events, others may feel embarrassed by their parents' presence. Follow your child's cues to determine how much interaction works for both of you, and whether your volunteering should stay behind the scenes. Make it clear that you aren't there to spy - you're just trying to help out the school community.

Parents can get involved by:

serving as a grade-level chairperson

organizing and/or working at fundraising activities and other special events, like bake sales, car washes, and book fairs

chaperoning field trips, dances, and proms

attending school board meetings

joining the school's parent-teacher group

working as a library assistant

mentoring or tutoring students

reading a story to the class

giving a talk for career day

attending school concerts, plays, and athletic events

Check the school or school district website to find volunteer opportunities that fit your schedule. Even giving a few hours during the school year can make an impression on your child.

9. Take Attendance Seriously

Middle schoolers should take a sick day if they have a fever, are nauseated, vomiting, or have diarrhea. Otherwise, it's important that they arrive at school on time every day, because having to catch up with class work, projects, tests, and homework can be stressful and interfere with learning.

Middle schoolers may have many reasons for not wanting to go to school - bullies, difficult assignments, low grades, social problems, or issues with classmates or teachers. Talk with your child - and then perhaps with an administrator or school counselor - to find out more about what's causing any anxiety.

Students also may be late for school due to changes in their body clocks. During adolescence, the body's circadian rhythm (an internal biological clock) is reset, telling a teen to fall asleep later at night and wake up later in the morning. Keeping your teen on a consistent daily sleep schedule can help avoid tiredness and tardiness.

For students who have a chronic health issue, educators will work with the families and may limit workloads or assignments so students can stay on track. If your child has a chronic health issue, a504 education plan can support learning at school. Talk to school administrators if you are interested in developing a 504 plan for your child.

10. Make Time to Talk About School

Staying connected with preteens and teens as they grow more independent can be a challenge for parents, but it's more important than ever. While activities at school, new interests, and expanding social circles can become more central to the lives of many middle school students, parents and guardians are still their anchors for providing love, guidance, and support.

Make efforts to talk with your child every day, so he or she knows that what goes on at school is important to you. When preteens and teens know their parents are interested in their academic lives, they'll take school seriously as well.

Because communication is a two-way street, the way you talk and listen to your child can influence how well he or she listens and responds. It's important to listen carefully, make eye contact, and avoid multitasking while you talk. Be sure to ask open-ended questions that go beyond "yes" or "no" answers.

Besides during family meals, good times to talk include car trips (though eye contact isn't needed here, of course), walking the dog, preparing meals, or standing in line at a store.

When preteens and teens know they can talk openly with their parents, the challenges of middle school can be a little easier to face.

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10 Ways to Help Your Child Succeed in Middle School

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Parental support plays an important part in helping preteens and teens succeed in middle school. But as students grow more independent during these years, it can be hard for parents to know which situations call for involvement and which call for a more behind-the-scenes approach.

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Ah, middle school. Though your child may barely be entering puberty and may still be a pre-teen, the transition to middle school is a big step on the road to maturity. A big, scary step. Regardless of what specific grade marks the beginning of junior high or middle school in your community, your child will be both excited and afraid. Researchers have found that students anticipating the move to middle school worry about three aspects of the change: logistical, social, and academic. Your child with learning or attention difficulties shares the same worries as her peers, and may be afraid the change will be even harder for her.

While you won't be able to calm your child's fears completely, with some advance planning and open discussions you can substantially ease her mind. The first step is understanding what may worry your child.

Logistical concerns

When researchers asked kids what aspect of moving to middle school most concerned them, the top answers related to how things at the new school worked (Akos, 2002). How would they find the right classroom? What happened if they were tardy? Where was the cafeteria? What about the bathrooms?

Middle school is a much more complex environment than grade school. The campus is larger, there are more students, and instead of one teacher and one classroom, your child will have a separate instructor, and classroom, for each subject or block of subjects (e.g., language arts/social studies or math/science). It's no wonder kids worry about finding their way in this new world.

For your student with learning or attention problems, understanding the rules and procedures of the new school may be even more important. The challenge of navigating multiple transitions between classes and organizing books and materials for every subject may be all she can handle in the first few weeks. Here are some strategies for helping your child make a smoother transition to middle school:

Explore the school's Web site with your child. Search for announcements, schedules, and events.

Accompany your child on campus tours and orientations offered to parents and incoming students. The better you understand the school layout and rules, the more you can help your child.

Get a map of the campus and take your child to explore. Pick a time after school in the spring or in the days just before school starts in the fall. Be sure to check in with the school office to get an OK for your explorations.

Include a couple of your child's friends on campus treks. They can boost each other's memory about where things are when school starts.

Take advantage of summer programs - academic or recreational - offered at the new school for incoming students. Your child will get the feel for the campus in a much more relaxed atmosphere.

Get a copy of your child's class schedule and mark the location of her locker and each classroom and bathroom on the school map. Tape both of these inside her binder. If your child has trouble reading maps, walk the route between classes with her - more than once, if necessary - and note landmarks that the student can use to navigate.

Find out the length of the passing period between classes. Time it out for your child. Demonstrate how far she can walk in that amount of time.

Get a copy of the student handbook. Review rules and requirements - especially the school's code of conduct, which describes consequences for violations of the most important rules. Ask the school staff questions about anything that's unclear.

Buy your child a lock for her locker several weeks before school starts to give her plenty of time to practice opening and closing it. (Note: Consider whether a combination or keyed lock is best for your child.)

Make sure your child has an easy-to-read wristwatch so she can quickly see if she needs to hurry to be on time to class. If she has a cell phone, make sure the time is set correctly and she is in the habit of checking it.

Social fears

Another area of worry for students moving to middle school is the social scene. Will I see anyone I know? Will it be hard to make friends? Will I have to eat lunch alone? Are the older kids bullies?

Your child is moving from the top of the elementary school heap to the bottom rung of the middle school social ladder. She may have heard that the older students tease or bully the younger ones. She knows for sure that she and her best friends are unlikely to be in every single class together, and, even worse, there may be classes where she doesn't know anyone at all on the first day. And if your child with learning or attention problems struggles to make friends anyway, then this all adds up to a potential social nightmare.

Remember that, in addition to changing schools,your child is entering adolescence, a stage when kids start to rely much more on peers and pull away from parents. This is a time when being part of a group is very important and being perceived as different can be devastating. It's not surprising that finding friends in the new school is a top priority.

The good news is that the more varied social environment also offers many opportunities to meet people. Being in multiple classes each day means your student is surrounded by more potential friends. The better news is that, once students are settled into middle school, they report that friendships and the social scene are among the best things about school (Akos, 2002: Forgan, 2000).

Some things that you can do to ease the social transition:

Encourage your child to join sports teams, clubs, or other extracurricular activities.

Ease any loneliness in the early weeks of school by helping your child arrange weekend social activities with neighborhood, church, or grade school friends.

Encourage your child to join group conversations. Discuss how to join in without interrupting, to add something relevant to conversation in progress, etc.

Talk about traits that make a good friend (such as being a good listener).

Talk about social skills. Discuss how words and actions can affect other people.

Practice skills needed for difficult social situations.

Remind your child to make eye contact when speaking or listening.

Academic concerns

Though most students worry more about the logistical and social aspects of middle school before they get there, once settled in, academic concerns rise to the surface. Will the classes be too difficult? Will there be too much homework? Are the teachers hard graders?

It's quite typical for students' academic performance to drop upon entering middle school. Along with everything else that's going on - rollercoaster emotions, physical changes, and social upheaval - your child is also coping with harder classes, more homework, and a whole new set of academic expectations. Middle school teachers don't form the close bonds with students that your child enjoyed in grade school. There is less small group and personalized instruction. Teachers expect students to take charge of assignments and projects with less day-to-day guidance.

For a student with learning or attention difficulties, these changes can come as quite a shock. Teachers may vary in their willingness to understand and accommodate your child's learning needs. Organization and time management demands rise to a new level. Though it can seem overwhelming, keep reminding your child that she can manage these changes successfully, though it will take time and practice.

Some tips to help ease her academic concerns:

If your child has an Individualized Education Program (IEP), meet with the middle school IEP team no later than the spring before your child enters the new school. Discuss the qualities of the "ideal" teacher for your child to help ensure the best placements.

Meet with teachers early in the school year. Give them a profile of your child's strengths and where she needs help.

Encourage teachers to continue using strategies that have worked for your child in the past, such as writing homework assignments on the board, or assigning your child a "homework buddy" she can contact if she forgets what her assignments are. If the school has a homework hotline, make sure your child knows how to use it.

Help your student with time management skills. Work together on a schedule for study time, break time, chores, etc.

Work out an organizational system with your student. Acknowledge and make allowances for her anxiety; at first, she may need to carry everything for all classes all the time in order to feel prepared.

Avoid overreacting to grades. Making sure your child gets a handle on how to meet the demands of the new school is the critical factor in the early weeks.

Stay connected to your child's school work. Try to teach your student to work more independently while supporting her enough to give her confidence.

Go to back-to-school night, open houses, parent-teacher conferences and other events where you can connect with your child's teachers.

Help your child be her own advocate. Encourage her to discuss problems and solutions with teachers on her own, but be ready to step in and help as needed.

The best way to help your child through this transition is to keep a positive attitude about middle school. You may remember how clueless, awkward, and self-conscious you felt at that age. Empathize with her if she feels the same way, and tell her it's normal for middle school students to experience those fears and emotions. Reassure her that she will become more comfortable and confident with time. Remind your child that the school and the teachers want her to be successful and that she has what it takes to make it all work.

Most students make the adjustment to the routines and demands of middle school within a couple months. If your child is still struggling as fall gives way to winter, then a meeting with her counselor may be in order. Together, you, your student and the counselor can pinpoint specific trouble spots and brainstorm ways to get things on track.

Try to give your tween plenty of information about how things will work in middle school, but be careful not to overload her. Be proactive in sharing information with her while also encouraging her to ask questions. To prepare for these conversations, you may want to read through the "Middle School Transition Tips for Parents" - and offer your child the "Middle School Transition Tips for Kids." The more she knows up front, the more comfortable she'll be on the first day, and beyond.

References

Akos, Patrick. "Student perceptions of the transition from elementary to middle school." Professional School Counseling, June 2002; 5(5):339-45

Forgan, James W. "Adolescents with and without LD make the transition to middle school." Journal of Learning Disabilities 2000; 33(1):33-43

Updated: December 9, 2019

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Smoothing your child's transition to middle school

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Ah, middle school. Though your child may barely be entering puberty and may still be a pre-teen, the transition to middle school is a big step on the road to maturity. A big, scary step. Regardless of what specific grade marks the beginning of junior high or middle school in your community, your child will be both excited and afraid.

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The District prohibits bullying, cyber-bullying, harassment, sexual harassment, discrimination and/or retaliation in any of its educational programs/activities, employment, and employment opportunities. For the District's full Notice of Non-Discrimination statement as well as methods to address questions and concerns please visit our Notice of Non-Discrimination and Web Accessibility page.

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Pinecrest Academy of Northern Nevada is a K-8 Tuition-Free Public Charter School...

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The District prohibits bullying, cyber-bullying, harassment, sexual harassment, discrimination and/or retaliation in any of its educational programs/activities, employment, and employment opportunities. For the District's full Notice of Non-Discrimination statement as well as methods to address questions and concerns please visit our Notice of Non-Discrimination and Web Accessibility page. For more information, visit the Civil Rights Compliance Department page.

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The District prohibits bullying, cyber-bullying, harassment, sexual harassment, discrimination and/or retaliation in any of its educational programs/activities, employment, and employment opportunities. For the District's full Notice of Non-Discrimination statement as well as methods to address questions and concerns please visit our Notice of Non-Discrimination and Web Accessibility page.

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