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 The Journey of an Engineering Student: Struggles, Growth, and Aspirations.

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 The Journey of an Engineering Student: Struggles, Growth, and Aspirations.

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WHO AM I?

I am Chrisna Mariel Bautista, a second-year Industrial Engineering student at Cebu Technological University, Tuburan. People mostly call me "nonchalant" because of my poker face or because I seem indifferent to what’s happening around me. But in reality, I’m always observing every little detail of what people do, and I enjoy analyzing their facial expressions.

I love food, well, most of the time! There are days when I’m more selective about what I eat. I also enjoy talking, but sometimes I prefer to keep to myself. I tend to get easily annoyed by loud people, yet I can be just as loud when I’m passionate or excited. Some might think I’m a bit weird, but for me, I’m just a normal girl with my own unique quirks.

Like most students, my goal is simple—to pass and graduate with the degree I’ve dreamed of. But the road to that goal isn't easy. Being an engineering student comes with its own set of struggles, endless assignments, tough exams, and sleepless nights. There are moments when I question whether I can keep up, but I push through, knowing that each challenge is part of my growth. We all have our strengths, problem-solving, persistence, and the ability to stay focused under pressure, but it’s also okay to struggle. It’s part of being human.

For me, life is about balance. We work hard for our dreams, but it’s also important to make time for ourselves, to breathe, and to remember why we started this journey in the first place. We all face challenges, but every day we get closer to our goals by staying resilient and true to ourselves. We’re not just aiming to finish college; we’re building the foundation for our future, where the lessons learned here will guide us toward greater success.

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My Fear of Failure and How I’m Moving Forward.

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My Fear of Failure and How I’m Moving Forward.

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My Biggest Fear

Fear is always there, sometimes quiet, sometimes overwhelming. For me, my biggest fear is not being able to finish this journey and letting my parents down.

I’m not the kind of student who’s always striving hard or aiming for perfection. Honestly, most days, I’m just trying to survive. Industrial Engineering isn’t an easy course, and I’ve already hit a big roadblock. I failed one of my major subjects, which made me an irregular student. That failure was a turning point for me, not just because of the academic setback, but because of the weight of what it meant.

It’s been over a year since I failed, and I still haven’t told my parents. Every time I think about it, I feel a mix of guilt, fear, and shame. I know how hard they work to support me and my education, and I’m scared that telling them will only hurt or disappoint them. That thought alone is enough to keep me quiet, even when the guilt feels like it’s eating me up inside.

But even with that fear, I keep moving forward, slowly, but I’m still here. I’m not the best student, and I know I’ve made mistakes, but I’ve learned that surviving is its own kind of strength. Failure doesn’t mean I’m done; it just means I have to work harder, even when it feels like everything is stacked against me.

Being irregular has made me see college differently. It’s not just about grades or timelines, it’s about resilience. I’ve learned to accept that my path might be a little messier than I planned, but that’s okay. What matters is that I’m still trying, and I’m not giving up.

One day, I know I’ll have to face my fear and tell my parents the truth. It won’t be easy, but I hope they’ll see that I’m not just trying to pass, I’m trying to grow, even though the setbacks. Until then, I’ll keep taking things one day at a time, hoping that I’ll get closer to that finish line.

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What Keeps Me Going

When I think about what keeps me moving forward despite all the struggles, the answer is simple, my sister. She’s the one who’s always there for me, supporting me not just emotionally but also financially. She’s the reason I can continue my studies, and knowing how much she sacrifices for me inspires me to keep going.

My sister works hard to cover my school expenses and allowance. I know it’s not easy for her, but she does it because she believes in me. Sometimes, it feels overwhelming because I know how much she’s giving up for me to have a chance at a better future. As students, we often talk about the challenges we face, difficult subjects, sleepless nights, and the pressure to succeed, but knowing someone is rooting for you, someone who’s giving so much for you, makes it even harder to let them down.

I’ll admit, I’ve had my fair share of failures. I even failed one of my major subjects, which made me an irregular student. At first, it felt like the end of the world. I was scared and ashamed, especially because I haven’t had the courage to tell my sister about it. But deep down, I know that her sacrifices mean I can’t just stop trying. She’s doing so much for me, and I owe it to her to keep pushing forward.

Like many students, I’ve struggled with self-doubt. There are days when I question if I’m good enough or if I’ll ever make it. But then I think of my sister, and it reminds me that this journey isn’t just about me, it’s about her too. She inspires me to keep going, even when it feels impossible.

One day, I hope to repay her for everything she’s done. I dream of graduating and making her proud of showing her that her sacrifices weren’t wasted. I want to tell her, “This is for you,” because she’s the reason I keep going.

To all the students out there, I know we all have someone or something that motivates us to keep going. Whether it’s our family, friends, or even our own dreams, hold on to that. It’s what helps us get through the hard times and reminds us why we started in the first place. For me, it’s my sister, and because of her, I’ll keep pushing forward, one step at a time.