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For a lot of my life, I was taught that I had to present myself as kind, passive, nurturing and pleasing to those surrounding me at all times. This rose symbolizes the soft, attractive and pleasing characteristics of femininity, or in other words hegemonic femininity. Especially in my Albanian household and culture this was crucial. Being violent or aggressive was unacceptable as well but I grew up forming my own complex versions of what I consider to be feminine. I identify with the gender assigned at birth, so I am a cisgender white female. I do have advantages as I am aware that I do not suffer the same oppression that those of different gender identities, age, and race do. I do believe that there is broad femininity that woman are set to attribute to, but intersectionality proves this is not true.

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In this picture, I'm on the far left side. It was taken in preschool. I was often made fun of for having short hair like a little boy. I remember wanting longer hair as it was more comfortable for me. However my family felt shorter hair is nicer for young girls/ woman, it was normal in my culture. I find this very contradicting since I was raised to express hegemonic femininity characteristics. As I grew older and started finding myself, I found I don't go by all of these characteristics my family wanted me to express. I tend to have both masculine and feminine traits in equilibrium. I'm not passive all the time and feel I also have dominant traits as well. I feel like I represent both of these qualities in this picture in my own way.

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In Albanian culture, it is looked down upon if a female doesn't grow up to get married and have children. The standard is set for this to be the gender norm. My parents are very heteronormative as so is the culture. I feel like that did affect my bias in a way since I grew up in this environment. Once I became a teenager I understood myself to be a dominant, outspoken, confident person. Sometimes even aggressive, as I took upon these traits from my dad. Again I find this contradicting because it goes against what my family and culture raised to teach me. I would wear baggy clothes sometimes, but I also would dress up feminine and be very expressive with my emotions. For me personally, a lot of the oppression was within my household and not really in society due to other factors. I couldn't imagine the maltreatment if I had a different sexuality or gender identity in both my household culture and in society.

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This is a picture I took at my job, at Victoria's Secret. I mainly work with mostly woman but there is also three men that work with us as well. I feel like there is a lot of woman employees mainly because the merchandise the company sells are "feminine" such as bras, panties, beauty, etc. But there are men working here and one of the managers is a male as well. I think the gender roles are slowly changing now in workplaces, as I've seen men working in retail stores like Ulta and Sephora too. I've helped male customers buy their own dresses. Working here for the past 3 years has helped me view intersectionality by working with different types of customers. I've gotten familiar with people of all gender identities, disabilites, race, class and I see the how they are oppressed in different areas. It's opened my eyes a lot in many ways and helped me see more into my gender identity as well.

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Growing up as a kid, my parents were working different schedules so it was difficult for them to watch after my sister and I at appropriate times. For a time period, my mom was working overnight while my dad worked the day shifts. She still had to maintain her role and cook meals for us and take care of the family at the same time. This goes against the constancy of social norms that define which gender role identities and sexualities are considered "normal". For single mothers however, they are more oppressed in the sense that they must maintain both roles and in society this isn't considered the "standard". My parents switched roles for a time period and I feel like it has affected my outlook on gender roles within my own identity. I feel like I have obtained some of both of their masculine and feminine traits on my own and I am still discovering more about my own identity as I get older.