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The whole Miss. Mrs. Ms. thing demystified.

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The whole Miss. Mrs. Ms. thing demystified.

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https://blog.oxforddictionaries.com/2011/11/02/what-are-mrs-and-ms-short-for/

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I was diagnosed with ADD a few years ago. I've always  seen everything as a challenge and I've found that outlook really helpful. 

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I was diagnosed with ADD a few years ago. I've always  seen everything as a challenge and I've found that outlook really helpful. 

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I don't think ADD should be used as an excuse. It's also a gift! If you can tame it.

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Misinformation about attention deficit disorder (ADHD or ADD) abounds among the patients at my busy practice. Many think medication alone will control their symptoms. Others believe that ADHD will not affect their lives once they have graduated from college. And almost none fully understand the way the ADHD brain works to produce the symptoms they experience. To help, I have developed the Intersection Model - a framework that can be used throughout an individual's life to make sense of behaviors, impulses, and emotions, and to create strategies to manage them.

ADHD and the Prefrontal Cortex

At the center of the intersection model is the prefrontal cortex (PFC). It is responsible for thinking, thought analysis, and regulating behavior. This includes mediating conflicting thoughts, making choices between right and wrong, and predicting the probable outcomes of actions or events. This vital region of the brain regulates short-term and long-term decision-making. In addition, the PFC helps to focus thoughts, enabling people to pay attention, learn, and concentrate on goals.

In my model, the PFC is the intersection through which attention, behavior, judgment, and emotional responses run (I call them cars or messages). A person with ADHD will likely react to whatever is in his focus at that moment - in other words, the faster car or stronger message. For people with ADHD, the PFC is unregulated; there are no traffic lights or stop signs controlling which message (car) gets through first. You could be the smartest, most motivated student ever, but if the teacher says "This species of dog..." and your thought switches to "I wonder what my dog is doing right now?" you get distracted.

ADHD and Fickle Focus

This unregulated intersection may explain why your attention wanders. Say you're in the kitchen cleaning up and find something that belongs upstairs. You take it toward the stairs, but get distracted by the unfolded laundry you see in the living room as you walk by. You may think, "I forgot to do that," and jump to folding laundry, forgetting that you were heading upstairs (not to mention cleaning up the kitchen).

People with ADHD get distracted because whatever is in their focus in the moment cuts off other, weaker messages. This can happen in mid-conversation, when a word triggers a thought that leads a person to another subject entirely.
[Self-Test: Could You Have ADHD?]
ADHD and Time Management

Judgment runs through the PFC, as well. When you say, "That'll take me five minutes to finish," that's a judgment call. "I'll be there in a half hour" is a judgment call, too. We can't see time or feel it. Understanding time, conceptualizing time, isn't as strong a message in the ADHD brain as the emotion behind a looming deadline or an unfinished task.

A person with ADHD might freak out about a deadline, saying, "Don't talk to me, I have all these things to do and no time to do them!" Or the person says to himself, "This task is going to take forever," and then uses that as a reason to procrastinate. If the person would just get started, the task would take maybe 10 minutes. In this case, the fastest car in the intersection is the emotion behind the judgment of how long it will take to meet the deadline.

ADHD and Emotional Regulation

Emotions run through the intersection of the PFC, bringing quick mood changes. "I won the lottery 10 minutes ago. Isn't that great? But now my sink is overflowing. OMG, why does this always happen to me?" Impulsive anger (or sadness, or excitement, or worry) seems to come from nowhere, when actually the emotion is a quick reaction to an event that just occurred (in this case, the sink debacle). That is what is dominating the person's focus at that moment.

In the ADHD brain, whichever emotion is in focus at the moment becomes the faster car. This is why those with ADHD express emotions more intensely than may be justified for a given situation. In females with ADHD, this emotionality is often misdiagnosed as a mood disorder.
[Free Download: Unraveling the Mysteries of Your ADHD Brain]
ADHD and Behavior/Impulsivity

Adults with ADHD self-medicate or spend too much money on unnecessary items, looking for quick gratification instead of bigger, more sustaining rewards. They may cling to a strategy even after it's proven ineffective, and rush through tasks, making errors in haste. This mindset leads to negative feedback from the world around them, interpersonal difficulties, and job or school troubles. Such inflexibility and impulsivity have a cumulative demoralizing and isolating effect.

In response, the individual with ADHD develops a mindset that focuses on the negatives, which exacerbates the situation. When we say, "Nothing is getting better, so it's pointless to try" or "They're not going to like me anyway, so why try to be friends?" it can lead us to stop trying because we perceive the situation as something that will only end in failure.

The faster car metaphor plays into being chronically late. If you are on your way out the door to go to work, and say, "I have 15 minutes left, I can just do this one thing," you make yourself late to work. If you didn't have ADHD, you would stop and think, "Oh, I have 15 minutes, but that's not enough time to do this thing, or I'll be late to work like last time." If you have ADHD, the stronger message isn't that you were late for work last time, but the desire to play a video game for a couple of minutes or phone a friend about going out on the weekend right now. And you are late for work - again. You keep doing the same things over and over because past experiences are being cut off by what is in your focus at the moment.

Why People with ADHD Feel So Anxious

As ADHD expert William Dodson, M.D., writes: "The vast majority of adults with an ADHD nervous system are not overtly hyperactive. They are hyperactive internally. Most people with unmedicated ADHD have four or five things going on in their minds at once."

The current thought regarding individuals with undiagnosed/untreated ADHD is that they tend to overcompensate for their difficulties with an anxiety-like response, such as racing thoughts, sleep difficulties, nervousness, and excessive worry. This overcompensation might look like this: You start heading to work and think, "Did the garage door actually close? I don't remember seeing it close. What if I kicked something, which tripped the sensor and the garage door is open? A thief is going to see that there aren't any cars in the garage and that no one is home. He's going to come in and take all my stuff. And when he leaves, he's going to let the cats out. I'm never going to see them again. I love them and I can't live without them. I have to go back and check. But I'll be late for work. What am I going to tell my boss?"

As I've said, people with ADHD often forget things that aren't in their focus, so these anxious thoughts are an attempt to keep these items (cars) in the intersection, so that the person doesn't forget about them. Holding many things in your mind creates a lot of tension, a traffic jam of sorts. Whenever too many things - thoughts or emotions - try to pass through the intersection at the same time, you're apt to feel anxiously overwhelmed and shut down. For instance, when trying to clean a cluttered room, with many items demanding your attention and none of them sticking out as more important than the other, you don't know what to do first, so you don't do anything.

It's frustrating when you go to the store for paper towels - and come back with everything but paper towels. Buying paper towels is the fastest car when you enter the store, but when you see the delicious looking pasta salad or the shiny red apples, they become the faster cars and overtake the paper towels - unless you've written down "buy paper towels" on a to-do list and read it.

ADHD and Regulating Emotion, Maintaining Motivation and Performance

Everybody likes to do things that are important and interesting, and that they're good at. We don't like things that are boring, frustrating, and not important. The problem is that those definitions change.

Let's say school is important to you. You spend all your time in the library studying, on your way to a 4.0. You have one more exam left, but you studied, so you should be fine. The test, and the motivation to do well, is the fastest car in the intersection. Right before you walk into the exam room, however, you get into a fight with your best friend - and you get a C on the exam. You studied and you tried your hardest, but the fight was the stronger message during the test.

"You could do this yesterday, so why can't you do it today?" The individual with ADHD hears this a lot during his lifetime.

ADHD, Mood Disorders, and Low Self-Esteem

In addition to having variable moods, individuals with ADHD tend to have difficulty staying happy or satisfied. If you keep reacting to everyday bad experiences (remember the overflowing sink?) and don't realize that those things are daily stressors - you've handled things like this before, you will have to handle things like this again - it will be hard to feel happy. In the ADHD brain, negative messages cut off positive messages. We don't think, "Well, I have my health" and pull that thought out during stressful times. Some with ADHD go from one negative experience to another, and are never satisfied with their performance.

Every person's ADHD affects him or her differently, but symptoms and behaviors can be explained through the Intersection Model. You can use this understanding of your ADHD brain to your advantage. You can find ways to erect a few stop signs or traffic lights, to make positive messages stronger and keep them in your focus longer, and improve your overall functioning and sense of self.

"Are You Criticizing Me, Again?"

The intersection model affects our relationship with partners. Here's an example from my life:

Every Tuesday night, I come home and ask my husband if the garbage is ready, because it gets collected on Wednesday morning. Every Tuesday night, he gets defensive: "I did this and that, and this...what do you expect?" For him, the stronger message is "I am being criticized again." Those with ADHD are more likely to hear criticism when their partner merely asks a question.

Think of how many negative messages a child with ADHD receives throughout his life: 20,000 more criticisms by sixth grade than his non-ADHD counterparts. My husband was diagnosed with ADHD in grade school, so he's always heard, "You can do this, why can't you do that?" "Sit down," "Be quiet." His nickname in high school was 'Slacker'.

I can change my tone of voice, jump up and down, remind him that we have this fight every single week, but it doesn't matter. He's still defensive. I ask him: "Do you think I'm criticizing you for not taking out the garbage?"

"Yeah."

"Nope! I'm just wondering if it's done, because, if not, I'll go do it myself."

"Oh...OK! How was your day?"

My husband and I have lived together for 13 years, and this happens once a week. Because if I don't ask that second question, we're not talking about the same thing. I'm wondering if the garbage is ready to be collected, and he thinks he is hearing the same childhood criticisms again; he thinks he is having something he didn't do pointed out to him again. In his brain, that is one of those fast cars likely to cut off any other car with a different interpretation of the situation.
[Free Webinar: What Neuroscience Reveals About the ADHD Brain]
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Everything You Never Knew About the ADHD Brain

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Imagine hundreds of cars approaching an intersection that has no traffic light or stop sign. This is what happens to the ADHD brain every day where the prefrontal cortex (the intersection) is unable to properly regulate your various thoughts and feelings (the various cars approaching the intersection).

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Code Switch: Hip-Hop, Mass Incarceration, And A Conspiracy Theory...

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Code Switch: Hip-Hop, Mass Incarceration, And A Conspiracy Theory...

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featuring Louder Than a Riot podcast

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About This Show

Show Info:

What's CODE SWITCH? It's the fearless conversations about race that you've been waiting for! Hosted by journalists of color, our podcast tackles the subject of race head-on. We explore how it impacts every part of society - from politics and pop culture to history, sports and everything in between. This podcast makes ALL OF US part of the conversation - because we're all part of the story.Read more "

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The VP candidate's biography and heritage allow people to project all kinds of ideas onto her, and to see what they want to see. But Kamala Harris's identity is a very important lens into not just her own politics, but also Black politics around crime and punishment more broadly.

Read more "

Episodes of This Show

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Listen to Code Switch episodes free, on demand. What's CODE SWITCH? It's the fearless conversations about race that you've been waiting for! Hosted by journalists of color, our podcast tackles the subject of race head-on. We explore how it impacts every part of society - from politics and pop culture to history, sports and everything in between.

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“Race isn’t about black people, necessarily.” It’s about the way whiteness works to disfigure and distort our democracy, and the ideals that animate our democracy.” 

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“Race isn’t about black people, necessarily.” It’s about the way whiteness works to disfigure and distort our democracy, and the ideals that animate our democracy.” 

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How Whiteness distorts our democracy. Ezra Klein show with Eddie Glaude Jr

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Listen to podcasts via our app. Get features like custom playlists, personalized recommendations & offline listening. | Stitcher

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The easiest way to listen to podcasts on your iPhone, iPad, Android, PC, smart speaker - and even in your car. For free. Bonus and ad-free content available with Stitcher Premium.

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Beyond Doomscrolling: Without minimizing the justifiable pain that 2020 has brought to so many people — we wanted to explore another way of seeing things. We talk with psychologist Steven Pinker about why it's so hard to see things that are going well in the world. 

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Beyond Doomscrolling: Without minimizing the justifiable pain that 2020 has brought to so many people — we wanted to explore another way of seeing things. We talk with psychologist Steven Pinker about why it's so hard to see things that are going well in the world. 

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Super important for all historians to keep in mind.

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About This Show

Show Info:

Shankar Vedantam uses science and storytelling to reveal the unconscious patterns that drive human behavior, shape our choices and direct our relationships.Read more "

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Beyond Doomscrolling

There's no question that 2020 has been a tough year. We're grappling with a global pandemic. A deep recession. Fresh reminders of racial injustice. But today - without minimizing the justifiable pain that 2020 has brought to so many people - we wanted to explore another way of seeing things. We talk with psychologist Steven Pinker about why it's so hard to see things that are going well in the world.

Read more "

Episodes of This Show

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Listen to Hidden Brain episodes free, on demand. Shankar Vedantam uses science and storytelling to reveal the unconscious patterns that drive human behavior, shape our choices and direct our relationships. The easiest way to listen to podcasts on your iPhone, iPad, Android, PC, smart speaker - and even in your car.

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How Your Body Language Shapes Who You Are - TED Talk.

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How Your Body Language Shapes Who You Are - TED Talk.

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Do this before every test (so teach your kids) or job interview!

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Your body language may shape who you are

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(NOTE: Some of the findings presented in this talk have been referenced in an ongoing debate among social scientists about robustness and reproducibility. Read “Corrections & Updates” below for more details as well as Amy Cuddy’s response.) Body language affects how others see us, but it may also change how we see ourselves. Social psychologist Amy Cuddy argues that “power posing” -- standing in a posture of confidence, even when we don’t feel confident -- can boost feelings of confidence, and might have an impact on our chances for success.

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wrote "man is born free, but he is everywhere in chains."
Ok. Sounds good. But...
Who is this man you speak of? Women aren't included? What about non-white, non western men?

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I've been a graduate student at U.C. Berkeley and an undergrad at San Francisco State. I've been to Laney and American University. I've been to U.C. Santa Barbara and Montgomery College. I've been to U.C. Extension and The Corcoran School of  Art. You might say I like school. 

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I've been a graduate student at U.C. Berkeley and an undergrad at San Francisco State. I've been to Laney and American University. I've been to U.C. Santa Barbara and Montgomery College. I've been to U.C. Extension and The Corcoran School of  Art. You might say I like school. 

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A tom cat dropped off Zipper in Tonda's back yard so of course I took him too

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A tom cat dropped off Zipper in Tonda's back yard so of course I took him too

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When not in school, I can usually be found in my backyard where I like to spend a lot of time with my animals

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When not in school, I can usually be found in my backyard where I like to spend a lot of time with my animals

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They often come to me as rescues from a friend's backyard where the universe appears to funnel them on a regular basis

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Mamacita was a feral who dropped her second litter in a friend's backyard. We catnapped em!

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Mamacita was a feral who dropped her second litter in a friend's backyard. We catnapped em!

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Eating grass makes their yolks bright orange and incredibly healthy to eat. My first 2 chickens were being given away on Nextdoor the neighborhood app.  They were called Dove and the other one. I renamed her Lovey. She started to crow like a rooster.

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I do get eggs from my girls but some days it's 4 and other days it might be none. 

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I do get eggs from my girls but some days it's 4 and other days it might be none. 

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Lake Anza is one of my favorite places. When the world seems way too complicated and even talking to my chickens won't help, I come here to have my faith in humanity restored.

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Lake Anza is one of my favorite places. When the world seems way too complicated and even talking to my chickens won't help, I come here to have my faith in humanity restored.

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There's a lot of interest about STEM these days but just reading with sustained concentration and comprehension is a basic building block. Here are a few TED talks that may offer a new perspective on the importance of reading.

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There's a lot of interest about STEM these days but just reading with sustained concentration and comprehension is a basic building block. Here are a few TED talks that may offer a new perspective on the importance of reading.

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Warning, this is an article with links to the talks. The article also has advertising.

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Once upon a time, there was only one way to experience a book: reading it. Nowadays, though, there are a million ways to engage with books outside of simple reading, from movie adaptations and podcasts to digital book clubs and bookish TED talks that will change the way you look at books. If you thought you were interested in books before, just wait until you hear a short and inspiring talk about your favorite subject, and your mind will be completely blown.

In 1984, the first TED (Technology,Entertainment, Design) Conference was held in February as a one-time event focused on tech and design in Silicon Valley, but by 1990, it became an annual event encompassing every scientific, cultural, and scholarly subject under the sun. In the 32 years since its conception, there have been thousands of TED talks on everything from feminism and the future to media and medicine given by experienced professionals, brilliant academics, and creative geniuses alike. Over the last three decades, the brightest minds and the biggest talents have taken the stage, both the physical one and the digital one, to share their ideas, passions, and hopes with millions of viewers eager to learn, and even more eager to change.

Among the best TED talks to date are the ones focusing on books. From the way books are designed to the power they have to open your mind, there's no bookish subject off limits to the authors, artists, designers, business people, and more who grace the TED stage.

Think you can handle it? Try watching one of these seven TED Talks, and get ready to have the way you think about books completely transformed.

In "The Politics of Fiction,"Elif Shafak, the most-read female author in Turkey, uses her unique literary voice to describe the ability reading and writing fiction gives us to transcend boundaries and understand the experiences of others. Moving and inspiring, this is the kind of talk that will make you truly believe in the power of books.

Children's book author Mac Barnett has penned fifteen stories for young readers, which is why he is especially qualified to talk about creativity, wonder, and imagination in "Why a Good Book Is a Secret Door." In his 2014 talk, the writer discusses bringing stories to life on the page, with both words and illustration, and the ability good books have to transport readers to a brand new world. Engaging and inspirational, add this talk will remind you of the many reasons children should be surrounded by books.

You may be into reading for the stories, but Harvard researchers Erez Lieberman Aiden and Jean-Baptiste Michel see a lot more than just words when they look at books. In their talk "What We Learned from 5 Million Books," Michel and Lieberman Aiden use Google Labs' Ngram Viewer, a database of over 5 million books throughout time, to reveal intriguing insights about history, culture, intelligence, and more. A fascinating conversation about art, technology, and humanity, you will never look at word counts the same again after this one.

Chip Kidd has spent over 30 years working for Alfred A. Knopf, designing books like Jurassic Park and All the Pretty Horses, and in his three decades of experience, Kidd has learned one thing: the necessity for humor. In "The Hilarious Art of Book Design," Kidd explains the thought and art to book cover design with wit, humor, and the kind of insight that only comes with his level of expertise. If you weren't judging books by their covers before, this talk might make you start.

Whether you're an avid reader or just a general consumer, you interact with typefaces on a daily basis, but how much thought do you give them? After watching the TED talk by Matthew Carter, the designer behind Veranda and Georgia and many others, you won't be able to stop yourself from examining every line and curve. An intriguing talk about the changing landscape of typeface - from photo to digital to desktop and beyond - "My Life in Typefaces" is a detailed account of a fascinating life that all book-lovers will find interesting.

Speaking of book design, software developer Mike Matas presents readers with a whole new experience in his talk, "A Next-Generation Digital Book." Although its five years old and the technology discussed is more commonly known now, Matas's talk reminds readers of the endless possibilities books hold, both in content and form.

Have you ever had a book that saved your life, gave you hope, or helped you through a hard time? Lisa Bu, a TED employee, can relate. In her funny and heartwarming talk, "How Books Can Open Your Mind," Bu discusses how books helped her throughout her life, including when she came to live in the United States, and how reading helped her expand her mind and understand her world better. A unique and personal talk, this is for book-lovers everywhere.
Images: Youtube (8)

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Once upon a time, there was only one way to experience a book: reading it. Nowadays, though, there are a million ways to engage with books outside of simple reading, from movie adaptations and podcasts to digital book clubs and bookish TED talks that...

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I listen to a lot of NPR and selected shorts is one of my favs. When was the last time someone read you a bedtime story?

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I listen to a lot of NPR and selected shorts is one of my favs. When was the last time someone read you a bedtime story?

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There's a new one every week so check back.

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Selected Shorts | Episodes, Schedule, Tour

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Selected Shorts is a weekly public radio show broadcast on over 150 stations to about 300,000 listeners. It is produced by Symphony Space and distributed by Public Radio International.

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THIS is why we need to teach shop to ALL kids.

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THIS is why we need to teach shop to ALL kids.

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Bill Gross - A Devotion to New Ideas by Stanford eCorner

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Bill Gross thrives on turning innovative ideas into pioneering companies. He serves as founder and CEO of Idealab, which started over 75 companies since 1996. In this stimulating lecture, he shares how Idealab continues to bring incredible ideas to market, and his personal insights on starting and running successful organizations. Gross also describes the work of eSolar, a spin-off company of Idealab that works to make solar energy cost-competitive in the global marketplace.

--------------------
Stanford eCorner content is produced by the Stanford Technology Ventures Program. At STVP, we empower aspiring entrepreneurs to become global citizens who create and scale responsible innovations.

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Great introduction for the non linguist to nativist language learning theory

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How to build an enduring, multi-billion dollar business - Sarah Tavel

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How to build an enduring, multi-billion dollar business - Sarah Tavel

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In my last post, I wrote that Uber built a multi-billion dollar business by using mobile to create a 10x better product than the incumbent (taxis), and did so at a lower price. The "and", as I wrote, is everything.

What's exciting to me is that Uber is not the first, nor will it be the last. Indeed, when you start to look for it, you realize "[10x product] and save people money" is the undercurrent running through dozens of breakout companies ranging from Airbnb to WhatsApp.

What's Amazon? Endless selection/convenience and the best price.

Remember Netflix's original marketing? More selection/convenience than your neighborhood Blockbuster, and no late fees.

Airbnb is all about unique accommodations and it'scheaper than a hotel.

Skype introduced presence/chat etc, and free international calls. WhatsApp did to international SMS what Skype did to international calls.

Alibaba, Craigslist, CreditKarma, eBay, Expedia, Poshmark, Priceline, Orbitz, Shutterfly, Transferwise, TurboTax, .... I could go on. (Oh, and if you're building one, I'd obviously love to hear from you: sarah at benchmark dot com.)

It shouldn't be a surprise that 10x + cheaper is such a killer combo for consumers. Who doesn't want something better, cheaper? It also happens to be a great catalyst for word of mouth. People love to talk about a new service they discovered that's better and saved them money - telling a friend how to save $20 can feel like actually giving the friend $20.

So how did they do it? Or perhaps more pointedly, how can you do it?

To me, there are two key ingredients:

1. It's about the [10x product]. Saving money is pouring gas on the fire.
As my former Pinterest colleague David Rubin pointed out to me, your service shouldn't lead with "saving money". You must create an offering that is so compelling, it stands by itself in the consumer's mind.

Case in point: when I first started to talk to people about my thesis, they'd push back. "Uber is just so much better than a taxi." "Amazon is all about convenience." "Airbnb is experiences you can't get at a hotel." Of course, they're right, but it's the "and" that accelerated the behavior change for most people. The 10x product is what kept those people as customers.

If you can get people to take your price advantage for granted, you've won. If on the other hand, your brand becomes more identified with saving money, then that's likely because your offering isn't sufficiently differentiated. Saving money is the feature. This puts incredible downward pressure on a company's unit economics. It's a lot harder to build an enduring business if you're forced to constantly optimize for price. Think: flash sale and deal sites.

The one exception I'd add here is that "free" is its own 10x product. If you can offer something for free that used to cost lots of people money (I'm looking at you Skype and Robinhood), growth will be the least of your worries.

2. Use technology to recast incumbent cost structures.
Okay, so you've got a 10x service. That's the easy part. Providing the 10x product cheaper in a sustainable way is where the rubber hits the road.

The key is to use technology to recast incumbent cost structures. This creates a structural cost advantage, and if you have economies of scale or network effects, an advantage that can endure as you grow.

Here are some of the strategies companies have used to do this:

E-Commerce

E-Commerce companies disrupted brick and mortar retailers by centralizing operations and benefiting from economies of scale.

Sharing economy

The "sharing" economy enables companies to unlock latent value in underutilized assets, and by doing so disrupts asset heavy approaches.

Peer to peer marketplaces

P2P marketplaces eliminate broker fees and middlemen, letting them pass savings to participants in their marketplace and reducing operation costs.

"Full stack" startups

More broadly, " full stack " startups use technology to fundamentally rethink services and disrupt the incumbents.

Emerging: AI, virtual reality, others?

Fast forward, and I've got to imagine that in addition to the existing techniques I mentioned, emerging technologies like AI and virtual reality will create a new class of 10x products that save consumers money.

For example, imagine not having to travel to the Serengeti because you can have an experience in virtual reality that's just like being on a safari, or getting a prescription almost immediately because you've been diagnosed by a neural network.

It's hard not to get excited for future startups capitalizing on these strategies.

What do you think? What emerging companies do you see doing this? I'd love to hear from you.

Follow me on Twitter @sarahtavel.

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How to build an enduring, multi-billion dollar business

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In my last post, I wrote that Uber built a multi-billion dollar business by using mobile to create a 10x better product than the incumbent (taxis), and did so at a lower price. The "and", as I wrote...

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Everyone should play these!!

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This is the tiny url to the reading room

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This is the tiny url to the reading room

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goo.gl/vbDvjL

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Just in case you know anyone who's working on their English, finishing High School, or wants to become a citizen

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Just in case you know anyone who's working on their English, finishing High School, or wants to become a citizen

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Most of the really helpful stuff on this website is free.

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USA Learns Now on Phones!

Exciting news! You asked for it, and it's here. With a generous grant from the Dollar General Literacy Foundation, USA Learns is now available to use on phones, tablets, and computers.
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Learn English free and study to become a U.S. citizen at USA Learns: USA Learns is a free website to help adults learn English online and prepare to become a U.S. citizen. Online courses include fun videos and activities that teach basic and intermediate ESL to adults around the world, plus the opportunity to prepare for the naturalization interview to become a U.S.

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They are incredibly easy to make and you get 3 for free.

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Really cool information about kids and families and how to make your life easier or just plain better if you have either of those things. 

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Really cool information about kids and families and how to make your life easier or just plain better if you have either of those things. 

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The latest research on children and families | Child and Family Blog

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We report on the best children and family research from the world's leading researchers and Institutes. A project by Cambridge and Princeton Universities.

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begun and held at the City of New-York, on Wednesday the fourth of March, one thousand seven hundred and eighty nine.
THE Conventions of a number of the States, having at the time of their adopting the Constitution, expressed a desire, in order to prevent misconstruction or abuse of its powers, that further declaratory and restrictive clauses should be added: And as extending the ground of public confidence in the Government, will best ensure the beneficent ends of its institution.

RESOLVED by the Senate and House of Representatives of the United States of America, in Congress assembled, two thirds of both Houses concurring, that the following Articles be proposed to the Legislatures of the several States, as amendments to the Constitution of the United States, all, or any of which Articles, when ratified by three fourths of the said Legislatures, to be valid to all intents and purposes, as part of the said Constitution; viz.

ARTICLES in addition to, and Amendment of the Constitution of the United States of America, proposed by Congress, and ratified by the Legislatures of the several States, pursuant to the fifth Article of the original Constitution.

Article the first. .... After the first enumeration required by the first Article of the Constitution, there shall be one Representative for every thirty thousand, until the number shall amount to one hundred, after which, the proportion shall be so regulated by Congress, that there shall be not less than one hundred Representatives, nor less than one Representative for every forty thousand persons, until the number of Representatives shall amount to two hundred, after which the proportion shall be so regulated by Congress, that there shall not be less than two hundred Representatives, nor more than one Representative for every fifty thousand persons.

Article the second. .... No law, varying the compensation for the services of the Senators and Representatives, shall take effect, until an election of Representatives shall have intervened. see Amendment XXVII

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begun and held at the City of New-York, on Wednesday the fourth of March, one thousand seven hundred and eighty nine.

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A recent social development research project found that not only do older siblings influence their younger siblings' early social development, but the opposite is also true: younger siblings influence their older siblings' development.

Traditional family services focus on parents and older brothers and sisters to support early childhood development. This study suggests that services should widen their attention to everyone in the family, including younger siblings.

What is empathy?

Empathy is the general capacity to share the feelings of others. 'Empathic concern' is defined as feelings of care and concern for others' well-being. Empathic concern has been found in infants as young as 8-10 months of age. Toddlers aged 14 to 20 months respond to others' distress with facial and vocal expressions. As their social development continues, they try to help and comfort the person in trouble.

The development of empathy is a central feature of early childhood development. It drives altruistic and prosocial behavior and is associated with less aggression, bullying and disruptive behavior.

Parents and siblings influence empathy

Most research on the topic has focused on how parents influence the social development of empathy in children. Discipline, emotion coaching and socialisation techniques have all been shown to affect the development of empathy. Moreover, warm parent-child relationships are associated with greater empathy.

Much less research has examined how older siblings influence the development of empathy in their younger brothers and sisters. Children who grow up with older brothers and sisters are likely to spend more time with them than with their parents. So older siblings would be expected to influence early childhood development, and research has demonstrated that they do so.

Relatively few researchers have examined how younger brothers and sisters may affect their older siblings' social development. Recent research has found that younger siblings can increase the likelihood of disruptive behavior in older siblings. On a more positive note, other research has shown that a warmer sibling relationship is linked to more empathy and prosocial behavior on the part of both the older and the younger sibling, at the same time protecting them both from adverse environmental factors.

Modern theories of early childhood development emphasise the significance of all relationships for a child's social development, as well as the reciprocal nature of every relationship. That includes relationships with parents and adults, siblings and peers, both older and younger. This perspective suggests that we shouldn't ignore the potential impact of younger brothers and sisters.

The social development research project in Canada

The recent study looked at 452 sibling pairs in Canada. The sample was diverse, including 42% immigrant families. Empathy in the two siblings was observed directly by exposing them to an unfamiliar adult exhibiting pain and sadness, and then coding their responses from a video record. The siblings were tested in this way twice - once when the younger sibling was 18 months old and again at 36 months old. The older siblings varied in age.

The research found that having a more empathic sibling - whether older or younger - was related to a greater increase in empathy between the two tests, 18 months apart.

The researchers then looked at factors that might shape the influences on early childhood development in different ways. They found two significant things.

The age gap. A bigger age gap increased the older sibling's influence on the younger sibling, but made no difference the other way around.

The gender of the siblings. Having an empathic younger brother had no influence on the development of empathy in an older sister.

How do younger siblings influence empathy in their older brothers or sisters?

Perhaps when younger siblings mimic the caring behavior of their older brother or sister, this reinforces the older sibling's behavior. Perhaps the experience of an empathic younger sibling is particularly rewarding and fulfilling for the older brother or sister.

The increased influence of an older sibling who is further away in age supports the idea that older siblings can support early childhood development through teaching and modelling of caring and prosocial behavior.

Jambon M, Madigan S, Plamondon A, Daniel E & Jenkins JM (2018), The development of empathic concern in siblings: a reciprocal influence model, Child Development

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Younger siblings who display more empathy help early childhood development

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A recent social development research project found that not only do older siblings influence their younger siblings' early social development, but the opposite is also true: younger siblings influence their older siblings' development. Traditional family services focus on parents and older brothers and sisters to support early childhood development.

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Life Coach Training: Academy for Coaching Excellence

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No prerequisite. Get the tools, skills, and community to bring resilience and ease to your life, especially during times of turbulence like we're seeing now. Prerequisite: Academy Foundational Training. Gain principles and practices to empower those around you to thrive, even amidst uncertain times.

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I've lived as a man & a woman -- here's what I learned | Paula Stone Williams | TEDxMileHigh

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Conflict Hotline - December '09  Pt. 1 of 6

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Would it be ok with you if life got easier? | Maria Nemeth | TEDxExchangeDistrict

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I once attended a back-to-school night where the school principal asked a big group of parents if anybody, given the chance, would return to middle school and take the chance to redo their lives. Not a single hand went up - and it's not just because of bad memories of those difficult years. Parents know that even today nobody has figured out exactly how to educate middle schoolers, who are changing developmentally in unique ways. I wrote a post about this issue last year, and here is a piece on a new approach to educating these students. It was written by Patrick Tolan, director of Youth-Nex at the Curry School of Education at the University of Virginia.
By Patrick Tolan

There is a troubling bias that most adults hold about adolescents, particularly in how we overlook the importance of the transition from elementary to middle school. It is a bias that goes beyond insensitivity and creates serious consequences - impeding education, styming potential, and decreasing productivity and civic engagement with the world around them. It also misdirects policy and allocation of limited resources.

This bias is our insistence upon seeing adolescence only as a time of great problems, of alienating and alienated personalities, and viewing younger adolescents in particular as trouble waiting to explode but for our careful watch and strong control. We overlook their capability and vigor for self-management and incorrectly view them as in emotional overdrive, unable to apply judgment, consider others, or see the future impact of what they do.

This bias is wrong. Forty plus years of scientific evidence has shown that most adolescents are very engaged in trying to be successful at school, home, and in their communities. Most are working to make the most of opportunities, to be responsible, and to begin exploring what it will mean to be an adult.

Research does show that the move to middle school, which occurs as children enter adolescence, is a treacherous time. On average there is a substantial drop in school engagement and achievement. Family relationships become more strained and kids report increased stress levels. The adolescent spikes in substance use, delinquency, and other problems first appear.

However, much of what we have learned shows that it is not adolescence per se that imposes these problems, but the disconnect between what we know about development and how we teach and treat youth at this age.

There is a challenge to face but it may be for the adults as much as it is for youth - a challenge to stop clinging to the bias that adolescents are problems waiting to happen and instead to engage youth for positive development.

What if we were to believe the accumulated research from the past 40 years and began to view this transition to middle school, with its attendant challenges, as not just a time of new fears for our children or the start of an awful time to just get through? What if we recognize it as a point of great opportunity for securing the important connections to family and school? What if we see our youth, as the research suggests, as capable, engaged, caring members of society and approach middle school as an opportunity to set the stage for a lifetime orientation of dedication to learning and growth?

Most importantly, can we finally recognize that entering our middle schools produces strain on our youth that taxes their motivation, connection, and relationships with adults? And having done so, can we instead focus on efforts that will promote these positive factors instead of accepting or bemoaning the status quo? We need to address the wholesale drop in performance and decrease in connection to adults and turn this time into one that builds on and secures the investment of our elementary school education.

This is the perfect time to shape adolescent idealism and their growing interest in the wider world into commitment to work, engaged citizenship, and care for others.

How do we change our views and more importantly change our actions? How do we make use of the valuable research and innovative work already underway? How do we channel that capability and become friendly helpers of adolescents shaping their own development?

Can we start to reconsider that this time - the move from elementary to middle school - needs the same sustained attention that we give to high school completion and early reading achievement?

This is the focus of a two-day conference ending Friday by the Youth-Nex Center, a University of Virginia Curry School of Education center focused on research, practices, and policies about positive youth development, or how youth grow into effective and productive adults.

Major organizations serving youth, educational training leaders, front-line practitioners, youth advocates, and scholars in the biology, psychology, and sociology of early adolescence are meeting to share ideas and forge meaningful actions that all work from this perspective of youth as capable citizens and middle schools and centers for positive youth development.

The positive youth development approach is a radical shift in perspective, with profound implications not only for middle school students but also for youth and families beyond these years. It holds that we should put our energies, planning, programming and spending toward youth capability support, meaningful engagement in their own learning and in their community. It affirms that we focus on helping youth be productive and succeed even in the face of many challenges.

Youth are the great potential for our society, one that our biases are blinding us to.

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middle school; school reform; university of virginia; curry school of education

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A new approach to the difficult middle school years

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Elementary and high school are hard enough to run but middle school is a problem unto itself. Even today exactly what to do with middle schoolers is a challenge. Read about a conference at the University of Virginia that is investigating a new approach to educating these young people.

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I took care of my folks in their last years. My dad worked on computer punch cards and nuclear subs in the 50s. He was 93 when he passed. He may have been a nuclear physicist when few people knew what that was, but he was also a ham.

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I took care of my folks in their last years. My dad worked on computer punch cards and nuclear subs in the 50s. He was 93 when he passed. He may have been a nuclear physicist when few people knew what that was, but he was also a ham.

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Really helpful with tools and tips like how to organize the IEP binder.

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Really helpful with tools and tips like how to organize the IEP binder.

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Understood.org

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Understood - For Learning and Thinking Differences

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Understood.org is the resource that helps the 70 million people with learning and thinking differences anticipate the challenges, barriers, or opportunities in life and confidently reach their potential.

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Heterodoxacademy.org

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We are a politically diverse group of more than 2,300 professors and graduate students who have come together to improve the quality of research and education in universities by increasing viewpoint diversity, mutual understanding, and constructive disagreement.

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We are a politically diverse group of more than 2,300 professors and graduate students who have come together to improve the quality of research and education in universities by increasing viewpoint diversity, mutual understanding, and constructive disagreement.

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The most important thing I've seen in decades

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The most important thing I've seen in decades

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It explains all that bizarre behaviour everyone else engages in 😉

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Jonathan Haidt: The moral roots of liberals and conservatives