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“ But inside you must always be Chinese you must be proud. You are different. You’re only shame is to have a shame.”

The reason I chose this quote is because I feel like I was able to relate to it. When I was young, there was a point in my life where my father was living in Mexico well, my family and I were living in the United States. I was old enough to understand why he couldn’t come to the United States and I hated the fact that he couldn’t. I hated the fact that We were Mexicans because if we weren’t Mexicans, I would have my dad with me while growing up. It wasn’t till I told him one day that I hated that we were Mexicans because if we weren’t meant that we could’ve been a family together. But when I told him that he told me “ Stop saying stupid shit like that. “he explained to me how being Mexican was A great honor and how many people wish to be like us and how being Mexican isn’t just your ethnicity but it’s also your culture and your traditions and who you really are. So going back to the quote it reminded me how when it is. Your only shame is to be ashamed. It reminded me of my dad.

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After everyone had gone, my mother said to me,

"You want to be the same as American girls on the outside."

She handed me an early gift. It was a miniskirt in beige

tweed. "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must

be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have

shame."

I chose this quote because it shows that being different is not a bad thing and that we shouldn’t be ashamed of what we are and where we come from.

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''My relatives

licked the ends of their chopsticks and reached across the

table, dipping them into the dozen or so plates of food.

Robert and his family waited patiently for platters to be

passed to them'' The reason I chose this quote was because when I read it, I tough to myself ow different the cultures between the two families were. And it reminded me how growing up around my Hispanic friends was, whenever id eat over at their places how out of place, I felt asking for some food or the language barrier that would always be a prevalent issue for me as well. This quote just resonated with me for that specific reason, and I was able to relate to it.

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"Amy, your

favorite," he said, offering me the tender fish cheek. I wanted

to disappear."

Even though I choose a funny image to relate to the quote but its a great reflection of it. Reason being is because she is putting aside her favorite thing just to get on the boy's good side and wanting to be more "American". This quote is also relatable to many at one point in time that wanted to make a good impression and a slip of you falls out from the shadows. Which culture should be something a person should be proud of and shared rather than being ashamed of it.

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"What terrible disappoint-ment

would he feel upon seeing not a roasted turkey and sweet

potatoes but Chinese food?"

Seeing this part of "Fish Cheeks" reminded me of how I was as a kid but to the opposite effect. I always wanted my cousins from Guatemala to come visit us here in the US for the holidays so they could experience what we celebrate here for Thanksgiving. But I always thought about what if they didn't like any of the food that we served for a typical American Thanksgiving meal? What if they made fun of us for being too American and not serving Guatemalan food. Possibly ask why we didn't serve Pepian or made tamales instead of turkey and potatoes.

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" What would Robert think of our shabby Chinese Christmas? What would he think of our noisy Chinese relatives who lacked

proper American manners?" This stood out to me because she was very embarrassed of her family's tradition and she had conformed to the American culture and standards for the sake of blending in and for the sake of the crush that she had on Robert. She was only young and I do not blame her, but I am glad that she came around to embrace her home, culture, ethnicity, heritage, and food.

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“You want me to be the American girls on the outside, but inside you must always be Chinese”

This quote stood out to me because it made me realize no matter how much you try to change to fit in with society deep down inside you’ll always belong to one cultural background, and that will never change.

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One quote that stood out to me came from Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan. The quote said, "You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to be different." This sentence really stood out to me because it highlights the story's main point. This reminds me of being multicultural and embracing it rather than being ashamed of it. I firmly believe that, despite our different traditions and identities, deep down we are all the same. Regardless of our differences in culture or race, we should feel honored to carry them with us. Everyone should love themselves and never feel ashamed of their culture. I think Amy's mother highlighted the importance of individualism; if we were all the same, not different, we would be boring. The fun part is being diverse and multicultural since you get the best of both worlds and should never feel ashamed for it.

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""But inside you must always be Chinese. You must

be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have

shame.""

during freshmen year high school i was dealing with an identity crisis along with watching the rapid growth in racism agents my race across the us

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The quote i picked was:

"After everyone had gone, my mother said to me,

"You want to be the same as American girls on the outside."

... "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must

be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have

shame."

This resonated with me a lot because when I was younger, I grew up in Mexico, I usually claimed to be American just because I was born here. This happened not because I was ashamed of being Mexican, but because my family referred to me as "The American one," which made me want to be just that. Overtime I learned I actually did not care about what my family thought. I am Mexican just like them, and I will embrace my culture.

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"You want to be the same as American girls on the outside. But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have

shame," (Fish Cheeks). This part spoke out to me because sometimes we'd see other families that like different things than us or celebrate cultures different than us and feel bad that we're different, but eventually we learn that they aren't ashamed of who they are so why should we?

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the quote i picked from fish cheeks was "The minister managed to muster up a quiet burp" the reason i picked this quote is because all throughout the entire story, we read on how embarrassed Amy is of her culture and wants to be more "American". However, when the minister burps it shows an appreciation for her culture that she may not have expected, I like how it shows connectivity between cultures and how people can always try to be more understanding.

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I finished reading "Fish Cheeks" by Amy Tan and from what caught me was the part where it says "At the end of the meal my father leaned back and  belched loudly, thanking my mother for her fine cooking. 'It's a polite Chinese custom to show you are satisfied,' explained my father to our astonished guests.". It shows the different way of culture or custom that Tan's family does to show their satisfaction on food while the other family were Flabbergasted from Tan's father reaction or belch. some families would have many different ways to show their gratitude towards something which will sometimes draw others attention from how odd their form of gratitude is compared that family.

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I read "Fish Cheeks" and what caught my eye was the part where it said "You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame." Indicating that one should not be scared to express your culture especially when someone has heard or tried any food from it because they could fall in love with it.

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“It wasnt until many years later - long after i had gotten over my crush on Robert-that i was able to fully appreciate her lesson and the true purpose behind our particular menu.”

I remember reading this story in class, and i thought it was sweet. As she grew up, she realized her food is what made her culture, and that she should be proud of her family and how she grew up. I also want to talk about how she had a crush on a white boy. As a woman of color, i also had crushes on the white boys i went to school with. But i feared they would not like me back because of my dark skin. Just like she was afraid of him not liking her because of the food she ate. Now that i am older, im more interested in other men of color. Specially black and Mexican, because that is what i am. Though white men aren’t completely off the table, i am good friends with some of them. But the maturity and growth of my life, along with bad experiences of them, my mind and views have shifted a bit. I dont think it’s necessarily a bad thing. But im glad i am aware of it.

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“You want to look like American girls on the outside. But on the inside, you must always be Chinese. You must be proud of being different. Your only shame is feeling ashamed.”

I chose this quote because I can relate to it, and it reminds me of my childhood. I started elementary school knowing only a few words and unable to read English. The elementary school I went to did not have a lot of Asian kids, so I struggled with identity. I wanted to be more American, and there was a time when I was ashamed to be Korean. I wanted to be good at English and do what other kids at school did. I even packed Lunchables and Caprisun to fit in with the other kids. I started to embrace my language, culture, and food in middle school because there was a large group of Asian kids. My parents told me that being Korean American is a good thing, and speaking two languages is an amazing talent. My parents and my peers helped me embrace my culture and be proud of who I am. I am no longer ashamed, I am proud.

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"When I found out that my parents had invited the minister's family over for Christmas Eve dinner, I cried. What

would Robert think of our shabby Chinese Christmas? What would he think of our noisy Chinese relatives who lacked

proper American manners? What terrible disappoint-ment would he feel upon seeing not a roasted turkey and sweet

potatoes but Chinese food?"

I found this quote interesting because to feel that embarrassed to be "different" is something I never understood. I always found the concept of "being normal" weird because of the saying, "Your weird is my normal, just as much as your normal is my weird." Just as any other race can find things that aren't normal to them, I can find things about them and say that isn't normal. I think all cultures need to celebrate our differences, because that's what makes us unique.

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I found this quote interesting because to feel that embarrassed to be "different" is something I never understood. I always found the concept of "being normal" weird because of the saying, "Your weird is my normal, just as much as your normal is my weird." Just as any other race can find things that aren't normal to them, I can find things about them and say that isn't normal. I think all cultures need to celebrate our differences, because that's what makes us unique.

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quote : " when I found out my parents invited the ministers family I cried. what would Robert think of our shady Chinese Christmas"

I chose this quote because it made me realize how shameful Amy actually is. Crying because the boy you love will think your culture is odd because they are different. I understand she probably didn't want to be embarrassed but that is no reason to be shameful of your own culture because being different is a gift.

-Albaro Flores

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"What would he think of our noisy Chinese relatives who lacked proper American manners? What terrible disappointment would he feel upon seeing not a roasted turkey and sweet potatoes but Chinese food?"

I choose to quote this section of the reading because of how foreign the experience Amy has to my gatherings in my life. As a kid, gatherings were flooded with family and friends of the family and growing up in Boyle Heights the people who attended were mainly Mexican American. I hadn't worried about "behaving properly" or conform to a new environment until I entered high school when a friend invited me to a family gathering. So when reading scenarios similar to this, the amount of worry that comes from hosting someone who is not accustom to your way or your families way is odd. In addition, it makes me happy for not having to worry and growing up to know that there is no "proper" way of being. Being polite does not mean not having an opinion, and there has to be some grounds to allow new people to find their place in the space.

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"Fish Cheeks" by Amy Tan

Quote: “You want to be the same as American girls on the outside… But inside you must always be Chinese.”

I choose this quotation because it highlights the need of maintaining connections to your culture despite social pressure to blend in. In the narrative, Amy feels self-conscious about her culture, particularly in front of people she wishes to impress. Her mother, however, tells her that she should never forget who she is on the inside, even if she makes an effort to appear or behave "American" on the outside. This relates to the concept of assimilation, when individuals may feel that in order to fit in, they must conceal their cultural identity. As someone with Mexican ancestry, I can identify with moments when I feel different, but this phrase demonstrates that being unique is something to be proud of, rather than something to be embarrassed about.

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"You want to look like American girls on the outside. But on the inside, you must always be Chinese. You must be proud of being different. Your only shame is feeling ashamed."

This quote stood out to me because it highlights an important idea: being different is something to be proud of, not something to hide. A lot of the time, people feel pressure to fit in, which can make them change how they look, act, or even think just to be accepted. That pressure can lead to feeling embarrassed about who we truly are. But instead of being ashamed of our differences, we should recognize them as part of what makes us unique. The real mistake isn’t being different—it’s losing yourself by trying to meet other people’s expectations. While we might adjust how we present ourselves on the outside, our identity and who we are inside will always remain a part of us.

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"You want to look like American girls on the outside. But on the inside, you must always be Chinese. You must be proud of being different. Your only shame is feeling ashamed."

This quote particularly caught my attention because of the message it conveys: "Being different is a source of pride." We often try to belong to a certain group, which leads us to change who we are, how we dress, or how we act, and we feel ashamed of not being like everyone else. But the only thing we should be ashamed of is changing to please others, hiding our essence under other people's standards. We can change on the outside, but we will never erase who we are on the inside.

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"But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame it to have shame."

This quote matters because it shows a turning point in how the narrator sees her identity. Her mother is teaching her to stop feeling embarrassed and to take pride in her culture. It shifts the message from shame to self-acceptance.

For the Asian American community, this connects to a common experience. Many grow up balancing two cultures and may feel pressure to fit into mainstream American society. This can lead to hiding traditions, language, or family customs. This could also apply to anyone and everyone who is a part of 2 different cultures in which they have to decide which one might make them feel better.

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“Amy, your favorite," he said, offering me the tender fish cheek. I wanted to disappear.”

I chose this section because I feel like it is a good representation to what the story is about. This dish was a sort of representation of her and where she comes from and her culture. She has never felt embarrassed or a shame of it before until it was present by people who she felt wouldn’t understand her because it’s something “different”. It’s one of her favorite things to eat but in the moment she wanted to disappear and hide that part of herself when in reality she had nothing to be ashamed about. I feel like this feeling happens often especially when you are younger because you feel like being “different” means not being “normal” but it is that uniqueness that should be highlighted and expressed because that is what created diversity and cultural pride.

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“I wanted to disappear. How could my parents bring this shame on me?”

I chose this quote because it really shows how food and culture can feel embarrassing when you’re trying to fit in. The meal itself wasn’t the problem, it was how Amy felt being different in front of others. It connects to how a lot of Asian American families express identity through food, even when younger generations feel caught between cultures. I think it highlights that struggle between wanting to belong and still being tied to your roots.

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"It wasn't until many years later—long after I had gotten over my crush on Robert—that I was able to fully appreciate her lesson and the true purpose behind our particular menu."

I chose this quote because it shows how maturity changes our perspective on our culture. When we were younger, the want to fit in American culture make people feel embarrassed by their family's traditions. but as the narrator grows up, she realizes that those traditions are an expression of love and identity from her mother.

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"for Christmas I prayed for this blond-haired

boy, Robert, and a slim new American nose." I chose this quote because it really showed me just how the author felt because for someone younge things they usually wish for is toys or a new phone, but she wished for a boy who didnt look like her and was blonde and white and a brand new nose that would get rid of the one that had her ethnicities characteristics. It really spoke to me just how much she wished to be born different.

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"You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame". I believe this quote can resonate with anyone who feels like being different is a problem, something they should hide so others don't judge them. However, it should be the opposite; it's something we should proudly show, because it's okay to be different. Everyone has their own cultures, and we should appreciate each one as beautiful, remembering our identity because it shapes who we are. If we feel ashamed of it, we lose an important part of ourselves.

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"You want to be the same as American girls on the outside." She handed me an early gift. It was a miniskirt in beige tweed. "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame." I chose this quote because the elementary and middle school I attended did not have many Latinos in my school. It made me feel like outcast because it look like that I didn't belong.

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"You want to be the same as American girls on the outside. But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud that you are different. Your only shame is to have shame."

The reason this quote stuck with me is because I feel like I come from two different worlds from my family, but over time I’ve learned to accept that and be proud of who I am. The message shows how kids born here can struggle with their cultural identity and trying to fit in with others their age. It also explains that people shouldn’t feel embarrassed for being different, but instead should take pride in where they come from. The mom reminds her daughter that it’s okay to be American and be herself, but she shouldn’t forget her roots or who she is deep down.

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“For Christmas Eve that year, she had chosen all my favorite foods.”

I really liked this quote because it shows that even though the narrator felt embarrassed by her culture, her mom was actually showing love in her own way. The mother made all her favorite foods to make her happy, even if it didn’t seem “American.” It made me realize that sometimes we don’t understand our parents’ actions until later, and that culture is something to be proud of, not ashamed of.

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"After everyone had gone, my mother said to me,

"You want to be the same as American girls on the outside."

She handed me an early gift. It was a miniskirt in beige

tweed. "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must

be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have

shame."

This quote makes me think about my own experience as a Mexican American. I feel like I can relate to the idea of wanting to fit in on the outside, like dressing or acting a certain way, so I’m not seen as different. There are times when I try to blend in with everyone else, especially in places where I don’t see a lot of people who look like me or share my background.

At the same time, the part about staying true to who you are on the inside really stands out to me. It reminds me that even if I try to fit into American culture, I still carry my Mexican roots with me.

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Stop trying to fit in.
Accept the fact that you are different.

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"But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame." I chose this quote because it captures the central tension of the story—the conflict between wanting to fit in and holding onto one's identity. At fourteen, Amy feels ashamed of her Chinese heritage because she sees it as something that sets her apart from her American peers. Her mother responds not by dismissing those feelings, but by acknowledging them while encouraging Amy to reframe how she sees herself. The quote reminds us that difference is not something to be hidden but something to be owned and that the greatest loss is letting outside judgment convince you to abandon who you are.

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The quote I have choosen, ' "Amy, your

favorite," he said, offering me the tender fish cheek. I wanted to disappear. ' It demonstrates Amy's conflict, the fish cheek standing for her culture and family heritage. She feels ashamed rather than proud, especially in Robert's presence. This scene encapsulates the story's main idea relates to the Asian American experience of being torn between two identities and family morals.

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I decided to choose this quote from Amy Tan's "Fish Cheeks":

"You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame."

This stood out to me because it shows the main message of the story. Amy feels embarrassed about her culture during the dinner, especially because her crush is there. But her mom reminds her that she shouldn’t feel embarrassed or ashamed of her culture. Instead, she should embrace it and be proud of her differences.

"Your only shame is to have shame" is like a reminder that the only real problem is the shame she puts on herself. I would use this as a constant reminder to ask myself why I feel ashamed and to learn to love myself for my differences. That’s what makes you unique. Do you really want to be just like everyone else? Everyone has their own culture and language, and that’s something we should be proud of, not hide or be ashamed of.

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A picture of people from different cultural backgrounds laughing or enjoying a meal together. 

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I would like to quote this passage from Amy Tan’s Fish Cheeks: “And even though I didn't agree with her then, I knew that she understood how much I had suffered during the evening's dinner. It wasn't until many years later—long after I had gotten over my crush on Robert—that I was able to fully appreciate her lesson and the true purpose behind our particular menu. For Christmas Eve that year, she had chosen all my favorite foods.”

This passage illustrates that, at the time, Amy was unable to embrace her own cultural heritage; consequently, she felt ashamed of the cultural differences between herself and Robert’s family. Her mother perceived her shame, embarrassment, and distress; yet, rather than attempting to alter her own cultural practices to appease either the guests or her child, she remained steadfast—while simultaneously offering understanding. As Amy matured and gained the perspective that only the passage of time can provide, she was able to revisit and re-interpret this past event. Years later, she finally came to comprehend the profound significance of her mother’s steadfast adherence to Chinese culture, as well as the depth of her love. This passage vividly portrays her journey of growth—from shame to understanding—and reveals the true essence of maternal love and cultural identity.

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I decided to choose the quote, “But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame” from Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan because it shows the main message of the story. Amy feels embarrassed about her culture during the dinner, especially in front of Robert. But her mom reminds her that being different is not something to be ashamed of. Instead, she should be proud of who she is and where she comes from. This stood out to me because I feel like I struggle a lot with wanting to fit in, even if it means hiding my identity or culture. It also shows how Amy is caught between two cultures. She wants to be accepted as American, but her family and traditions are still a big part of her identity. Her mom understands this and she tries to teach her that she doesn't have to choose one over the other. I think it is important because it reminds us that our background is something to appreciate and not hide it.

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"At the end of the meal my father leaned back and belched loudly, thanking my mother for her fine cooking. 'It's a polite Chinese custom to show you are satisfied,' explained my father to our astonished guests." The reason why I chose this quote from Amy Tan's short story, "Fish Cheeks" is because it illustrates the difference in customs that some cultures have. In the lines that I chose, it quite literally reveals that it is a Chinese custom to show pleasure after eating a meal. While the father does so in a strange manner, it being described as him "belching", it shows just how different some cultures are and how some things that are viewed as unpleasant at the dining table for some people, can actually have a completely different meaning for others.

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The reading I chose to focus on was Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan. In the story, it is about Amy Tan's childhood, and when her parents decided to invite her crush's family over for Christmas Eve. The part that stood out to me the most while reading was when her mother told her,

"But inside, you must always be Chinese. You must be proud to be different. Your only shame is to have shame.”In a way, I can relate to Amy. When I was younger, there was also a time when I was ashamed of who I was. I tried separating myself from my family because I couldn't seem to fit in; I myself felt different and couldn't seem to accept that. But, as her mother says, you should be proud to be different because what is special about being the same?

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I chose the quote "You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame." This quote shows the story of Amy and her cultural pride. She shows that she is ashamed of her culture because she wants to fit into the American culture. Her mother explains that she should never be ashamed for who she was since that is the real her. This connects to asian American experiences because many feel pressure to convert to a different culture but they must fight that pressure and hold on to their original roots. The quote tells us how being different is something to be proud of and to embrace the difference within ourselves.

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"You want to be the same as American girls on the outside."…. "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must

be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame."

I chose this quote because it is relatable to anyone who has come from another country to America. This shows how children who are born here struggle with their cultural background and their struggle to want to fit in with kids there age . The mom tells her daughter how it is okay to be American and be who she is but without forgetting her roots and who she is in the inside which is Chinese. People should have pride in where they come from not shame or embarrassment for being different . I relate to this as well because I come from two different worlds but have learned to love where I come from and to accept identities are complex .

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The quote I chose is "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud that you are different." I chose this quote because my heritage and culture has always been shamed on being latino and people have been shamed for who they are as a person. I think that being true to yourself and not hiding your culture and ethincity is the most important thing in the world because it's the one trait about you that should always be a positive thing.

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"You want to be the same American girls on the outside." She handed me an early gift. It was a miniskirt in beige tweed. "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame."

I chose this quote because it demonstrates the importance of self love. That feeling of isolation and feeling out of place doesn't come from anywhere else but our minds. It's crucial to learn how to overcome feelings like that in order to build a life that you are happy with. Even though your ethnicity and culture is different compared to everyone else's around you.

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From "Fish Cheeks" by Amy Tan. "For Christmas Eve that year, she had chosen all my favorite foods" I do not think her mother changed any foods for Christmas but instead she realized those foods were her favorite all along. She felt shame from her family and her heritage in the past, but even though her mother understood those feelings, the mother also teaches her its importance. She did not agree with the lesson her mother tried to teach her when she was younger but over time she realized the importance of identity in culture and food.

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“But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame.”I choose this quote because it shows the importance of embracing your cultural identity, even when you feel embarrassed or different. Amy Tan’s mother teaches her that the real problem isn’t being different, but feeling ashamed of who she is. This reminds me that cultural traditions and family customs are something to celebrate, not hide, even if they seem unusual to others. To remember to never feel ashamed of where you come from.

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"You want to be the same as American girls on the outside." She handed me an early gift. It was a miniskirt in beige tweed. "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have Shame."

( Fish Cheek, Amy Tan)

In this section of the short essay, Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan, she brings a great focus on embracing and being proud of your cultural identity as opposed to feeling the pressure to assimilate, as the main character did. In it, “you want to be the same as American girls on the outside”, the mother acknowledged her daughter's desire for American normalcy but reminded her that being different is something to take pride in because shame doesn't come from one's culture, but from feeling ashamed. I chose this quote because it reflects a universal experience across many cultures, not only Asian Americans, when it comes to food. At times, foods with unfamiliar looks or smells attract unwanted attention, and one gravitates toward eating what others do to blend in. I can, in a way, relate to this because, as a Mexican American, many Mexican dishes are popular to eat as well as widely accepted, whereas eating more traditional or regional meals is more often than not judged, which can sometimes create consciousness in people about their cultural identity.

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The reading I chose was Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan. The specific quote I found grabbed my attention from this reading was when the authors mother told her "You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame" (Tan).

The reason I found this quote interesting was because it highlights that one must cherish their own culture. There are definitely settings where your culture may be seen as different by others but regardless it should be something you embrace. This quote I feel explained this very well by indicating that its true that not sharing the same culture as someone may differentiate you from them in some way but in a way that you should be proud of. Someone's culture characterizes them and their upbringing and so it is nothing to be shameful of. When the mother says that the author's only shame is to have shame, she means to say that the real shameful thing is losing that proudness for your own culture. Being different is a good thing and one should never forget or regret their roots in order to blend in.

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The quote that stood out to me was, " that I was able to fully appreciate her lesson and the true purpose behind our menu." (Fish Cheeks)

I selected this quote because it demonstrates growth and self - acceptance. What she once thought was "embarrassing" Chinese dishes were actual symbols of love, heritage, and pride. It wasn't just simply food it was the mom showing that their culture is beautiful. As she grew older, she learned to accept her culture and the message her mom was trying to deliver. This stood out to me as it represents the beauty of culture whether it'd be through dishes, traditions, or religions every culture is uniquely beautiful and should be embraced and appreciated. It's a simple yet expressive quote that describes the acceptance of her cultural background.

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"When I found out that my parents had invited the minister's family over for Christmas Eve dinner, I cried. What would Robert think of our shabby Chinese Christmas? What would he think of our noisy Chinese relatives who lacked proper American manners?" — Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan

I chose this quote because it perfectly illustrates the heavy toll of cognitive imperialism on a young person's identity. The narrator isn't just embarrassed, she is seeking the "approval" of the dominant culture, viewing her own family's traditions through a lens that labels them as "shabby" or outside the "normal" American standard. This connects deeply to what we discussed earlier this semester regarding Post-Traumatic Slave Syndrome and the way internalized shame is forced upon marginalized communities, whether Asian, Latinx, or others. By asking what "proper American manners" are, the text forces us to realize that these standards are social constructs designed by those in power. It’s a heartbreaking example of how we are conditioned to feel shame for our roots when we should be demanding mutual respect and appreciation for the beauty in our differences.

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I chose “Fish Cheeks” by Amy Tan. When Amy said, “ My relatives licked the ends of their chopsticks and reached across the table, dipping them into the dozen or so plates of food”, I thought about how different my family eats too! We don’t usually eat dinner all together because we all come home at different times so we eat when we can but, it got to a point where eating with other families, like my boyfriends for example, became so awkward and uncomfortable. After a couple visits I got used to eating with them and it is now a wonderful experience.

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"You want to be the same as American girls on the outside." She handed me an early gift. It was a miniskirt in beige tweed. "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame."

I chose this quote because it highlights a very important idea from this unit. The idea that, despite being from a different ethnicity and having different traditions from the ideal American household, you are still just as important and special, no matter where you are from. The seperation is not a true seperation, it was one built from shame that comes internally. Being proud of who you are and where you are from is crucial to building a life that is happy and satisfying in a world that belongs to all of us equally.

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The quote I used was ''You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame''. Being proud of yourself, That uniqueness is where creativity, new ideas, and real identity come from being you. When you’re proud of who you are, you’re less controlled by fear of being under judgment. And that gives you more freedom to live honestly, choose what fits you, and connect with people who actually get you.You think in your own way. You’re not just following the crowd, you have traits others might not have and that's what's important.

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"What terrible disappoint-ment

would he feel upon seeing not a roasted turkey and sweet

potatoes but Chinese food?

On Christmas Eve I saw that my mother had outdone

herself in creating a strange menu. " - Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan.

I chose this section because it reminded me of the first time I got to eat dinner with my Cambodian friend's family. Now up until this point, as a Mexican, I was really only familiar with carne asadas with my family, but my friend was hyping up the traditional dishes his parents were preparing and I've always been someone who loves to try things but at the same time I didn't know what to expect. Sure enough, when the food came out, I was in absolute awe at how good everything was and after that I practically begged my friend to make sure to invite me more often.

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The Asian American Community Jesus Perez 

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The Asian American Community Jesus Perez 

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Identity, Struggle, and Resilience

“Asian American identity has been shaped by exclusion, resistance, and the ongoing struggle for belonging in the United States.”

I chose this quote because it shows that being Asian American is not just about cultural traditions or heritage, but also about facing challenges and overcoming barriers in society. It highlights how history, including discrimination and exclusion, has played a major role in shaping the identity of this community. At the same time, the quote emphasizes resilience, showing how Asian Americans have continued to fight for acceptance, equality, and representation. This connects to broader themes of identity and belonging that many groups experience, making it easier to understand the importance of unity and activism. When I think about this idea, I picture images of Asian American communities coming together in cultural celebrations or standing in protests, which reflect both pride and strength. Overall, this quote stood out to me because it captures both the struggles and the perseverance that define the Asian American experience, reminding us why it is important to recognize and respect diverse histories and voices.

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"But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame."

I chose this quote because it shows the importance of being proud of your culture. Even though we might feel embarrassed of our culture, it is important to remember there are countless others like us. This quote helps remind me that being someone I'm not won't make us feel less lonely, and only accepting our culture as part of us can.

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“It wasn't until many years later - long after I had gotten over my crush on Robert - that I was able to fully appreciate her lesson and the true purpose behind our particular menu. For Christmas Eve that year, she had chosen all my favorite foods.”

I chose this quote because on first read I thought it was interesting how she was describing all this food, she was making it sound as unappetizing as she could. Her thinking this already seemed to be an overreaction, something she was saying to try and conform to American cultural identities in her own mind. So, with this revealed at the end that her favorite foods had been what was served, it shows how truly silly her reaction to dinner was that day. This quote shows how insecure she was in her own cultural identity that her own favorite foods were something to be ashamed of, which ties to the mother’s lesson that day. She is who she has, her favorite foods are something that she should be excited to show other people, not a source of shame. It relates to what we have been learning about in class about culture in food; furthermore, this made me think of how we learned that people are ashamed to bring their cultural food to school.

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"But inside you must always be Chinese. You must

be proud you are different.“

I choose this quote since I believe we all have may experienced a time where we didn’t want to embrace our culture or found it embarrassing. But later on we realized how beautiful it is and how unique different cultures are.

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The quote I picked was, "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must

be proud that you are different. Your only shame is to have shame." I chose this quote because it is important to embrace who you are and to never compare yourself to others. Everyone is unique, and that is your identity.

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The quote I picked was "You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame." This is a very powerful quote to me. I believe majority of people think being different is bad, but it should not be seen that way. Being different is good and unique. We should all be proud of our differences.

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"You want to be the same as American girl outside".

I think this quote holds a lot of weight especially coming from different cultures. A lot of times us as people feel we can not express who we are and where we come from and we feel we must act like the way America tells you to act. When we go to school, work, or just everyday life people can feel their culture holds no significant weight. We see that a lot especially the way things are looking at right now in the world where cultures are not being acknowledged only if you fit the "American" way that is being celebrated nothing else.

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“You must be proud to be different .Your only shame is to have a shame.”

From Fish Cheeks

I picked this quote as it really shows the guilt many non-American kids feel by seemingly just existing. The feeling of exclusion morphs into hate towards their heritage, the uniqueness they bring. Like how Amy felt sick seeing her family act their ways with guests invited, kids feel like they need to put down their customs in order to appease American manners. This feeling could be shared by others like them. The quote is telling Amy to not let this shame win. Shame for your true self has no place when you can share your experiences with others. I never really felt distant from my customs or past relations but I know of many others who did.

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I chose this picture because i feel like it represents to finally be proud of your identity and letting it shine. 

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"Fish Cheek" by Amy Tan (Francia Cornejo)

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"Fish Cheek" by Amy Tan (Francia Cornejo)

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“‘But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame.’”

Explanation: I chose this quote because it shows how important it is to accept and be proud of your culture. The main character feels embarrassed about her Chinese traditions, especially around people from a different background. Her mother reminds her that being different is not something to hide, but something to value and embrace. This teaches us to respect and appreciate different cultures instead of feeling ashamed of them.

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"But inside you must always be Chinese you must"

"Be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame"

I chose this quote because it holds a significnt message to the story and to my own life as well and can be also said for many others. I think its true that you should be proud of being "different" and of your culture. Nobody should have to change themselves to fit in or to feel better but instead rather be themselves and be accepted. I believe this quote is a big step forward to cultural appreciation for many and towards the story.

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Quote “ you must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame”

I chose this quote because it’s very easy to feel embarrassed of where you come from because you might not feel secured, but in the end it’s important to feel confident because there’s so many other people with you and your culture. It’s important to never let your culture die befits something so beautiful and unique.

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"The Asian American community is made up of many different cultures, languages, and histories, yet they share common experiences of immigration and identity in the United States."

I chose this quote because it shows the Asian American community is very diverse but also connected through shared experiences. It helped me understand that even through people come from different backgrounds, they can still relate to each other through similar struggles.

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raditional clothing from different Asian countries

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" You must be proud you are different. Your shame is to have shame"

This quote stood out to me because it talks about accepting yourself and you identity and culture. In society you see it a lot where people are insecure and ashamed of their own culture they act the same as everyone else to avoid being judged or hated on.

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"What would he think of our noisy Chinese relatives who lacked proper American manners"

I chose this quote because growing up, I had a long of siblings and they had kids in which we were a big family. Whenever we would go out, it would be so chaotic for us, and I would think to myself at how embarrassing it is. I then realized that I shouldn't care what others think, we are enjoying ourselves and even if we are sometimes loud, we are happy and enjoying our time together. It's okay to not be "well-mannered" all the time, it's fun to embrace the chaos and have good laughs.

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The quote that stuck out to me was from Fish Cheeks - Amy Tan "You want to be the same as American girls on the outside." This quote stood out to me because the mom knows her daughter wants to be culturally American even though she is a Chinese girl. I have felt this way personally trying to fit in with people, but I recently came to be proud of who I am and do not need to assimilate to the people around me and its okay to be different.

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"For Christmas Eve that year, she had chosen

all my favorite foods."

This short story really stood out to me, especially the part where Amy's mother made her favorite foods. Amy was nervous about what her crush from another culture would think. The lesson from her mom about feeling shame stuck with me, because there’s nothing wrong with being part of your own culture. Amy learned that she will always be Chinese, and that’s something to be proud of. If others see her culture as "weird" or "different," it probably just means they haven’t experienced it, or it’s not for them.

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“What would Robert think of our shabby Chinese Christmas?”

This quote stood out to me because it shows how Amy Tan feels insecure about her culture and family traditions. She is worried that Robert will judge her because her Christmas is different from what is considered “American.” This moment shows how people can feel pressure to fit in and hide their cultural identity. I think this is important because many people experience similar feelings when they are around others who are different from them. The story shows that being different is not something to be ashamed of, but something to accept and understand.

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“You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame.”

I chose this quote because it shows an important lesson about identity and self acceptance. In Fish Cheeks, Amy Tan feels embarrassed about her culture when she is around Robert, but her mother reminds her that being different is something to be proud of, not ashamed of. This connects to real life because many people try to fit in and hide parts of who they are, especially their culture or background. I relate to this because sometimes people feel pressure to act a certain way to be accepted. This quote teaches that embracing who you are is more important than trying to please others. It also shows how family can help us understand and appreciate our identity.

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“You want to be the same as American girl outside.”

I did choose this quote because it shows how people can really feel pressure to act more “American” in public, even if their culture is at home and are different. This even connects to the Asian American experience, but I also relate to it as a Mexican American girl. Sometimes there is just pressure to fit in with American culture at school or even in public, while trying to still holding traditions, language, and even values at home. It can feel like living between two identities. This quote is as important because it highlights the challenge of balancing cultural pride even with the desire to belong.

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The quote I have picked is "You must be proud you are different". This was a quote from Amy Tan and it spoke to me. It spoke to me because growing up I was always different than everyone else because I was Mexican. That never stopped me from being me though because seeing all the successful Mexicans around me and seeing them on the Tv as well told me and taught me that I should be Proud of where I come from. I am proud I am different I would not choose to be anything else.

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“You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame” (Amy Tan). I picked this quote because there have been times when I felt ashamed to be Mexican because I don't speak Spanish and at times I felt I have been discriminated by my own people/culture. but as I got older I just learned not to care anymore and not let it bother me because being different should be something to be proud of and not be embarrassed about.

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"It wasn't until many years later – long after

I had gotten over my crush on Robert – that I was able to

fully appreciate her lesson and the true purpose behind our

particular menu." - Amy Tan. This quote demonstrates how one is so focused on themselves at the moment that everything else can be easy to ignore. It also shows how one matures; it can seem like the end of the world at the moment but as time passes by you realize how it wasn't that serious.

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Quote: "but inside you are Chinese. You must be proud to be different."

I like this quote because this is how I learned to understand how we must be proud of where we come from. In elementary we're taught of American inventions, and it wasn't until sophomore year of high school did I learn about Mexican inventions. It wasn't until my chicano/Ethnic studies class did I learn that Mexicans helped create colored television, chocolate, and earthquake-resistant technology. I was completely mined blown to see that my culture has had a huge impact on the world. And it led me to discover how many different cultures, no matter how different, have impacted the world for the better.

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In the reading "Fish Cheeks" by Amy Tan, I chose the quote "You want to be the same as American girls on the outside." She handed me an early gift. It was a miniskirt in beige tweed. "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame."

I chose this quote because it was something my mom would always tell me as I was growing up. Although I didn't feel uncomfortable growing up and embracing my heritage, I did at times feel uneasy or out of place witnessing cultural dances or celebrations that me and my family went to go see. I'm not so sure why, but my mom noticed and told me that although I might not feel the connection, my culture would always be within me and I would one day be proud of it. She told me to not have any shame in it too because witnessing my culture in person was like looking into the past and seeing how despite its hardship, my people and its traditions still live on and that I too would fight to keep it alive, no matter how small that fight might be. She was right. Now in the present, I have no shame in who I am and where I come from, and I'm proud of it.

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"You must be proud you are diffrent. Your only shame is to have shame" I choose this sentence because the mother is telling her daughter how she wants to be somebody else on the outside while in the inside, you will always cary where you come from and you you should be prud to be. This is telling me how i should always embrace who I am and to not pretend to be somethig/someone im not just to fit in.

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What would Robert think of our shabby Chinese Christmas? What would he think of our noisy Chinese relatives who lacked proper American manners?

I chose this quote because in a way I related to the quote when inviting friends over that don’t have the same culture as me. There are many reasons because of our food, language, and manners. Yet overtime I have learned that that's ny culture and people should respect it and honor that I’m sharing that important part of my life.

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"And even though I didn't agree with her then, I knew that she understood how much I had suffered during the evening's dinner. It wasn't until many years later – long after I had gotten over my crush on Robert – that I was able to fully appreciate her lesson and the true purpose behind our particular menu"

- Amy Tan

This quote was an amazing conclusion to the story Fish Cheeks. I chose this quote because it shows that sometimes it takes a lifetime to come to a conclusion you accept. It also shows that you cannot deny the different parts of you whether it be your family, culture, or core values.

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"What would Robert think of our shabby Chinese Christmas? What would he think of our noisy Chinese relatives who lacked proper American manners? What terrible disappointment would he feel upon seeing not a roasted turkey and sweet potatoes but Chinese food?"

The reason why I chose this quote was because I was able relate to this same situation. When I had brought over my girlfriend at the time, I was scared that it would be hard for my parents (who spoke mainly Spanish) and my girlfriend (who couldn't speak Spanish) to communicate together. However, I was able to help translate for them and all went well.

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" And even though I didn't agree with her then, I knew that she understood how much I had suffered during the evenings dinner. " I chose this quote because I relate to the event of later understanding something that got you mad or upset in the past. Sometimes the emotion is what gets in the way of someone embracing where they're from and the traditions that follow that.

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“You want to be the same as American girls on the outside. She handed me an early gift. It was a miniskirt in beige tweed. But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame.”

The reason why I chose this quote is because it caught my eye cause how the world is now. “You must be proud you are different” is something that a lot of immigrant parents do tell their children because not being white means you're weird or not worth it. And there is no shame on who you are and you need to be proud on who you are and even in this day and age

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The quote I chose from the reading, “Fish Cheeks” by Amy Tan is “My relatives licked the ends of their chopsticks and reached across the table, dipping them into the dozen or so plates of food.” This quote stood out to me because although I am not  Chinese, I can still relate to this quote. It reminds me of where I’m from because we usually don’t use utensils, we usually use our hands or we use tortillas as utensils. I remember feeling different when I went to my friend's party. She was white and she was ale to use all the utensils properly, but I wasn’t.

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Quote- At the end of the meal my father leaned back and

belched loudly, thanking my mother for her fine cooking.

"It's a polite Chinese custom to show you are satisfied,"

explained my father to our astonished guests.

I think this quote means that different cultures have different ideas of what is polite. While burping may seem rude to us, the father explains that in his culture it is a way of showing appreciation for the meal.

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Quote: “You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame.”

I chose this quote because it shows the main message of the story about identity and self-acceptance. In the story, Amy feels embarrassed about her culture and wants to fit in with American people, especially in front of Robert. She feels ashamed of her family’s traditions, like the food and the way they act, because she thinks it makes her look different. However, her mom teaches her that being different is not something to hide, but something to be proud of. This stood out to me because a lot of people feel pressure to fit in and may hide parts of who they are. It shows that instead of being embarrassed, people should accept and appreciate their culture and identity.

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Quote: "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different."

Explanation: I chose this quote because it shows how important it is to stay connected to your culture, even when you are surrounded by a different one. The idea is that being different is not something to be ashamed of, but something to be proud of. This connects to the idea of identity because people sometimes feel pressure to fit in.

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Reading:

Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan.

Citation:

And even though I didn't agree with her then, I knew that she understood how much I had suffered during the evening's dinner (Tan 2).

Explanation:

I chose this part because I feel like it reflects Amys relationship with her mother and the shame she harbors over her identity. She is mortified over the short story as she is mortified by her parents' behavior. Her mother's actions aren't dismissive of her feelings or behavior. Rather, there is a quiet empathy towards her. Her mother is telling her through subtle actions rather than outright stating for her to be proud of her heritage and culture. Her mom understands that eventually she will come to understand this lesson, so rather than condemn or scold her, she uses the situation as a lesson for her.

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In the poem Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan the quote or citation that stood out to me the most was “You want to be the same as American girls on the outside. But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame.” I chose this quote because it shows the main idea of the story about identity. From what I go in the poem Amy feels embarrassed of her culture and just wants to fit in with American people, especially in front of Robert. But her mom tells her she shouldn’t be ashamed of who she is. This stood out to me because a lot of people feel pressure to fit in and hide parts of themselves, especially if they come from a different background. It shows that being different isn’t something to be embarrassed about, it’s actually something to be proud of. It also connects to cultural identity and how people can feel stuck between two cultures, which I have never experienced but have seen glimpses of in other people.

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In the story Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan, a quote that stood out to me was, "What would Robert think of our shabby Chinese Christmas? What would he think of our noisy Chinese relatives who lacked proper American manners?". I chose this quote because it shows how the author wanted to fit in with her neighbors. In some way the children of immigrants feel like they are different, especially if they grow up around people that don't share the same culture. They start to have feelings of shame because they want to be able to fit in. I'm sure many people can relate to what the author was feeling.

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After everyone had gone, my mother said to me,

"You want to be the same as American girls on the outside."

She handed me an early gift. It was a miniskirt in beige

tweed. "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must

be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have

shame."

I picked this quote from the short story Fish Cheeks is the idea that you are different, which shouldn't make you feel any form of shame. As being different makes not only makes you who you are, but means pride in whatever culture you are apart.

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In Amy Tan's "Fish Cheeks" the quote I chose was, "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame." This quote stood out to me because I believe shame for one's culture stems from accepting the negative stereotypes society has for people of color and it turns into internalized racism. The only person thats being affected by this shame in the story is Amy just because her crush is coming over. She shouldn't have to be having these negative thoughts in mind when she's so young, so I'm glad her mom is able to tell her to not be ashamed of herself or her family.

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In “Fish Cheeks” by Amy Tan, one quote that stood out to me is: “But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame.” I chose this quote because it shows the main message of the story about accepting and being proud of your cultural identity. During the dinner, Amy feels embarrassed by her family and their traditions in front of Robert, but her mother reminds her that her background is something to value, not hide. This moment shows how people can feel pressure to fit in, especially when they are young, but later realize that their differences matter. The image I picture that reflects my thoughts is a family sitting together around a table full of traditional Chinese food, representing culture, love, and identity. I also liked my classmate’s post because it explained Amy’s embarrassment in a relatable way and showed how many people go through similar feelings when they feel different, which helped me better understand the importance of accepting yourself.

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In this passage, the narrator describes liking a white boy and begins to feel insecure about her own appearance and culture. She compares herself to him and starts wishing she looked more “American,” showing how she has internalized certain beauty standards. This creates an inner conflict, making her feel embarrassed about her family and traditions.

This stood out to me because I can relate. As a Mexican-American woman with a biracial partner, I sometimes worry about not meeting each other’s family expectations. Even though our backgrounds are different, it’s comforting to know others have experienced similar feelings.

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"My relatives licked the ends of their chopsticks and reached across the table, dipping them into the dozen or so plates of food. Robert and his family waited patiently for platters to be passed to them." This simple description is almost a perfect encapsulation of the cultural dichotomies present in something as simple as eating a meal. How odd it must look to other people when I decide to eat rice and fish with my hands or use spoon and fork as opposed to a knife? Although I've never felt shame for my cultural background, I've certainly witnessed this clash of cultural ideals in person myself!

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A quote I chose from Fish cheeks is "Then my father poked his chopsticks just below

the fish eye and plucked out the soft meat. "Amy, your favorite," he said, offering me the tender fish cheek. I wanted to disappear."

The reason I chose the quote because we have discussed the topic before of people being ashamed of their culture when its shown around other people and here in the quote it shows that she is embarrassed because the guest might find it weird because its not apart of their norm. This is something that is also mentioned in the ted talk we watched where the talker would eat PBJs

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"You want to be the same as American girls on the outside. She handed me an early gift. It was a miniskirt in beige tweed. "But inside you must always be Chinese. You must be proud you are different. Your only shame is to have shame."

I chose this quote because it reflects a lot on how assimilation is happening in the United States in how people need to feel shame in there own country because of who they are in trying to be American or in losing their identity. I feel no one should be ashamed of there culture or country we are all unique. #be proud of your culture

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When reading Fish Cheeks by Amy Tan the ending stood out to me when she said " long after I had gotten over my crush on Robert – that I was able to fully appreciate her lesson and the true purpose behind our particular menu. For Christmas Eve that year, she had chosen all my favorite foods." It stood out to me because sometimes growing up as teenagers, young adolescents we tend to not see the full picture. Obviously we are growing and will go through our own experiences that shape us into who we are. But are parents already have lived through life and Amy's mom was just trying to make sure she was happy on Christmas by making her her favorite foods. And Amy didn't realize till years later how special her mom was trying to make her feel she was to focused on the guy who didn't even pay her any attention. I think that is so sweet and above anything else we should focus on our family because they will stick beside you weather in good or bad times.