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i have come to believe the negative words spoken over me. or believed what others felt towards me by their actions and have embodied them. now, it’s time to renew my mind & how i view myself with a new set of affirmations.

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”Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.“‭‭ - Proverbs‬ ‭18‬:‭21‬

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i have become accustomed to beating myself up internally. when i would make a mistake, or i didn’t live up to my potential i would get down on myself which would spiral me into a deep depression. these days, i’m practicing grace & positive self talk utilizing my affirmations. being careful to remind myself that what we think, we start to feel & believe.

”Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.“ - Philippians‬ ‭4‬:‭8‬ ‭

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through these few months i realized how much journaling helps me process my emotions. i would like to continue to build on this habit to grow my emotional intelligence & become proficient in being able to express myself.

Types of Journaling:

1. Bible journaling

2. Emotional check-in prompts

3. Jotting down revelations from Yah

4. Process insights from books i read

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“That is, that we may be mutually encouraged by each other's faith, both yours and mine.” - Romans 1:12

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i once used to give my heart away so freely.. it became hard to trust. now with wisdom & discernment i don’t have to withhold my heart, but guard it for the right people ✨

husband, a few childhood friends, healthy sisters i’ve grown a relationship with & my truth tribe ladies 🧡

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through this self-care journey i plan to continue to break free!!!

Be free to:

love myself

accept myself

show up without dimming my light

express my heart without limits

Be free from:

social anxiety

internal paralyzation

fear of judgement

self rejection

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staying connected to Yah through his word & seeking His wisdom is what feeds me & keeps me going. allowing His word to penetrate my heart, then to take root to produce the Fruit of the Spirit.

“they can take your food, your land, your homes, seize all you have. but what they can’t take away is your Faith.” - paraphrased from the movie prince of Egypt spoken by Moses.

”But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,“ - Galatians‬ ‭5‬:‭22‬ ‭

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This is a reminder to not take on more than i can bare. don’t say yes, when i mean no. to know that i do have limits, and that doesn’t make me a bad person. i don’t have to run myself into the ground in order to “prove” my love. to let my no, be a no. to let others know what my boundaries are & uphold consequences if they aren’t being respected. to not carry the weight of other peoples perceptions on my shoulders. to know what to carry & what to give to The Most High.

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i will treat myself like a garden and water myself daily ✨

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I struggled with postpartum depression after having my daughter. i put myself on hold & stopped taking care of myself the way i did & realized i no longer was being creative. all of which fuel me & make me happy. yes, i am a mother. yes, my children depend on me. but, i cannot be the best me if i don’t nurture myself.

my life may not look like it used to pre - motherhood. i still need to make time to love on my temple & be a good steward over my gifts & talents. i won’t be able to do all that’s listed, everyday. i can give myself 20 minutes a day (at least) to take a mental / emotional break as a way to keep going throughout the day.

Outlets i enjoy:

crocheting

making youtube videos

coloring

dancing

going for a walk

journaling

reading

learning new skills

baking

going to the craft store

taking a nap

spending time alone

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”for the righteous falls seven times and rises again, but the wicked stumble in times of calamity.“‭ - Proverbs‬ ‭24‬:‭16‬ ‭

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one way the enemy has tricked me, and got my mind to go against my own self.. is to convince me that i am my mistakes. i will have an amazing week or two & when i fall short, i would hyper focus on where i messed up. proverbs 24:16 is a reminder that yes, i may fall… but i get up. i repent, i ask for my heart to be changed, i face the uncomfortable head on, i’m asking for my heart to be searched.

it’s almost like that phase your hair goes through when you chop it off & it’s seems like it’s been the same length for months, when really it’s growing. then once it’s out of the awkward stage you see how much growth actually took place & all of a sudden you realize your hair LONG! lol.

growth isn’t always linear. as long as i don’t stumble & coward to what’s supposed to make me grow i’m not the mistake. but the woman who chooses to get up daily.

i might be a small flower, those roots are growing & getting strong though. planted thoroughly & will NOT be uprooted.

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time to start looking for ways to make myself uncomfortable to continue to break free from anxiety & build confidence.