# data[].attributes.body
Inside the room, there is a girl.

The girl is staring in the window. She got something and put it in her ears then listen to a music that reminds her of all the bad memories that happened.

"Is this how bad i am, that's why no one want to trust me?"

# data[].attributes.body
An eighteen years old college student, with brown eyes, chubby cheeks, morena skin, skinny type of body, has long eye lashes and medium length of hair.

She is Janine.

# data[].attributes.body
She is the only girl in the family, that is why she is called as their princess but sometimes treated unpleasantness.

Ever since before, Janine is hard headed. She is the reason of her father and mother's stress. Her eldest brother hates her also, because of her attitude. In just a little, the World War III between them will soon to happen. How?

When she was only two years old, she is already a trouble maker. If she do something wrong, she won't be punished but her eldest brother will. That's why we can't blame her eldest brother of hating her so much until now. Since when she got to school, her mother is always called because she did something that is not good. Asking what?

# data[].attributes.body
She just punched her bully classmate in his face and didn't expect that the bully's eyes will bleed. She did that because the bully sexual harassed her, so you can't really blame her for doing that. Even though she is a girl, she can still fight for herself even without a help of someone. If someone do something wrong to you repeatedly, don't just shut up FIGHT!

There is also a time that her parents are called because they heard that Janine is included into a fight with her cousins and they were sent to Barangay.

# data[].attributes.body
Janine is described as a multi talented person and a total performer. In school, she is a shy type of person but when she is performing in stage, she's like a different person.

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.title
SOLO-TAKE ME AND SWALLA-SEÑORITA Dance Performance in Corazon C. Aquino Highschool | JaDe

# data[].attributes.body
When she is getting older, she is becoming a lady unlike before. She is now considered as a "Dalagang Pilipina" not a "Maskuladong Dalaga" anymore HAHA.

# data[].attributes.body
There we can conclude that if a person is growing up, his/her environment changes and by that, his/her attitude will change too.

When she was in second year high school, she became a secret type of person unlike before that she always open almost everything to her family. But it is different now. She always update her parents when she is leaving the house, what time she will leave and what time she will go home but when she was 15 to 17 years of age, everything is different.

She became selfish, especially when she began to fall in love.

# data[].attributes.body
We all know that when you love, you will do everything for it.

She was 15 when she had her first boyfriend but she never tell that to her parents but made it as a secret. She even disobeyed her parents for her boyfriend. I don't know why did she did something shitty. She didn't even know why is she doing those things. Disobeying her parents and lying to them. It is like there is a demon who's controlling you.

There is no secret that cannot be discover.

That is why after 2 years, her parents caught her then scolded her. That was the time when her mother's said that "I should not trusted you".

It is her fault that is why she is now suffering for what she did.

# data[].attributes.body
That time, when her family don't want to trust her again is also the time when she knew that her boyfriend is cheating on her, when her best friend betrayed her, when her boyfriend broke up with her and when she lost in a competition.

This feeling is like the world is against you.

But as time passes by, she regret all the things that she did before and wanted to change her life for a betterment because, she believed that everybody deserves second chance and everybody  can change. But still, the people who surrounds her always make her feel like she can't change and she didn't deserve second chance because she is a BAD PERSON.

And they believed that when you are bad at the first place, you can be bad until the end.

# data[].attributes.body
"It really hurts..."

Those days are so tough, she literally wanted to die on that time but she still chose to FIGHT.

All of us are born with an angel wings and it depends on you if you will paint it with black.

All of us are not perfect, we all committed sins and we all have our own type of horns.

# data[].attributes.body
A few seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, and months that almost no eat, no proper sleep and all she did was cry. If you are in that situation, I know that you will be affected of all the things that just happened.

"If only I had said it before..."

"If only I became open to them..."

"If only I think of what will be the outcome before making a decision..."

There are always IFs, just IFs... even though she already knew that she can't get everything to what it used to be Janine still chose to FIGHT.

# data[].attributes.body
"That's enough Ja!", then she removed the earphones. "Stop crying, those are just in the past. They are different from  what is happening now. Focus on what is in the present because remembering the past may ruin it..."

She forced herself to sleep but she cannot sleep. Then she saw a blade.

Then someone is whispering in her ears like it is trying to say something that she must do. She get the blade and then she can't control herself from putting it in her pulse...

Will she do it?

# data[].attributes.body
She didn't.

The next day, she is smiling but actually, that is a type of pretending.

Until now, she is entitled as a GREAT PRETENDER. She can make you laugh and smile but she cannot do it for herself. She can take care of you and accept you for who you are but she cannot do it for herself.

One time, someone chatted her. A conversation always begin with a "Hi" but unexpectedly it doesn't end with "Goodbye" because they are strong until now. That man became her best friend first. He doesn't betray her, he accepted her, he accepted her flaws, he doesn't care about her past and he loved her.

At first, Janine was worried because she is afraid of MAYBE she will do the same mistake that she did before BUT, no.

# data[].attributes.body
Everything became good this time, she became open to her parents and they accepted what she decided.

Janine just wanted to do what she like but her parents didn't want her to. Before, she wanted to die because for her, "If a flower lived, all the substandard doings will never be forgotten but when the flower die, all the adequate doings will be remembered."

All the pain from the past will never me remove.

Don't let the memories of the past ruin you. Just keep fighting, never give up no matter how big or small the problem is. Always remember that every problem has its own solution.

Don't let ANGER and SADNESS control YOU, and always become OPTIMISTIC. Life is too short, so make sure to live happy, do good things and don't expect that much.

# data[].attributes.body
It is not easy to move on but if you want to, then it will be easy for you. Because you know what, even a seed that you just planted would never become  plant that easily. It takes time. Healing takes time.

Through this story, I know that you realized a lot of things that you will carry until the end.

At this point, Janine never end her life that easy. She believed that every person deserves a second chance and every person can change. Your past doesn't define who you are. What matter is what are you in present.

And I wanted you to remember that happiness is inside of us, we just need someone to help us find it.