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Dear Giulia,

You have destroyed me. I'm sorry to tell you this, to offend your intelligence and goodness with this sentence. But it is so: it made me lose hope. Now I am afraid, now I know that even girls with your education and good family can end up so badly. At the same time you give me the strength to be able to get angry.  I think you have just started a revolt. We are all tired, we are all confused and grieving. We want to stop looking the other way, to accept as if it were normal all the pain and suffering of innocent women. It is shameful to tell each other that the world is just a horrible place. Because it is not true. Because we have become accustomed to a system that makes it seem normal. I often think of all the things you would do if you were still here with us.  To your future without Filippo, the job you wanted to choose after your studies, new friendships, and maybe a new love. To someone who really loved you. Your story reflects on a thousand others, and that's scary. I fear and admire you. You make me grow a lot of anger, thank you. I will hold on to your life and the lives of all girls like you. You help me grow, you make me strong. I don't know what the future holds for me, but I know perfectly well that you smile at me every time I think about it, every time I ask myself questions. Every time I say NO.

Sara D.

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Dear Giulia,

I'm here to dedicate a few words to you, even if nothing can describe the sorrow I feel for what happened to you and what happens every day to all women. My name is Elvis, I am a boy who fights against violence with all of my heart, I feel obliged as a man to apologize to you, I want to apologize to you personally because it is not right and we are all aware of it, we are aware of the fact that we live in a patriarchal, sexist and male dominated world but we hide it because it's convenient for us. I'm so angry that your death was caused by a name and a surname, a person who felt entitled to take you away, did he perhaps feel protected by this country? There must be a change, a revolution, a culture that teaches men to accept "no", to teach that women are no one's property, because your killer, as your sister says, is not a monster but a healthy son of the patriarchy. Therefore, as a man, I feel obliged to apologize to you. I hope with all my heart that wherever you are, it's a better place than here. Have a good trip Giulia. We will burn everything for you.

Elvis B.

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Dear son,

I am writing this letter as a reminder to teach you kindness, respect, and how to live respectfully in society. You may be wondering why a reminder: I am doing that because nowadays, like all women in the world, I cannot live in peace because I always have to be careful at all times, when I go shopping, when I come home late at night or when I go out with friends in the city centre and I'm also scared about being in love with someone. Loving a person has become dangerous and do you know why? Because many of us have not been taught the values I promise to teach you, to make sure that tomorrow girls like me don't have to be scared to live. I promise myself to bring you up with love and respect, so that the love and respect you receive you will be willing to return to anyone, no matter whether a man or a woman. Make me proud of you, be an example for your children and that will be my biggest pride. I will do everything in my power to raise you in a society in which respect for others is the main value, even if it is difficult for me to think of a future, but most of all it saddens me to think of having to leave you in such a world. I hope to make you a man with a capital 'M'.

Ilaria D.

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Dear future child,

I hope that the world you live in is a safer, more compassionate place. It kills me to think that atrocities like violence against women still persist today. Nowadays we talk a lot about this topic but unfortunately it is not new. There are plenty of stories, books or songs from a long time ago and it’s sad to think about how current they still are. In Italy just this year over a hundred women have been killed by men who said they loved them, but love does not kill. Love should be a positive and joyful feeling, it shouldn’t make you feeling anxious and scared. I hope you'll live in a world where you won't be afraid to walk around on your own, befriend someone because they might have bad intentions, or break up with someone because they don’t want to and they “can’t live without you”. I hope you'll live in a world in which values like empathy, equality and justice are respected. The key to let that happen is education. Everyone must learn about the stories of all the women who were victims of this violence. Always speak up about injustice, whether small or big. You should never underestimate the power of your voice. Try to be polite, respectful and kind to other people, try to spread awareness and education to everyone. I firmly believe that if everyone, women and men, speak up and fight for the elimination of violence, no matter whether on women, or anyone else, we will make the world a better place.

Giulia S.

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Dear daughter,

I wanted to let you know that it has happened again. Someone died, not just someone, a woman. A lot of women get killed or hurt these days by men: their husbands, fathers, boyfriends, ex-boyfriends. The reason? They did what they weren't supposed to do. You're probably wondering what I mean by that. Those women who died were under the control of their men: they couldn't go out dressed in a certain way, their messages were under control to make sure they didn't cheat and many other things. They were a possession. Probably, right now, many women in the world are being abused. If we are in this situation, we should report it to the authorities. Sadly plenty of women find it difficult because they're afraid. They get threatened if they try to. I know it's sad, but it's important to talk about this, especially because you're a girl. I'm not here to tell you that you can't live your life anymore. I want to let you know what could happen if you give someone the possibility to control you. Making them do it means letting yourself get closed into a cage. After you're closed, you can't get out of it. Always believe in yourself, don't let anybody put you down and hurt you, and live your life as you want.

Giada C.

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Dear William,

I am writing to you this letter because I think it is time to tell you about a topic which I think is very important. I hope you read this letter with attention. I want to tell you about love. Maybe you still have to find a person who makes you feel strong emotions to associate to this word. In any case I believe you must know something about this. Love is a wonderful thing and when you love you feel more alive than ever, but there aren’t only beautiful aspects, because in love you can also feel bad but this not entails that love doesn’t exist or it will never be there again. The problems in the couple can be resolved together and the moment you realize that the problems are so many and you feel bad it’s time to distance yourself. If you think you can’t live without the person you are in love with, but you see they aren't good or they need space, let them go, don’t think they are your property. Letting them go is also a sign of love. In case they are the one who put an end to your relationship and you still love them, do not threaten them. If they do something you don’t think it's appropriate, never raise your hands on them, it isn’t with violence that you sort things out, but only through dialogue. Said that, I want to spread the idea that it is normal to feel lots of emotions when you are in love, but it is not fair to do any harm to the one you're in love with. I promise I will always be there for you, I will always listen to you when you need.

Martina M.

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My dearest daughter,

I feel really sad about the recent events, especially the tragic one occurred to Giulia Cecchettin. In a world where women face a lot of violence, I want to share some thoughts with you. Most importantly, recognize your own value and strength. Don't let others define you, and make sure your voice is heard. Facing violence against women, it's important to have confidence in yourself and support other women too. Let's work together to make a world where every woman feels safe, respected, and strong. Never forget how important you are, and always stand up against any kind of mistreatment. The connection between women is a powerful way to make positive changes. As your dad, I promise to create a place where you can follow your dreams without any fear. Let our journey be a symbol of strength against violence. I hope we can contribute to a future where you, my dear daughter, live without fear and your life is valued and protected. Our journey is about getting better and making the world safer for you.

Dad

Alessandro B.

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Dear son,
You aren't born yet but I'm already worried. Living in this world isn't easy, neither if you are a girl nor if you are a boy. Not only is it worrying because of this but especially for the essential role I will play in your life. Unfortunately being a good parent isn't enough to raise a child. Society plays a very important role too and, unlikely, the current one can only be harmful. A society in which men keep thinking to be better than women, in which men keep thinking to be legitimate to abuse women if they try to stand up going as far as to kill them. A society in which women have to be afraid of walking alone on a desolate road and in which they have to be unnaturally careful about who they might meet. A society that reached 105 victims of feminicide in 11 months and that doesn't seem to be worried. My dear son, there's nothing to be taken for granted. You can't be superficial when facing problems like these. I would like you to grow up as the exception, I want you to learn about real love, because this is not love. Abusing, humiliating, mortifying, hurting and killing are not synonyms of love. Threatening and manipulating, saying that you can't live without her and then killing her. You'll never do such terrible things, because you'll learn all the values that count in life and you'll always respect every women, feeling a pure, healthy and joyful love, because love doesn't destroy or oppress. My dear son, learn how to love, not only for women, but first of all for yourself.

Ilenia C.

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Dear Giulia,

I hope that it can give you some relief to know that with your death your suffering is over. The man everyone thought was "a good guy" hurt you both psychologically and physically. You should know that it’s not your fault. The only to be blamed is a man who didn’t receive a good education, who didn’t learn the value of love, the one unable to bear the pain of abandonment and who didn’t really love you. A man who loves you, does everything to make you happy, if it hurts then it's not love. I can’t even imagine the pain and the fear you felt. If you were still here you would see the grieving of a whole country and how much your family and everyone is fighting for you and all the women wounded to death. You would be happy to know that you got your degree in Engineering and that everyone will always remember you as a determined, conscientious and sweet girl. We will always love you.

Camilla F.

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Dear son,
Sometimes the world is not a happy place, often love, which is a wonderful thing, can hurt. When you fall in love, you discover how beautiful it can be but also how painful it can be. I would like to tell you that one day you will love very much, you will build a family, you will be a father and husband. But another day you may discover that you no longer love in the same way, so don't be afraid, have the courage to express your feelings, to hurt the woman you loved and you don't love anymore. Talk to her, accept and suffer her tears, her pain, her desperation. You must always be sincere. Lies are like punches, the truth, even the ugliest one, will be appreciated sooner or later. If she says goodbye to you, cry, it's not weak to cry. Don't be ashamed of your weakness, your disappointment, your fear, your anger. Remember to always treat your girlfriends with respect, even when they disagree with you and want to distance themselves. Always find a way to have a dialogue and talk about it calmly without raising your hands or resorting to violence. Violence is never the solution. You will feel alone and heartbroken, you will look for a thousand solutions to shorten the distance created between you and her but you stop and think, ask for help from us parents who will never turn our backs on you and will help you face every problem. life is one and must be lived fully. Disappointments in love are nothing more than tests to overcome and you will have the strength and love of the people around you to help you. Surround yourself with real and valuable people. You will find strength and power and you will not feel alone.
Alena M.