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Dealing with kids is poverty is tough in my opinion, mostly because I can't relate to the extreme poverty that some kids live in.  For example, know how to bail someone out of jail, or figuring out where my next meal is coming from...these are things I've never had to tackle, and really can't speak of...with that said, I DO feel I can earn the trust of my students who live in poverty that are facing adversities everyday on the most basic level by showing a sincere, and real, interest in their lives, their academics and their futures.  I really feel it boils down to building relationships, earning trust, and earning respect...it goes a long way!

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Dealing with kids is poverty is tough in my opinion, mostly because I can't relate to the extreme poverty that some kids live in.  For example, know how to bail someone out of jail, or figuring out where my next meal is coming from...these are things I've never had to tackle, and really can't speak of...with that said, I DO feel I can earn the trust of my students who live in poverty that are facing adversities everyday on the most basic level by showing a sincere, and real, interest in their lives, their academics and their futures.  I really feel it boils down to building relationships, earning trust, and earning respect...it goes a long way!

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One of the key ways that we can positively shape our students despite the negative effects of poverty is by building a relationship with them. Students are more prone to "buy in" to their education when they trust and respect the adults they encounter regular. Some examples of how we can build those relationships are: 1) Pay attention to the non-verbals to understand the intent and the student, 2) Meet the students where they are by setting reasonable expectations, 3) Implement a "No Judgement" zone or a virtual safe space where the students feel comfortable opening up about all aspects of their life, and 4) Not only sympathize but empathize with the students and the hardships they have faced.

One thing that I have realized over the years of working with youth is that (very similarly to how dogs can sense fear), they can sense fake and phoniness. When they can tell that we genuinely want the best for them and are willing to help them achieve it they become more receptive to trusting the process. So don't be afraid to share the real you with them!

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Listening to Dr. Payne, I began to think about the students that I use to work with in Atlanta Public Schools. majority of them were improvised. They would ask for the left over food in the cafeteria to take home over the weekend so that they could have a meal. Completing homework under the street lights because there was no electricity in the home. These are all stressors that children should not have to deal with.  It was very interesting to hear the thought process of a person dealing with poverty vs. a wealthy person. I think as Advisors, it is very important to listen to our families and their needs. This will give us a better understanding of how to best serve them. 

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Listening to Dr. Payne, I began to think about the students that I use to work with in Atlanta Public Schools. majority of them were improvised. They would ask for the left over food in the cafeteria to take home over the weekend so that they could have a meal. Completing homework under the street lights because there was no electricity in the home. These are all stressors that children should not have to deal with.  It was very interesting to hear the thought process of a person dealing with poverty vs. a wealthy person. I think as Advisors, it is very important to listen to our families and their needs. This will give us a better understanding of how to best serve them. 

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~Jama Harris

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I had the pleasure of tutoring homeless students in Forsyth County, which is considered a very wealthy county. I was shocked when I found out the number of homeless families we have living in our county, and the issues the children were dealing with were heartbreaking. I loved being able to be a huge part of their support system. Providing trust and stability for children dealing with poverty is so important. Building a strong relationship and learning more about the student's home life will help you know understand what type of support they need from you.

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I lived and worked in Clayton County for almost 13 years. To get my teaching certificate I was required to take a course on poverty. Ruby Payne's podcast reminds me a lot of the course and the biggest eye opener in both is the explanation of hidden rules.  Poverty deals in trying to survive...how do you bail a friend out of jail, where is your next meal coming from, how do you get the water turned back on when you don't get paid for 2 more weeks?? Learning about the hidden rules has helped me be more understanding of the children I teach and more understanding of the parents that are just trying to make it through one more day.

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Teaching in BAM I worked in a school system with high poverty.  I was able to see first hand how being THE ONE person who truly loved, respected, believed in, and wanted the best for these students could make a dramatic difference.

Building a strong relationship with students and being trustworthy can encourage them more than we really realize.

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So many take-aways from this podcast!  I appreciated the insights into understanding the "rules" of each level of income and how some of the students we work with operate by different rules and may even have trouble with the abstract because poverty deals in the concrete.  I was also intrigued by the difference between "relationships" and "connections".  The first is what helps you "get by" and the second is what helps you "get ahead".  I hope that I will be both of those for my students.

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So many take-aways from this podcast!  I appreciated the insights into understanding the "rules" of each level of income and how some of the students we work with operate by different rules and may even have trouble with the abstract because poverty deals in the concrete.  I was also intrigued by the difference between "relationships" and "connections".  The first is what helps you "get by" and the second is what helps you "get ahead".  I hope that I will be both of those for my students.

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Raquel Cooke

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This recording said so many interesting things and ideas!!! One was the four reasons of poverty. Ruby said "When we work with communities, all four poverty reasons are present.... if you only address one, you will never move the needle." Meaning, that you can't just try to fix the one factor, you have to try to help all four factors. Secondly, I am very big on connecting with the students on a more personal level. Ruby agrees and says that we can build respect and trust this way. TOTALLY agree. I also love the term "Building human capacity". I really feel we do and encourage that every day when we work with these students!

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Building relationships!  That's what we as advisors do!  I know from experience that I will do a lot more for someone I know, 'like', and respect than for someone who I feel thinks they are 'better than me'.  I've found so many times that students don't know how to study and learn.  As I call my families I don't ask myself why these students aren't learning; on the contrary, I ask myself how can they learn in this environment.  I hear babies and other children crying and screaming in the background, dogs barking, televisions blaring, just to mention a few of the distractions.  We need to put ourselves in the students' shoes and actually teach them the hidden rules of school!  Some of the things we need to teach are abstract processes, mental models, teach the studetns how to plan, and teach the students how to ask questions.  But before the students will allow us to teach them, we have to build relationships!  Before we can build relationships, we MUST understand the family resources (sometimes poverty) and dynamics!  I could go on and on!

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Wow! She really makes you think about poverty! She is amazing!
I really experienced quite a bit of this when I worked in Clayton County, I just didn't know how to articulate it like she does. I had a class of 14 EBD boys. Once they knew I loved and respected them, they would do anything for me. We had a post test at the end of the year. They did not want to take it. I told them that test  was to grade how good of a teacher I was. They told me, "In that case, we will do our best!" :)  Relationships help you get by and connections help you get ahead!! Hidden roles really spoke to me as an introvert not knowing all the rules and feeling awkward.  Some people don't understand why I started a Non-Profit to feed kids on the weekends. They ask me why they can't just use food stamps. The fact that they spend it all the first day so they don't have to share explains so much! John is home this week. We loved listening to this. It led to a great discussion after! We are in the perfect job to make a difference. And we do everyday!

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While growing up in a very small town in middle Georgia I saw a lot of poverty.  As a matter of fact, my family was very poor, but my parents were extremely supportive of anything that I wanted to do to better myself and break the cycle of poverty.  When I was in 7th grade, I became very good friends with a young lady whose family was what I considered to be very wealthy.  I made up my mind, at that time, that I was going to have money someday myself and not have to worry about where every dollar was coming from.  I decided that I was going to college no matter what it took so that I could be like my friend and enjoy life without always having the cloud of worry hanging over me.  Having this relationship during that time of my life motivated me to get an education so that I could have a better job when I was older and avoid the poverty that I had grown up with.  I have always know that my relationship with Pam is what set me on the right path for my future and what led me to getting a college degree.  Because of my friendship with this girl, in 7th grade, I starting trying my best to make all As so that I would be worthy of getting into college when I graduated high school.  My goal was to always make a better grade than my friend so that worked out really well for me and did indeed help me to get into the college of my choice.  So when Ruby talked about education, relationships and employment being the key to getting out of poverty it really struck home for me.  We always think about those positive relationships between an adult and a student, but sometimes it can be that positive relationships with our peers that makes a huge difference in our lives too.

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We can build respect and trust by addressing their immediate needs--whether it be through a social worker or just sharing numbers for community organizations we know about. It is also important that we teach our students how to ask for academic help and how to advocate for themselves. The biggest message we can get across to our students is "Today is not tomorrow"--there are possibilities available that you may not see at this moment or opportunities that are outside your reach now--but tomorrow can be a whole new story. Also addressing the relationship worries can be beneficial--progressing to a higher income level than your family does not mean you have to leave them--it empowers you to help them more. Success doesn't equal forgetting who you are or where you are from...

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We can build respect and trust by addressing their immediate needs--whether it be through a social worker or just sharing numbers for community organizations we know about. It is also important that we teach our students how to ask for academic help and how to advocate for themselves. The biggest message we can get across to our students is "Today is not tomorrow"--there are possibilities available that you may not see at this moment or opportunities that are outside your reach now--but tomorrow can be a whole new story. Also addressing the relationship worries can be beneficial--progressing to a higher income level than your family does not mean you have to leave them--it empowers you to help them more. Success doesn't equal forgetting who you are or where you are from...

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Michelle Braxton

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Ruby talks about what students need to get "out" of poverty - education, relationships and employment. I feel that as Advisors, we need to really own the relationship piece.  We have the opportunity to fill the gap that many of our students have never had... a personal relationship with someone that believes in them! Earn their trust and respect... be the ONE that makes a difference in a life!
Laurie McDaniel

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Changing their belief!

Ruby talks about how in most situations dealing with poverty, the belief is that “real men don’t push paper” and then talking about the young man that felt like if he worked to make and “A” in a subject would lose friends!  WOW!!  That mindset really limits a person in so many ways.  I feel that reaching our students now and sharing real world experiences as examples of how to break away from those beliefs will help them see that they do have many more doors available to them.  Thus, we must build that relationship and increase their trust levels in us.  Without that trust, the student will not even give what we say a second thought!  We must remold their belief system so that they believe in themselves and willing to step outside of the box they have put themselves in!  We must also offer examples of how to step out the box, not just tell them there are ways to do it.  Ruby mentioned that their environment demands what they need to survive and they must negotiate for what they don’t have.  If a student is having to choose a job, just to put food on the table and keep the lights on at the house to help the family or go to school, well the choice seems to be obvious! However, we can offer them an alternate solution, we can work very closely with all our school resources, offer constant support DAILY (not just bi-weekly in a case like this – this student needs to know you really care – a simple phone call/test goes a long way) and show them the way to succeed!

Build that trust – follow through with your promises – and be supportive!

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I think we can be a light at the end of the tunnel for a lot of our HS population. Sometimes we are the only friendly voice that they hear and we are the only help they have to get them through a rough day. We have to build trust and let them know that we are there for them not just to help them get their education but as a friend. In building that key relationship, we can be a positive force that helps that student want to do better and want more out of life than what they currently are going through.

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My favorite quote from the podcast was “models are representations, not reality”. So many of our students already have a growth mindset that they are failures, unteachable, and disadvantaged because of their environment or circumstance. I believe we can positively impact our students if we can get them to see a different mental model of reality then what has been laid before them. If students believe they can achieve, they will risk trying…It is up to us to define that new reality for them!
~Jessica Davis

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I could listen to Ruby Payne all day. I do hope she will continue to update her research as I am positive the number of children in poverty in this country would continue to stagger the minds of politicians and people in the community. There is so much yet to learn about poverty.  One line that really stuck with me was "If you want to change culture, take work away from men." That was so deep. Last year I tried to help my students develop communication skills since those skills were not being taught in most homes. Teaching formal register, the language of school and work was one of my focuses with my students last year, and I will continue to teach it again this year. I helped students compose emails to teachers or administrators. We talked about how you address a leader or a boss  when writing or speaking to them directly (not- "Hey, I need this" or typing list you're texting). It was a beneficial lesson.

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Ruby Payne discussed many interesting points in this podcast. I feel that most importantly we, as advisors, need to build strong relationships with not only the students, but also the parents. 

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Ruby Payne discussed many interesting points in this podcast. I feel that most importantly we, as advisors, need to build strong relationships with not only the students, but also the parents. 

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~Jennifer Carver

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Dr. Payne talks about how the less resources a student has, the more difficult it is for them to plan.  That statement stood out to me because working with high school students tends to include assisting them with planning for their academic and professional future.  However, due to the lack of resources, this can be an unrealistic goal for some of these students.  Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs is a theory that tells us that without our basic needs being met, it is more difficult for us to excel in life.  As advisors working with the at-risk learner population, it's imperative for us to remember that WE are the "basic need" for many of these students.  Simply being present in their lives and letting them know that they CAN achieve is how we can make a positive impact in their life of negative circumstances.

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How do we fix the roads?  We test the students, we address school issues, but don't do anything about the neighborhoods, yet we expect all students from all walks of life to come in and perform the same.  We need to examine, on an individual basis, the needs of our students so we can help each student break the barrier and fix the roads.
Stacey Garbow

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The quote above from Ruby Payne’s podcast really stuck with me.  I think that as an educator, this is crucial to remember.  How students spend their time determine what they know and determines what they get done.  My goal is an adviser is to build a strong relationship with students.  A relationship built on trust, understanding, and connections.  From there, I want to guide them to utilize effective techniques to set goals, manage time, and use these skills in their daily life.  I want to meet them where they are.  Provide support.  Provide resources for both LC’s and students.    Behaviors, jobs, exploitation, and political/economic structures are all interwoven, and I may not be able to address all, but I can certainly do my part.  Providing students with opportunities to spend “time” actively engaged with GCA – that’s my plan! ~Fran Rollins

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We can build solid, sincere relationships with our students in order to achieve trust. This will provide a safe space and person for a student in a difficult neighborhood or situation to come to for support. - Ashley Cline