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Maybe for next year, some scenarios would be helpful for parents at the All Parent Night. AKA: These are common emails/topics that come up, and here is our policy/advice.

I think it's really helpful to read the email examples and see what we're actually dealing with.

Do we have guidance for concerns about grades? Like is there a protocol or standard responses? - Malia

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Above is the Challenge Success data from across their high school surveys.

What does our data actually say about student stress levels? Is Archer unique? Does the "vibe" match responses on surveys?

I also think this isn't an overnight fix, so keeping track of what we're doing and COMMUNICATING that to students/families is critical. -Malia

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Let's come back to stress. It's not always a bad thing. It's a (necessary) part of life. When it IMPACTS daily operations is when it's cause for concern.

If students are using effective coping strategies. GREAT!

So, it's less about eliminating stress or being scared of stress, but it is about making sure the amount of it is not inhibiting most daily life through the use of coping mechanisms.

There is uncertainty with the college application process, and that's part of it. No amount of coffee from a Senior coffee cart is going to change that.

I think we could work on reframing it. - Malia

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How can we create more flexible time in the schedule? KT, don't kill me, but I'd love to see scheduling options. -Malia

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+1 to Malia's suggestion about scenarios. I think some (comedic, but purposeful) role-playing might help us model that to the parents AND to seniors. I also think it would be SO helpful for some messaging from leadership about teachers as professionals with expertise in grading would be useful. -Kristin

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This question and these emails make me think about Haidt's research around how much more fragile the current generation is. I think we need to talk more about how we, as adults, deal with disappointment and setbacks. -Kristin

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See my comment about fragility in Q2. We meed to model stress management and get real with the students about those necessary coping skills to thrive as an adult. -Kristin

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HA HA MALIA. No, but seriously, it's always the tension between Eng/hist/science, who love A/B block schedule, and math/language, who need to see students more frequently. I feel like our schedule currently as as close as we are going to get with a compromise. That said, I think there are already some opportunities built in for students to work on college stuff (HD is almost all college app workshop time S1, for example). I wonder if the no-phone policy is going to reduce that S1 stress because students will be so much more productive on campus than they used to be. Also, a number of seniors have said they desperately need some quiet inside spaces to work since the library is often closed and they have been told they can't work in the Lantern Room alone. Can we offer some quiet classroom work spaces like we do during exams? I don't mind seniors working in my room, for example, even if I'm not there all the time. If we want to prepare them for college independence, I think we need to trust them to work independently in spaces without direct supervision. -Kristin

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Honestly, I haven't seen more stress than I usually see from seniors so far. It seems a pretty normal level for S1. -Kristin

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I agree with KT that the stress levels (so far) seem pretty normal -- although I haven't gotten to spend a lot of time with my group yet. During our check-in this morning, two students described feeling anxious all the time, and one said that this anxiety leads to stomachaches and other physical sensations. I will definitely keep an eye on her!

Bethany

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Some kids want more time to work on HW & college apps, some want more downtime to relax -- and there are the senior events like the Haunted House that take up a lot of time. This is a tough one! Maybe more M&M time that's not structured, so they can make the choice for themselves about how to use their time (while also talking to them about how to figure out what they need -- will they feel better after playing games and relaxing for half an hour? Or studying for half an hour?).

Bethany

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I concur with Malia & KT -- reframing, helping them unpack what's causing stress and consider what they can and can't control. And continue to counsel kids in lower grades to think about their course load, extracurriculars, etc. and to be honest and realistic about what they want to take on.

Bethany

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The question made me ponder whose expectations we're talking about. Teachers' expectations of their 12th grade students? Parents' expectations for their kids' grades and college acceptances? Kids' expectations of the same? For the latter two, consistent messages from the College Office and the school are important. For the first one, I do think we are trying (using the assessment calendar, having no-HW weekends), but reminders to 12th grade teachers about student stress levels might be helpful.

Bethany

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Maybe more data from the College Office?

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Maybe more data from the College Office?

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Archer seniors stress about college -- and then most of them are quite happy with their college choices. So maybe reminding them and their parents that the outcome is going to be fine? Also maybe hearing from alums (in or recently out of college) about how things turned out okay?

Bethany

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I worked with this grade last year on stress and coping and we talked about the importance of having a “coping kit” to go to during challenging times. It might be a good idea to have them make new ones for themselves. Might also be great to remind them of the difference between eustress and distress while also recognizing that a good percentage of their stress is likely internal and there are things they can due to mitigate negative symptoms.

I’m implementing the WRAP (Wellness Recovery Action Plan) model for 10th and 11th this year and am considering doing the same for 12th when I see them next semester. It’s a great tool to help them take responsibility for their mental health.

-Dani

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I second the need for quiet spaces. I’m also happy to offer up the TC when I don’t have class in there. I do think that the phone policy will help with productivity but I’m also weary of their need to be productive 24/7. I worry about their lack of play and constant stress about getting assignments done. How can we get them to understand that not every assignment is going to make or break their college prospects?

Unstructured mentorship/FLX time is a good idea and I also plan to address how they’re spending their time in 1 on 1 meetings making sure they have a good balance between work and play.

-Dani

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There is SO MUCH pressure to succeed with our students. In 11th grade right now we’re talking about whose pressure that is. Is it coming from themselves? Parents? Teachers? Are we all letting each other’s expectations impact our own? This prompt just leaves me with more questions than answers. At times I feel like I’m screaming into the void about them taking care of their mental health.

I’m thinking that Archer needs to get more messaging to parents about loosening the reigns and making a conscious effort to not put so much pressure on the kids and hopefully that will lessen the amount of pressure the kids put on themselves. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-Dani

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What are some things we can do to help address the pressure kids (and their families) are feeling about grades and college?

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What are some things we can do to help address the pressure kids (and their families) are feeling about grades and college?

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Tough question. As a school, we claim that we're not putting pressure on kids about college, but then we turn around and assign kids a college guidance counselor in 10th grade. What message are families really receiving? Kids absorb the tone of their environment - they get pressure from the media, from their friends, and from home. We've got to take the emphasis off of college in general. We should start advocating for more kids to take a gap year - dedicate themselves to service in some way.Give them a break and some time to figure out what they want without the looming shadow of college applications. (I also think Mike should give his "Why I Teach" talk to the kids. Seriously!)

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What role should the school play in balancing academic expectations with students’ mental health?

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What role should the school play in balancing academic expectations with students’ mental health?

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I don't know what's happening in every class, so I can't speak for everyone, but I do think that we should start managing expectations through accurate assessment rather than inflated grades that provide a false sense of success. If we want kids and parents to stop nitpicking and grade grubbing, we have to change their expectations earlier on. I'm not suggesting we assign kids failing grades - simply that we're grading based on mastery, not sympathy. When an A- is cause for a cataclysmic emotional storm, that storm has an origin story that can be traced back to experience. If grades were an honest reflection of fair assessments from day one of sixth grade, then a B in tenth grade can be cause for celebration rather than despair.

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How can we help students navigate the pressure to perform academically while maintaining their well-being?

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How can we help students navigate the pressure to perform academically while maintaining their well-being?

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I agree with Malia - and I think Dani's approach will benefit them both during this difficult year and beyond.

Stress isn't going to go away simply because senior year is over. It's only just begun.

However, what they're experiencing feels very intense - I don't question that at all. I wonder how we can recapture the tone of the retreat on a more regular basis.

Playfulness works wonders for kids and adults alike.

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How can we make time for students to recharge and manage stress amid college applications and school responsibilities?

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How can we make time for students to recharge and manage stress amid college applications and school responsibilities?

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Make the Archer School for Parents mandatory, and use the time to provide parenting workshops and family therapy.

I'm only half kidding.

When I worked in teen residential treatment, we wouldn't accept a kid into a program unless the parents committed (under contract) to both individual and family therapy.

The logic was simple - if you get a kid into a good place through therapy and helping them learn healthy practices and coping strategies, but then you send them back to a place where they face the exact same environment that got them into treatment in the first place, what are the odds for success?

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What signs of stress, anxiety, or burnout are you noticing in our students this year?

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What signs of stress, anxiety, or burnout are you noticing in our students this year?

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I agree that the stress level seems about average. I would argue that the absence of screens has improved the students' stress level.

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What are some things we can do to help address the pressure kids (and their families) are feeling about grades and college?

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What are some things we can do to help address the pressure kids (and their families) are feeling about grades and college?

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This may be controversial/unpopular, but here goes...

The pennant hanging and college sweatshirt wearing are traditional Archer senior rites of passage. I wonder about the messaging and pressure these traditions place on our students... that everyone will be watching for the big reveal about where they will go to school. Is there a way to celebrate their achievements more privately and give them other rites of passage that don't contribute to the pressure of expectations?

-Hanna

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Can we present data showing that future happiness and income are not as strongly correlated with college choice as many seem to think?

Are there ways to help students define their self worth in healthy ways other than achievement and external approval (i.e. grades and college acceptance)?

How much are parents overtly pushing their kids? How much are kids modeling themselves on type-A hyper-successful parents to whom they may feel they can never measure up?

BTW, as if it isn't tricky enough, Padlet is prompting us to "Write something beautiful..."--what sorts of prompts are conditioning our students to feel inadequate in little things as well as the big ones?

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Are academic expectations driving mental health concerns?

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Are academic expectations driving mental health concerns?

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I'm curious about how much what we expect from the students is driving current mental health issues as opposed to what they expect others to think about them based on their grades.

Are their beliefs about what grades say about them more of a problem than what we ask them to do?

Is there a way to decouple performance and value as a student? Is there a way to more clearly incentivize improvement through retakes, alternative ways of demonstrating mastery, etc.?

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I’ve been trying to convince them of studies showing sleep is better than cramming the night before a test (have faith in your subconscious, even if you think you will “remember” more from cramming, your sleep-deprivation will impair your performance even more, etc.)

Not sure if they believe me.

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Are we stuck in an inevitable arms race where any and all free time outside of school will be filled by test prep and extracurriculars (regardless of whether parent or student instigated)?

How can we make mentorship a hard no-study period when they’re often in near panic about the next class? (And often pushing back that cramming is more calming than relaxing group activities, since they can’t get their mind off of whatever is due.)

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Students & mentees are already checking grades between classes, during FLX, etc.

Some are talking about the overload of applying to 12+ schools.

As an aside, before the trip, I screwed up and left an imported assignment on automatic and Canvas posted 50% to the entire class before I even gave the assignment - unsurprisingly, they freaked out within 2 minutes.