# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start the game.

Laughter filled the park as Rey and his friend played the blindfolded game. Suddenly, Rey tripped over a rock and fell down. He realised he had a cut on his leg. All his friends ran away accept except for Ethan, his best friend. Rey asked Ethan, "Why didn't you run away?" he shouted. Rey answered, "I've been your friend since Primary 1. We must help each other when in need." Ethan placed a plaster on Rey's injured leg and walked Rey  him home. When Rey's mother saw his injured leg, she shouted and asked worriedly, "What happened?" Ethan explained everything to Rey's mother her. Rey 's mother She thanked Ethan very much for helping him  Rey. Ethan replied, 'No problem, Auntie".

Very good effort, Elzan!
You have expanded the moment and I liked the part when Rey asked Ethan why he didn't run away!
However, do use the paragraph that was given (I bolded it.)

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Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start the game. The first game  It was called "Blind Mouse". John was the catcher and started the game. He held his hands out and walked around, trying to find us. We ran around the house so that he could not catch us. Soon, he tagged Fred  who was tagged first and became the catcher. We enjoyed the game.

Good effort, Rizal!
Do note that it would be difficult to run when one is blindfolded. You can also expand the part where John started the game. What did he do?

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Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend John. We were ready to start our game . Since it was my birthday party, I got to chose the game. We were playing played "Hide and Seek". We were having so much fun until John fell and hit his hand on the door. This really was a memorable party.

Good effort, Ashriel!
Do try to expand the moment. What happened after John fell? Was he badly hurt?
How was the party memorable? Was it because of John's fall?

# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend John. We were ready to start our game.
As it was John’s birthday celebration, we blindfolded him and started our very first game, ‘’Hide and Seek’’! John then started counting from 1 to 10 as we ran around finding a place to hide so that he will would not catch us. Very soon, We all get were so excited that we started running around John. making it known for him to catch us. As time went by, he managed to catch a few of us. as we ran around him. After 10 about ten minutes into the game, John’s mother shouted for us to have our lunch. Feeling famished, all of us headed to the dining room and started digging in. There were so much food that we all loved! We chatted while we had our lunch and soon the dining room was filled with so much laughter. All of us enjoyed ourselves, especially John! I bet he had a memorable birthday celebration with us today.

Very good job, Kycia!
I like the word "famished".
Do be mindful of the tenses, though. You can also write more about the food. What was served?

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Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game. John was trying tried to catch us while we ran around, were trying to not to get caught. "1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10! Ready or not, here I come," John shouted.  While he was searching for us, he felt something warm and grabbed hold of it. He took off his blindfold and saw that he had caught my hand. "Hah! I win!" said John.  "Well done," I said. I called out to my friends and we went to the dining table to have lunch, prepared by my father. Dad had prepared all the foods that we love, like fried chicken wings, pepperoni pizza and french fries, to name a few. We had a scrumptious lunch and when we had finished eating, we said goodbye to each other. It was an unforgettable birthday party.

Good job,  Josiah!
You have expanded the moment, from the game to the food.

# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game. We played "Hide and Seek". "10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1,0. Ready or not, here I come!" John shouted. He went around searching for his friends in the garden. All of us hid in ran around in different places. "Got you, it is Matthew!" exclaimed John and as he removed his blindfold. Matthew reluctantly put on the blindfold and started the game over again. After the game ended, we smell smelt the aroma of food. It wafted through the air. Immediately, we ran into the house and saw all the delicious food prepared by John's mother. Everybody enjoyed the food and company at the party. It was the most wonderful party I have attended.

Very good effort, Jzavier!
Do be mindful of the place where the game took place. You didn't mention it and then you wrote that all of you ran into the house!

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Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend John.We were ready to start our game.
As it was Eric's birthday,he got to choose who will be blindfolded.
We started our game of ''Hide and Seek''in the house.
''1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10 ready or not here I come!''John shouted.
John went around the house searching for us. As John was searching, he heard laughs coming from the bedroom.He
immediatly dashed to the bedroom.He found Jane and Joseph hiding under the bed.
Just as he was about to leave the room,he heard voices in the kitchen.He found Jack and Ben
hiding behind the freezer.As he found the rest, he realised that Eric was not found yet.He searched everywhere in the house
but Eric was just too good at hiding.It took 3 hours to find him.
Eric had a great time celebrating his birthday.It was indeed an unforgettable birthday party.

(156 words)

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Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend,John.We were ready to start our game.We were celebrating Ben's birthday today.He invited us to his birthday party.The first game that we played was "Pin The Tail Of The Donkey".We queued up to play the game.John was the first one.He spun around three times and walked to the board to pin the tail.When he took out his blindfold,he saw that the tail was almost at the point where he should pin.Everybody cheered loudly.Then,they continued playing.After a while,Ben's mother called out that lunch is ready.We rushed to the dinning room.There was fried chicken wings,pizzas and chicken nuggets,to name a few.For desserts,we ate cheese cake,chocolate ice cream and blueberry tart.We ate to our hearts contented.After eating,we went to Ben's room to play toys.After a while,it was time for us to go back home.Ben said goodbye and we left.Ben thought that it was a memorable birthday party

# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game,
" hide and seek catching. ''John was ''it''. So,he counted,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10! Ready or not,here I come!John stumbled around the room,trying to find us.We ran round the room,trying our best to get away from John.But suddenly, he threw a tantrum and ran away. We ran after John,trying to comfort the furious boy.He dashed into the toilet and locked himself in one of the toilet stalls,sobbing. Not long after,he calmed down and strolled out of the stall.As though nothing had happened,so,we continued to play the different games and ate the savoury food such as fried prawn noodles and sweet and sour pork belly.As for desert,we had ice kachang and ginger beer float!It was a memorable birthday party after all!

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Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded John. We were ready to start our game, "Pin The Piñata". I gave John a stick. He missed hitting the pinata the first time so he tried again. This time, he passed. managed to hit it. All the sweets inside the piñata dropped to the ground and we quickly picked  it them up. Everyone took as many sweets as they could. Soon, my mother called out to us saying that the food was ready. "Race you to the kitchen," I exclaimed.

Very good effort, Abigail!
The "game" was interesting. You can also describe the food. What was served? For the last part, with whom did you race?

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Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game called "Hide and Seek". then John counted from one to ten. In those Â few seconds, we hide then hid from John.  start finding. First, he found his friend, Joy. Then he found Joshu. Lastly, he found Kaden, the birthday boy. Then they Soon, we were all started feeling hungry. They  and ate Kaden's mother's cooked food. "It is delicious," said Joshua . Then Kaden friend We went home after the party . Kaden though felt happy because it was an unforgettable birthday for him.

Very good effort, Fan Bin!
You managed to expand the moment. Do use the pronoun "we" because you are included in the story from the beginning. You may also write about the food - what food was served?

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Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game. I chose John as it was my birthday and he was my best friend. The game was called ''Pin The Tail On The Donkey''.

Very good effort, Sanjay!
You can expand on other parts of the story when you start writing the story. Examples:  What happened during the game? What food was served?

# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the room  as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game, "Pin the Donkey on the Tail". John had thought that I had made a mistake and had said in a confused manner, "Isn't it "Pin the Tail on the Donkey"?" but I explained it to him. "1,2,3, stick!" John removed his blindfold and exclaimed in his best donkey voice,"Help! My tail is covering my eyes!" Everyone giggled so much, they rolled on the floor.

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Laughter filled the air as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game, "Hide and seek". It was my birthday so I chose who was the "seeker". John started counting,"1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,ready or not, here I come!" We all giggled as John stumbled everywhere, trying to get used to being blindfolded and walking. But we underestimated him. He found nearly all my friends. He found Me, Benny, Chris, Penny and Nancy. He did not find Wendy and Angel.

# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the room as we
blindfolded our friend, John. We
were ready to start our game.
It was Ben's birthday, so he gets
got to choose who will would be blindfolded. We were playing played "Hide and Seek" in the living room. John was stretching stretched his hands out and walking walked across the living room, hoping to catch someone. John finally caught Mary. After playing for a while, Ben's mother called us to have lunch. The fragrance of Thai Green Curry filled the air. There were also a few of my favourite food such as crispy chicken wings and the freshly prepared otah wrapped in banana leaves. For dessert, we had sundae. There were strawberry and peppermint chocolate flavours and colourful toppings to choose from. After the dessert, we moved on to the most interesting part of the afternoon, that is -- presenting Ben his birthday gift. Ben opened it excitedly and saw his favourite football jersey. He jumped  with joy and thanked his friends us for the surprise. It was an unforgettable birthday party.

Good job, Kai Zhe!
Very good description of the food. I could just imagine them!

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Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to play our game, Hide and Seek. We hid and giggled while John counts from one to ten. After counting, John started to find us. when the aroma of food distracted John . John shouted, "guys maybe we should pause this game for a while and eat ." I, too was distracted, when suddenly John's mother called us" Children, get into the house, its time to eat!" There are lots of foods like spaghetti, mac and cheese and fried chicken to name a few. While I was gobbling up one more piece of fried chicken , I said"your mother is a great cook" . We ate and ate until we're full. But that's not the ending, John is about to eat one more plate of spaghetti, suddenly he screamed.As he is about to get a stomach ache and vomit.

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Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded  our friend, John.We were ready to start our game. John started to count and everybody hide from him . We all giggle because John walked like a monster . John caught his brother Jack.While John was counting his mother called to go to the other room . The room was filled with   aroma of food !Everybody rushed to the food happily. The party ended with everyone received a glow in the dark nerf gun!We all shouted"Best party ever"

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Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend , John. We were ready to start our game.We played quite a few games.We played "Three Blind Mice" first.

Good effort, Jzavier!
Do expand the moment when you start writing the story.
Examples:  What happened during the game? What food was served?

# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game. The first game that we played is Blind-Tag.  We chose John to be the catcher as it  was his birthday. John counted from one to twenty when they are finding where to hide. John started to find them. "Caught you!' said John. Peter is now the catcher! Peter took his blind-fold and started counting. He started finding and tripped on a puddle of water. Everyone rushed out and see what is happening. John helped him out and asked him "are you okay?" Peter said he is okay. After playing, my mother called everyone for lunch. We sat down and everyone sang the birthday song. After singing the birthday song, John made a wish, blow the candles and cut the cake. After that, we ate lunch and helped to place all the food that my mother had prepared. She prepared pizza, fried chicken, fries and burger. We are full and contented. It was a memorable birthday party in my life.

(178 Words)

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Laughter filled the air as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game. We were ready to start our game of Hide And Seek. We all have chosen John to be the "It". We then went to hide. I did not know where to hide so i was scared that John will find me as i wanted to be the first in the game. Out of the blue, John's mother hollered, "Children,  lunch is ready!" We then bolted to the dining table. Our mouths watered as we stared at the delicious food. There were many varieties of food. There were crispy chicken wings, pasta, a humongous cake in the center the table and my favourite cookies. We ate to our hearts' content. After eating, we went to play some video games. After the party, my friends and I said goodbye to John and went home miserably. This is an unforgettable birthday party!

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Laughter filled the air as we were blindfolded our friend, John.It was finally my birth day. we were playing Hide and seek "1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10"`John was counting one to ten, he was jumping up and down in excitement as he was ready to find us. We giggled in delight as we hide into room in the basement. "This is the most secret place in this house"I said.After an hour, John went to the basement he knew that we were hiding some where in the basement because we heard something falling down in the basement.

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Laughter filled the air as we blindfolded our friend , John were ready to start our game. We were playing played "Hide and Seek". John was the seeker. He was Blindfolded he was finding walked around slowly, trying to find his friends. and he went to his room and Eventually, he fill somting felt something.  and He open took off his blindfolded blindfold and he saw his friend, Tom. And Soon, the game was over and it is was time for to cut John's birthday cake. every of his friend sit  All of us sat at the table and ate the delicious cake. After we ate had eaten the cake, we watched a movie.

Very good effort, Syaqir!
You could expand the moment by writing the type of cake that was served (Eg. chocolate)

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Laughter filled the air as we blindfolded our friend , John. We were ready to start our game. I was celebrating my birthday so I choose who would be 'it'. We were playing," Hide and Seek ". We giggled as John stumbled around like a baby learning to walk. Soon he got used to the blindfold and started running around with his hands out in front. When he turned a corner, there was a loud crash and a scream.

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Laughter filled the air as we blindfolded our friend , John. We were ready to start our game. We were playing  played "Hide And Seek". John was the seeker. We all hid trying not to laugh as he stumbled slowly . Suddenly, we heard John scream in pain. We all rushed to the scene.

Very good, Ashton!
I liked how you used suspense and it made me want to read more.

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Laughter filled the air as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game. The game we were playing was 'Pin the Tail on the Donkey'.
John was stumbling around the living room as he tried to identify where was the donkey. We laughed and snickered at him. He looked like a zombie walking around the room trying to find something.
After we finished playing the games, we decided to eat. There were many varieties of food on the dining table. There was a big cake in the center, a bowl full of candies and my favorite pasta. We dug into the food and must have eaten thousands of sweets! John was wolfing down a big mouthful of pasta when he shouted "this is the best food ever!".
We were all feeling full and contented at the end of the party. We went home happily with great memories of the party.

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Laughter filled the air as we blindfolded our friend, John.  We were ready to start our game. Our first game was called 'Pin The Tail On The Donkey'.  John was the seeker as he was the birthday boy.  We laughed as he walked in circle.  Suddenly, John walked into his bedroom and pierce one of a drawing he drew. It was alright for him because that is not his favourite drawing.  When it is dinner time, we ran to the table to see what food was available.  On the dinning table displayed with different types of food such as mushroom soup, spaghetti, chicken wings and pizza, to name a few.  After the dinner, we got to watch a magic show. For the last trick, the magician asked for a volunteer and make him disappear. After John blew the candles and cut the cake. We ate the cake abd went back home merrily.  It was a memorable birthday party.

# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the room as we
blindfolded our friend, John.We were ready to start our game.
We were going to play" Pass the
present." We sat in a circle and
the music started to play. We passed the present around. When the music stopped, the
present was in one of our friend
, Mary's arms. She tore open the wrapping paper and found a stuffed toy elephant. She hugged
it and squealed delightedly. We
clapped and then the music
started to play again. After the
game ended, my mother called
us down for lunch.The tempting aroma of the freshly prepared lunch was creating a desperate
hunger in all of us so we sat down as my mother placed the food on the table.There was pizza, chicken wings and brownies to name a few, then for dessert there was cake, jelly and ice cream. Finally, it was time for my friends to leave. They thanked my mother for the delectable food. I waved them goodbye and watched them leave. It was an unforgettable party.

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Laughter filled the air as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game. It was the end of my birthday party. It was time to hit the rainbow coloured pinata! I gave John a stick to hit the pinata. We took turns hitting it. "Whack!" Mary hit it and the pinata burst open. All the sweets fell to the floor. All my friends cheered loudly and quickly scrambled to pick up the sweets. Jessie did not get any sweets so she became upset and threw a tantrum I tried to calm her down and gave her some of my sweets. She was grateful and thanked me. My friends sang a birthday song for me and I cut the cake. The chocolate cake was scrumptious.
Everyone had a whale of a time. It was the best party I ever had!

(141 words)

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Laughter filled the air as we blindfold our friend ,John. We were ready to start our game.John's classmates came to his
house to celebrate his birthday . we shifted everything as we were playing blindfold-catching as it was his birthday, he got to be the catcher first. As his friend ,tom helped him put on his blindfold .John ran around to tap a person, he found somebody and caught her he took of the blindfold and found out he caught May ,another friend of his.May took the blindfold and started finding around and tripped over something and fell hard on the floor everybody went to gather around her carrying her to a bed .Some stayed back to see what she tripped on ,they found a rock on the floor "That must be it!" tom shouted"May must have tripped over the stone!"Tom shouted once more.they started asking around whose rock it is.

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Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game.

We are going to play "Three Claps", exclaimed John. We have a total of three claps I explained. After the game my mother called us for lunch. We sat down while my mother place all the many variety of food on the table. There was sushi, pizza and spaghetti to name a few. After we were done eating, it was time to cut the cake. Every body sang "Happy Birth Day To You". After we sang we decided to continue our game. John stumbled around the house nervously. John requested for his first clap "Clap"! John then noticed that i was near him, I was breathing very deeply John then heard me and I was caught me. After playing my friends had to leave I sadly waved them goodbye, it was the most memorable time in My life.

(157 words)

# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game. The game we were playing was "Pin the tail on the Donkey" Me and my friends laughed raucously as John pinned the tail on the donkey's head. My class was celebrating my birthday and I was feeling happier than I had ever felt before in my whole life. Pure joy coursed through my veins as I laughed along with the audience, staring at John's vain attempts to pin the tail on the donkey's behind. I was still amazed by all the hard work and money my parents had put into the party.

# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game. I explained that John was blindfolded because he was the catcher. "Start!" I yelled. Instantly, everyone started running and shouting everywhere. At a moment, I felt something tugging at my shirt as I was running. As I turned around, I saw that John had caught me! "Gotcha!" John said. He took out the blindfold and gave it to me."Now, I am the catcher and I will catch everyone!" I shouted. Everywhere around me in the living room, people were screaming as I tried to catch someone.

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Laughter filled the air as we blindfolded our friend ,Jhon.We were ready to start our game.The game.The game we were playing was "Pin the Tail on the Donkey".As it was my birthday I got to start first so I tried to pin the tail onto somthing but I cauld not.Then I aaccidentally pinnid pinned the tail on my friend clothe.Then I took of my blindfold, looked  for the tail and where I pinned it.While I was Looking for it, my friend, Peter came to me with the tail where did you get the Donkey's tail ,Isaid I found the it on me, peter said then the game ended and it was launch time .when they went to the dining room ,they smelled the aroma of food .When they reach the dining room on the tables were many variety. There were burgers, mni cup cake and pizza to name a few and it was a unforgettable birthday.

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Laughter filled the air as we blindfolded our friend ,John. We were ready to start our game. The game we were playing was ''Blind Mice''. Since it was my birhtday party,I got to chose who will be the blind mice and the rest will be the mice."The blind mice will be blindfolded and have to catch one of the mice,"I explained. "Start!" Everyone near John started running away from him while he slowly stumbled towards them.After a few minutes, John had caught his twin sister, Bella. Now, she will be the blind mice.We played four rounds and proceeded to the next part of the party, eating and cutting the cake.

# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game. The first game we played was" blind mice." When John was trying to catch one of us, I accidentally
laughed as one of our friends, Peter, did funny faces. I got caught and said to Peter, "I'm going to get you Peter!" After finish playing, I smelled the aroma of the food from the dining room. All of us headed to the dining room. I saw many variety of foods on the table. There were pizza, mini burgers, fries and cupcakes to name a few. After everyone had finish eating, it was time to cut the cake. Everyone in the dining room sang the birthday song to me. I cut the cake and my father took a picture of all of us. I make a wish and blew the candle. Everyone was eating the cake happily. Then, it was time to go home. I waved to them and thanked them for coming to my party. It was an unforgettable celebration.

# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game. The first game we played was "Pin the Tail on the Donkey".

Good effort, Julian!
Do expand the moment.
What happened during the game? What food was served?

# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game.
We were celebrating John's tenth birthday. The first game we played was "Pin the Tail on the Donkey". We spun John three times before he pinned the donkey's tail.It was very hard for John to find his way around.We let room for John to pass.We were screaming and shouting at the same time.
To our surprise, our friend Raymond , his father, was standing near the donkey picture. John went the wrong direction and accidentally pinned the tail on Raymond's father's clothes! We all burst out laughing!
When John took out his blindfold,
he was sheepish to see that he pinned the tail on Raymond's father! Raymond's father felt a
sharp point and said,"Ouch!"When he turn and noticed what John had done, he said,"Do I look like a donkey?" That made us laugh until tears rolled down our eyes!
When we finished the game, we are as hungry as a wolf. My mother prepared lots of food.There were pizza and fried rice.Then for desert, there is jelly and ice cream.We ate all the food that there was nothing left - not even a single crumb. After that, we cut the birthday cake and sang happy birthday to John.
It was a memorable birthday in my life.

# data[].attributes.body
Let's try to expand the moment by focusing on the picture below. Use your 5 senses to develop the moment.
1) Write only a paragraph of about 40-50 words.
2) Focus on the theme of "An unforgettable celebration."
3) Begin your paragraph with..
"Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game...."

# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the air as we blindfolded our friend, John. We were ready to start our game. "Today is my birthday!" I exclaimed. As it was my birthday I get to choose who to be the catcher. The first game we are playing is
blind-tag. John has to tap our arm without opening his eyes when he tap someone that person has to be the catcher.
"Quick! We have to hide!' whispered Jack, who is  John's twin brother. "What is this?" asked John. It is hard for John to find his way. " Got you!" said John. He took out the blindfold and said " Now Peter is it! You must count to 20, okay? " "Alright! 1! 2!.........20!" He put the blindfold on and putting his hands straight up to feel what is he touching.
Suddenly, he felt something very warm, it was Jack's father. Jack's father is very tall so Peter could not reach his arm so he touched his shirt instead he accidentally pull his shirt very hard. It made us laugh so much that we had a stomach ache " Oops! I accidentally pulled something too hard." He took out his blindfold and the first thing he saw was the hole in Jack's father shirt." you have a hole in your shirt!" exclaimed Peter." Who's the one who made the hole? Is it you who made the hole on your own shirt? Guys do you know who made the hole? "It was you who made the hole." said Joshua with a giggle. "Sorry, uncle it was an accident, can you forgive me?" Peter asked sadly. "Okay, I forgive you." said Jack's father. It was an unforgettable celebration.

(279 words)

# data[].attributes.body
Laughter filled the room as we blindfolded our friend John. We were ready to start our game. We started by playing the game we made up. It was called '''Find and Tap the Enemy''. We were about to start the game.
It was my birthday party so I got to decide who would be the catcher and who would be the enemy. I chose John as the catcher and the rest of us as the enemy. ''Okay everyone, on the count of three, we will start the game. Everyone ready?'' I asked.
''Ready!!'' Everyone yelled. ''Okay, one, two, three!'' I shouted. Everyone and I scurried to the back of the room. ''Try and catch us!!'' I yelled. John stumbled around, trying to find us. But no matter how hard he tried, he still could not catch us.
John did not give up and kept trying hard to find us. He accidentally tripped over a goodie bag that I had left on the ground. He fell onto the ground. ''Oh no! Are you okay, John?'' I shouted, while running over to him.
He sat up and said, ''Do not worry, I am okay!'' Then John stood up and swept away the dust on his shirt. ''I am sorry John, I left that goodie bag on the floor.'' I said. ''It is alright, I am not injured.'' said John. After that we continued the game. My birthday party was memorable after all.