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One of the most important transformative experiences in my life has been marriage. My husband and I met at a cinco de mayo party, and four months later we were married. Kind of crazy. But here we are, 10 years later, and we continue to learn from each other what Love really is. Coming from two different cultures and different faith backgrounds, it's been a transformative process together of talking out what our different beliefs, values, and expectations are and helping each other understand. There have definitely been difficult moments along the way, experiences that have forced us to communicate, to challenge one another, to listen compassionately to one another and overall that have tested our commitment to our marriage and deepened our friendship. We definitely have had to examine and talk about our expectations for marriage along the way, and have had to redefine what it means to us personally and what it means for our family. Coming from two different cultures, there are many things we've had to "unpack" and let go of, and other beliefs/practices that we've adopted together. It's been a transformative experience for both of us, and we are more connected, compassionate, forgiving, and loyal today than when we began this journey ten years ago. It hasn't been easy, but it's been worth it.

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I feel that this experiences with learning math touches on a number of Mezirow’s phases of transformative learning.  I used to hate math with my whole being.  Throughout grade school and high school, it was the one subject that I consistently did poorly in.  Even when I tried to understand it and reach out to teachers or tutors for help, they just couldn’t find a way to help me figure out the concepts.  When I decided to go back to college, I took the assessment test and was placed in the lowest math basically beginning with whole numbers. I have to admit that I was embarrassed being placed in this class which made me want to work hard to get out of those classes quickly.  That mentality worked but I was just getting by with a B.  When the classes began to move towards college algebra, I started falling back again and felt intimidated.  Luckily I had a great professor who knew exactly what my problem was.  I kept asking “why” to everything and it kept me from understanding formulas.  He told me “Remember when you were a kid and was scolded by your parents and you wanted to know why and they just said ‘because I said so!’ these formulas follow an order and that’s just it”.  I completely understood that analogy and it was like a light bulb went off in my head, suddenly every math problem began to make sense.   I use that same analogy now to help my kids with their math homework as well.

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I would say a major transformative experience for me was having children. They are in high school now and I am already looking back on our days together. Everyone told me it would go fast. I suppose I agree. I have a wonderful wife and she is a great mother. I have all the support I could ever wish for. But there is one thing that can never be truly appreciated until you have children of your own: That is:
"Making the decision to have a child -- it's momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body."
-- Elizabeth Stone
This has not always been very easy for me to deal with. I tend to worry! You know, it's not easy having your heart walking around outside of your body without being able to closely monitor.  This is something I discuss with my wife, close friends, and my mother, and I am slowly coming to the realization that I have no other choice than to let go and let them be who they are. I am very lucky they are great kids. I don't mean to be cliche or explain something that is not very unique, but this would have to be the biggest transformation I have ever experienced. I am sure there are others, and perhaps they are best told over a drink.

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Oh my goodness, Jared, I think we are twins! I was going to write about religion then I read your post and was like WOW! I am not alone! Ok, so similarly to Jared, I grew up in a religious household, which I may have mentioned previously somewhere. I was a really really good girl growing up. Never drank, never partied, got good grades, etc...I thought that was what was needed to be successful. However, as I came to college and was introduced to different people, religions, sexualities, ethnicities and cultures, I realized that I had been so narrow minded. I scoffed at people who asked me to smoke weed with them, looked strangely at gay couples, and wondered why women would want to cover up their hair with scarves! Over the years I grew more culturally aware through close friends who understood that I wasn't a bigot, but rather just uneducated on these things. I auditioned for a role in The Vagina Monologues my Sophmore year of college and got a part...6 year old girl, how fitting! A lot of the LGBTQ community was involved in the production, and we had the opportunity to hear them speak about their experiences with prejudice and it made me realize that these people are not "wrong" or "monsters" as my religious upbringing would make me realize, but rather just regular people. It broadened my perspectives and made me realize that we, as humans, need to be accepting of all people, regardless of their race, gender, ethnicity or sexuality. I wouldn't be the person I am today without that experience and am definitely grateful that I have a broader perspective of the world than I did when I was 18.

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One transformation that I went through is when I realized everyone is on their own path to success. When you are growing up, everyone is on the same path. Whether it is school, sports practice, birthday parties, everyone else is right there with you. But that changes the moment your name is written on a high school diploma. When I left home to become a "college boy", I dropped out after one week. If you asked me back then, I would have said, "I could do better", or something along those lines. But the truth is, I was not mentally prepared to leave home. I tried to enroll at a local community college, but it was too late for that semester. All my friends already began their educational journey, and I felt like I failed at life. Depression set in, and I remember regretting my decision to leave the college. But shortly after, I found a job as a tutor. Eventually I began taking classes, and transferred out. I graduated with a degree in two years and was hired three months after. Now I am here with all of you, representing various career stages. Throughout this entire process, I saw myself passing those whom I thought were ahead, and I also saw people go above and beyond my circumstances. All this to say, I truly understand that it is not about where you are, but where you are going.

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I think my most recent transformation in my thinking is the idea that "I'm ready and I know enough." Ever since I graduated college, I have been on this mission to learn as much as possible. I thought eventually I would be able to apply my experience to causes that I care about. Now that I am in the middle of my journey, I realize I'll really never know enough and I'll never be ready. Another way to write that is that I already know enough to do whatever new project I want to work on. I think for me the major shift that precipitated this transformation was becoming a father. I never felt ready to be a father and was on the philosophically on the fence of bringing another child into this world. Now that I'm a father of two, I feel differently. I know a big push when I became a father was to "finally" figure out a career a job. I decided to venture into direct instruction working as a 6th grade math and science teacher in South LA. I learned quickly that this role wasn't the right role for me. Also, I learned everything I needed in the 6 months that I taught. The teaching role definitely helped me become a better father. After teaching a roomful of children, I realized I could be a parent. It's funny how that works. I think back that this teaching job could be considered a stage. The stage that I'm currently at is a graduate student in this program. I think I still feel that I'm not ready, but I'm trying to believe that I am. Also, even if I am not ready, time is so precious and I have a sense of urgency. I'm pushing myself to create a company, write a book to produce a work instead of analyzing and waiting. Wish me luck!

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When reflecting about examples of transformative learning in my own life, I’ve come to realize I’m currently in the middle of this process on a very important topic today. Although there hasn’t been one single crisis event that has occurred for me, there have been a series of smaller events that have brought about my disorienting dilemma over the past few years about how I perceive the current realities of race in our society. Our current political climate, along with where I live (not just California, but Los Angeles specifically), the environment in which I work (Cal State LA, a university dedicated to inclusivity and celebrating diversity), and friends and colleagues of mine that are highly knowledgeable and educated on this topic representing many sides of the conversation, have precipitated this shift in my thinking over the past year or so. I have found myself working through some of the steps Mezirow outlined, specifically step 2: self-examination with feelings of guilt or shame (if any of you listen to Macklemore and Ryan Lewis, there is a line in their song “A Wake” that says “Don’t get involved if the cause isn’t mine? White privilege, white guilt at the same damn time.” This pretty much sums up my feelings regarding my reflection and introspection on this topic). Beyond this, I’m still in the early stages of transformative learning, reflecting on my own beliefs, reviewing and assessing new information from those around me with greater knowledge and experience on this topic, and identifying and recognizing the individuals and communities that may share the new beliefs I am growing into. This type of transformative learning definitely does not happen overnight and can be quite uncomfortable at times, but I’m really excited to continue through the process as I can feel the significant paradigm shift that is currently taking place for me. :)

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When I was in high school, I did not care about my grades or school at all. I was happy when I got a D letter grade since I knew it meant not retaking the class. After I graduated from high school, I saw my family continuing their education and getting jobs that paid well.  Observing how my family had a good life encouraged me to start community college to see if I liked it. After doing three years of community college, I transferred to CSUDH and received my B.A. in Business. Now, I am a student at CSUF earning my masters. I never thought I would be in this position. I am so excited about my future.

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When I started working with my department I had graduated with my BA two years prior. I hadn't thought about continuing my education until I started working where I currently am. I started noticing that the people in my work environment had their Master's degree, PhD, or EdD or working toward it. It was quite encouraging and I realized that while I love my current job, my goal is to eventually work my way up and in order to do that I need to further my education. I have met so many wonderful people that really inspired me, specifically my boss. She has two masters degree's and is currently working on her PhD and she is the reason I am in this graduate program and I thank her all the time for giving me that push! I am definitely in a different mind set now than I was a few years ago where I thought I was not cut out for grad school. I feel so much more positive about myself.

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Hello everyone, I apologize if this is a bit of a touchy subject, but I think it is one of the biggest transformative experiences that I've had in my life. I grew up in a religious family so when I was younger I was also religious. As I  grew into my teens, in the back of my head I started to doubt my own faith in my religion. I can remember going through most of (if not all of) these ten steps, I was definitely disoriented at first, I couldn't even completely understand that I was doubtful at first. Once I realized that I didn't completely belief the teachings of the religion I was brought up under, I felt a lot of shame, thinking that I was a bad person. After some time, I decided to seek out information on my own, and I started researching my own religion as well as other religions. In college, I took a comparative religion class to see if there was something I was missing from a a different worldview. Eventually I came to realize that I was essentially agnostic, I had to realize that I was going through the motions in my family's religion just to make others happy. I've been open to the idea of religion, but I did not truly believe the religion that I was brought up under. I found that I became a much happier person when I accepted my own point of view and stopped trying to suppress it from myself and the others around me.

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Being a parent, I was always trying to force my children to play the piano using every excuse such as it is great for math skills, great to be musically inclined, etc. I realized that I REALLY want to learn to play the piano. Once I realized this, I stopped forcing my kids to take lessons and I enrolled in a community college class with a commitment to learn to play the piano. The instructor was supportive and created the "sacred space" to learn to play without judgement. It is a safe space where I am able to learn at my own pace and not to compare myself with someone else in the class. It has been 2 years and I am still taking lessons with this amazing instructor who reinforces that we have our whole life to practice and love the art of playing the piano. Like the old saying goes, "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear."