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Trust Vs. Mistrust is the first stage of development proposed by Erik Erikson. This stage is described as if the needs are dependably met, infants develop a sense of basic trust. This stage also takes place from infancy to 1 year (Myers, 2011). When I was born my sister was almost 7 and at this point in her life she was obsessed with American girl dolls. What was better than an American girl doll to her… Me! My sister always insisted on changing my diapers/clothes, feeding me, and everything else in between. My sister met my emotional and physical needs alongside my parents which allowed me to trust early on in my development.

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I truly was a real life baby doll to her.

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Object permanence is the awareness that objects continue to exist even when they are not perceived. Babies lack this ability during the sensorimotor stage from birth to approximately age two (Myers, 2011). My mother tells me all the time that as a baby I was severely attached to pacifiers, also known as my binkies. My mom would take my binkies out of my sight to see how I would react and as anyone could guess, I would cry. When my binkies were not in sight I would think they were gone forever but really they were not.

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A picture of me swimming with my binkie!

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Authoritative parents lay out strong rules for their children, while also leaving room for questioning and communication between child and parent. They explain the reasoning behind their rules and often yield very self-reliant and social children (Myers, 2011). Growing up my mom always had rules and expectations for my siblings and I. I believe having this parenting style helped build trust and communication in my relationship with my mom. It has also made me more social, kind, and respectful as a person.

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Autonomy vs shame and doubt is the second stage of development proposed by Erik Erikson. This stage occurs within toddlers ages 1-3 where they learn to exercise their will and do things for themselves, or they doubt their abilities (Myers, 2011). Growing up I would refuse to let my mom dress me because I wanted to be a “big girl”, especially like my older sister. Trying to dress myself by myself was very important because I was making my own decisions which helped me gain a little bit of independence. When I was not able to pick out my own clothes I felt inferior.

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Initiative vs guilt is a stage of development proposed by Erik Erikson. At this stage children assert themselves more frequently through directing play and social interaction. At this stage in my life I took initiative by starting to socialize with other children and exploring the world more. Throughout preschool to first grade my teachers would always tell my mom how much of a social butterfly I was in school.

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I was bubbly and outgoing since day one!

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The social learning theory is all about how we as humans learn social expectations from others’ behavior (Meyers, 2011). Growing up my sister was a huge influence on my decision making and actions because I looked up to her. Although there is a seven year age gap between us, I would still want to act and look like her when it came to clothes, hobbies, and more. Everything she did I adored, for example I would want to wear certain articles of clothing because she did, I would want to style my hair the way that she did, and talk the way that she did.

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Picture of me holding a bottle of nail polish.

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Gender role is a set of expected behaviors for males or for females (Meyers, 2011). Growing up with two brothers closer in age to me than my sister I would play with my brothers a lot more. Although I did not stray away from dresses, painting my nails, and “girly” colors, I would have preferred to  play catch and wrestle with my brothers than play dolls and other girly activities. My brothers would sometimes tease me and tell me that these games that I also enjoyed were for boys and that I could not play with them because I was a girl.

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Children learn the pleasure of applying themselves to tasks, or they feel inferior (Myers, 2011). During elementary school I was very fond of trying new things because of the sense of pride and accomplishment I would feel. Therefore in fourth and fifth grade I decided to learn to play the violin. Performing my new hobby to people inside and outside of school gave me confidence in my abilities and made me feel great about myself.

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Peer-influence plays a big role in the social and emotional development of children. “We seek to fit in with our groups and are influenced by them” (Myers, 2011) In middle school all my closest friends except for me did cheerleading. Since it was a common topic of conversation, I decided to do it myself to gain a sense of acceptance and value by my friends. Although I fell in love with cheerleading, I did it to fit in with the people around me.

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Identity vs role confusion is one of Erikon’s stages of development that occurs through adolescence. Teenagers discover who they are and how they fit in. They start to form a stronger social identity and their main issue is finding themselves (Meyers, 2011). I have been on Ludlowe Cheerleading since my freshman year and it is definitely a space I fit into. I feel as though this team and sport has helped me develop a good sense of personal identity, especially in the leadership role that I am in now as a captain.

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Social identity is the portion of our self-concept that is determined by the groups we are a part of (Meyers, 2011). I believe that who you choose to surround yourself with, has a huge impact on your social identity. It is important to be surrounded by positivity and people who want nothing but the best for yourself. My friends make me want to be a better person everyday and because of them they have helped develop my social identity.

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Emerging adulthood, the period from late teens to mid-twenties when individuals make the transition from adolescence to the independence of adulthood (Meyers, 2011). This past spring I experienced this transition when I got my first real job at Organika Kitchen in Southport, Connecticut. Having a job at this age has developed my sense of responsibility, good work habits, management skills, and more.