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REPETITION: 'and so we are washed.'
Burns repeats this line to tie us to the image of the Laundromat, but to also remind us that one of the roles of religion is to 'cleanse' us, to wash us of our sins. The statement is so simple, that we take it for granted that we are simply washed- passively.
The word 'washed' implies that something else  works on us to achieve this purity, rather than ourselves.

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Alike all Christians, the Twelve Apostles only follow the path of Jesus Christ
--> left in the background
- "(not forgetting Thomas)"
--> again, satirical of Christianity
- "to eleven or twelve"
--> were there eleven, or twelve apostles?

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1. Jesus called all kinds of people to be disciples
a. We have seen Peter, James, John, Philip, Nathanael, Matthew, Thomas

b. All were TOTALLY different
2. Now we are going to look at THREE apostles - Kind of forgotten
c. But Jesus had a PURPOSE for EACH of them

a. James, the son of Alphaeus
3. These three are like the vast majority of Christians
b. Simon the Zealot

c. And Thaddaeus, aka Judas, son of James and Lebbaeus

a. They live, they work, they are faithful, they die

b. All without little or no RECOGNITION

c. They NEVER get their names in the church bulletin

d. They NEVER teach a Bible class
JAMES, SON OF ALPHAEUS 1. This is NOT James, the son of Zebedee and John's brother
e. They NEVER get in the spotlight in ANY way

f. They SIMPLY follow Jesus in the BACKGROUND

g. They SIMPLY do what Jesus calls them to do

a. All we know about THIS James is his FIRST name

b. His father's name

c. And that he was one of the original TWELVE

d. His name is mentioned only FOUR times
2. We know less about James, the son of Alphaeus than any of the OTHER eleven
Matthew 10:2-4 Now the names of the twelve apostles are these; The first, Simon, who is called Peter, and Andrew his brother; James the son of Zebedee, and John his brother;
3 Philip, and Bartholomew; Thomas, and Matthew the publican; James the son of Alphaeus, and Lebbaeus, whose surname was Thaddaeus; 4 Simon the Canaanite, and Judas Iscariot, who also betrayed him.

Mark 3:16-19 And Simon he surnamed Peter; 17 And James the son of Zebedee, and John the brother of James; and he surnamed them Boanerges, which is, The sons of thunder:
18 And Andrew, and Philip, and Bartholomew, and Matthew, and Thomas, and James the son of Alphaeus, and Thaddaeus, and Simon the Canaanite, 19 And Judas Iscariot, which also betrayed him: and they went into an house.

Luke 6:13-16 13 And when it was day, he called unto him his disciples: and of them he chose twelve, whom also he named apostles; 14 Simon, (whom he also named Peter,) and Andrew his brother, James and John, Philip and Bartholomew, 15 Matthew and Thomas, James the son of Alphaeus, and Simon called Zelotes, 16 And Judas the brother of James, and Judas Iscariot, which also was the traitor.

Acts 1:13 And when they were come in, they went up into an upper room, where abode both Peter, and James, and John, and Andrew, Philip, and Thomas, Bartholomew, and Matthew, James the son of Alphaeus, and Simon Zelotes, and Judas the brother of James.

e. In EACH list James, the son of Alphaeus is mentioned in the NINTH position
3. James may also be the person called James the less
f. NOTHING is recorded in the Bible of ANYTHING James said or did

a. Some believe he could be the brother of another disciple whose father had the SAME name

Mark 2:14 And as he passed by, he saw Levi the son of Alphaeus sitting at the receipt of custom, and said unto him, Follow me. And he arose and followed him.
4. Tradition says James, the son of Alphaeus was stoned to death by the Jews for preaching Christ and was buried in Jerusalem
b. IF this James is the brother of Matthew, he may have become a follower of Jesus when he saw the TREMENDOUS change in his brother

c. BUT we will not know for sure if they were brothers until we get to HEAVEN

Mark 15:40 There were also women looking on afar off: among whom was Mary Magdalene, and Mary the mother of James the less and of Joses, and Salome;

a. This James' mother was among the women at Jesus' crucifixion and tomb

Matthew 27:56 Among which was Mary Magdalene, and Mary the mother of James and Joses, and the mother of Zebedee's children.

b. But this is really stretching the point, because James is not called by this name in any of the lists of the disciples

a. James NEVER saw His name on a marquee

b. James NEVER saw His name in print

c. BUT James was FAITHFUL to the Lord puts his name in a much more IMPORTANT place

Revelation 21:14 And the wall of the city had twelve foundations, and in them the names of the twelve apostles of the Lamb.
JUDAS, THE BROTHER OF JAMES
d. His name will be just as GREAT as Peter or John
1. JUDAS not a name one would want today
e. James represents people like you and me

f. Quiet believers serving the Lord behind the scenes

g. And yes, often go unrecognized and unappreciated

h. BUT

Matthew 6:4 4 That thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret himself shall reward thee openly.

i. The Lesson from James the Son of Alphaeus is that all faithful believers will be REWARDED
2. Once, Judas, brother of James, was called Lebbaeus
Luke 6:16 And Judas the brother of James, and Judas Iscariot, which also was the traitor.

Acts 1:13 And when they were come in, they went up into an upper room, where abode both Peter, and James, and John, and Andrew, Philip, and Thomas, Bartholomew, and Matthew, James the son of Alphaeus, and Simon Zelotes, and Judas the brother of James.
3. There is only ONE recording of the words of Thaddaeus
a. YET it is a GOOD name

b. It is the Greek form of the Hebrew name 'Judah'

c. One of Jesus' four half=brothers was named JUDAS,

Matthew 13:55 Is not this the carpenter's son? is not his mother called Mary? and his brethren, James, and Joses, and Simon, and Judas?
4. In the Upper Room, Jesus tells His disciples He is leaving them for a while and is going to Heaven
d. Then there was Judas the son of James

John 14:22 Judas saith unto him, not Iscariot, Lord, how is it that thou wilt manifest thyself unto us, and not unto the world?

i. Iscariot separated him for that Judas

Matthew 10:3 Philip, and Bartholomew; Thomas, and Matthew the publican; James the son of Alphaeus, and Lebbaeus, whose surname was Thaddaeus;

a. Some of the older Greek manuscripts simply call him THADDAEUS

a. Was the night before the crucifixion

b. Jesus tells His disciples that those who OBEY His commands are the ONES who LOVE Him and that He will REVEAL Himself to each of them

John 14:21 He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: and he that loveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will manifest myself to him.

c. Then Thaddaeus asks:

John 14:22 Judas saith unto him, not Iscariot, Lord, how is it that thou wilt manifest thyself unto us, and not unto the world?

a. He gets so many DIFFERENT responses

b. Pessimistic Thomas

John 14:5 Thomas saith unto him, Lord, we know not whither thou goest; and how can we know the way?
5. That is ALL we know about Thaddaeus
c. Skeptical Philip

John 14:8 Philip saith unto him, Lord, shew us the Father, and it sufficeth us.

d. Then there is Thaddaeus

i. He wants to know ONLY one thing

ii. WHY was Jesus going to reveal Himself ONLY to them, and NOT to the world?
SIMON ZELOTES, also called SIMON THE CANAANITE
iii. To which Jesus replies
1. There are TWO Simons
John 14:23 Jesus answered and said unto him, If a man love me, he will keep my words: and my Father will love him, and we will come unto him, and make our abode with him.

iv. Jesus would REVEAL Himself to ANYONE ready to receive Him
2. Names Zelotes or Canaanite tells us a lot about this Simon
v. AND would come and live IN them in the person of the Holy Spirit

e. Thaddaeus wants the world to come to Jesus as Savior

i. Many of the OTHER disciples showed nothing but SELFISHNESS up to this point
3. The Zealots tried to overthrow Roman rule through assassinations and terrorism
a. He was QUIET, UNSELFISH, EVANGELISTIC

b. Tradition says he preached in what is today Turkey

c. There he died a martyr's death

d. Thaddaeus was a soul winner

e. He was concerned with winning OTHERS

f. Good priority for us

Matthew 10:4 Simon the Canaanite, and Judas Iscariot, who also betrayed him.

Mark 3:18 And Andrew, and Philip, and Bartholomew, and Matthew, and Thomas, and James the son of Alphaeus, and Thaddaeus, and Simon the Canaanite,
4. How amazing that Jesus chose BOTH Matthew and Simon Zelotes as disciples
a. Simon Peter

b. This one is Simon Zelotes

i. Zelotes means devoted, zealous support

a. Zelotes were a political party fanatically opposed to Roman rule of Palestine
5. Jesus took the political commitment and zeal of Simon and transformed it into a commitment and zeal for the Gospel
b. They were passionate patriots of Judaism

c. The believed Israel was the Holy Land and should not be dominated by any foreign Gentile power
CONCLUSION 1. Three forgotten disciples
d. He was a partisan for Jewish independence

a. They were famous for carrying curved daggers
2. All three show us that God can and will use anyone
i. Used to assassinate anyone

ii. Even their OWN people who conspired with or supported the Romans

b. It was the Zealots who took control of Jerusalem in AD 66

i. This action brought Titus and his Roman army to destroy and burn the city

c. Their last stronghold was Masada, a mountain fortress that fell to Rome in AD 73

d. Just image how HARD it was for Simon when he heard these words of Jesus:

Matthew 5:44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;

a. Matthew COLLECTED taxes to support Rome

b. Simon would not given a second thought to murdering a Jew who collaborated with Rome

c. Had they met under DIFFERENT circumstances, Simon would have gladly stuck a dagger in Matthew

d. Image Simons thoughts when he heard Jesus say:

John 13:34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.

a. There is no consistent record of HOW Simon died

b. But certainly he died preaching the Gospel

c. With Simon we learn that Jesus can take away our PREJUDICE, our HATE

a. James, the son of Alphaeus

b. Thaddaeus

c. Simon Zelotes

a. IF there is a WILLING hear

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INTRODUCTION 1. Jesus called all kinds of people to be disciples a. We have seen Peter, James, John, Philip, Nathanael, Matthew, Thomas b. All were TOTALLY different c. But Jesus had a PURPOSE for EACH of them 2. Now we are going to look at THREE apostles - Kind of forgotten a.

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"coin-op" suggests that religion is only available for people once they pay (coin operated religion), can only have sins washed if its paid for

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Saint Peter's attribute - Keys of Heaven - given to him by Christ
"here's the key, Pete"

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The laundromat perhaps has a greater promise of return
--> the coin is given to directly wash clothes
--> the Bible aims to influence individuals with "tantalising tales", and allows them to believe but not guarantee return

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"flaming them at the Pentecost-Hilton with the hard sell heat" referring to converting people to christianity

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"water into wine
(into vodka too?)"
--> satirical
"of loaves, fishes
(and what of crab, of lobster?)"
--> if Jesus/God can make food out of nowhere to feed people, why not something better?, why not be given luxury?, suggesting you don't get what you pay for, you are only given the bare minimum

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"don't you feel pre-shrunk?"
Pre-shrunk, can't shrink any more, therefore: washing doesn't do anything?

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"tantalising tales"
--> a direct insult to those who believe in religion

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"We [are] washed
[from our] silly sins
[by] tantalising tales
[of] water [into] wine"
Lots of alliteration/assonance in the first four lines.

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'With the hard sell heat'
'blaze the trail boys'
- apostles pushing the sales of the religion, drawing everyone in

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"(not forgetting Thomas)"
Why is Thomas mentioned specifically?
"here's the key, Pete"
And why Peter specifically, and what key?

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The comparison of the actions taken by the twelve apostles, to spread the word of Christ, to 'pulls' in 'coins' (alike a business)
--> such coins could perhaps be used to operate laundry machines
--> to wash away the sins of the apostles:
- "Bibleromat, coin-op"
- "the first twelve salesmen"
- "so we are washed"

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Criticism of religion:
"into vodka, too?" "and what of crab, of lobster?" - if you could make it into food, then why not into better food?
And the comparison to business
Also "tantalising tales" - not taken seriously

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Bibleromat - bible + laundromat?

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"red tongues of fierce fire"
"flaming them ... with the hard sell heat"
"blaze the trail"

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"exposing his packaged deal. Eternity guaranteed" - referring to heaven
- comparing religion to a laundromat business, bringing people in 'washing' them of their sins
-"flaming them at the Pentecost-Hilton"
"air into red tongues of fierce fire licks"
Pentecost comes from a Jewish harvest festival called Shavuot. The apostles were celebrating this festival when the Holy Spirit descended on them. It sounded like a very strong wind, and it looked like tongues of fire. The apostles then found themselves speaking in foreign languages, inspired by the Holy Spirit. People passing by at first thought that they must be drunk, but the apostle Peter told the crowd that the apostles were full of the Holy Spirit.

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Pentecost
Find the date for Pentecost 2014 in the multifaith calendar
What is Pentecost?

Pentecost is the festival when Christians celebrate the gift of the Holy Spirit. It is celebrated on the Sunday 50 days after Easter (the name comes from the Greek pentekoste, "fiftieth").

It is also called Whitsun, but does not necessarily coincide with the Whitsun Bank Holiday in the UK.

Pentecost is regarded as the birthday of the Christian church, and the start of the church's mission to the world.

The Holy Spirit

The Holy Spirit is the third part of the Trinity of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit that is the way Christians understand God.

Celebrating Pentecost

Pentecost is a happy festival. Ministers in church often wear robes with red in the design as a symbol of the flames in which the Holy Spirit came to earth.

Hymns sung at Pentecost take the Holy Spirit as their theme, and include:

Come down O Love Divine

Come Holy Ghost our souls inspire

Breathe on me breath of God

O Breath of Life, come sweeping through us

There's a spirit in the air

Spirit of the Living God, fall afresh on me

Pentecost Symbols

The symbols of Pentecost are those of the Holy Spirit and include flames, wind, the breath of God and a dove.

The first Pentecost

Pentecost comes from a Jewish harvest festival called Shavuot.

The apostles were celebrating this festival when the Holy Spirit descended on them.

It sounded like a very strong wind, and it looked like tongues of fire.

The apostles then found themselves speaking in foreign languages, inspired by the Holy Spirit.

People passing by at first thought that they must be drunk, but the apostle Peter told the crowd that the apostles were full of the Holy Spirit.

Pentecostal Christianity

Pentecost is a special day for any Christian, but it is emphasised particularly by Pentecostal churches. Pentecostal Christians believe in the direct experience of the Holy Spirit by believers during all of their services.

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Find the date for Pentecost 2014 in the multifaith calendar Pentecost is the festival when Christians celebrate the gift of the Holy Spirit. It is celebrated on the Sunday 50 days after Easter (the name comes from the Greek pentekoste, "fiftieth"). It is also called Whitsun, but does not necessarily coincide with the Whitsun Bank Holiday in the UK.

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"pre-shrunk" - so many sins that being 'washed' from them causes 'us' to shrink?

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God + Bible figures likened to heads of large corporate companies. Religion is compared to a business.

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religious?
- 'silly sins'
- 'wine' - blood
- 'loaves and fishes' - what Jesus gave to his people
- 12 sales man - 12 apostles..
- Thomas- one of the first apostles.
- holy ghost - reference to god/ Jesus - holy ghost is the third member
- Pete - saint peter, member of twelve apostles.
- Pentecost - google says it is celebrated 7th sunday after Easter
- Easter- Jesus rose

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"washed from our ... sins"
"water into wine"
"loaves, fishes"
Religious allusion?

Also:
"eternity guaranteed"