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School Counselors Reflective On What Makes Them Effective

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School Counselors Reflective On What Makes Them Effective

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Are you a school counselor or thinking of becoming one? What are the most important attributes an effective school counselor should have? This week, in honor of National School Counseling Week (February 7 though 11), Education World asked school counselors to reflect on what makes them effective. We are pleased to share their thoughtful and illuminating -- and often heartwarming -- responses.
National School Counseling Week -- February 7 through 11 -- is a time to celebrate the unique contributions that school counselors make to their school communities. The week also affords school counselors an opportunity to feature their on-going efforts and to highlight their visions for their schools. As school counselors take stock of their visions and accomplishments this week, Education World wondered

What attributes do effective school counselors have?

To learn the answer to that question, we enlisted the help of Barbara Muller-Ackerman, chairwoman of the American School Counselor Association's (ASCA) public relations committee. She asked leaders in the counseling field to share their thoughts with Education World. The answers were as diverse as the counselors themselves, but one common theme came through -- counselors care deeply about their work and the students and schools they serve.

FIRST AND FOREMOST

Most elementary school teachers know Margaret Wise Brown's The Important Book. Teachers recognize the book as a great tool for honing students' observation skills. When one teacher at Kreeger Elementary School in Fowlerville, Michigan, recently challenged kids to create their own Important Books, one student wrote a page dedicated to her school counselor. Counselor Judy Standley shared with Education World the heart-tugging sentiment that the student wrote:

"The important thing about our counselor is that she listens. I do know that lots of other people listen, but she listens the most. She does B.A.B.E.S. and lots of other things. She tells stories with important morals. She listens to you and tells no one. She is an important counselor. But the important thing about Mrs. Standley is that SHE LISTENS!!"

In the Important Book attributes of school counselors, listening ability is right there at the top of the list! It was the most common -- and perhaps least surprising -- response we received. The insight that counselors shared about that choice tells us even more!

Last year, Shaftsburg (Michigan) Elementary School counselor Teresa Severy met a new fourth grader for the first time. The bright and resilient little girl's life had been colored by the horrors of neglect, substance abuse, and family incarcerations. "I met her as I do all my new students, and she shared much of what was in her heart," said Severy. Then, one morning, Severy found on her desk a box -- clearly wrapped by a young person -- and a card, addressed in the beautiful awkward cursive of a child.

"The box contained a wind chime for my office, to add special music to my day," Severy related. "The card touched my heart. It read

Thank you for being a special person who really cares to listen and hear me. I wish you a very happy Mother's Day. Your friend...

"I wept when I read her words. Her mom was incarcerated, and [the child] was living with another family. One never knows that what we say or do can be significant in the life of a child."

The gift and the note were reminders of the importance of listening, of the importance of being "on top of my game when I work with children," Severy told Education World.

Larry Steele thinks often about the importance of listening too. "Many times, I get only one chance to work with a situation, crisis, student, or family," said Steele, Southern California area director for the California School Counselors Association. "I need to be right on the button the first time out of the gate, so listening skills are essential."

"Our children might not always say out loud what they are feeling, and school counselors need the ability to listen -- to words, body language, unspoken words, and attitudes," added Carol Turner. She is a counselor at Center Street Middle School in Birmingham, Alabama. "School counselors can effectively help students by really listening to them whether they are talking or not."

LISTENING'S CLOSE COMPANION

Listening and empathy go hand in hand as the two most frequent responses to the question we posed to school counselors. "The ability to experience as one's own the feelings of others" is key, said Deborah Bilzing, a school counseling consultant in Wisconsin.

"The ability to understand why others do what they do and think the way they do takes precedence over all other characteristics," agreed Robert B. Cormany, executive director of the Pennsylvania School Counselor Association. "Unless one has that quality of understanding, skill in technique is useless and knowledge is less than meaningless."

Helen A. Hatridge, past president of the Missouri School Counselor Association, goes along with that. "Without the ability to understand what the student is experiencing, a counselor cannot truly do an effective job. Empathy leads to good listening and a better ability to help the client come up with solutions. It also helps the student feel more comfortable and willing to open up to a counselor."

RELATIONSHIP BUILDING IS KEY

Key to the success of any school counselor is the person's ability to build trusting relationships with students and other members of the school community. That should be a prerequisite for anyone who is going to serve as a student advocate, said Beckie Meyer, an assistant professor in the school counseling department at Millersville (Pennsylvania) University.

Meyer reflected recently for Education World on her 23 years as a teacher and an elementary school counselor. "Student referrals to the counselor have greatly increased from teachers, parents, and the students themselves in recent years," said Meyer. "A counselor simply must be approachable, inviting, trustworthy and, yes, just plain fun at times. Students must want to seek out that person when in need."

"Most counseling cannot begin until that initial 'ice' is broken," concluded Meyer. "Once people feel trust, comfort, and acceptance, the possibilities for getting the work of counseling done are greatly enhanced."

"Our students need to sense that they have professional caregivers among the adults that they can turn to [and that the counselor] will be there for them in non-judgmental fashion," added Julie A. Kruk. She is a counselor at Bay Port High School in Green Bay, Wisconsin. "This accepting nature is enmeshed in our reputation, which builds student by student and is shared by word of mouth and experiences with others. Students can tell if we are warm and inviting and whether or not they can entrust us with their stories. I feel that this trait is the singular skill that counselors need to build their practice around. We can then do the good work that we have been trained to deliver."

Andrea Meyer, a counselor at Milbank (South Dakota) Middle School and no relation to Beckie Meyer, agreed. "You have to be able to develop rapport and you must be genuine! You have to understand the kid culture -- not try to be a part of it but know what the students are interested in, what's important to them. If you don't have a caring relationship of trust and understanding, nothing else is going to happen with children or adults. The old saw -- Kids don't care how much you know until they know how much you care -- still rings true today!"

COUNSELORS MAKE A DIFFERENCE

When Kim Haloway thought about our question, many characteristics raced through her mind -- empathy, honesty, ethics, sensitivity, accountability. "But if I don't think I will really make a difference -- if I don't believe in myself and in the student's ability to succeed, to overcome all odds -- then all those qualities are diminished."

The belief that we can make a difference has got to be the most important attribute of an effective school counselor, concluded Haloway, a counselor in the Marana (Arizona) Unified School District.

Jackie M. Allen, a counselor at Blacow Elementary School in Fremont, California, and past-president the ASCA, came to the same conclusion. "Commitment to the belief that counseling makes a difference in student lives and futures must be a foundational belief held sacred by that counselor -- a belief that will guide his or her relationships, responses, actions, program development, and counseling practice. Without that commitment to the process of change, a school counselor will not be able to effectively serve as a catalyst in student lives and a significant change agent in the educational community."

FLEXIBILITY IS KEY

Flexibility is another key to success in the school-counseling field. "Time is not yours" in counseling, Rich Downs, a school counseling consultant for the Florida Department of Education, told Education World. "When your expertise is needed to deal with a problem, you must make yourself available to assist others. Although your daily schedule has just been [interrupted] by someone else's need, you must be supportive and place your needs and concerns second. An effective school counselor must make the individuals of our attention believe that, at that particular point in time, they are the most important person in the world."

"You just never know what is going to come up next," agreed Linda Lueckenhoff, a counselor at Palmyra (Missouri) Elementary School and president-elect of the Missouri School Counselor Association. "You might finish presenting a classroom lesson on friendship, and on the way back to your office, the school secretary gives you a message to return a call from a concerned parent. But before you have a chance to pick up the phone, the school nurse steps in to discuss concerns about a student who might have been physically abused. While you are talking with the nurse, the superintendent calls to invite you to a meeting on developing a district crisis response plan...."

"A rigid person just couldn't survive very well in this type of setting!" added Lueckenhoff. "You must be able to switch gears and think fast."

KNOW YOURSELF -- AND TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF!

Each semester, Zark VanZandt gives students in his School Counseling and Services class at the University of Southern Maine an assignment he calls Beyond Mediocrity. "In that assignment, I ask students to create a personal mission statement in which they identify the ten most significant competencies they must possess to be an effective school counselor and how they personally plan to stay committed to professional excellence," he told Education World.

Students' responses to the assignment often impress VanZandt, and this semester was no exception. One response that stands out came from a student whose number one competency was

To possess self-knowledge: This is a crucial competency that includes a deep understanding of my own paradigms, my biases, my strengths and weaknesses, and my theoretical perspective on counseling. For me to create a career that is beyond mediocrity, I must first look inward. The vision that will lead me to effectiveness, my mission statement, is both personal and professional. It would feel false to separate the two, for I don't change my inner being depending on the circumstance.

"You cannot be an effective counselor if you are not physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually healthy," added Crystal Asche, a counselor at Wahpeton (North Dakota) Middle School. "Many times we are so busy taking care of others that we forget about taking care of ourselves. We then not only fail ourselves but [also lack] the energy to take care of our clients."

"I think that the most important characteristic for me is balance -- balance between professional and personal life, between giving and renewing, between helping and empowering." Tom Wiggins, president of the New York School Counselor Association, told Education World. "I have seen too many school counselors lose their effectiveness because they have lost their balance. They may still be effective at creating relationships, but they lose some of their effective edge either because they can't say no when they need to or because their own unattended-to needs surface. I regularly attend to my own needs so that I feel balanced between giving and receiving."

MORE COUNSELOR COMMENTSMORE COUNSELOR TRAITS

Good listening skills. Empathy. The ability to build strong relationships. Flexibility. Self-knowledge. A strong belief in the ability to make a difference. Those are some of the attributes of an effective school counselor. There are many others. School counselors shared with Education World some of the other characteristics that a good school counselor might possess. Following are four more:

On Laughter and Humor
With all of the tragic issues our youth must deal with, it is important for them to have someone they can turn to who will support them and also help them to find ways in which to laugh. The healing power of laughter and humor (not malicious) helps to give hope and healing. Humor also assists in building resiliency in children.

Julie Dillehay, school counselor
Crossroads Middle School
Meridian, Idaho

On the Ability to Advocate
The school counselor needs to be able to advocate on behalf of the students and the counseling program. The counselor also needs to be able to teach others to advocate for themselves and for those who cannot advocate for themselves.

Jo Hayslip, professor emerita
Plymouth (New Hampshire) State College

On Humility
The best help we can give is to be a person who knows that we have our own personal issues to address, works on them as best we can, and makes it possible for others to work on theirs too. As a school counselor, I am a fellow traveler who has the awesome privilege to walk with someone else on his or her journey. My job is to be a role model for someone who does not have all the answers but who is not afraid to look in the very dark places to find them.

Suzan Nolan, elementary counselor
Rapid City (South Dakota) School System

On Smiling
After 30 years of counseling, I think the most important attribute is a consistent, every day smile. I notice how students respond to my smile. Although many might not think of it as a skill in the traditional sense, it is very important.

Ned W. Toms
Tri Village Local School District
New Madison, Ohio

LAST BUT NOT LEAST

Finally, we asked ASCA president Janice Gallagher to respond to our question, and she did.

"I believe a school counselor must be able to see and understand the multifaceted potential of children. Counseling children is like working with an array of different gems and stones. Some are perfect as they are. Others need a little polish to shine, and still others need to be examined for preparation before they are shaped to be most beautiful and functional. One may be most lovely alone, another may be best as part of a small grouping or arrangement, and others need to be surrounded by a crowd. Each is different, each is beautiful in its own right and, most important, each has value."

Article by Gary Hopkins
Education WorldÂ® Editor-in-Chief
Copyright Â© 2005 Education World

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The more that you, as a leader, manage each of these areas, the higher your emotional intelligence. So, let's look at each element in more detail and examine how you can grow as a leader.

Emotional Intelligence in Leadership

1. Self-awareness

If you're self-aware, you always know how you feel, and you know how your emotions and your actions can affect the people around you. Being self-aware when you're in a leadership position also means having a clear picture of your strengths and weaknesses, and it means behaving with humility.

So, what can you do to improve your self-awareness?

Keep a journal. Journals help you improve your self-awareness. If you spend just a few minutes each day writing down your thoughts, this can move you to a higher degree of self-awareness.

2. Self-regulation

Leaders who regulate themselves effectively rarely verbally attack others, make rushed or emotional decisions, stereotype people, or compromise their values. Self-regulation is all about staying in control.

This element of emotional intelligence, according to Goleman, also covers a leader's flexibility and commitment to personal accountability.

So, how can you improve your ability to self-regulate?

Hold yourself accountable. If you tend to blame others when something goes wrong, stop. Make a commitment to admit to your mistakes and to face the consequences, whatever they are. You'll probably sleep better at night, and you'll quickly earn the respect of those around you.

Practice being calm. The next time you're in a challenging situation, be very aware of how you act. Do you relieve your stress by shouting at someone else? Practice deep-breathing exercises to calm yourself. Also, try to write down all of the negative things you want to say, and then rip it up and throw it away. Expressing these emotions on paper (and not showing them to anyone!) is better than speaking them aloud to your team. What's more, this helps you challenge your reactions to ensure that they're fair!

3. Motivation

Self-motivated leaders work consistently toward their goals, and they have extremely high standards for the quality of their work.

How can you improve your motivation?

Re-examine why you're doing your job. It's easy to forget what you really love about your career. So, take some time to remember why you wanted this job. If you're unhappy in your role and you're struggling to remember why you wanted it, try the Five Whys technique to find the root of the problem. Starting at the root often helps you look at your situation in a new way. And make sure that your goal statements are fresh and energizing. For more on this, see our article on Goal Setting.

4. Empathy

For leaders, having empathy is critical to managing a successful team or organization. Leaders with empathy have the ability to put themselves in someone else's situation. They help develop the people on their team, challenge others who are acting unfairly, give constructive feedback, and listen to those who need it.

If you want to earn the respect and loyalty of your team, then show them you care by being empathic.

How can you improve your empathy?

Respond to feelings. You ask your assistant to work late - again. And although he agrees, you can hear the disappointment in his voice. So, respond by addressing his feelings. Tell him you appreciate how willing he is to work extra hours, and that you're just as frustrated about working late. If possible, figure out a way for future late nights to be less of an issue (for example, give him Monday mornings off).

5. Social Skills

Leaders who do well in the social skills element of emotional intelligence are great communicators. They're just as open to hearing bad news as good news, and they're experts at getting their team to support them and be excited about a new mission or project.

Leaders who have good social skills are also good at managing change and resolving conflicts diplomatically. They're rarely satisfied with leaving things as they are, but they don't sit back and make everyone else do the work: they set an example with their own behavior.

So, how can you build social skills?

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How leadership influences student learning

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How leadership influences student learning

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Have you ever been in a group where someone took control of the situation by conveying a clear vision of the group's goals, a marked passion for the work, and an ability to make the rest of the group feel recharged and energized? This person just might be what is called a transformational leader.

Transformational leadership is a leadership style that can inspire positive changes in those who follow. Transformational leaders are generally energetic, enthusiastic, and passionate. Not only are these leaders concerned and involved in the process; they are also focused on helping every member of the group succeed as well.

Quick Background

The concept of transformational leadership was initially introduced by leadership expert and presidential biographer James MacGregor Burns. According to Burns, transformational leadership can be seen when "leaders and followers make each other to advance to a higher level of moral and motivation."﻿﻿

Later, researcher Bernard M. Bass expanded upon Burns's original ideas to develop what is today referred to as Bass's Transformational Leadership Theory. According to Bass, transformational leadership can be defined based on the impact that it has on followers. Transformational leaders, Bass suggested, garner trust, respect, and admiration from their followers.﻿﻿

Mental Health in the Workplace Webinar

Components

Bass also suggested that there were four different components of transformational leadership.

1. Intellectual Stimulation: Transformational leaders not only challenge the status quo; they also encourage creativity among followers. The leader encourages followers to explore new ways of doing things and new opportunities to learn.

2. Individualized Consideration: Transformational leadership also involves offering support and encouragement to individual followers. In order to foster supportive relationships, transformational leaders keep lines of communication open so that followers feel free to share ideas and so that leaders can offer direct recognition of the unique contributions of each follower.

3. Inspirational Motivation: Transformational leaders have a clear vision that they are able to articulate to followers. These leaders are also able to help followers experience the same passion and motivation to fulfill these goals.

4. Idealized Influence: The transformational leader serve as a role model for followers. Because followers trust and respect the leader, they emulate this individual and internalize his or her ideals.

So what are some typical signs of a transformational leader? Groups led by this type of leader tend to be both successful and loyal. They give a lot to the team and care deeply about the group's ability to accomplish its goals. Turnover tends to be quite low as transformational leaders are able to inspire a great deal of commitment in their followers.

In their classic text, Transformational Leadership, authors Bass and Riggio explained:

"Transformational leaders...are those who stimulate and inspire followers to both achieve extraordinary outcomes and, in the process, develop their own leadership capacity. Transformational leaders help followers grow and develop into leaders by responding to individual followers' needs by empowering them and by aligning the objectives and goals of the individual followers, the leader, the group, and the larger organization."

"Research evidence clearly shows that groups led by transformational leaders have higher levels of performance and satisfaction than groups led by other types of leaders," explained psychologist and leadership expert Ronald E. Riggio in an article for Psychology Today.

The reason, he suggests, is that transformational leaders believe that their followers can do their best, leading members of the group to feel inspired and empowered.

What can you do to become a more transformational leader? Leadership experts suggest that having a strong, positive vision of the future plays a critical role. Not only is it important to believe in this vision yourself; you've also got to inspire others to buy into your vision as well.

Link to Well-Being

According to the results of one study, this style of leadership can also have a positive influence on employee well-being.﻿﻿

The study published in the Journal of Occupational and Environmental Medicine involved surveying workers at several different German information and communication technology companies. Researchers asked participants to answers questions about their employer's leadership style.

A score for transformational leadership was then determined based on qualities such as providing intellectual stimulation, giving positive feedback for good performance, leading by example, and helping employees feel like they were making a contribution toward the goals of the group.

The researchers discovered that employees who identified a higher level of transformational leadership in their employers also had higher reported levels of well-being. The effect stayed significant even after researchers controlled for factors that are linked to well-being such as job strain, education, and age.

"The results of this study suggest that a transformational leadership style, which both conveys a sense of trust and meaningfulness and individually challenges and develops employees, also has a positive effect on employee well-being," the authors summarized.

Real-World Applications

So what impact could such results have for managers and workers?

The study's authors suggest that the results are important and can help companies develop leadership training programs that can be used to teach transformational leadership skills. Acquiring communication skills such as resolving conflicts in the workplace and recognizing the needs of employees are an important part of transformational leadership.

"Such training programs can be seen as another essential component of workplace health promotion and prevention efforts and therefore should receive wide support," explained the study's authors.

A Word From Verywell

The transformational style of leadership can be highly effective when used appropriately, but it might not necessarily be the best choice for every situation. In some cases, groups may require a more managerial or autocratic style that involves closer control and greater direction, particularly in situations where group member are unskilled and need a lot of oversight.

One way to improve your own leadership skills is to assess your own current leadership style and think about ways in which your strengths can benefit the group you are leading. By evaluating your own skills, you will be better able to play to your strengths and work on improving your areas of weakness.

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How Do Transformational Leaders Inspire and Motivate Followers?

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Have you ever been in a group where someone took control of the situation by conveying a clear vision of the group's goals, a marked passion for the work, and an ability to make the rest of the group feel recharged and energized? This person just might be what is called a transformational leader.

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21 Core Beliefs That Will Take Your Leadership From Good to Great

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Great leaders come from all eras, all levels of society, and all cultures--but there are certain beliefs great leaders share. These core beliefs are the foundation of your leadership, the things that will help you become successful. See how many you share:

1. Leading by example. Albert Schweitzer said, "Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing." The people around you are watching your every move and looking to emulate you.

2. Balancing vision and execution. Success requires two interrelated elements: a compelling and clearly articulated vision and the ability to inspire others to work with you in carrying it out.

3. Showing respect. Earning the respect of others is important, but showing respect is the foundation of meaningful relationships--and therefore of leadership.

4. Accepting accountability. Being accountable means that you accept responsibility for the outcomes expected of you, both good and bad. You don't blame others, and you do the right thing even when it's not easy.

5. Committing to courage. Aristotle called courage the first virtue, because it makes all of the other virtues possible. Courage is not the absence of fear but the acquired ability to move beyond the fear when times are tough and challenging, because at the end of the day courage is the commitment to begin without any guarantee of success.

6. Delivering inspiration. If you can inspire a group of people to believe in something, you can motivate them to be in constant state of transformation and to ignore the perceived notion of their limitations. Leadership is about making others better as a result of your presence, and making sure it lasts in your absence.

7. Taking risks and learning from mistakes. There's no reward without risk--but even the worst mistakes should never stop you from taking a chance again. Success is all about taking risks.

8. Exhibiting confidence. Confidence is treated as something we're either born with or not, but it can be practiced and learned. Great leaders understand that you must believe in yourself to have the confidence to lead others.

9. Welcoming Optimism. Optimism is a magnet. If you stay positive and optimistic, good things and good people will be drawn to you.

10. Leading with integrity. Integrity is the consistency of your actions, your words, your values, and your moral principles. It's at the center of every true success.

11. Investing in others. When you make the time to invest in others, they will return great value. When you invest in your people you are investing in the future.

12. Encompassing humility. Great leaders remain humble even after they have acquired great success, money, and power. Confidence is who we are on the outside, and humility is who we are on the inside.

13. Contributing through fairness. If you treat people fairly they will likely treat you back with the same. Leaders who are fair and impartial are the ones who are admired and remembered.

14. Maintaining focus. Great leaders live by the acronym FOCUS--Follow One Course Until Successful. They succeed because a concentrated focus determines reality.

15. Manifesting loyalty. The deepest devotion occurs when loyalty is a two- way street. When you lead you need to give your loyalty and give it daily.

16. Embodying honesty. Integrity requires that you be true and honest--and the long reach of electronic media makes keeping secrets a risky proposition. People respect true hearts because they produce honest actions.

17. Honoring trust. The first job of a leader is to inspire trust and build it daily, and great leaders know that trust must be given if it's going to be earned. Leadership is an achievement of trust.

18. Exhibiting appreciation. Everyone wants to be valued and appreciated and recognized for who they are and what they do. As a leader, you must find ways to recognize and reward people when they do great work.

19. Embracing communication. Communication is vital--and that means being not only a great speaker but also a great listener. Great leaders engage directly with what's in front of them, and they never underestimate the power of the smallest interaction.

20. Measuring each moment. Great leaders believe that true leadership is measured in moments, not years. What you do every moment today will influence your future.

21. Leading with character. The things that make you different are the things that define your character, and your character is what defines your leadership.

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21 Core Beliefs That Will Take Your Leadership From Good to Great

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