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I've seen the Ladder of Inference during the Courageous Conversation Beyond Diversity Conference. So, I actually grabbed my notes from then and added them to the figure on page 151. In that session, they talked about how people blur fact and story the higher they go on the ladder and stressed the importance on using the CC compass and questioning to disrupt the blurred beliefs, which relates back to Aguilar's discussion on 'selected data' (pg 152).

In a PD I did on relationships, I pulled some of Aguilar's work from the "how to build trust" section. And, have started using the phrase 'My intention is...' when doing PD.

I also flagged Table 6.2

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"Gaps are areas for growth" pg 134 - I wonder to what extend, if any, is this framed as such for teachers and students. Perhaps it is more so for students than teachers. I think embracing this when we work with teachers honors their work and growth and helps us to feel less frustrated at times.

I also appreciate the simplicity of the sequence flow on the gaps (pg 138)

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Building relationships is so important to be able to have conversations around beliefs. I found the the Ladder of Inference and Table 6.2 to to be very helpful when having conversations around racial comments. For someone who doesn't have a toolbox for this, these possible responses are useful.

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I enjoyed reading about the gaps between currently ability and desired ability. The visual on page 131: Mind the Gap is a handy tool for me to refer back to when understanding which learning need is present. The sentence "Gaps are not deficits," was a good reminder that gaps are areas for growth and that it is my job to help facilitate this growth.

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I enjoyed reading this chapter and learned a lot about the "mind-gap." It was helpful having the gaps defined (Table 5.1) and the examples. This will help me as a coach because I can quickly determine the gaps and address them. As a coach, I think it is also important for me to identify and be transparent with my gaps because it will help me to be a better coach.

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Sometimes the things that people say and do in response to equitable teaching practices frustrate me, so I appreciated the reminder that “Shame is not an effective tool for transformation. It will not help us create a kind, compassionate, and equitable world”. The scientific data on page 121 helped back up the fact that the neurological and physiological response to a perceive threat makes the belief stronger and more entrenched, so “calling someone out” does not solve the problem. As a coach, The Ten Ways to Respond to the question “Am I Racist” is helpful because it shows how to respond with a comment/question to allow opportunity for the person being coached to think, reflect, and grow.

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I was struck by the statement on page 121- "Our mind perceives a threat to our identity like it perceives a threat to our physical existence" It makes sense who white people usually have such a exemplified reaction to the thought that someone says I'm racist. It's the good/bad binary that DiAngelo discusses in her books. I think that knowing about the morality identity will help me as a coach. The other thing that stuck with me is "systems of oppression don't want you to have emotions, so if you reclaim and accept them, you're actively rebuking the system."

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A few things that stood out to me in this chapter were; on page 87 where it states, "But it takes daily practice to examine your own mind, heart, and behaviors for white supremacy. Ultimately, we'll only be healthy, whole, and free if we dismantle the systems in which white supremacy is lodged." It truly is our job to be reflective and make the necessary changes.
Also, the chart on pg. 90 "The Manifestation of White Supremacy." Like Jordan, I have never seen them listed out like that and it really had me in my feelings and I hated to admit that I'd perpetuated some of those ideologies in my earlier career. Now I know better, so I do better.

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I thought it was helpful to read the actual coaching conversation Aguilar had with Stephanie on racism. It was powerful to read and how she used questioning techniques that allowed Stephanie to learn more about the subject. This will help me as a coach because I can use it as a guide when I am coaching teachers. Another thing I think that is helpful was thinking about "My Three Good Things." I think this is effective for everyone because there is a lot of negativity that occurs on a daily basis. Sometimes that can bring us down, but at the end of the day, also focusing on what was positive and why these things happened will end each day positively. Missy

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One thing that stood out to me in this chapter was on page 87:  "It is our responsibility to call attention to when our friends and loved ones ingest these poisons and when we see the spreading the poison to others; it is our responsibility to clean them up.  We have a choice about where we live, what we breathe, and how we respond to the toxins in our world."  It is important that check one another and demand change.  Another thing that stood out to me was reading the bullet points on page 91 under "Criminalization of Student Behavior."  It is sad that some educators don't see all children the same.  As educators, we need to interrupt these inequities. Missy

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This chapter reminded me of Stamped (YA version) by Jason Reynolds and Ibram X Kendi with the recounting of the history. Additionally the NPR study on preschool bias, is a complement to the first bullet point on page 91 under the Criminalization of Student Behavior.

The discussion of the power of words is just that - powerful. I think the majority of us know that language matters and this sections gives detailed knowledge into specific phrasing.

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I appreciated how Aguilar records her conversations between clients. I am able to pull out pieces that are transferrable in a number of related conversations. Particularly in this chapter is the conversation on being called a racist. She points our that we operate from mindsets that are racist and make decisions based on internalized racists beliefs. I think this helps dispute the good/bad binary and set the idea of a racist/racism as an action vs a noun.

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The Gathering Students Experience Data part of the text was so impactful to me.  This chapter reminds me of when Cassandra says facts over feelings. The example of gathering Jordan's data in the class was both factual data with the right amount of compassion. You felt why the data and Jordan's insight was so important as to changing the teachers behavior.

This will impact my coaching by using this strategy with resilient educators.

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The moral identity is my takeaway from this chapter. The term explains all the behaviors I have seen from people who are non-poc when they hear the word 'racist'. This explains the thought of you cant be called a racist and be a good person because people feel it has to be one of the other. The word is taken as an attack on your character and made less about the behavior itself that was racist.

This will impact my coaching because now I have understanding of how hard that word attacks people who are non-poc.

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I like the simplicity in Ibram X. Kendi’s quote “You are either racist or you’re anti racist…you are either upholding white supremacy or you’re actively participating in taking it apart.” The focus on policy instead of ideas, which leads to referrals that categorize kids as “defiant” without a clear and concrete policy for the referral system. I tabbed the Equity Rubric on page 90 to have as a resources to describe what equity is and isn’t in schools. An example that stood out to me in a positive way is “Incorrectly pronouncing names; giving students nicknames” because this may not be done by a teacher with ill intent, but it can lead to a student feeling as though they do not belong in a classroom.

I did appreciate the section “The Power of Words and the Language of Oppression” providing information about how words can lead to liberation or oppression. The idea that in order to transform systems of oppressions we need to take the step of scrutinizing normalized language we use is definitely a simple step that I can get behind ASAP and inform those that I coach.   - Raven

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Celebrating growth stood out to me in this chapter. Celebrating growth was difficult for me as a teacher and it still is as a coach because I always feel like I could do more but I have to remember to celebrate the steps in my journey.

This will impact my coaching by using the data as a reference point to celebrate growth and to show a new way of being.

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This chapter reminded me that our impact has to become more important than our intention. This legacy question is a huge part of my "why" and why social justice work is important to me. We have such as impact on children and this chapter was a reminder of that.

This will impact my coaching by helping me to remember patience as change doesn't happen overnight. I also loved the idea of gathering student experience in data. That was extremely insightful and impactful.

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As Cassandra would say "trust the process" is what stood out to me in this chapter. I liked how she set a goal of what she expected from herself before stepping foot in the teachers room. She knew her intention and what she was looking for. Also, the ode to the school to prison pipeline as it is connected to my "why".

This will impact my coaching by analyzing the data during the reflection to put into my coaching conversation.

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I enjoyed the information about identity in this chapter and how it provided the verbiage to ask someone their identify without coming across negatively and how important identify is as we get to understand our clients.

This will impact my coaching by using the reflection questions on pg.203.

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This is my favorite chapter because it discusses how much we can learn from emotions and their value if we attend to them instead of ignoring them. New information for me was the connection between emotions and needs. This reminded me of the adult learning gaps that we discussed in a previous chapter.

This will impact my coaching by understanding that behind resistance is emotions of an unmet need.

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Something that stood out was the list on pg. 90 of the manifestation of white supremacy. I have never seen them listed in that way before. Also the words of oppression and liberation was key information for me.

It will impact my coaching because I have a deeper understanding behind the stigma or freedom or the words I choose to use.

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One thing that stood out to me was how this work effects Coaches of Color, along with the words of oppression and how they are linked to how we liberate yourself and others.

It will effect my coaching by taking inventory of my emotions and tend to what emotions surface for me during these hard conversations. Also, being mindful of my words when describing a particular group as not to oppress them but to liberate their minds to change behavior.

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This chapter is one of my favorites (my other is 7) because it addresses the mind-gap and this was brand new information to me because it helps you assume the best while determining the need.

It will effect my coaching by allowing me to not take interactions with my clients personally but recognize that their is a gap that needs to be addressed.

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I loved a lot of her conversations about how she was coaching, particularly "If I just give you directive feedback, then I'm robbing you of the opportunity to come to your own insights."

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There was so much I liked about this chapter (and the book) as a new coach. The detailed examples of her conversations, especially her questions, as well as her own thinking/emotions about those conversations are helpful to me. Her discussion on p. 68 about staying grounded in our purpose, especially when we have our own emotional responses or are undecided, is a key learning. We keep the mission at the forefront to avoid being distracted by the personal or political environments we encounter in the schools.

I definitely identified with Stephanie's desire to make a difference but not having the tools and self-awareness to understand what that should look like, as well as her fear of being judged. It has taken years of work to begin to appreciate what I didn't know I didn't know. I agree with the other comments as well that Aguilar's discussions of deficit thinking and focusing on surfacing strengths for both the students in class and the teachers we coach is another foundational learning.

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This chapter came at just the right time for me. I have had many Stephanie's in my coaching history. I wasn't always kind to them and I did let my irritation show. I almost never tend to my emotions and identity when thinking about coaching. This is something I am committed to doing in the future. To find my blind spots and adjust my coaching. My new favorite coaching phrase for this work of a coach is "You dance with who ever shows up to the party." I think sometime I forget that just like our teacher for get that when working with students.

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Wow!  What a powerful chapter.  Being raised in the Midwest and living there the majority of my life there, I can relate to Stephanie and I know when I first started in education, I probably was Stephanie.  The part of the chapter that really hit home with me, was staying "anchored" in who we are which includes our emotions, our identity markers, and our sense of purpose.  It was powerful to me to actually write down my identify markers and then think about affects my experiences with others.  As a coach, teacher often times become very emotional.  I loved reading how the author coached through these emotions and know this will have impact when I am working with teachers.  Another thing that stood out to me was the deficit mindset.  I truly feel that a lot of teachers working in the zone have this mindset.  I think this has an impact on student learning.  As a coach, knowing that some teachers may have this deficit mindset, I want to work with teachers to see all that our scholars have overcome and how resilient and strong they are.  As teachers building on these strengths will help our scholars thrive and achieve to their highest protentional.  Missy

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One thing that stood out to me was the deficit mindset. While I was familiar with the concept I never heard it described with that vocabulary. Often we speak about a lack of a growth mindset but not how the deficit mindset leads into emotions. I like how the author connected the two as they are related in how they effect us as coaches with our clients or teachers and
effect how are clients are with scholars. I also think this chapter begins to explain how this work can be healing and restorative for the client.

This will impact my coaching by conferring more options that explain how and why teachers interact with their scholars. The client may have low expectations for scholars due to a deficit mindset. Additionally,  they may have an unconscious deficit mindset about themselves. Often that may only be discovered through transformational coaching.

I related to what Kimberly said last week about this book aligning with Gholdy Muhammad's work in "Cultivating Genius". As I was reading that this this week there was a quote that circled me back to coaching for equity. The quote said, "transformation has to be collaborative".

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I texted Jordan while reading this chapter and said it was really speaking to me. Certainly in the course of my career I have acted and thought like Stephanie. I sat in my fragility a bit and then when reviewing this quote struck me- "We can't do better until we know better, we can't know better until we reflect and learn from our emotions." (page 51). Also on page 58 "Stay in the discomfort. It won't kill us." In speaking my truth, I have pitied the situations my students have come through. Not coming from a rosey childhood myself, I have empathized in certain situations but "can't imagine" others. I was not seeing the beauty in the community. I need to empathize and see the scholars who live in hotels as resilient and brave. I've often struggled with explaining what TZ means to friends and family. Aguilar gave me the words I can use that won't dehumanize scholars. I've spent some time reading and studying and learning about racism and white supremacy so I feel more equipped to recognize when there is an equity issue. Stephanie's story helped me to understand the way to approach it and some reactions I may (probably will) encounter. And it reminds me to connect to my own emotions and purpose.

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Chapter 2 really brought me into my feelings! I felt like at some points in her coaching conversation with Stephanie, that she could've been talking to me at that point in my career. I think it's easy to get caught up in the deficit mindset because we don't want to take responsibility for what we are doing, or not doing, to move towards equity. It was helpful for me to read through her coaching conversations around the deficit language because that is a current issue that I have experienced. Also, the statement about feedback (pg. 53-3rd paragraph) states that some say they want feedback but their intention for asking doesn't mean they truly want it or can hear it. This is also a barrier of mine, so reading how she says that you can see red flags, strengths, skills and positive attributes at the same time, was reassuring me for. It's also important for me to stay flexible and allow myself to feel and acknowledge my own feelings. "With awareness, you can act with intentionality." I look forward to contributing to the healing and transformation of our education world.

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In this chapter she mentions the importance of experiencing emotions (p. 31) and expands on that throughout the book. I really enjoyed this aspect because there's lots of emotions in daily life and add trying to have uncomfortable conversations with teachers is a lot at times. And, I feel like teachers view the emotions of their students negatively and sometimes criminalize them. In skimming through a 2nd time, I'm seeing a connection with her 5 principles of transformational coaching and Gholdy Muhammad's 5 pursuits of HRL, which I didn't catch the 1st time around, so I'll be curiously to lean into that during the conversation and moving forward.

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One thing that stood out to me was the 5 principles of transformational coaching, compassion, curiosity, connection, courage and purpose. These 5 principles remind us as coaches to give grace, question for understanding, the interconnectedness or relationships between concepts, to be flexible and take risk and to always know our why.

This will impact my coaching by being a critical component of decision making towards my clients through labeling these principles throughout my coaching journey.

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There were a few quotes that made me realize that I was, at times, going into coaching conversations without checking my own biases. For example, on pg. 26 it says "...when teachers blame students for their academic struggles, I felt that all I could respond with was my opinion-which made our conversation feel like a debate. I felt isolated, confused, and disempowered. And I was ineffective." It made me realize that 1. I was not alone in this feeling. And 2. That my reason for ineffectiveness was because I was pushing my thoughts rather than listening for understanding. When pg. 35 stated "No one can learn from you if you think that they suck"...that really stuck with me. My take-away was teaching more from a place of compassion and much less from a place of judgement.

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Worksheets and Other Resources for Coaches

This webpage offers a variety of documents that can help both new and seasoned coaches better serve their clients.

Many documents are from Elena's book The Art of Coaching, but we've included some additional tools not found in the book. Click from the list below to jump to a category of documents or download the entire set of documents using the button below.

The Art of Coaching Reader's Guide

The Art of Coaching Reader's Guide is a collection of guiding questions that will enrich your experience with the text. It's great if both for independent readers and those who are using the book with group.

Download Free Worksheets and Other Tools

Tools found in The Art of Coaching:

Additional tools not found in The Art of Coaching:

Tools from The Art of Coaching
For Planning & Reflection: For Observation and Debriefs: For Conversations with Clients: For Coach Development: For Hiring:
Additional Tools
(Not found in The Art of Coaching)
For Planning & Reflection: For Conversations with Clients:
* These resources are from the Onward Workbook.
For Coach Development:
Recommended Podcast Episodes
Podcast Starter Episodes
Episode 29: Coaching Tools for Transformation: Core Values, Mind the Gap and Strengths-Based Coaching

Episode 43: The Spheres of Influence

Episode 83: Coaching Conversation: How Do I Set Our Coaching Program Up for Success?

Episode 98: When it Feels Like it's Never Enough
Coaching Emotions
Episode 36: Kathrina Mendez Revisited: Virtual Reality: Confronting Self-Doubt

Episode 37: How to ACE Your Coaching Conversations

Episode 127: Coaching Emotions: Anger

Episode 128: Coaching Emotions: Sadness

Episode 129: Coaching Emotions: Joy

Episode 147: Coaching Resistance: Part 1 - What is Resistance

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Worksheets and Other Resources for Coaches This webpage offers a variety of documents that can help both new and seasoned coaches better serve their clients. Many documents are from Elena's book The Art of Coaching, but we've included some additional tools not found in the book.