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God, as 2020 comes to an end, I'd like to say thank you for everything you've blessed me with. Please help all of us come out of 2020 as strong and kind people. I pray for better days to come ahead for our country and for the whole world.

Please guide me to always do my best and to do everything for Your glory. Please help me push through the last school week.

Thank you for everything.
Amen

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Through the lows and highs, I am moving towards God. I am where I am today through God's grace and guidance. I know that everything I went through and will go through is God's way of showing His love for me.

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Some may say it's easier for us now because there are no more exams, and I agree with them, but there is no doubt in the amount of anxiety I feel because of this. I overthink my grades from the past, questioning if my efforts were sufficient to get me into a good school. Knowing that there's nothing I can do about also piles on. The waiting for the results is the worst. Both the best and worst possible scenarios pop up into my mind.

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I know I am very fortunate to even be "complaining" about this, but this year has been a terrible roller coaster. Other than the pandemic causing a halt on our lives, the govenrment's lack of concern and care for its citizens is clearly seen. Seeing how everyone is just suffering because of negligence of those in power is upsetting and makes you feel so helpless.

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We are fortunate enough to see each other through the screens of our laptops. We still are able to communicate with each other, but it's no doubt that this setup just sucks the life out of you. I miss seeing my friends in real life. I miss going to school and wanting to come home everyday. I miss going to church with my family. I miss real life social interactions.

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When worldly efforts reach their limitations, and even before that, I pray and ask for guidance. I just talk to God like He's one of my close friends and let Him know what I went through and how I feel about these things. It feels like every time I do this a burden's been lifted off me. I know and feel that God has guided me and will continue to guide me. Through that, I feel a sense of serenity.

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- I always cared about my grades, cared in a way that made me extremely sensitive about it. I'd be very happy if I got good scores in the same way I'd feel extremely down if I got low ones. I can handle low scores because I know that that's the reality of life, but I always feel a sense of calm and security when I tell my parents and sister about it. The queasiness in my stomach would go away and I now know everything will be fine.

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The past few months of online school have been draining. So much emails would pile up, modules with similar deadlines, and just the overall stress of having to face a computer everyday. Despite these, I find myself progressing everyday because of my family and friends. My friends and I help each other even if all of us seem quite lost and confused. There are times we'd just rant to each other to ease thr stress.