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He is feeling average but he hates feeling average

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He is feeling average but he hates feeling average

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What does he mean with "feeling divided"?

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What issues happened before this car ride that caused the author to feel this way ?

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Is the character excited about something (about the night) in the third stanza?

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Does he want to feel freedom or is he done with his life?

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Is the writer happy or unhappy about their situation?

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Is the author Depressed?

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Does the character want to live?

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Are they lonely? In the last stanza, is the author comparing themselves to a live bird?

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the line "This is the part I would like to see blindfolded some morning, dragged into a courtyard, and shot" does the speaker mean he wants to see the view every morning or not?

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Towards the end, will the author still be eager to share his voice while he's dying?

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is the author confused with how they want to continue their life? Do they want to die or to be free? Or will dying set them free?

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Is the character of a poem old?

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The reading can be fairly heavy sometimes, I.E. has some serious content within it, what is the reason for this (in relation to the poem topic)?