# data[].attributes.body
This video from YouTube has serveral non-binary and transgender people explain how they came out and why pronouns are important for them. It also gives some ways to make LGBTQ+ people feel more comfortable by not using gendered languege and other miscellanious strategies

# data[].attributes.body
Not every student knows or feels comfortable sharing their correct pronouns and teachers should not force students to decide. “Students whose gender presentation may not match their gender identity are forced to lie or too out themselves in a new and possibly unsafe environment, while those who are unsure of their gender identity are made to feel uncomfortable and forced to choose a pronoun.” Forcing students to say their pronouns can lead to distress because they may not be sure what they are. Additionally, students may not feel comfortable with saying the correct pronouns with people that they aren’t as close with.

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.description
Anne Gordon explores how implicit bias plays out in the ways law school professors, as well as those in other disciplines, engage with students -- and what can be done to mitigate it.

# data[].attributes.body
People may not want to follow the pronouns of students as it goes against their religion and/or core beliefs. “This isn’t just about a pronoun, it’s about what that pronoun means,” Tyson Langhofer, senior counsel for the ADF, says of the school lawsuits. “No one should be forced to contradict their core beliefs just to keep a job.” “Aidyn’s orchestra teacher, John Kluge. Kluge, 29, believes ‘it is sinful to promote transgender behavior,’” A teacher at Brownsburg High School in Brownsburg did not follow the preferred pronouns of a transgender student in his class. He said that it went against his religion and that he did not believe in transgender rights. This is a problem with requiring schools to help accommodate transgender students. Everyone has their own beliefs and values.

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.readable_text
Aidyn Sucec remembers how much better he felt toward the end of eighth grade when, after years of struggling with his identity, he told his family he was transgender. It was the spring of 2017, and Aidyn's anxiety and depression began to lift as people embraced the teenager as "him."

"My family and friends began to recognize me as who I am," Aidyn, who's now 16, said in court documents.

Before Aidyn, who was designated female at birth, started at Brownsburg High School in Brownsburg, Indiana that fall, his mother, Laura Sucec, worked with school officials to make sure his new name and gender would be logged into Brownsburg's database. She wanted to be sure teachers knew him as Aidyn and didn't use his former name-his "dead name"-when addressing him.

The school was quick to accommodate Aidyn, and with input from Sucec and other parents, it soon allowed all trans students to use bathrooms, names and pronouns aligned with their gender identity. But that change, which was meant to protect the students, was a problem for Aidyn's orchestra teacher, John Kluge. Kluge, 29, believes "it is sinful to promote transgender behavior," according to a federal lawsuit he filed in June that accuses the Brownsburg Community School Corporation (BCSC) of forcing him to resign because of his beliefs. The BCSC policies do not specifically mention bathroom use or names for trans students, but Sucec and Kluge say those changes were made during the summer of 2017.

The case is one of at least three pending against public schools in three states-Indiana, Virginia, and Ohio-by teachers who say they were disciplined for refusing to use the preferred names or pronouns of transgender students. But beyond arguing over names and pronouns, the lawsuits raise the question of whose rights take precedence when transgender students' demands for recognition and respect clash with teachers' personal beliefs. All of the teachers say they were forced to choose between keeping their jobs or acting in a way that conflicted with their religious views.

The lawsuits come in the midst of heated national battles over LGBTQ rights, which the Trump Administration has sought to curtail. In two closely watched cases before the U.S. Supreme Court, the justices in October heard arguments about whether employers have the right to fire gay and transgender people because of their sexual orientation and gender identity, or if a federal law prohibiting sex discrimination in the workplace protects the employees. The Trump Administration has filed briefs in support of the employers in those cases. It has also sought to roll back Obama-era protections for trans students and medical patients, banned trans people from serving in the military, and supported the rights of certain businesses to refuse service to gay people due to religious objections to same-sex marriage. Such actions stand in contrast to recent public opinion polling by Gallup, which shows that most Americans believe trans people should be allowed to serve openly in the military, and that gay and lesbian people should have equal access to job opportunities and the same rights as heterosexual married couples to adopt children.

The Alliance Defending Freedom (ADF), a Christian legal group known for bringing religious-freedom cases to advance conservative causes, is providing legal support to the teachers in all three lawsuits. The ADF also defended Jack Phillips, a Colorado baker who cited his Christian beliefs in refusing to bake a wedding cake for a same-sex couple in 2012; Phillips won a partial U.S. Supreme Court victory last year when the justices ruled that Colorado's Civil Rights Commission had shown religious bias in sanctioning Phillips.

"This isn't just about a pronoun, it's about what that pronoun means," Tyson Langhofer, senior counsel for the ADF, says of the school lawsuits. "No one should be forced to contradict their core beliefs just to keep a job."

Aidyn and his mother agree with Langhofer on one thing: that it's not just about a pronoun. To them, it's about much more.

"When anybody denies your child their personhood, their identity, denies them that supportive environment, they're actively harming your child," says Laura Sucec.

"I spent an hour a day for 180 days with Mr. Kluge, watching as he avoided me and other transgender students. Mr. Kluge's behavior made me feel alienated, upset, and dehumanized," Aidyn, who played the violin in Kluge's orchestra, wrote in a legal declaration in August. "It made me dread going to orchestra class each day."

While Kluge temporarily received a religious accommodation from the school district and started calling all students by their last names only, in an effort to avoid first names, Aidyn said other kids noticed Kluge's refusal to acknowledge his gender. "At one point, my stand partner asked me why Mr. Kluge wouldn't just say my name," he wrote. "I felt forced to tell him that it was because I'm transgender."

***

An estimated 150,000 teens, ages 13 to 17, identify as transgender in the United States-0.7%, the highest percentage of any age group- according to a 2017 study released by the Williams Institute at the University of California, Los Angeles, School of Law. As the number of trans students in K-12 schools grows, LGBTQ advocates are calling on schools to better support a population that is already more vulnerable than most kids to harassment, bullying and violence. Seventy five percent of trans students feel unsafe at school, according to a 2015 survey conducted by GLSEN, an organization that advocates for LGBTQ rights in schools. Half of the trans students surveyed said they were prevented from using names or pronouns that align with their gender identity, and 65% said they had been verbally harassed at school. A quarter of trans students said they'd been physically harassed at school, and 12% said they'd been physically assaulted.

Similarly, a survey of trans adults found that 24% said they were verbally, physically or sexually harassed in college, and 16% of those who experienced harassment said they left college because of it, according to the 2015 U.S. Transgender Survey conducted by the National Center for Transgender Equality.

There remains a patchwork of policies for trans students in school districts across the country. Some states have issued guidelines to schools, but policies differ from one district to the next.

When Sucec approached the Brownsburg district about changing Aidyn's name and gender in the school database, for instance, she learned it had no policy for accommodating trans students, even though Aidyn was not the first. Sucec says she and other parents advised school officials as they made accommodations for trans students.

This lack of clarity has sparked several court battles, usually involving students demanding the right to use the bathroom that aligns with their gender identity.

In 2008, trans actress Nicole Maines-identified in court documents at the time as Susan Doe-sued her Maine school district when it denied her permission to use the girls' bathroom at her elementary school. The case ended up in the state Supreme Court, which ruled in Maines' favor in 2014. It was the first time a state had declared it unlawful for a school to deny a transgender student access to the bathroom that aligns with their gender identity, but it hasn't stopped states from trying.

In 2017, a Pennsylvania school district settled with three transgender teens who had sued after being denied access to the bathrooms that match their identity. As part of the settlement, the school board directed all district schools to end bathroom restrictions for trans students. Last year, a federal judge in Florida ruled in favor of 17-year-old Drew Adams, who had sued his school for the right to use the boys' bathroom. "Now I can finally be like any other kid at my school, any other boy," Adams, who has openly identified as male since 2015, said in an interview with local news in 2018. The St. Johns County School Board has appealed the ruling to a federal appeals court. In August, a nearly five-year battle waged by Gavin Grimm of Virginia finally ended when a federal judge ruled that his school had discriminated against Grimm, a transgender male student, when it denied him access to the boys' bathroom when he was 15.

But schools also face obstacles when they attempt to accommodate transgender students. In October, a Georgia school district that had adopted a transgender-friendly bathroom policy - in line with the ruling in Adams' case - reversed the decision in the face of death threats, vandalism and other forms of harassment.

Though many of the most high-profile cases involving the rights of trans students have taken place at the K-12 level, tensions arise in higher education as well. There are an estimated 139,000 trans college students in the U.S., Reuters reported in August. And polling shows younger generations are more familiar with people who are transgender or nonbinary. More than a third of Gen Zers (born after 1996) say they personally know someone who uses gender-neutral pronouns, according to a Pew Research Center report published this year. The American Society of Plastic Surgeons says gender confirmation surgeries in the U.S. have nearly tripled in recent years, from 3,200 in 2016 to 9,576 in 2018. But many colleges still lack gender-neutral bathrooms and housing or non-discrimination policies that protect trans students. In August, a mental health study published in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine found that transgender, gender nonconforming and nonbinary college students are two to four times more likely to experience mental health problems than their peers. The lead author of the study, Boston University School of Public Health assistant professor Sarah Ketchen Lipson, concluded, "there has never been a more important time for colleges and universities to take action to protect and support trans, genderqueer, and nonbinary students on campus."

But the lawsuits from Kluge and other teachers concern challenges whose solutions aren't as simple as changing signage on bathroom doors, or switching names in a database.

LGBTQ advocates and mental health experts say the evidence is clear: transgender students do better when they're not made to feel awkward or isolated from their classmates. "The overwhelming body of evidence about every single student in every classroom in this country is that when you treat a student with respect, when you pronounce their name correctly, when you use the right name, when you refer to them in terms that are appropriate to who they are-no matter who that student is-they do better," says Eliza Byard, executive director of GLSEN. "They feel like they belong in their classroom, they are more likely to listen to you as an educator, and they have the simple ability to participate fully in school life."

But attorneys on the opposite side say tolerance should be a "two-way street" and schools' actions amount to a "heckler's veto" of religious and free-speech rights. Many conservative Christians argue that gender is determined at birth as either male or female and "it cannot be changed," per Kluge's lawsuit.

"We see a growing hostility in the culture to religious liberty, and so this is another example of that. And we want to fight those examples hard with all the tools we have," says Curt Smith, chairman of the conservative Indiana Family Institute, which is supporting Kluge's lawsuit. "The larger goal is to have the government realize it cannot coerce speech."

***

From an early age, Aidyn Sucec said he struggled with his identity, "knowing that there was something different about me." He'd been treated for depression and anxiety since second grade, but it wasn't until he turned 14 and came out as transgender that Aidyn said his mental and emotional health improved. He changed his name to Aidyn on his birth certificate and social security card, and friends and relatives accepted his new identity.

"My family and friends refer to me as Aidyn," he said in his legal declaration. "Indeed, everybody in my life now refers to me as Aidyn."

But that wasn't the case in Kluge's orchestra class.

When Kluge, who had been teaching at Brownsburg since 2014, first raised religious objections with the Brownsburg superintendent to the school's transgender-friendly policies, his lawsuit says he was given an "ultimatum." He could use students' transgender names, resign or be fired. Kluge suggested he be allowed to address all students by their last names only, as an athletic coach would, and the district approved. But five months later, the lawsuit says, officials told him that the plan was creating tension in the classroom and later said some students "were offended by his use of last names."

Kluge's beliefs were clear to Aidyn. Throughout the year, Aidyn said Kluge refused to use his name. Instead, he said Kluge would nod or wave at him in class to get his attention, or call him by his surname. When Kluge was out one day, Aidyn said the substitute teacher referred to him in front of the entire class by his former "dead name," something Aidyn described as "intensely humiliating and traumatizing."

The school principal, Bret Daghe, told Kluge he had until the end of the school year, May 2018, to resign. (Daghe did not respond to a request for comment.) According to the lawsuit, Kluge submitted a "conditional" letter of resignation on April 30, 2018, then changed his mind and sent a letter on May 25 rescinding his resignation. But Kluge says that same day, the school locked him out of buildings and internet access and posted his job.

The mandate that Kluge use trans students' names and pronouns "left Mr. Kluge with an untenable choice of maintaining his employment while violating his sincerely-held religious beliefs on an almost daily basis, or losing his employment-the chief financial means of support for his family," his lawsuit said. At the time he lost his job, Kluge was earning a salary of $46,250, plus an additional stipend of $5,200 a year for being the school's music director.

(The Brownsburg Community School Corporation and the individual defendants, who have asked the court to dismiss Kluge's case, declined to comment on pending litigation.)

In Virginia, high school French teacher Peter Vlaming similarly accused the West Point School Board of violating his rights to free speech and free exercise of religion under state law, when he was fired in December 2018 for refusing to use male pronouns when referring to a trans male student. "He wasn't fired for something he said. He was fired for what he didn't say," his lawsuit filed on Sept. 30 says.

According to Vlaming, he'd agreed to use the student's preferred first name in class but refused to use male pronouns and was accused of using female pronouns in the student's absence. In one incident, the lawsuit said, he slipped up and called out, "Don't let her hit the wall!" during a class exercise in which he feared the student, who was wearing virtual reality goggles, could be harmed. According to the lawsuit, the trans student, who has not been publicly identified, approached him after class and said, "Mr. Vlaming, you may have your religion, but you need to respect who I am."

West Point Public Schools said Vlaming, 47, was disciplined for violating a school district policy prohibiting discrimination on the basis of gender identity. The school board and staff "acted within the law and division policy, and we deny any liability to Mr. Vlaming" and plan to "vigorously defend against any claims," the school district said in a statement.

Philosophy professor Nicholas Meriwether's lawsuit filed in federal court in November 2018 also claims that his religious beliefs were violated by Shawnee State University in Portsmouth, Ohio. Meriwether-who typically uses "sir" or "ma'am" and "Mr." or "Ms." when addressing students in class-was investigated and had a warning placed in his personnel file after he refused to use female pronouns to address a trans female student. University officials said Meriwether's treatment of the student created a "hostile environment" and violated the school's nondiscrimination policy. In September, a federal magistrate judge recommended that the suit be dismissed, refuting Meriwether's First Amendment claims. His attorneys filed an objection, and a U.S. District judge will issue a final ruling.

The university declined to comment on specifics of the case while litigation is ongoing but defended its actions. "We are confident, though, that as details about the case come to light, it will become clear that efforts were made by Shawnee State to both respect our faculty member's deep rooted religious beliefs and our student's right to equal treatment in the classroom," a university spokesperson said in an email.

Langhofer, of the Alliance Defending Freedom, says Vlaming has not been able to find another teaching job since being fired, while Meriwether, 62, remains a tenured professor at Shawnee State. Kluge has also been unable to find a job in another school and is working as a contractor and teaching private music lessons instead, says Michael Cork, an attorney representing him.

***

Justin Driver, a Yale law professor and author of The Schoolhouse Gate: Public Education, the Supreme Court, and the Battle for the American Mind, says he would be surprised to see the teachers prevail in their suits because such a decision would conflict with the 2006 U.S. Supreme Court ruling in Garcetti v. Ceballos. That decision said a public official's free speech rights are only protected when they're acting as private citizens, not while performing official duties.

Paul Castillo, a students' rights attorney for Lambda Legal, agrees. "It is not the public square," Castillo says of classrooms. "And these students, particularly in a K-12 environment, are mandated to be there. They have no choice, and they ought not to be subjected to discrimination." Castillo is representing Indiana Youth Group, an LGBTQ advocacy organization that has filed a motion to intervene as a defendant in Kluge's lawsuit because it has an interest in the outcome and believes it can better represent the rights of trans students.

Driver expects lawsuits challenging the rights of transgender students to increase, and he thinks the Supreme Court is likely to take up the issue at some point. "The questions that divide American society often find their fiercest battles arising within the schoolhouse itself," Driver says. "The schoolhouse is where people on both sides of the issue feel strongest, and I think that's because what young people learn in American public schools, they carry with them for the rest of their lives."

In a speech at Notre Dame Law School in October, U.S. Attorney General William Barr called public schools "ground zero" for "attacks on religion," citing laws in New Jersey and California that require schools to include the social, political and economic contributions of LGBTQ people in the curriculum. Barr said "many feel" that curriculum is "inconsistent with traditional Christian teaching."

Byard, of GLSEN, says attitudes like that are all the more reason teachers should respect the identity of trans students. Given the level of polarization in the country over issues of gender and identity, Byard says, trans students "are being used as a political football by people at the highest levels of government." With studies showing them already at higher than average risk for depression and suicide, being caught in the middle of bitter political fights only makes things worse.

"They are in danger, and every single teacher out there is in a position to help them through the simple act of using the right name and the right pronoun every day," Byard says. "The ability to help them is entirely within their control. It is a daily act of affirmation that could save someone's life."

For Aidyn, school became intolerable after Kluge's departure turned into a controversial issue that sparked protests at a school board meeting and bullying at school. In court documents, Aidyn said several students hurled insults at him when he showed up for the start of his sophomore year in the fall of 2018. One student "called me 'the fag that got Kluge fired,'" he said.

A week into that school year, he withdrew from Brownsburg. Laura Sucec says Aidyn is now taking online classes at home through Indiana Connections Academy, a free online public school program. He's doing well, she says - earning good grades, preparing to graduate a year early, and feeling more relaxed. But she wishes he'd never had to endure the misery that led him to leave Brownsburg High.

"He's going through the process of identifying who he is as a person. That's something that everybody goes through," says Sucec. "But when somebody identifies as being transgender, that's much more difficult to go through, because that's something that not everybody understands."

Write to Katie Reilly at Katie.Reilly@time.com.

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.title
'This Isn't Just About a Pronoun.' Teachers and Trans Students Are Clashing Over Whose Rights Come First

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.description
Aidyn Sucec remembers how much better he felt toward the end of eighth grade when, after years of struggling with his identity, he told his family he was transgender. It was the spring of 2017, and Aidyn's anxiety and depression began to lift as people embraced the teenager as "him."

# data[].attributes.body
This flag is used to represent the transgender community.

# data[].attributes.body
This flag is used to represent the nonbinary community.

# data[].attributes.headline
What does transgender and non-binary mean

# data[].attributes.subject
What does transgender and non-binary mean

# data[].attributes.body
Someone who is transgender identifies as a different gender than he/she was assigned at birth. A non-binary person doesn't identify with either gender and often uses gender-natural pronouns (they/them, xe/xem, etc).

# data[].attributes.body
Part of being a supportive, respectful and inclusive school is addressing all students by their correct pronouns. According to Welcoming Schools, A Project From the Human Right Campaign foundation, 51% of trans students are not addressed by their preferred name or pronoun in school. Addressing students by their wrong pronouns often creates a hostel, excusive and unsafe environment. That is why students should always be addressed by their correct pronouns in school and everywhere in life.

# data[].attributes.body
Not following peoples perferred pronouns can make other transgender people uncomfortable with their identity and scared to come out. Erin Cross, a professer at the Univerity of Pennsylvania has said that to try and create a more open environement, you should try to aviod using gendered langeuege and accidentally mislabeling someone. "Avoiding gendered language is one of the easiest ways to avoid misgendering students. Instead of saying 'boys and girls' or 'ladies and gentlemen,' try 'folks' or 'everyone.' “ These are some of the ways teachers have begun to try to create an open environment for trans students. When you have a open environement, you can help people come out instead of forcing them into the closet

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.description
By using pronouns thoughtfully, educators can make all students feel welcome and provide support for children who are gender nonconforming.

# data[].attributes.body
Attempted suicide rates among transgender and non-binary teens is extremely high. “More than half of transgender male teens...reported attempting suicide in their lifetime, while 29.9 percent of transgender female teens said they attempted suicide. Among non-binary youth, 41.8 percent...stated that they had attempted suicide at some point in their lives.” I got this information from the  article New Study Reveals Shocking Rates of Attempted Suicide Among Trans Adolescent by the

Human Rights Campaign. Purposefully addressing someone by the wrong pronouns is harmful to the persons mental health and confidence. When done continually it can increase the chances of the person developing depression and anxiety which can lead to suicide attempts. This is one of many reason that a school community should be forced to address students by their correct pronouns.

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.readable_text
Harrowing statistics from a study recently published by the American Academy of Pediatrics revealed alarming levels of attempted suicide among transgender youth -- with the highest rates among transgender boys and non-binary youth. The findings emphasize the urgency of building welcoming and safe communities for LGBTQ young people, particularly for transgender youth.

More than half of transgender male teens who participated in the survey reported attempting suicide in their lifetime, while 29.9 percent of transgender female teens said they attempted suicide. Among non-binary youth, 41.8 percent of respondents stated that they had attempted suicide at some point in their lives.

Many transgender young people experience family rejection, bullying and harassment, or feel unsafe for simply being who they are - all of which can be added risk factors for suicide. Earlier this year, HRC released its 2018 LGBTQ Youth Report, which detailed similarly alarming experiences -- but also significant perseverance among LGBTQ young people in the face of daunting challenges.

There are steps that can be taken to help prevent this tragedy.

HRC Foundation's Welcoming Schools program provides specific guidance to parents, teachers and the wider community for preventing anti-LGBTQ bullying and aggression in schools. This can be as simple as responding appropriately to anti-LGBTQ comments in the classroom, or encouraging educators to promote inclusivity and diversity in their lesson plans.

Parents and families can start by learning the facts and educating themselves about issues that impact LGBTQ youth. Whether or not families have openly LGBTQ children, it is vital to make home a safe and affirming space for all identities.

If you or someone you know may be at risk of suicide, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. If you're a young LGBTQ person and need to talk to someone, call The Trevor Project's 24-hour crisis hotline for youth at 1-866-488-7386. If you are a transgender person of any age, call the Trans Lifeline at 877-565-8860.

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.title
Study Shows Shocking Rates of Attempted Suicide Among Trans Teens

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.description
Harrowing statistics from a study recently published by the American Academy of Pediatrics revealed alarming levels of attempted suicide among transgender youth -- with the highest rates among transgender boys and non-binary youth. The findings emphasize the urgency of building welcoming and safe communities for LGBTQ young people, particularly for transgender youth.

# data[].attributes.body
People are becoming more curious about their pronouns and the topic of gender identity is becoming extremely relevant in children and teens. “According to Merriam-Webster, searches for “they” in 2019 increased by 313% over the previous year, demonstrating that people are more curious about gender-neutral pronouns—and pronouns in general.”
As students are looking more into their gender identity and who they are, schools should make an effort for them to feel comfortable. All teenagers and children are curious about who they are, and if schools could be more inclusive towards transgender and nonbinary students, it might make a huge difference in a child’s life and identity.

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.readable_text
"Hello, my name is Mellie Davis, and I use she/her pronouns." This is simple for me as a cisgender woman. It is not that easy for some students and faculty members who don't fall along the typical gender binary. Traditionally, teachers address students as "boys and girls" or in single-gender schools as "girls/ladies" or "boys/gentlemen." In attempts to be more inclusive, some schools use gender-neutral terms like "friends" or "scholars" to acknowledge groups. While this is a good step, it does not address the individual student. It doesn't allow for the discussion of individual pronouns.

According to Merriam-Webster, searches for "they" in 2019 increased by 313% over the previous year, demonstrating that people are more curious about gender-neutral pronouns-and pronouns in general. In Sweden, we are seeing the introduction of the gender-neutral pronounhen to be used with hon (she) and han (he) as well as gender-neutral school pilots where the teachers avoid using the pronouns "him" and "her" when talking to the children. Instead they refer to them as "friends," by their first names only, or by the gender neutral pronoun hen.

We've known for a while that children in early elementary school are already noticing and have questions about gender. "Patterns of Gender Development," published in the Annual Review of Psychology in 2010, shows that rudimentary stereotypes develop by age 2, and many children develop basic gender stereotypes by age 3. Students in elementary and primary schools are already having internal and playground conversations about what a "boy" does or what a "girl" does. They are developmentally in the space of gender. According to Yardsticks: Children in the Classroom Ages 4-14 by Chip Wood, at ages 6 and 7, children begin "sorting" and categorizing, and by 8, children typically prefer to play with same-gender groups. Why not give them the language to understand gender, its fluidity, and their autonomy in letting others know who they are?
Why This Is Important
A key goal of many independent schools is to build a student's sense of self and self-advocacy. When we, as educators, make the statement that students have the ability to say how they want to be addressed, students can build that sense of self and self-advocacy. When we allow staff, faculty, and parents to do the same, we lay the groundwork for individuals to feel safe and seen, normalizing the experience.

A2010 GLSEN study shared recommended practices for creating safe classrooms; one of the most critical steps is the use of inclusive language (as well as curricular resources that include representation of LGBT people). Discussing gender identity, gender expression, and societal constructs about gender in the classroom can help students become more accepting of others' gender identities.

Using a person's pronouns shows respect and acknowledgment. Students, teachers, and staff who use they/them pronouns may feel alienated when they are referred to as "she" or "he." It is important to use a person's correct pronouns whenever you write about them or speak about them with others, not just when that person is present. One student at our school put it best in a discussion with a younger sibling who was having trouble understanding why their teacher uses they/them pronouns. The student told the sibling: "It doesn't really matter if you understand why they use that pronoun; what matters is that we respect that as their pronoun and use it because that's what they want."
Where Can We Share Pronouns
The naming of gender pronouns at the beginning of the school year, at the beginning of meetings, and on nametags removes part of the stigma attached to having to correct someone who uses an incorrect pronoun. Making it a regular practice to share pronouns relieves some of the stress on those who feel like they may be misgendered.

When applicants spend a day in our second grade classroom, before the guest arrives, I'll say, "Today we have a visitor, and their name is 'X.' " Some of our current students will inevitably ask, "Are they a boy or girl?" The response to this question usually is, "We don't know. We should ask when they arrive." This allows students to shift their thinking about assigning a gender to a name, making it clear that we don't need to know their gender in order to be welcoming and that we allow the visiting student to tell us how they would like to be addressed.

An important book that is part of our identity unit isJamie Is Jamie: A Book About Being Yourself and Playing Your Way by Afsaneh Moradian. It's a story about a new student who visits a classroom and plays with various toys. The question arises, "Is Jamie a girl or a boy?" The book's response is "Jamie is Jamie."

For the adults in the community, sharing pronouns at the start of a meeting is a quick and easy way to reinforce the use of and respect for individuals' pronouns. Also, including them on nametags and badges as well as email signatures offers multiple opportunities for reference.
Beyond She/Her and He/His
It is important to recognize that gender is a social construct. Sex is biological. The signifiers we assign to what is girl or boy come from what society accepts as masculine and feminine.

Sharing pronouns opens up possibilities for transgender students and gender-nonconforming students to feel safe about who they are and to be seen and addressed exactly the way they want.

The singular form of "they" is a gender-neutral pronoun that allows for flexibility. A second option is using pronouns that completely depart from traditional usages, such as the gender-neutral "ze" (pronounced "zee") or "hir" (pronounced "here"). Some students or coworkers may use their name in place of a pronoun.

If you find they/them pronouns tricky to use in everyday speech or writing, you're not alone. That tongue-tripping feeling goes away with practice. A helpful tip: Practice using someone's they/them pronouns in conversation with a third party, like a partner or close friend, so you can get the hang of that person's pronouns without worrying that you'll "slip up" in person.

And remember: The "how" is linked to the "why." We are in the business of educating and affirming the students we work with. The most important thing is to begin. It may be scary for some. The truth is, you more than likely will make a mistake and may say something incorrectly. We should show our students that we embody the same values we teach them: It's OK to make mistakes, we learn from mistakes, and sometimes the scary things are the most important things to engage.

Picture This

Picture books are a great way to introduce many topics to lower school students, and the idea of gender and pronouns is no different. Here are some books I have used in my classroom.

The Gender Wheel: A Story About Bodies and Gender for Every Body
by Maya Christina Gonzalez

They, She, He, Me: Free to Be!
by Maya Christina Gonzalez and Matthew Sg

Who Are You?: The Kid's Guide to Gender Identity
by Brook Pessin-Whedbee

Jamie Is Jamie: A Book About Being Yourself and Playing Your Way
by Afsaneh Moradian

When Aidan Became a Brother
by Kyle Lukoff

Resources for Teachers

Asking For and Using Gender Pronouns
Bryn Mawr College

Gender Pronouns and Teaching
University of Waterloo

Pronouns: A Resource
GLSEN

The GENDER Book
by Mel Reiff Hill and Jay Mays

The Gender Spectrum
Teaching Tolerance

Independent Ideas Blog

Instructional Coaching: 5 Principles for a Successful Practice

Georgetown Day School (DC) shares its program and what the team has learned along the way..

Read the Post

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.title
Trend Lines: The Importance of Pronouns in Lower School

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.description
"Hello, my name is Mellie Davis, and I use she/her pronouns." This is simple for me as a cisgender woman. It is not that easy for some students and faculty members who don't fall along the typical gender binary. Traditionally, teachers address students as "boys and girls" or in single-gender schools as "girls/ladies" or "boys/gentlemen."

# data[].attributes.body
Transgender and nonbinary students feel disrespected and unsafe when their teachers and/or peers do not follow their preferred pronouns or acknowledge their gender identity. “I spent an hour a day for 180 days with Mr. Kluge, watching as he avoided me and other transgender students. Mr. Kluge’s behavior made me feel alienated, upset, and dehumanized,” Katie Reilly explains a situation where a student feels uncomfortable when schools don’t accept their gender identity. This student, Aidyn, refers to their time at school where they feel terribly treated by their teacher who didn’t accept their pronouns. This is the reason why schools need to make students feel more welcome and open about their pronouns and gender identity. School is a place where you should feel safe and respected, not neglected or upset.

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.readable_text
Aidyn Sucec remembers how much better he felt toward the end of eighth grade when, after years of struggling with his identity, he told his family he was transgender. It was the spring of 2017, and Aidyn's anxiety and depression began to lift as people embraced the teenager as "him."

"My family and friends began to recognize me as who I am," Aidyn, who's now 16, said in court documents.

Before Aidyn, who was designated female at birth, started at Brownsburg High School in Brownsburg, Indiana that fall, his mother, Laura Sucec, worked with school officials to make sure his new name and gender would be logged into Brownsburg's database. She wanted to be sure teachers knew him as Aidyn and didn't use his former name-his "dead name"-when addressing him.

The school was quick to accommodate Aidyn, and with input from Sucec and other parents, it soon allowed all trans students to use bathrooms, names and pronouns aligned with their gender identity. But that change, which was meant to protect the students, was a problem for Aidyn's orchestra teacher, John Kluge. Kluge, 29, believes "it is sinful to promote transgender behavior," according to a federal lawsuit he filed in June that accuses the Brownsburg Community School Corporation (BCSC) of forcing him to resign because of his beliefs. The BCSC policies do not specifically mention bathroom use or names for trans students, but Sucec and Kluge say those changes were made during the summer of 2017.

The case is one of at least three pending against public schools in three states-Indiana, Virginia, and Ohio-by teachers who say they were disciplined for refusing to use the preferred names or pronouns of transgender students. But beyond arguing over names and pronouns, the lawsuits raise the question of whose rights take precedence when transgender students' demands for recognition and respect clash with teachers' personal beliefs. All of the teachers say they were forced to choose between keeping their jobs or acting in a way that conflicted with their religious views.

The lawsuits come in the midst of heated national battles over LGBTQ rights, which the Trump Administration has sought to curtail. In two closely watched cases before the U.S. Supreme Court, the justices in October heard arguments about whether employers have the right to fire gay and transgender people because of their sexual orientation and gender identity, or if a federal law prohibiting sex discrimination in the workplace protects the employees. The Trump Administration has filed briefs in support of the employers in those cases. It has also sought to roll back Obama-era protections for trans students and medical patients, banned trans people from serving in the military, and supported the rights of certain businesses to refuse service to gay people due to religious objections to same-sex marriage. Such actions stand in contrast to recent public opinion polling by Gallup, which shows that most Americans believe trans people should be allowed to serve openly in the military, and that gay and lesbian people should have equal access to job opportunities and the same rights as heterosexual married couples to adopt children.

The Alliance Defending Freedom (ADF), a Christian legal group known for bringing religious-freedom cases to advance conservative causes, is providing legal support to the teachers in all three lawsuits. The ADF also defended Jack Phillips, a Colorado baker who cited his Christian beliefs in refusing to bake a wedding cake for a same-sex couple in 2012; Phillips won a partial U.S. Supreme Court victory last year when the justices ruled that Colorado's Civil Rights Commission had shown religious bias in sanctioning Phillips.

"This isn't just about a pronoun, it's about what that pronoun means," Tyson Langhofer, senior counsel for the ADF, says of the school lawsuits. "No one should be forced to contradict their core beliefs just to keep a job."

Aidyn and his mother agree with Langhofer on one thing: that it's not just about a pronoun. To them, it's about much more.

"When anybody denies your child their personhood, their identity, denies them that supportive environment, they're actively harming your child," says Laura Sucec.

"I spent an hour a day for 180 days with Mr. Kluge, watching as he avoided me and other transgender students. Mr. Kluge's behavior made me feel alienated, upset, and dehumanized," Aidyn, who played the violin in Kluge's orchestra, wrote in a legal declaration in August. "It made me dread going to orchestra class each day."

While Kluge temporarily received a religious accommodation from the school district and started calling all students by their last names only, in an effort to avoid first names, Aidyn said other kids noticed Kluge's refusal to acknowledge his gender. "At one point, my stand partner asked me why Mr. Kluge wouldn't just say my name," he wrote. "I felt forced to tell him that it was because I'm transgender."

***

An estimated 150,000 teens, ages 13 to 17, identify as transgender in the United States-0.7%, the highest percentage of any age group- according to a 2017 study released by the Williams Institute at the University of California, Los Angeles, School of Law. As the number of trans students in K-12 schools grows, LGBTQ advocates are calling on schools to better support a population that is already more vulnerable than most kids to harassment, bullying and violence. Seventy five percent of trans students feel unsafe at school, according to a 2015 survey conducted by GLSEN, an organization that advocates for LGBTQ rights in schools. Half of the trans students surveyed said they were prevented from using names or pronouns that align with their gender identity, and 65% said they had been verbally harassed at school. A quarter of trans students said they'd been physically harassed at school, and 12% said they'd been physically assaulted.

Similarly, a survey of trans adults found that 24% said they were verbally, physically or sexually harassed in college, and 16% of those who experienced harassment said they left college because of it, according to the 2015 U.S. Transgender Survey conducted by the National Center for Transgender Equality.

There remains a patchwork of policies for trans students in school districts across the country. Some states have issued guidelines to schools, but policies differ from one district to the next.

When Sucec approached the Brownsburg district about changing Aidyn's name and gender in the school database, for instance, she learned it had no policy for accommodating trans students, even though Aidyn was not the first. Sucec says she and other parents advised school officials as they made accommodations for trans students.

This lack of clarity has sparked several court battles, usually involving students demanding the right to use the bathroom that aligns with their gender identity.

In 2008, trans actress Nicole Maines-identified in court documents at the time as Susan Doe-sued her Maine school district when it denied her permission to use the girls' bathroom at her elementary school. The case ended up in the state Supreme Court, which ruled in Maines' favor in 2014. It was the first time a state had declared it unlawful for a school to deny a transgender student access to the bathroom that aligns with their gender identity, but it hasn't stopped states from trying.

In 2017, a Pennsylvania school district settled with three transgender teens who had sued after being denied access to the bathrooms that match their identity. As part of the settlement, the school board directed all district schools to end bathroom restrictions for trans students. Last year, a federal judge in Florida ruled in favor of 17-year-old Drew Adams, who had sued his school for the right to use the boys' bathroom. "Now I can finally be like any other kid at my school, any other boy," Adams, who has openly identified as male since 2015, said in an interview with local news in 2018. The St. Johns County School Board has appealed the ruling to a federal appeals court. In August, a nearly five-year battle waged by Gavin Grimm of Virginia finally ended when a federal judge ruled that his school had discriminated against Grimm, a transgender male student, when it denied him access to the boys' bathroom when he was 15.

But schools also face obstacles when they attempt to accommodate transgender students. In October, a Georgia school district that had adopted a transgender-friendly bathroom policy - in line with the ruling in Adams' case - reversed the decision in the face of death threats, vandalism and other forms of harassment.

Though many of the most high-profile cases involving the rights of trans students have taken place at the K-12 level, tensions arise in higher education as well. There are an estimated 139,000 trans college students in the U.S., Reuters reported in August. And polling shows younger generations are more familiar with people who are transgender or nonbinary. More than a third of Gen Zers (born after 1996) say they personally know someone who uses gender-neutral pronouns, according to a Pew Research Center report published this year. The American Society of Plastic Surgeons says gender confirmation surgeries in the U.S. have nearly tripled in recent years, from 3,200 in 2016 to 9,576 in 2018. But many colleges still lack gender-neutral bathrooms and housing or non-discrimination policies that protect trans students. In August, a mental health study published in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine found that transgender, gender nonconforming and nonbinary college students are two to four times more likely to experience mental health problems than their peers. The lead author of the study, Boston University School of Public Health assistant professor Sarah Ketchen Lipson, concluded, "there has never been a more important time for colleges and universities to take action to protect and support trans, genderqueer, and nonbinary students on campus."

But the lawsuits from Kluge and other teachers concern challenges whose solutions aren't as simple as changing signage on bathroom doors, or switching names in a database.

LGBTQ advocates and mental health experts say the evidence is clear: transgender students do better when they're not made to feel awkward or isolated from their classmates. "The overwhelming body of evidence about every single student in every classroom in this country is that when you treat a student with respect, when you pronounce their name correctly, when you use the right name, when you refer to them in terms that are appropriate to who they are-no matter who that student is-they do better," says Eliza Byard, executive director of GLSEN. "They feel like they belong in their classroom, they are more likely to listen to you as an educator, and they have the simple ability to participate fully in school life."

But attorneys on the opposite side say tolerance should be a "two-way street" and schools' actions amount to a "heckler's veto" of religious and free-speech rights. Many conservative Christians argue that gender is determined at birth as either male or female and "it cannot be changed," per Kluge's lawsuit.

"We see a growing hostility in the culture to religious liberty, and so this is another example of that. And we want to fight those examples hard with all the tools we have," says Curt Smith, chairman of the conservative Indiana Family Institute, which is supporting Kluge's lawsuit. "The larger goal is to have the government realize it cannot coerce speech."

***

From an early age, Aidyn Sucec said he struggled with his identity, "knowing that there was something different about me." He'd been treated for depression and anxiety since second grade, but it wasn't until he turned 14 and came out as transgender that Aidyn said his mental and emotional health improved. He changed his name to Aidyn on his birth certificate and social security card, and friends and relatives accepted his new identity.

"My family and friends refer to me as Aidyn," he said in his legal declaration. "Indeed, everybody in my life now refers to me as Aidyn."

But that wasn't the case in Kluge's orchestra class.

When Kluge, who had been teaching at Brownsburg since 2014, first raised religious objections with the Brownsburg superintendent to the school's transgender-friendly policies, his lawsuit says he was given an "ultimatum." He could use students' transgender names, resign or be fired. Kluge suggested he be allowed to address all students by their last names only, as an athletic coach would, and the district approved. But five months later, the lawsuit says, officials told him that the plan was creating tension in the classroom and later said some students "were offended by his use of last names."

Kluge's beliefs were clear to Aidyn. Throughout the year, Aidyn said Kluge refused to use his name. Instead, he said Kluge would nod or wave at him in class to get his attention, or call him by his surname. When Kluge was out one day, Aidyn said the substitute teacher referred to him in front of the entire class by his former "dead name," something Aidyn described as "intensely humiliating and traumatizing."

The school principal, Bret Daghe, told Kluge he had until the end of the school year, May 2018, to resign. (Daghe did not respond to a request for comment.) According to the lawsuit, Kluge submitted a "conditional" letter of resignation on April 30, 2018, then changed his mind and sent a letter on May 25 rescinding his resignation. But Kluge says that same day, the school locked him out of buildings and internet access and posted his job.

The mandate that Kluge use trans students' names and pronouns "left Mr. Kluge with an untenable choice of maintaining his employment while violating his sincerely-held religious beliefs on an almost daily basis, or losing his employment-the chief financial means of support for his family," his lawsuit said. At the time he lost his job, Kluge was earning a salary of $46,250, plus an additional stipend of $5,200 a year for being the school's music director.

(The Brownsburg Community School Corporation and the individual defendants, who have asked the court to dismiss Kluge's case, declined to comment on pending litigation.)

In Virginia, high school French teacher Peter Vlaming similarly accused the West Point School Board of violating his rights to free speech and free exercise of religion under state law, when he was fired in December 2018 for refusing to use male pronouns when referring to a trans male student. "He wasn't fired for something he said. He was fired for what he didn't say," his lawsuit filed on Sept. 30 says.

According to Vlaming, he'd agreed to use the student's preferred first name in class but refused to use male pronouns and was accused of using female pronouns in the student's absence. In one incident, the lawsuit said, he slipped up and called out, "Don't let her hit the wall!" during a class exercise in which he feared the student, who was wearing virtual reality goggles, could be harmed. According to the lawsuit, the trans student, who has not been publicly identified, approached him after class and said, "Mr. Vlaming, you may have your religion, but you need to respect who I am."

West Point Public Schools said Vlaming, 47, was disciplined for violating a school district policy prohibiting discrimination on the basis of gender identity. The school board and staff "acted within the law and division policy, and we deny any liability to Mr. Vlaming" and plan to "vigorously defend against any claims," the school district said in a statement.

Philosophy professor Nicholas Meriwether's lawsuit filed in federal court in November 2018 also claims that his religious beliefs were violated by Shawnee State University in Portsmouth, Ohio. Meriwether-who typically uses "sir" or "ma'am" and "Mr." or "Ms." when addressing students in class-was investigated and had a warning placed in his personnel file after he refused to use female pronouns to address a trans female student. University officials said Meriwether's treatment of the student created a "hostile environment" and violated the school's nondiscrimination policy. In September, a federal magistrate judge recommended that the suit be dismissed, refuting Meriwether's First Amendment claims. His attorneys filed an objection, and a U.S. District judge will issue a final ruling.

The university declined to comment on specifics of the case while litigation is ongoing but defended its actions. "We are confident, though, that as details about the case come to light, it will become clear that efforts were made by Shawnee State to both respect our faculty member's deep rooted religious beliefs and our student's right to equal treatment in the classroom," a university spokesperson said in an email.

Langhofer, of the Alliance Defending Freedom, says Vlaming has not been able to find another teaching job since being fired, while Meriwether, 62, remains a tenured professor at Shawnee State. Kluge has also been unable to find a job in another school and is working as a contractor and teaching private music lessons instead, says Michael Cork, an attorney representing him.

***

Justin Driver, a Yale law professor and author of The Schoolhouse Gate: Public Education, the Supreme Court, and the Battle for the American Mind, says he would be surprised to see the teachers prevail in their suits because such a decision would conflict with the 2006 U.S. Supreme Court ruling in Garcetti v. Ceballos. That decision said a public official's free speech rights are only protected when they're acting as private citizens, not while performing official duties.

Paul Castillo, a students' rights attorney for Lambda Legal, agrees. "It is not the public square," Castillo says of classrooms. "And these students, particularly in a K-12 environment, are mandated to be there. They have no choice, and they ought not to be subjected to discrimination." Castillo is representing Indiana Youth Group, an LGBTQ advocacy organization that has filed a motion to intervene as a defendant in Kluge's lawsuit because it has an interest in the outcome and believes it can better represent the rights of trans students.

Driver expects lawsuits challenging the rights of transgender students to increase, and he thinks the Supreme Court is likely to take up the issue at some point. "The questions that divide American society often find their fiercest battles arising within the schoolhouse itself," Driver says. "The schoolhouse is where people on both sides of the issue feel strongest, and I think that's because what young people learn in American public schools, they carry with them for the rest of their lives."

In a speech at Notre Dame Law School in October, U.S. Attorney General William Barr called public schools "ground zero" for "attacks on religion," citing laws in New Jersey and California that require schools to include the social, political and economic contributions of LGBTQ people in the curriculum. Barr said "many feel" that curriculum is "inconsistent with traditional Christian teaching."

Byard, of GLSEN, says attitudes like that are all the more reason teachers should respect the identity of trans students. Given the level of polarization in the country over issues of gender and identity, Byard says, trans students "are being used as a political football by people at the highest levels of government." With studies showing them already at higher than average risk for depression and suicide, being caught in the middle of bitter political fights only makes things worse.

"They are in danger, and every single teacher out there is in a position to help them through the simple act of using the right name and the right pronoun every day," Byard says. "The ability to help them is entirely within their control. It is a daily act of affirmation that could save someone's life."

For Aidyn, school became intolerable after Kluge's departure turned into a controversial issue that sparked protests at a school board meeting and bullying at school. In court documents, Aidyn said several students hurled insults at him when he showed up for the start of his sophomore year in the fall of 2018. One student "called me 'the fag that got Kluge fired,'" he said.

A week into that school year, he withdrew from Brownsburg. Laura Sucec says Aidyn is now taking online classes at home through Indiana Connections Academy, a free online public school program. He's doing well, she says - earning good grades, preparing to graduate a year early, and feeling more relaxed. But she wishes he'd never had to endure the misery that led him to leave Brownsburg High.

"He's going through the process of identifying who he is as a person. That's something that everybody goes through," says Sucec. "But when somebody identifies as being transgender, that's much more difficult to go through, because that's something that not everybody understands."

Write to Katie Reilly at Katie.Reilly@time.com.

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.title
'This Isn't Just About a Pronoun.' Teachers and Trans Students Are Clashing Over Whose Rights Come First

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.description
Aidyn Sucec remembers how much better he felt toward the end of eighth grade when, after years of struggling with his identity, he told his family he was transgender. It was the spring of 2017, and Aidyn's anxiety and depression began to lift as people embraced the teenager as "him."

# data[].attributes.body
Refusing to follow someone’s pronouns can induce gender dysphoria and other mental health issues. Mx. Fuller, a nonbinary teacher in phildelphia, talks about how pronouns can make transgender and nonbinary people feel more included: “For nonbinary people — those who identify as neither exclusively male nor female-gendered terms, like honorifics, can feel invalidating and ignite gender dysphoria." Gender dysphoria is a common feeling amongst LGBTQ+ people where they feel like they don't represent their assigned gender at birth. Promblems like these can cause depression and high suicide rates amongst youth transgender and nonbinary people.

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.readable_text
When Maddie Luebbert, 25, returned after a week away from the classroom, their students were complaining about the substitute teacher.

Luebbert dismissed the student complaints at first. "My students said 'The substitute was awful.' I was like 'Yeah right, everyone says that,'" Luebbert told NBC News.

But then the students started explaining why they didn't like the substitute. "My students said to me, 'The substitute was really disrespectful. She wouldn't use your pronouns or your name.'"

Luebbert is a nonbinary, 9th grade English teacher in a Philadelphia public school. Luebbert uses they/them pronouns and has their students address them with honorific Mx. - a gender-neutral alternative to the gendered Mr., Ms., Miss and Mrs. that most of us grew up using for our teachers.

Mx., generally pronounced as "mix," has grown in popularity over the past few years, as more people outwardly and openly identify as transgender, gender-nonconforming and nonbinary - and have rejected the idea that only two options, male and female, exist.

But as honorifics fade in popularity and people work to avoid gendered assumptions, schools are among the last places where Mr., Ms., Miss and Mrs. are routinely used. For trans and nonbinary educators, like Luebbert, this poses challenges, but also opportunities for learning, education and affirmation.

"I didn't like that I had to pick an honorific when I went into teaching," said Isti Fuller, a 28-year-old nonbinary high school science teacher in the Greater Sacramento Area. "But I used Ms. because it felt like it was as generic as it could get."

For nonbinary people - those who identify as neither exclusively male nor female - gendered terms, like honorifics, can feel invalidating and ignite gender dysphoria. "It's jarring when I hear someone call me Ms.," Fuller said.

When Fuller's mother found an article about the honorific "Mx.," they decided to adopt the term. For Fuller, using Mx. is "a lot more comfortable."

Tai Tran, a 24-year-old transgender 7th grade math and science teacher in Richmond, California, feels similarly. Describing her first year as a teacher, Tran told NBC News that "Going by Mr. Tran was not a very good year for me." Switching to Mx., she said, "made me a lot happier."

"I feel like it's very validating of my own gender identity," Tran explained.

For Tran, using Mx. goes beyond feeling affirmed in the classroom. "Not only am I teaching these students that a queer educator of color is in their space and giving them a quality education, but also that it does not detract from or take away from their education at all," Tran added.

"The earliest example that we know of 'Mx.' is a 1977 article published in the United States, in an American magazine called Single Parent," Emily Brewster, an associate editor at Merriam-Webster, told NBC News.

Brewster was the editor at Merriam-Webster who submitted Mx. to be added to the dictionary.

"I noticed that this word was being used, so I did some research and determined it was eligible for entry," she said.

Merriam-Webster added Mx. to its unabridged dictionary in 2016 and to its website in 2017. Brewster explained that words are added if they're being used, and if they've been published in edited text.

"All the content of our dictionary is based on evidence of words in use," she said. "Mx. met our criteria." To her, adding it was a no-brainer.

Although Mx.'s formal addition to the English language was largely uneventful, all the teachers who spoke to NBC News about using Mx. described challenges like invalidation and difficulties with implementation when they adopted the term.

When Beck Watt, a 25-year-old nonbinary music teacher at a middle school in Winnipeg, Canada, told their school over the summer they were going to start using Mx., they asked that all their information be updated in the school systems by the time the new semester began.

"I started my job in September and found that nothing had been done," Watt told NBC News. "My name was wrong on all my paperwork, my students were getting information about me that's saying I'm 'Ms. Watt.' I was like, 'That's not my name. That's not gonna work.'"

In addition to issues getting their schools to align their personal information with their identity, many of the teachers who use Mx. described problems with misgendering - when someone calls a person by pronouns or honorifics different than the ones that person prefers - from colleagues.

"My students just take me at face value and haven't had any questions," Watt added. "They just go with it, but it's been a bit more challenging with staff."

Shani Kartanė, a 28-year-old nonbinary high school English teacher in an industrial Bay Area suburb, agreed, telling NBC News, "I would say it's worse with my colleagues than it is with my students."

Many teachers told stories of leading workshops and sessions among faculty to get their colleagues up to speed on pronouns and gender diversity. While some colleagues made it clear they were allies, others were resistant.

"Not everyone jumped on board," Marvin Shelton, a 25-year-old, black nonbinary middle school teacher in the New York City metro area, said. Shelton starting using Mx. and they/them pronouns in the beginning of the spring semester.

"It wasn't until June, the end of the school year, that people really started to be like, 'Oh, Marvin is seriously going by they/them and Mx.'"

For Kartanė, the challenges came with self-doubt. "I had moments where I thought: I'm too much work, I'm asking too much of my colleagues and students, and that as a teacher I'm there to serve, and part of serving others is not always putting yourself first."

Shelton felt similarly. "There is a population at my school who think I'm a joke, who joke about my honorifics or the way I carry my body," they told NBC News. "When there are images in society that say who you are as a person seems to be made up, people think, 'Why should I change what I know to respect who you are?,'" Shelton said.

One student-teacher in the Southeast, who asked not to be named for fear of retribution and professional impediments, told NBC News, "My professors told me indirectly that my gender and sexuality were a 'political agenda' I needed to leave at home."

When this teacher casually corrected people about their pronouns, and requested not to be called "Miss," they were labeled "aggressive." They felt like they had to choose between being themselves and being a teacher. Eventually, they left their student-teaching program, graduating with a different degree instead.

This story is not unique to the student-teacher who spoke to NBC News. In 2017, a public elementary school in Florida removed a transgender teacher from their classroom who asked student to address them with "Mx." and use "they/them" pronouns. The school succumbed to parent complaints about the teacher's request, and transferred the transgender teacher to a classroom with adults.

However, Watt, Kartanė and Shelton emphasized they were grateful to be in schools where such extreme reactions have never occurred, and they were able to eventually integrate their identity into the classroom.

"In order to serve my students, I have to be who I am, and if I'm not, then I can't serve," Kartanė said.

Shelton said they were able to tune out the noise and focus on what matters.

"I went into education because it's a holistic job. I'm not just in the classroom to teach grammar and writing and reading," Shelton said. Teaching people about their identity, they added, is 'part of the job.'"

"I'm an educator," Shelton stressed.

Harper Keenan, a trans educator who works in teacher education, knew firsthand the challenges that face trans, gender-nonconforming and nonbinary educators. After a trans friend of his died by suicide, Keenan was determined to help his own community. Then a Ph.D. student in education, he knew the education world well, so he founded the Trans Educators Network.

"What I hoped to do was try to find someway to help my community, trans people, feel less isolated in a world that is often isolating for us," he told NBC News.

Keenan started posting on Facebook and emailing different education listservs. "I thought I would maybe find 20 people," he said. "It just ballooned quite quickly, and now, three years later, there's more than 400 people in the network, and we have members all over North America, from Hawaii to Toronto."

The network has been a crucial place of support for educators who often lack trans colleagues, and are the first one at their school to come out.

For Watt, this rings especially true. "A lot of my friends are teachers, I know a lot of people who understand the job. But I don't know a lot of people who understand, 'Yes it's a tough job, but it's also tough to also be fighting everyday for your identity to be recognized.'"

The network provides a space to talk about the issues specific to trans, gender-nonconforming and nonbinary educators.

"I would say with some frequency folks in the network ask around about what is a non-gendered title that they can use." Keenan said. "Folks have all different ideas, but Mx. is one that regularly comes up as a potential option."

Some people opt for students to say "teacher" before their last name, others come up with completely new honorifics, but in the network, discussions around Mx., according to Keenan, "happen frequently."

While it's difficult to measure how many people use "Mx.," Keenan suspects knowledge of the term is regionally dependent. "In places where there is a strongly visible trans, nonbinary and nonconforming community, people are more likely to have some awareness of and familiarity with the term," he said.

Despite the challenges, nearly every teacher who spoke to NBC News said they were glad they decided to start using Mx.

"A lot of my students have been really passionate about advocating for me and my pronouns," Luebbert said. "It feels like there's a really healthy back and forth of empathy and respect. We might not know everything about each other, but we're going to explain ourselves in a way that's fair and that we both understand."

Shelton added that using Mx. has helped them find "a lot of energy and comfort in the classroom," telling NBC News that "as a black, queer, first generation teacher, I offer a lot of representation to my students."

Tran agrees. "I'm making it clear I'm open, I'm out, and it's nothing to ever be ashamed of. I am owning my own narrative so that others cannot fill in the gaps for me."

For Fuller, the answer is simpler: "Mostly, it's just my name," they said. "I appreciate that I'm in a place where it doesn't draw attention."
FOLLOW NBC OUT ON TWITTER, FACEBOOK AND INSTAGRAM

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.title
Ms., Mr., or Mx.? Nonbinary teachers embrace gender-neutral honorific

# data[].attributes.attachment_link.description
When Maddie Luebbert, 25, returned after a week away from the classroom, their students were complaining about the substitute teacher. Luebbert dismissed the student complaints at first. "My students said 'The substitute was awful.' I was like 'Yeah right, everyone says that,'" Luebbert told NBC News.

# data[].attributes.body
Claim: Schools should make an effort to make nonbinary/transgender students feel welcome by using their preferred pronouns because it helps students feel safe and respected.

# data[].attributes.body
Claim: Schools should be required to follow students’ and teachers’ preferred pronouns because it creates an inviting environment for people who don’t conform to their assigned gender at birth.

# data[].attributes.body
Claim: Members of a school community should address transgender and nonbinary students/classmates by their preferred pronouns because doing so helps to create an inclusive and supportive environment for the person.

# data[].attributes.headline
Should members of a school community be required to learn/follow students’ pronouns?

# data[].attributes.subject
Should members of a school community be required to learn/follow students’ pronouns?

# data[].attributes.body
Background information: A lot of children/teens are becoming more and more curious about gender norms and different usages of pronouns. As students are becoming more comfortable with their identities, should schools be required to follow their preferred pronouns?