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Hui Qi's reflection

Despite the many changes and restrictions, I am thankful that our church was committed to having the conference, and fellow brothers and sisters from home and around the world enthusiastically joined the online conference. We had every valid reason to cancel the conference and it would be deemed as reasonable and appropriate but our church went above and beyond to ensure that the conference carried on, so that many lives could encounter God and be transformed in his presence. This spirit of being unwaveringly committed to God and the plans entrusted by Him spoke to me the most through the conference. Circumstances may change and the future may be uncertain but we serve a God who is good and only has good thoughts and plans for his people. When we remain faithful to God and His plans and choose to be committed to His work and not be thwarted by other factors, God can and will bring goodness out of the situation. In the end, we not only had our conference but we were able to attend the conference with the global churches and had a glimpse of how God is working in their midst. It was such an amazing and humbling experience to be surrounded by brothers and sisters from all over the world; to hear of their proclamation of God while dealing with the impact of covid-19; to witness first hand how the gospel unite the nations and every tongue profess the glory of God. Because of such commitment to God and His plans, we not only had our conference but we had a global one. Sometimes, I tend to give up under certain circumstances, which may be valid and reasonable. But I think God is showing me the greater reward of preservering in spite of the circumstances. Instead of fixing my focus on the circumstances or myself, I can choose to fill my mind and heart with God and His promises, knowing that he is good beyond measures and only His plans will prevail to eternity.

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This year's conference was truly a reminder of how I serve a faithful and loving God. Pastor Benny Ho's sermon on lessons that we can gain from times of crises really resonated with me, as I felt that the whole COVID situation gave me opportunities to look back on how I was living my life, and how I wanted to live my life with God at the center. My pre-COVID life had been moving at such a fast pace that I was slowly losing hold of my priorities, and I guess God thought it was time to give me a nudge back in the right direction. Like what Pastor Benny said, the whole COVID situation truly gave me clarity, revealed fault lines and helped me to reorder my priorities. All in all, conference was a time of looking back and reflecting on God's grace in my life.

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Admittedly, I didn't have specific expectations for conference, but was looking forward to that time of refreshment and deliberation set aside to spend time with God amidst all the busyness of everyday life. I particularly enjoyed the lab session - Christ in Culture - on the different aspects of how Christ and Culture comes together, and it was an insightful portrayal and accurate reflection of our modern society today and how Christians should respond - with love and attitude of serving others despite the differences. The conference was a time of realignment for me, to remember, lean on His purpose and understanding, and not my own.

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I went in with an expectant heart on wanting to put behind my past, by any means necessary. I'm glad I got the answer from this conference that I do not have to do this on my own, but with God and follow His footsteps. Also, I can really see how God has prepared us and the church for a season like this where live-streaming is the new normal, and that we have been blessed to be part of this call to use technology to continue help spreading the Gospel to every corner of the earth.

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The first session of Pivot Conference reminded me that we serve a God who is an abundant God and as Christ-followers, we are to shift from a scarcity mentality to an abundance mentality. And it is indeed true when I partner with God in all things, I find His peace, providence, assurance even in the midst of Chaos. The second session helped me to reflect upon the possible fault lines that I had as a follower of Christ. I realise that i did had a lack of a holy desire even though outwardly i may be obeying Jesus and doing the Christian things. I repented and ask the Lord to help me to grow to yearn for more of Him and less of me. Ever since then, God helped me to start each day with a prayer, with a desire to want to be in His presence even as WFH continues. As I exercise the habit of beginning each day with a prayer, I realise that my days were so much light-hearted and meaningful than the past WFH days. The best days are indeed ahead of us and not behind us.

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I was thankful to be involved in the Hope Indo missions team where we welcomed the Indonesian delegates who were joining the conference together. The orphanage in Batam I was liaising with however did not join in the zoom meeting and subsequently messaged to inform that they were having issues with connection. I called the pastor’s wife to check if they were able to view the conference and they were indeed having problems as the video was too large for their internet to support. It was minutes away from the start of the conference and they had invited 20 over people from their church to join them but the video was not loading! Thankfully, with the help of another brother and sister, they managed to resolve the issue and could view the conference! The incident reminded me that even as we may not be able to gather physically in a big event, it is already a great privilege that we have good internet connection and can worship comfortably in our homes in Singapore. We ought not to forget such blessings or take it for granted but treasure it. It is powerful to remember that God is continually doing His work all over the world even during such a time as this.

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As we celebrated Hope's 30th anniversary last week, I can't help but feel nostalgia. I started in Hope when we could still have church camps in Malaysia then we moved on to Conference setting in Singapore. Being part of the HopeKids ministry back then, I remember that we will always look forward to the last day of conference cos that's when the children will also attend the High Praise segment. High Praise always brings our community together. As a single, post conference, we will always head somewhere to chill with our Caregroup, talk late into the night and many days after. After conference, our Lifegroup often feel closer, feels refreshed.

Now, married with kids, without a physical place for conference, it feels very tiring just thinking that conference is on an online platform at home. Thus, I can't say I was absolutely looking forward to conference. At the same time, emotions at home leading up to the conference was also not the most ideal for me. I was feeling very unsettled and I didn't even feel like sitting down hearing the conference or be engaged.

However, I chose to obey after settling the kids. When I obeyed, sat down faithfully, the Lord just broke me. Through Ps Benny, Ps Jeff, video segments, etc. I found myself tearing and crying and I was just back to the basics - God loves me. He loves me so I can love Him. I am so thankful to the Lord for bringing me (& family) through so many different hurdles in life. He is the God of my past, my present and He is definitely the God of my future. He told me that the cross is ready to bear anything I am willing to give Him. Look up and He'll be there to pick me up and carry my burdens.

Also, I am grateful that Hope has a children's church. Very thankful to HopeKids for a full program for the children so I was able to be engaged in mine about 95% of the time! While #2 shared that it was lotsa fun, the older and sturdier daughter said she learnt from the Clancys on worship. It warms my heart to catch her in a moment of a worshipful posture. What would Hope Church be without our children ministry?

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The pre-conference devotions that spoke to me most was day 1 where it reminded me nothing in this world is permanent - be it the great Persian kingdom in the past or the tech giant empires in the present. It's certainly a stark reminder that we ought to be fascinated by what will last through the ages. As usual, I did not have the discipline to fast before the conference even though I tried initially so that I could hear more from God. Hence, it's surely an area that I could get someone to spur me on the next time round. During the conference, I was especially touched and moved by the last session - both by the stories session and the message by PJ about remembrance on how far God has brought us in our church and my life. Somehow, I felt prompted to start my prayer group in NEA again (since we can now do via Skype) as it's something I find it purposeful to do, and have just texted my colleagues to ask for their thoughts. God has been faithful to me in my work and my life and I want to honour God and steward my resources correctly as well.

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I got the opportunity to serve in the worship team at the conference during the 30th anniversary.  Never could I imagined that celebrating the church 30th anniversary could be such a quiet affair.  Everything seemed so surreal.  However, it was one of the most "celebrative" one (in the spirit) where the Lord reminded me to go back to the basics - To love God and love His people.  To disciple others by learning to put other's above myself (including my own family). To remember that our God is a God of generations.  He was faithful, and He remains faithful until today.  I am humbled.  I can't help but be thankful to see God's hands upon the church.  Indeed, God uses ordinary people to serve His purpose.  We don't have to be gifted, we just need to be willing.

Thankful for the many who planned, served and availed themselves to serve in this conference.  So much heart and hard work put in to ensure that many of us are able to be reminded, refreshed and be envisioned once again.

On a sidenote, I got to play together in the worship team with my brother for the first time after many years.  We used to serve together week in week out.  It was like a déjà vu moment for me.  It just re-affirmed God's faithfulness over our lives. My heart was full.  My spirit was filled.  Thank you Jesus!

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I was a little bit unsure of what to expect from a conference since it is the first time that we had a full online conference. However, the devotion has helped to prepare my heart for the conference. With the current situation, it’s easy for us to lose the sight of God and just go through our lives. With wfh, we can easily hides from people. However, as what it was shared in session 2, God can work the ‘bad’ things around for His purpose. As I have more time to spend time with Him, He has taught me many things. Even though the work has been quite aimless due to the constant change of restrictions, He has taught me to bring joy at my workplace and reaching out to my colleagues.

The last session has really refreshed me to be reminded of what God has done in the past to the many people in the Bible and Hope Church. God is a faithful God. It has encouraged me to renew and to go deeper in my trust to God. I am excited of what is going to do! He is the same God who has done many miracles in the Bible. We should not be afraid. We should trust Him.

I am also glad to have many people from the lifegroup are able to join the conference so that we can encourage one another in our walk with God. I pray that we will take what we learn from this conference to our daily life.

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Its been a year over since I heard the call. I remember the day I felt the warmness as though someone was hugging me tight and i felt very very safe as though no pain could hurt me any longer.

Attending the conference further enforces how I feel on my walk with God. He tells me the journey is never easy, he will keep pushing me to do his work and I want to because his relationship is what is important to me.

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The 3 things that I would like to takeaway from the conference would be to:

1. Be part of the movement to be united with Hope church to share the word of God to the world
2. Be disciplined in unlocking the treasures of the bible and loving God's word
3. Be active and relevant in LG to be part of the movement in spreading God's love and having a strong community to grow with

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During the 2 weeks of prayer and fasting period, God helped me to realign my priorities and set my focus back to Him. It was indeed a trying period when FHBL kicked in and people around us got different expectations.

I felt a bit different and not so excited as I really love face to face conference where we can mingle around and dwell in God's presence and surrounded with the immense praise and worship atmosphere.

Session 3 was very touching as I witnessed how God's goodness and faithfulness is present in our church and movement over the past 3 decades. He is always our ONE and ONLY constant who is there for us in our highs and lows.

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From my experience serving in encounter room, really affirmed that Holy Spirit is moving powerfully, we were all pleasantly stunned by the accuracy of the words given as well as the healing (physical and inner) which took place!

Personally, I felt goosebumps when Ps Jeff sat on the stairs and shared vulnerably about his feelings of being one step behind, but yet declaring his faith on the faithfulness of God which is moving and powerful. I think that persevering spirit is infectious inspiring, in that I received the impartation to press on what we are doing and have greater faith that God will magnify His name (we need not worry).

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The 2 weeks of P&F devotions have definitely helped to position my heart to receive from the conference.

It wasn’t a hyped-up emotional feeling from the conference like the big physical gatherings we had, but one where convictions were quietly re-established in my heart. From Ps Benny’s message, Im challenged to step out of my comfort zone to act on the opportunities that this season(crisis) brings to share the gospel with greater urgency.

Ps Alan’s cups’ illustration on the fullness of God in us was both impressionable& refreshing to me. I’m reminded that if I truly know God is with me & in me, it shifts me from scarcity to abundance mentality. This means I can really give & surrender myself fully for the work of the Lord, knowing that His grace will abound in me to fulfil His purposes in my life.

Session 3 was definitely a highlight where I was deeply moved in seeing God’s faithfulness over our church these years, not just locally but globally. It showed me the importance of remembering where we come from, else we forget & begin to lose heart and focus of the journey that God wants to bring us on.  I'm both humbled & inspired by Ps Jeff’s vulnerable sharing about his challenges in this pandemic and that simple prayer that he made in surrender to God.  Indeed, we can let go and let Him lead us because God will magnify His own name.

I was serving in online Encounter Room & 2 prayees had asked for prophetic words. It was an exercise of faith for me to be His mouthpiece. The first prayee confirmed that the word was timely for the season she was in.  Though the second person also requested a prophetic word, God had other plans for her. Through a few specific questions that I was prompted to ask, the prayee revealed that she had gone through a few losses in the past year- 2 family members & her job.  She broke down & I realised what God wanted to bring to her was inner healing/restoration instead. She felt a sense of release in her heart after the ministering time & I also encouraged her to be connected to a community as she was a new visitor to one of our church’s LGs.