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Time has run out!  - on padlet, I mean.

Take a moment to reflect on what you now need help with.

Tomorrow bring an essay that you are currently writing and you can apply the same rubric for your introduction.

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Tell him monse and I will also tell him the eriks new favorite class is english! ha, ha

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yeah, he always says that "a strong essay begins with a strong thesis----and I am going to tell mr murphy you said this.

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Noooooooooo! j/k

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Excellent point, there is no shame in admitting that your teacher is saying something for a reason.  I will also email Mr. Murphy and tell him how you all did a great job with evaluating one component of this essay.  ;-)

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ha ha-----i guess that is why he has us begin with writing the thesis first before we write anything else.  now i get it

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yeah, he always says that "a strong essay begins with a strong thesis----and I am going to tell mr murphy you said this.

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I hate to admit it but my english teacher is right.

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Wow!  look at the thinking process and evolution of simply the thesis statement.

You all have not had a chance to discuss the rest of the introduction.   But that is ok.  What does this tell us about the thesis statement?

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ok.   How about-
all of society suffered because the plague did not descriminate with the rich or poor,
you know cuz every persons life was affected in one way or another because of this disease killing everyone.  well not everyone but many

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ooooooo no she didnt!  so how would you fix it.

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Yup I see her point sorry erik

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Sorry erik but i am gonna to have to say that your first supporting reason is still kinda plain

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o now each supporting reason can belong to one of the prides categories.
1 social-
2 econimic
3  religious
I mean if we stick to the thesus that monse and erik have been writting

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yes!  maybe we can put your idea with topic of religion.  Cuz you needed a priest for a funeral, right?  idk

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the 3rd reason can be that
the way peopled were burried changed or

religous ritutuals were forgotten-what do ya think?

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Stop looking at my screen Monse j/k

If i were to rewrite this thesis I would begin it the way monse did  and select the negative side.  Right now i cant think of a positive reason for any disease but

The Black Death had negative effect in Europe because it
1.  killed many people
2- economy suffered because there were less people to work
3??  I got to think of a 3rd reason

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Yes!!! that is what i was going to say next.  The supporting reasons are all bogus....I mean weak.

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i agree with erik because the writer should have said what in or about society was negative?  But i mean if the person writing this paper cant makeup there mind about what side to argue- how can they prove it?

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plus the writer does not state specifically the supporting reasonsThey only write ....."because of society , religion and economy".

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I would have  selected the negative side of the arguement.  But not both the negative and positive
something like- The effects of the Black Death were negative because.

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The person does not stick to one side of the argument.

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How can you pick both sides of the arguemnet its like they should make up their mind

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- Good connection Gisell- I know that you have not covered the topic in your History Class yet.

Try to focus on what the writer includes in the intro.  even if you do not know about the topic you can determine if the thesis, for example, is well written.

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I did not get what this essay was about

but then i  remembered I saw something about the plague on tv.   yeah but still I was still confused by this person’s writing.

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besides all of the grammar, yes the thesis is bad
it is all wrong

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I agree with Monse
the writer does not stick to one side

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What proof can you provide, for your rating Monseratt?

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I rated the introduction 1- below basic for the Focus grade