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8. Love anyway.    Even if you’re stubborn or moody or judgmental, I will love you anyway. And when I’m stubborn, moody, and judgmental I’ll try to do the same for myself. I’ll try to rise above petty thoughts and sweeping generalizations and keep sight of who you and I really are: good people who are doing our best to navigate a sometimes-painful world.

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8. Love anyway.    Even if you’re stubborn or moody or judgmental, I will love you anyway. And when I’m stubborn, moody, and judgmental I’ll try to do the same for myself. I’ll try to rise above petty thoughts and sweeping generalizations and keep sight of who you and I really are: good people who are doing our best to navigate a sometimes-painful world.

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7. Give freely.   I will give my love, support, understanding, and well wishes; I’ll give things new and old that I think will be helpful. If there’s something you need that I no longer do, I’ll send it with a note that reads, “I thought you could put this to good use. And if not, sorry for sending you clutter!”

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7. Give freely.   I will give my love, support, understanding, and well wishes; I’ll give things new and old that I think will be helpful. If there’s something you need that I no longer do, I’ll send it with a note that reads, “I thought you could put this to good use. And if not, sorry for sending you clutter!”

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5. Appreciate vocally.   I will let you know that I admire how you always stick up for the little guy and love how you make everyone laugh. I will compliment you on your passions, your parenting, and how you exude peace because you’re awesome and you should know it.

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5. Appreciate vocally.   I will let you know that I admire how you always stick up for the little guy and love how you make everyone laugh. I will compliment you on your passions, your parenting, and how you exude peace because you’re awesome and you should know it.

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6. Forgive often.   I will take every perceived slight or offense and put it through my mental shredder before I go to sleep each night. And if I can’t let it go, perhaps because it’s too big to simply discard, I’ll tell you how I feel and what I need so we can work through it together.

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6. Forgive often.   I will take every perceived slight or offense and put it through my mental shredder before I go to sleep each night. And if I can’t let it go, perhaps because it’s too big to simply discard, I’ll tell you how I feel and what I need so we can work through it together.

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4. Accept fully.  I will see your quirks and edges and shortcomings and peccadillos and will accept them all as crucial parts of the complete package that is you.

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4. Accept fully.  I will see your quirks and edges and shortcomings and peccadillos and will accept them all as crucial parts of the complete package that is you.

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3. Speak truthfully.   Even when it feels awkward and uncomfortable, I will share what’s true for me. I won’t exclude the messy parts, no matter how tempting it may be to try to appear perfect. The jig is up—I’m not. Not even close! And neither are you. Let’s be beautiful messes together.

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3. Speak truthfully.   Even when it feels awkward and uncomfortable, I will share what’s true for me. I won’t exclude the messy parts, no matter how tempting it may be to try to appear perfect. The jig is up—I’m not. Not even close! And neither are you. Let’s be beautiful messes together.

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2. Listen deeply.   Instead of plotting what I’m going to say next, or collecting mental buckets of sage advice, I can’t wait to dole out, I will listen completely, with the primary goals of understanding and being there.

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2. Listen deeply.   Instead of plotting what I’m going to say next, or collecting mental buckets of sage advice, I can’t wait to dole out, I will listen completely, with the primary goals of understanding and being there.

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1. Be present.   I will put down my phone and focus entirely on the person in front of me. My texts and emails will be there later. The person in front of me won’t.

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1. Be present.   I will put down my phone and focus entirely on the person in front of me. My texts and emails will be there later. The person in front of me won’t.

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You’ve got to dance like there’s nobody watching, Love like you’ll never be hurt, Sing like there’s nobody listening, And live like its heaven on earth - William W. Purkey

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You’ve got to dance like there’s nobody watching, Love like you’ll never be hurt, Sing like there’s nobody listening, And live like its heaven on earth - William W. Purkey