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Image #6, blog #2

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Image #5, blog #2

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Image #4, blog #2

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The book I will be writing after neglecting this blog for the past 2 months Is called “strange the dreamer” By Laini Taylor (image #4). I’ll try to be light on spoilers since you claim to have never read it, though they are kind of inevitable. Off we go. So this book is about this kid, and he’s a monk. He really hates being a monk, but he gets stories from this old bed ridden guy because he brings him his food and attends to him. This kid, Named “Lazlo” after a mute monk, his last name being “strange” because he was deathly gray when they found him, his favorite story is one about a lost city across the desert.  It’s this marvelous city, With lapis lazuli streets, colorful birds everywhere and hundreds of shining gold domes on rooftops. The streets are kept marvelously clean so that the woman, who wear their hair down to floor, don’t get it dirty, and people leave free cake on windowsills. Children run around on banisters that run from building to building, and marvelous reptiles named “styvagators” who’s blood offers immortality. Immense warriors, called “Tizerkane”, who wear scorpions in cages on their belt, as it’s venom offers inhuman strength, ride on sparkling silver moose called “spectrals” who’s antlers are worth more than gold. The merchants from said city would ride in on camels and go home with nothing but their supplies and phat stax of gold. All in all, it’s the perfect city. Anyways, some magical force swallows the name into oblivion while Lazlo’s playing Tizerkane in an orchard, and replaces it with a new name, Weep. It never comes back. So, then this kid is sent to the library to deliver a thing, but then he gets so involved in the books that the library keeps him. Fast forward some 15 years, and he’s a librarian now.   People call him “strange the Dreamer” (hence the name of the book) because he’s absolutely absorbed in fairy tales and obsessed with the lost city of weep. Anyways, while the city is in an economic depression, one of the fairy tales from Weep contains the secret to creating “Azoth”, which can turn anything into gold. He gives it to this absolute (image #5)wad of a royal alchemist, who becomes the hero and saves the land, until a thing happens. I won’t go any further, read the book. Alright, so now it’s time for inner thought. 400*1.5= 600 additional words! Yay! Alright, I’ll try to draw this out as much as I possibly can, since I only really touched on the first few chapters.  Laini Taylor’s skill in world building is absolutely amazing. She leaves very few plot holes, explains some things but acts as if others are absolutely normal, and integrates the whole thing with a completely realistic society. Every character, despite their actual importance, seems important and is absolutely memorable, even if the names are way too difficult to remember. Obviously some are a bit cliché, like the dumb, drunk demolitionist (image #6), but everyone else is absolutely unique and interesting. And don’t get me started on her actual writing style. Every description creates a vivid image, and even the slightly unnecessary events are interesting and help add to the overall fantasy feeling of the universe. Yay, we still have a whole damn 450 words to go. kill me. Hmm, what else. Ah yes, inevitable spoilers! I nearly forgot about those, silly me. Now would be a great time to stop reading this dumpster fire and go read the book before you go ahead. There’re quite a few plot holes in this book that I feel like I want to discuss. First, how on earth did the people of weep not realize the fact that the giant plumb tree up in the citadel should have died ages ago, with no soil or space for roots to grow. Also, did they not realize how often it rained, but only over the citadel? Or the way that clouds just kinda got sucked into the courtyard? Next up, the loss of the pulley system up to the citadel. In the book, they say that they forgot about it while partying after they killed the gods, and that it just kinda slipped and fell. There are two directions this could go, and they are both sub-par at best. The first idea adds a layer of depth, though is still a bit lazy. It is that maybe Minya, a cowering 6-year-old girl caring for 4 infants, I might remind you, mustered up the courage to go knock it down. I don’t think this is the case though. I think that the fall of the pulley system was way too coincidental. They needed some excuse for not going up even though the gods were able to bring them up. I do, however like the way that the fact that “gods” needed pulley systems to rape kids humanizes them. Almost done, I promise. I don’t like the way that Drave gets wasted. Sure, it’s satisfying as all hell, but I don’t think that he would have been selected to go on the trip to weep if he was so incompetent to get caught in his own blast and get squished by a rock. I feel that it would not only be more satisfying, AND make sense if he were executed publicly for being responsible for the destruction of the entire north side of weep and the citadel falling on the city. And now for the deus ex Machina at the end, though, ironically it’s a god who needed it. I think it was way too convenient for Lazlo to be a Godspawn, and especially one with control over the mesarthium. Lastly, the ending. I absolutely despise the way that the author ruined an almost perfect ending. I would have been content with Lazlo becoming all powerful, his girlfriend dying and the city being in shambles as an ending. But noOoOoOo. You just HAD to have Minya hold Sarai hostage in order to milk another book. Not everything needs a sequel, and from now on, I’m going to pretend it had the perfect ending, and that there is no 2nd book.

‘tis all.

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Found in post #1

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Found in post #1

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Found in post #1

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now then. first blog post. here we go. so, this book, it's called "THE RULE OF THR3"(Image #1). Honestly, the title itself isn't that good. I mean, adding a 3 at the end of "three", isn't that clever. anyways, the book is (so far) about this kid and old spy guy after computers somehow manage to all just die simultaneously. but, only the computers, other electronics work just fine. the dude is in the school, and everything just goes down. the emergency lights still work, and so does his old, uncomputerized car. Along with a painstakingly long explanation, that's how we figure out it's not an EMP. the dude coms out and he finds his crush walking with her JOCK boyfriend conveniently named CHAD. I wonder what was going through the author's mind when he thought that naming a character that the protagonist hates for dating his crush Chad (Image #2). Very poor choice on his part. The protagonist then drives her to a farm and goes home. at his home, he meets and old retired government dude, old government dude needs chlorine tablets, blah bah blah. While the guys are buying chlorine tablets, they get threatened by a mob. old dude then threatens them with a gun. he later claims he has no idea how to use it (Image #3). Anyways, I just realized that the assignment says that only about 2 lines should be summary. 🤬. I also really hope that profanity filter works. so, that means I need about 67 lines worth of thoughts. 🤬. again, I really hope the filter works. along with thought's I've already inserted, I need 59 more lines. let's go. The book has a very interesting concept. the idea of society breaking down enough for disorder, but not enough for anarchy is surprisingly refreshing as opposed to everybody dying. What I do not like; however, is that the author is not good at writing. It's like George Lucas. he Has some good ideas but is a terrible story teller. descriptions and revelations are painstakingly long, and he teats the reader as though he's an idiot. He also overuses many tropes, clichés and all-around horrible ideas. I am only about 60 pages in, and I can already tell that the protagonist is going to either steal his crush from chad, or chad is going to die when society inevitably collapses completely, and the protagonist coerces her into falling for him. Eric Walters tries way too hard to add unnecessary details into the story. In fact, he tries so hard that he forgets about many necessary details. He also overexplains that the old man that Adam(protagonist) is traveling with is super cool, and mysterious. he doesn't just SHOW that he is. he TELLS US. WITH WORDS. that may not seem all too bad, but just read this excerpt from page 36: "There was a matter-of-fact tone to Herb's voice that made him sound scary. His voice was so calm and cool hat I could almost feel the chill.", and this one from page "...Then he was a pretty good actor back there...Or maybe he was acting right now." The author seems like a neckbeard who watched too much anime. It's a plain story, is vomit inducing writing and I will promptly find a new book on Monday. That is all.

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