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July 21st 1861
I don't have much time to continue writing these journal entries but I had to take note of what I saw. I was assigned to participate in the First Battle of Bull run because they needed soldiers and I was young and able, we began marching towards the south to take positions for an oncoming battle but we were ambushed by the confederates on the way to our stations. It was gruesome, no one was prepared and many of us died. We had to engage in battle right away, by our army camp. Thankfully medics were a little ways away but still not everyone could be saved. I cannot say I am in the best condition but I made it out and that is all that matters, and if I were badly hurt the doctors would find out my gender and I would be sent back to the North and be possibly arrested. I am glad that I got to experience what it felt like to fight for what I believe in, and I think that overall, this has changed me for the better.

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June 13th 1861
I have been at the plantation for a while now and I'm starting to really hate the way that they treat slaves. If no one is going to do anything about it, I need to find a way to oppose it....... oh, I know! I will dress up as a man and join the army! Like my role model Clara Barton, who "Frequently risked her life throughout the conflict while aiding the sick and wounded."(Women at war) Even though she wasn't a soldier, her ideals inspired me to make my decision. It seemed like the only choice that would make the biggest impact.

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Watching hundreds of people die, seeing the injustices towards slaves, and having to behave like a man, were all ways that the civil war shaped my life, because I had to act like a different person in order to be able to to take someone's life.

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July 10th 1861
Today I had to find the nearest army recruiter in Pennsylvania. No one seemed to notice my disguise and I was very careful to try to match the mens movements. Remembering to talk in a low voice, I told the recruiter my name and that I was 19 years old. Luckily, I didn't need to lie about my age and height since I was over 18 and above 5 feet tall. After that, a doctor checked that I had enough teeth so that I could open the gunpowder.... now I have to go, I need to report back to the colonel.

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June 27th 1861
Today my husband left for the war, and now I could start my plan. Disguising as a man was relatively easy. "If someone wore pants and had short hair, everyone assumed the person was a man." (I'll pass for your comrade). Unfortunately I had to cut my long hair, but I was easily able to exchange my long dresses and corsets for trousers from my Sam's old clothes.

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Women's Expectations in the 1850's-1860'

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Women's Expectations in the 1850's-1860'

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A woman in my time was expected to be modest, obedient, and focused on our families and homes. Women who joined the war were presented with new opportunities such as adventure, excitement, and voting.

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May 15th 1861
My father had business in the south, and I decided to go with him. We are staying at a plantation in Tennessee. But upon arriving here, I noticed how horribly enslaved people are treated. I was not necessarily raised on the idea that "Slavery was immoral and should be abolished," (I'll pass for your comrade). But no one seemed to be doing anything about these issues that were so obvious to me either. I don't agree with this behavior but I'll have to withstand it for now.

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"More than four hundred women are known to have gone to war as actual soldiers. Many more may have served without being identified." (The Country needed Men pg 43). Many women felt that by staying home they weren't doing enough for their cause, and so joined the army even though they weren't allowed, which shows how strongly they wanted their side to win.

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I decided to join the army, but I was a woman and if I was caught I'd be sentenced to imprisonment. "Life as a soldier presented many new opportunities for her, and some of them turned out to be voting, adventure and excitement." (I'll pass as your comrade). Thus, I assumed the alias of Kevin Rogers and participated in the First battle of bull run. There I fought to resolve to issue of enslavement.

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I was born in the north in the state of Pennsylvania, 1842. At age 19 I visited Tennessee in the south. There I saw firsthand the cruel acts of a slave owner, saw the slaves that were beaten and overworked. I returned home to Pennsylvania and  decided then that I would do my best to abolish the horrific act of slavery. I married Samuel Corbell, but after only a few months of being together he had to go off to fight in the war.

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Blashfield, Jean F. Women at the Front: Their Changing Roles in the Civil War. Franklin Watts, 1997

Silvey, Anita. I'll Pass for Your Comrade: Women Soldiers in the Civil War. Clarion Books, 2008

Stanchak,John. Civil War. New York, Doring Kinderstey,2000

PICTURE CITATIONS:

“Albert Cashier.” I Wanted to Do My Part: Women in the War, PBS, www.pbs.org/mercy-street/blogs/mercy-street-revealed/i-wanted-to-do-my-part-women-as-soldiers-in-civil-war-america/

“Sarah Edmonds.” PBS, www.pbs.org/mercy-street/blogs/mercy-street-revealed/i-wanted-to-do-my-part-women-as-soldiers-in-civil-war-america/.