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5 Keys to Social and Emotional Learning Success

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As we all adjust to the current situation brought on by the COVID-19 pandemic, it is important that we create safe, supportive, and engaging spaces for learning at home. Think about these four elements-your readiness and your child's experience of safety, support, and engagement-like building a house:
As you read through these resources, remember: Every family is different. Everyone's individual circumstances are different. Everyone brings their unique set of strengths to address life's challenges. The information we are sharing here is designed to be flexible and adapted in the ways that work best for you.

Begin with a solid foundation: make sure that YOU are ready to support your child's academic, social, and emotional learning. First, take care of yourself and make sure you have the capacity to support your child. You are the foundation and everything you do to take care of yourself will strengthen that foundation.

How You Can Be Ready to Support Your Child (PDF)
Cómo estar listos para apoyar a su niño (PDF)

Next, create a space that is emotionally safe and supportive-just as walls and a roof provide safety and support for a house. Children cannot learn when they are anxious or worried because these emotions trigger the stress response system and that affects working memory, attention, and concentration. Make sure that your child is learning in an emotionally safe space so that your child can tap into the parts of their brain that are responsible for learning.

How You Can Create an Emotionally Safe Space (PDF)
Cómo crear un espacio seguro desde el punto de vista emocional (PDF)

Safety goes hand-in-hand with a supportive atmosphere. This means providing the warmth, empathy, and encouragement your child needs as they learn new things in a new setting (at home). As we get used to all the newness-new settings, new technology (or lack thereof), and new experiences-children need reassurance and they need to know that you are there to help them.

How You Can Create a Supportive Space for Learning (Part 1: Emotional Support, PDF)
Cómo crear un espacio que propicie el aprendizaje (Primera parte: Apoyo emocional, PDF)

How You Can Create a Supportive Space for Learning (Part 2: Learning Support, PDF)
Cómo crear un espacio que propicie el aprendizaje (Segunda parte: Apoyo en el aprendizaje, PDF)

Finally, add in the doors and windows that make learning fun because this will help them stay engaged in their learning. Children are wired to learn and explore, and they often do this by being introduced to new and interesting things. As your child adapts to learning at home, you can encourage your child to use their natural curiosity and creativity by helping them be aware of their own world so what they learn is relevant and meaningful to them.

How You Can Help Your Child Actively Engage in Learning (PDF)
Cómo ayudarle al niño a participar de manera activa en el aprendizaje (PDF)

Remember that each of these elements are really important when building positive conditions for learning at home. The positive conditions that you create will give your child what he or she needs to succeed. In fact, positive conditions for learning will not only help your child with learning at home right now, it will also help everyone in your home no matter what is going on in the world around us.

In the coming weeks, we will continue to add new information, strategies, things to look for (in other words, what you can expect as normal behavior during these stressful times), and resources that have more information. We will also describe developmental differences to be aware of (for example, what this looks like for a younger child compared to a teenager). This information will help you create safe, supportive, and engaging spaces for learning at home, both now and in the future.

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Building Positive Conditions for Learning at Home: Strategies and Resources for Families and Caregivers

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As we all adjust to the current situation brought on by the COVID-19 pandemic, it is important that we create a safe, supportive, and engaging spaces for learning at home. In the coming weeks, we will continue to add new information, strategies, things to look for, and resources that have more information.

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This is a great parenting resource!

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A site for parents actively supporting kids' social and emotional development

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Build an Emotionally Safe Environment at Home

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En Espanol

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Please complete this Google Form to gain FREE access to our Inner Explorer account

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Instructions for downloading the Inner Explorer App

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Instructions for downloading the Inner Explorer App

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How Inner Explorer Supports 5 SEL Competencies

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How Inner Explorer Supports 5 SEL Competencies

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Use this strategy to distract and de-escalate an upset child

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Coping Skill: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 Grounding Technique

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Inside: Why a calm down corner is effective and how to create the perfect calm down corner for you kids. (Great for kids who has ADHD, autism, SPD, ODD, or are simply spirited or emotional)
Have you ever wanted to shut out the entire world and just take a few minutes of complete you time?

Maybe you feel this way every day.

It's okay.

Well, guess what?

Your kids feel this way too.

But here's the problem...

...they just don't know it.

Well, it turns out you can dramatically help your child stay balanced, calm and avoid over-stimulation by creating a calm down space.

A calm down corner is a safe space for angry, upset, frazzled, and/or overstimulated children to go to calm down.

And in today's post, I'm going to show you exactly how to create your own calm down corner.

Toddlers often have little or next to no emotional regulation.

This means:

WE need to monitor their stimulation levels.

Kids are a bit like a kettle. They get warm, then hotter, then start bubbling, and then all chaos breaks loose and the whistling top blows off.

A calm down corner is a place for kids to do just what it says - calm down.

Pause.

Reset.

Kids can go to this safe space, pick a non-stimulatory activity and bring their excitement levels back down to normal. (Green zone)

My strong-willed and emotional child feels everything VERY intensely. It's disheartening that there is absolutely nothing I can do to help him regain control once he's spiraled into his emotional abyss.

We created a calm down corner for him, it blocks out stimulation, noise, and most of all me trying to control his behavior.

It's been HUGE for us.

I call it a cozy corner, but it's also referred to as a Quiet Corner, Calm Down Space, Sensory Tent or Cool Down Spot.

A calm down corner is a place where angry or upset children can go to calm down. Grab these helpful printable calm down corner printables.

What is a calm down corner?

A calm down corner can also be used instead of time-outs.

Without venturing into the effectiveness of time-outs debate - if time-outs don't work for your child, try this instead.

Often when kids are misbehaving it's because they are overstimulated. Going to this space is not a punishment, it's an effective tool to help your child curb this behavior.

Your child can learn that there are different ways of acting.

It's not a punishment - it's actually a happy place.

A calm down corner is also an extremely effective place for angry or upset children to go.

Let me explain:

When kids are upset or angry you'd have better luck talking to the wind.

You won't get any results.

In fact:

When kids are angry, talking sometimes makes matters worse.
It adds agitation and even more stimulation to an already out of control child.
Sometimes, as much as I want to talk lessons into my son, I need to zip it and calmly walk him in silence to his calm down corner, and then -

LEAVE HIM BE.

Kids can then take the time they need, calm down, and rejoin the family when they are ready.
Note: It's better to encourage our child to go to their calm down corner before they erupt into a tantrum or offsetting behavior.
If it's too late, you might need to employ whatever strategy you have in place to get your child out of the red zone, and then guide him or her to their corner.

Example of How to Use Your Calm Down Corner

When my child erupts, I get down on his level, look him in the eye and say quietly but firmly: "You are not allowed to hit mommy." (Or whatever behaviour occurred).

I then walk/or carry him to his calming space.

Sometimes this involves him fully erupting, even throwing things (he has high functioning autism so emotional outbursts can be a problem for us).

When he's calm or quiet, I ask him to apologize. Then, I encourage him to play in his calming space, and ask if he'd like me to join him.

I've spent days where we are in a continuous cycle of correcting behavior this way. But in time, I see big results from this technique.

At this point, if your child is receptive you can talk about what happened.

A great way to begin the discussion is to use a calm down corner kit which you can learn more about here.

Your child can point to what they did wrong and point to the emotion that they were feeling. The next poster gives some useful suggestions for how to calm down, and also suggestions for how they can better handle the situation next time.
For example:
* Asking for help
* Taking ten deep breaths
* Knowing when to take a break

And the best part:

You haven't yelled - you don't feel guilty - and your child has started to learn life-long valuable skills of logical thinking instead of emotional reaction.

Hooray.

Check out our life-saving calm down posters available now!

Picking the Space

You could carve out a corner in a play room, in their bedroom, in the stairwell cubby, or in a corner.

Anywhere really.

The most important thing is that the child will be away from the hustle and bustle of the rest of the family.

My calm down corner is in the landing in the basement.

I have a bench with my calm down posters, baskets with coloring utensils, some fidget toys ( these tangle ones are my favorite) and books. Of course I've put one of my son's favorite teddy's there, and our mindful kids cards game.

I'll get to more of what to include in your space below.
But know that it's important to make this space safe.
Consider the wall colors. Beige's and neutral colors are calming. Red's and oranges can invoke more anxiety or anger.

When to use a Calm down Corner

* During a tantrum
* When a child is aggressive
* When a child is fighting with siblings
* When a child is in the silly zone
* When your child is overstimulated, angry or frustrated.
* When a child isn't listening
* When a child needs a screen time break
If your child isn't having a meltdown or anger outburst, but you can see them getting overwhelmed or excitable - a great idea is to invite them into the space.
Ask them if they want to blow bubbles, color a picture, or read a book.

What's the bottom line?

A calm down corner isn't solely about reacting to bad behavior.

What's in your Calm Down Corner?

Everyone's corner will look a little different depending on their child's interest.

But basically:

Soft and Cuddly

Make it soft and cuddly. Build the foundation of your corner with soft and weighted items. Layer the floor with blankets and pillows.

I like these cute pillows:

Consider a bean bag chair or a play tent.

I really like this bean bag chair that you can lay down in, or this one is cute for a little boy.

And one of my favorite kids decorating items is a kids tent! Kids love tents and it looks cool too.

Don't forget to include your child's favorite stuffy.

Visual sights might include a soft glow lamp, hung lights, heck, why not this awesome jelly fish lamp.
A kaleidoscope perhaps?
These are just some ideas - you can fill your corner with absolutely anything you like. Use your imagination.

Sensory Activities:

Many children are soothed by sensory activities. We have what we call our angry shaker. I went to the dollar store bought a tube style container, put beads in it and my son shakes it when he's angry.

You could add sand, slime, or beads to your corner.

Perhaps your child would like to rip construction paper to take out their anger. Or color really hard.

An oil diffiuser is a great idea!. Essential oils are amazing for calming and relaxing the nervous system. I recommend lavender.

Calming Activities

I made one of the calm-down glitter jars that are all over Pinterest. Fun!

Putting a snow globe in your space is also a great idea. In our kid's mindfulness printable Mighty Mindful Kids, we have a specific snow globe exercise for you to try (along with 40 other calming activities).

Breathing cards are another great way to calm an upset child. Mighty Mindful Kids also has a number of beginner breathing exercises. We also have an epic post here on 10 of the best breathing exercises for kids.
The goal is to shift the mindset from being upset to well - anything else really.
Certain activities bring your child into the present moment. That's why teaching your kids mindfulness is very important and you can read here just WHY it is SO important.

Think breathing, counting, playing eye spy.

And mindfulness teaches kids that they don't have to be controlled by their emotions any longer.

Engaging Activities:

Consider a board game and also paper and markers for drawing or scribbling. Your child may like small stuffed animals, a coloring book, or toy cars.

Fidget toys:

Squishy balls, water wiggles, fidget spinners, stress balls.

Noise-reducing headphones to block out sounds that are overwhelming. Headphones are deep pressure and calming in themselves. And soft, mellow music is a great idea.

Calm Down Cards

Calm down cards are a great tool to give kids ideas and strategies to calm down themselves. Check out these calm down cards and this calm down kit here.

I put these cards in a basket (there are 40 to choose from), and when I notice my son is becoming agitated, or entering the dreaded red zone, I suggest we pick three cards from the basket. The rule is that we must do whatever the card says.

They are quick calm down solutions, but work brilliantly.
Jog on the spot for one minute, walk like a dog across the floor, breathe like a bear. The exercises are fun and quickly distract your child from whatever big emotion is brewing.
After we are done our three exercises, I then guide my son to his calm down corner for a sensory break.
Here's another example of how I use the cards:
My son has sensory issues, and when we are putting on our snow gear (cringe) we often run into trouble.

He starts ramping up. And if you have a child that has sensory issues, you will know EXACTLY what I mean.

First, his socks don't feel right, then his pants aren't the right length, his shirt sleeves went too far up his coat.

It snowballs, and snowballs until everything is wrong, and a meltdown follows.

Well at the first sign of this fussing - it's calm down card time. Before the meltdown hits.

I distract him from everything that feels wrong with his pants and socks. Sometimes this distraction is enough to allow us to carry on without a meltdown.

I won't lie, sometimes it's only a temporary distraction and the meltdown is not avoidable.

But, the bottom line?

Much of the time it works.

Print this set (I use card stock paper), laminate them if you can, and shuffle through the 40 cards. It's fun and kid-tested to help them cool off.

The best part?

After consistently using these cards, kids will begin to employ these techniques on their own. Habit building, skill building, repetition.

The Best Calm Down Corner Posters for Your Calming Space

I've got three options (at three different price points) for visuals and posters for you to add to your space.

I would recommend any of these three sets. The first set is a digital small letter size set of 4, inexpensive. The second set is also digital and includes 14 different posters with different size options, the design and function of this set is truly amazing. The third set comes printed and delivered for a higher price point, but is outstanding if you want to splurge, or don't want to be bothered with printing yourself.

1. Calm Down Posters - Set of 4

The first set includes 5 calm down printables that you can print out on letter-size paper and place in your corner. You hang this set on the wall as I did, or you can simply use them as worksheets on the table. This set is great if you don't have a lot of room and/or don't want to spend a lot of money.

2. Calm Down Corner Toolkit From Etsy - By Ivory Emblem

This calm down corner toolkit is amazing.

This is the description from the maker: Print multiple copies for a memory game or Go Fish or use the Feelings Check-In cards and sort them into Danger Zone, Caution Zone, Safe Zone, and Chill Zone. Help your kids to recognize when they are elevated and learn how to get back to the "Safe Zone" by using Calm Down Choices.
Check em out here!
3. Mindfulmazing's Chill Out Hideout

The next set is a much more comprehensive kit.

It provides many emotional regulation activities for kids and includes some fun posters (with different size options)
This kit is currently under construction and will be back soon!
There is also a comprehensive guide and even cutouts for your my feelings check-in.
For price and usefulness, this is my best A+ recommendation.
What next? When they are calm.

Now it's time for the lesson.

First: If your child has had a meltdown, don't make them feel shame.

They are likely upset already.

Young kids, kids on the spectrum, kids with ADHD, and kids with sensory processing disorder often struggle with emotional regulation. And it's our job to help them learn the skills to better handle the situation, not make them feel shameful.

However, we do need to be firm that certain behaviors aren't acceptable.I start with our calm down posters and my son points to how he was feeling, then we move on to whatever action arose from that feeling, and finally, we discuss how he could have handled the situation differently.

We often role-play the scene back, and this means each taking turns to be the angry child, teach them how to notice signs of anger, and how to react differently.

This is when you let your kids know that their behavior wasn't acceptable, why it wasn't acceptable, and teach the skills they need to do better the next time such a situation arises.

These are skills that take a while to learn, so understand young brains are still growing and developing, young kids are unable to control their emotions. With time and practice, you begin to notice a big difference.

Common questions:

My child is in a rage! She won't use the calm down corner.

Like I said above, if your child has erupted into full blown meltdown, you might need to use whatever strategy works to diffuse your child back down to a level lower. They can calm slightly, and then calm the rest of the way down in their safe space.

Wait, Isn't This a Reward for Bad Behavior?

Now:

Sometimes when I'm overwhelmed I need to hide in my closet for a few minutes so I don't explode. This is a coping skill for a normal and acceptable human emotion.

We are actually teaching our kids coping skills. They are not always mature enough to be calm and reasonable, and toddlers often can't do it.

Period.
Their brains are growing and learning and they need to be taught effective coping strategies. Not always punished for things out of their control.
As much as you might think they are, kids aren't trying to drive you crazy, test your limits or demand control, they don't have bad intentions, and they just want to be loved.

Some kids are lacking in the skills for coping. They need our help, guidance and most of all love.

Love will never drive bad behavior. I have an emotionally charged/anxious child, so I am familiar with how difficult it can be to help him regulate his body, mind, and emotions.

If you have a child like mine, you will understand that we can't punish them for their struggles. He needs help. I'm helping him.
And that's where my calm down corner enters the picture.
My son can sneak off to his own space, rejuvenate, refocus, wind down. But most of all we are learning how to process difficult emotions.

I truly hope you have great success with your own calm down corner.
I hope you love these idea's for your calming space. I'd love to see any pictures of your child's space below or hear any ideas or comments.
Don't forget to save this article for later reference.

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How To Create The Perfect Calm Down Corner For Your Spirited Child

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Well it turns out you can dramatically help your child stay balanced, calm and avoid over-stimulation by creating a calm down space. A calm down corner is a safe space for angry, upset, frazzled, overstimulated children to go to calm down. And in today's post, I'm going to show you exactly how to create your own calm down corner.

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Use these questions to spark discussions with your child.

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SEL Read Aloud Questions to Spark Discussion

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Strategies for Setting Behavior Expectations at Home

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Is your child overly critical of themselves if they make a mistake? Do you notice that they have a hard time staying positive if the task is hard?

At Enrichment Therapy and Learning Center (ETLC) we utilize materials from the Social Thinking Curriculum, specifically teaching through "Inner Coach and Inner Critic" by Michelle Garcia Winner.

Your "Inner Coach" refers to the positive self-talk that you have with yourself when you are succeeding. Your "Inner Critic" is the negative self-talk that is more likely to come out if you've made a mistake or working on something that you feel is difficult. First, describe to your child that he or she uses self-talk. Ask your child to consider what they would say to themselves if they reach for something in a hot oven. Usual responses would be, "It's hot," "Be careful," or "Get a hot pad." Explain that these are things they may think in their head, but not necessarily think aloud, so we call it self-talk. Tell your child that sometimes self-talk takes a negative tone, which they can call their "inner critic," and that they will learn to replace it with more positive self- talk that they can call their "inner coach."

Below are a few examples of things your inner coach & your inner critic might say. Read a variety of things your child might say and have them sort which things are what their inner coach would say and which things their inner critic would say. You could set up containers with labels that say "Inner Coach"and "Inner Critic."

1.) You make a mistake when you are writing something. You say:

o Ugh. I'm terrible at writing.

o That's okay! I have an eraser.

2.) You are feeling happybut get a paper cut. You say:

o I will just get a band aid, it doesn't hurt too bad.

o OH NO! this is terrible my hand is never going to stop hurting.

3.) I can't remember what we just read in reading group. You say:

o I have a terrible memory, I can't remember anything!

o Stay positive, my friends and teachers will help me remember.

4.) Your brother or sister accidentally broke one of your favorite toys. You say:

o I hate them, they ruin everything.

o It's okay, they didn't mean to do it. I'm sure it can be fixed.

5.) You slipped on ice getting out of the car. You say:

o This is going to be a horrible day and nothing will get better.

o No big deal, at least I am not hurt. I can move on.

6.) You are at school and feeling tired. You say:

o I'm so tired I cant do anything. I am too tired.

o I'm going to keep working as hard as I can, when I get home I can nap!

Brainstorm the following questions with your child, as this can be a great time for your child to reflect on self-talk. It's important to note that self-talk looks different on each child, so identifying things your child might think or say is critical.It's important to also discuss with your child how the inner coach & inner critic makes them feel. When they use their inner coach during a feeling of success, they feel even more successful. However, if they use their inner critic while they are already struggling it will exacerbate the problem.
See if your child can come up with a situation that happens to them!
* Write what your inner coach would say:

* Write what your inner critic would say:

Now that your child understand this concept, try using it when your child's inner coach OR inner critic appears. For example, if your child is working on a difficult math problem AND they are remaining positive, you could tell your child "Wow! I like how you are using your inner coach to keep positive." However, if you see your child is becoming discouraged with the problem ask them if they are using their inner coach or their inner critic? Have them think about what their inner coach might say in that situation. It's important to emphasize how using your inner coach helps us be successful and remain positive even when things seem hard. Be sure to check out my blog about big problems vs. little problems as well as my blog about emotional reaction size before teaching about inner coach vs inner critic.

Sarah Sitzmann is a speech language pathologist at Enrichment Therapy and Learning Center. ETLC has locations in the Iowa City, IA area and Des Moines, IA area. We provide individual speech language therapy and tutoring as well as offer a unique group, the Language Enrichment Academic Program (LEAP). At Enrichment Therapy and Learning Center our passion is to help kids achieve effective communication skills and gain academic success. Contact us for more information on how we can help your child succeed.

info@enrichmenttherapies.com

1210 Jordan Street, Suite 2A
North Liberty, IA 52317
319-626-2553

2570 106th Street, Suite E
Urbandale, IA 50322
515-419-4270

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At Enrichment Therapy and Learning Center (ETLC) we utilize materials from the Social Thinking Curriculum, specifically teaching through "Inner Coach and Inner Critic" by Michelle Garcia Winner. Your "Inner Coach" refers to the positive self-talk that you have with yourself when you are succeeding.

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Reactions should match the size of the problem.

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The coronavirus crisis is tough on all families. But for single parents, having to suddenly manage kids whose schools and playgrounds are closed and whose caregivers can no longer come to work can be especially overwhelming.

Click here to see all resources related to the coronavirus crisis.

Getting through the actual day-to-day of life under quarantine - not to mention juggling working from home or dealing with the fallout from sudden unemployment - is stressful enough. Add to that the isolation from other adults in your social network, and the task of single parenting can feel insurmountable.

There's no magic bullet that will make living through this crisis easy. But we've put together some advice from our experts to help support single parents during this difficult time. In particular, we're focusing on tips for reaching out to find help (which is crucial to your mental health), balancing work and time with the kids (which can feel impossible) and handling difficult behavior (which is to be expected).

Start with acceptance

Acceptance might sound absurd in the face of such a challenging situation, but think of it this way: Accepting the situation you're in doesn't mean you have to like it. Rachel Busman, PsyD, a clinical psychologist at the Child Mind Institute, recommends a mindfulness concept called "radical acceptance," which means that you accept what is happening in the moment without judgment, rather than fighting what you're experiencing. It also means accepting the feelings you have - including things like anger and frustration. When you're stuck in a bad situation, check in with yourself. What is - and isn't - out of your control? Once you've acknowledged what you can't control, you'll be able move forward to improve what you can control. Radical acceptance could enable you to:

Acknowledge that right now, you are in survival mode. Be kind to yourself, and remember that though it may feel lonely, you are not alone. Everyone is going through this in one way or another. "If I read one more article about how this is a great time to reorganize my closet, I'm going to lose it," says Stephanie Lee, PsyD, a clinical psychologist at the Child Mind Institute. "I think we want to dispel the myth that this is a good time to work on things. This is a time to survive and get by and that's okay."

Set the parenting bar lower. Accept that there are going to be some days when if you can get everybody fed and bathed and squeeze in a little activity, that is a good day. "If you can move the bar up just a little one day a week, great," says Dr. Lee. "And if it falls back down again the next day, that's okay."

Settle for less academics. It's virtually impossible to work from home and be your kid's teacher five days a week. "If you can manage to do academic work with your child three days a week instead of five, that's great," says Dr. Lee. "If you can only do two right now, that's okay too." It can also be helpful to check in with teachers when you feel comfortable doing so, since they may be able to give extra support in stressful situations or even just provide additional time to complete assignments.

Go back to basics. Try setting your priorities for the day in the morning. What has to get done? Then, maybe add what you'd like to get done. Kids - and you - need good sleep, some nutrition and ideally a bit of exercise every day. Those are the basics. That may mean going for a jog while your kid rides his scooter, but with parks and playgrounds in many places closed right now, it may mean taking a break to do ten jumping jacks or have a relay race in the hallway.

Find a few minutes a day for yourself. These days, the old cliché of "putting your mask on first" has taken on a new meaning. But the idea that if you can't help yourself, you can't help your child, stills holds true. "One minute of self-care, five minutes of self-care - that doesn't mean you go to the spa but it does mean maybe taking a walk if you can," says Dr. Busman. "Or doing a three-minute meditation." Taking small breaks throughout the day is crucial, even if it's just to stretch or drink some water.

Relax screen time limits. That doesn't mean letting your kid watch TV all day. But allowing a little extra time on the iPad or an extra hour of gaming can give you time to recharge and let everyone have a little break. Remember, these changes aren't forever - you're just adapting to an unusual situation.

Find your village

If ever there were a time to ask for help, now is that time. And it's important to model for your child that when you need help, you ask for it. When you can't rely on your usual support network, you might:

Reach out to your child's teacher or school psychologist or counselor, or to your own therapist.

Contact clergy members or other spiritual leaders in your community.

Schedule regular FaceTime dates with grandparents or your child's favorite babysitter or the other parent if they're in the picture. "Just fifteen or twenty minutes of virtual childcare may give you the time you need to take a shower or start a grocery delivery list," says Dr. Lee. "I know one grandma who does little kid yoga with her grandchild once a week." Kids can entertain each other, too - setting yours up to chat with cousins or classmates can be a way to give other parents some breathing room at the same time. Scheduling these visits around the same time every day or every week can also give both your child and you a little bit of structure and something to look forward to.

Have virtual meals with friends who live in other parts of the country and who are at home with their kids. "This may be the time to reconnect with that college friend you've lost touch with and introduce your kids to each other," Dr. Lee says.

Call to see if local libraries or the music class you used to attend with your child are offering virtual sessions. Remember that you're not limited to resources in your geographic area. If a bookstore across the country has great kids' events that are now online, this is your chance to check them out.

Make a plan for juggling work and childcare

Working from home is hard and homeschooling is hard, so putting them together can seem impossible. If you're feeling overwhelmed by the balancing act, try these strategies:

Speak with your employer if you're working from home. "Everybody working from home is working for and with someone who is also working from home," says Dr. Busman. "We are obviously concerned about our jobs, but depending on your situation, you can talk to your employer about taking some family medical leave or have a conversation about how to arrange flex time or how to consolidate work tasks during times that are going to align with what your child needs."

Use visual aids and timers to let your child know when you're available and when you need to work. For young kids, Lee suggests setting kids up with an activity they can do relatively independently and then using timers or visual "stop lights" (clipping a green piece of paper to the door when you're available, and a red one when you're not) to teach kids about boundaries. "Then you have to check in every five minutes or so, non-contingently," she says, to let them know you are there. Eventually you can move to longer durations of time.

Go easy on yourself. Like everything else about the current situation, your work life simply might not be up to its usual standards. But as long as you're staying on top of your essential day-to-day tasks, you are doing your job - even if you're usually determined to go above and beyond. Take comfort in knowing that your supervisor and colleagues are likely facing similar challenges themselves, and if you can, try to be open with them about what you're realistically able to put in at work right now.

Get ahead of behavior issues

The current situation is just as difficult for kids as it is for parents. And with everyone at home together, some conflict is unavoidable. Consider these tips for making the most of the challenges that do come up:

Avoid the temptation to intervene if you can. Having more than one kid at home can be great, on the one hand, because they can keep each other company. But being cooped up can also lead to more bickering among siblings. Carol, a lawyer and the single mom of two 11-year-old girls, has discovered the beauty of noise-cancelling headphones. "I wear them sometimes when the kids are off playing or doing chores," she says. "I have a tendency to want to get involved as soon as I hear them needing help or beginning to argue. It is helpful to me not to be able to hear them because it allows them more time to work through stuff on their own." This approach works well with teens and tweens. If you have little kids, you'll probably need to be the referee and help them work it out. But having a calm discussion about whatever the issue is rather than just yelling at them (even if that's what you really feel like doing) is likely keep things from escalating and you'll also be modeling constructive ways of dealing with conflict.

Expect some regression and tantrums. With the sudden restrictions imposed as a result of the pandemic, children have suddenly lost their bearings in the world - their friends, their school, their schedule. And it's expected that kids may be anxious and that may result in regression and acting out. The key, Dr. Lee says, is to not engage with tantrums as much as possible as long as the behavior isn't dangerous. "We want to be careful that we don't inadvertently reward kids in the middle of their tantrum with big, bold, and immediate attention, because it will inadvertently reinforce that behavior and keep it going."

Heap on the praise. On the flip side, it's crucial to "catch" your kids being good. "I'm always all about the praise and there's two kinds of praise. There's general praise and then there's labeled praise," Dr. Lee explains. "General praise is things like 'good job,' 'thank you,' 'way to go.' Labeled praise is literally telling someone what it was about their behavior you liked: 'Thank you so much for putting your plate in the sink.'"

The strategy of praising kids in this way is something Dr. Lee uses especially in her work with kids with special needs like ADHD and autism because it really helps to reinforce good behavior. But right now, with virtually all kids having to learn new routines and ways of coping, applying these praise techniques is beneficial to any kid living under quarantine.

If you let your kids know that you know they are doing the best they can, even in these deeply uncertain times, hopefully life will become a little easier for all of you. And right now, that is enough of a goal for any parent.

Figure out what does, and doesn't, work for you

When it comes to daily life during the coronavirus crisis, we're all making it up as we go along. It's not going to be the same for everyone. How you cope will depend, in part, on how old your kids are, how independent they can be and what your work situation is.

Linda, the single mom of a toddler in New York City, feels like she is drowning. For a week she and her daughter didn't get out of their pajamas. It took a while, but she says she discovered something that worked. "Art has been our saving grace." She spends hours each day letting her daughter go crazy with painting and has even been able to have some socially distanced playdates with the women from her moms' group where they meet outside and let the kids draw with sidewalk chalk.

Carol has been teleworking from home for over a month. "I've had time to figure out what works and what doesn't," she says. Carol has figured out that everyone does their best work in the morning, so that's when she sets her kids up with their schoolwork and when she tries to schedule as much of her own work as possible. In the afternoons they do chores and she takes her kids to a dirt field nearby where, she says, "they will ride their bikes in circles for two hours just to burn off steam."

Feel free to embrace whatever works for you and your kids. And if you try a strategy that's worked for someone else and find that it's not right for you, let it go. "This pandemic didn't come with a 'how-to' manual," says Dr. Lee, and remembering that can be the key to making this situation less stressful for you and your kids alike.

Click here to see all resources related to the coronavirus crisis.

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Single Parenting During the Coronavirus Crisis | Child Mind Institute

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The coronavirus crisis is tough on all families. But for single parents, having to suddenly manage kids whose schools and playgrounds are closed and whose caregivers can no longer come to work can be especially overwhelming. Click here to see all resources related to the coronavirus crisis.

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La crisis del coronavirus es muy difícil para todas las familias. Pero para las mamás y los papás solteros, que repentinamente tienen que hacerse cargo de los niños cuyas escuelas y parques infantiles están cerrados, y cuyos cuidadores ya no pueden ayudarlos, puede ser particularmente abrumador.

Los padres y madres están tratando de sobrellevar la ya de por sí estresante cuarentena, y muchos están haciendo malabarismos entre el trabajo desde casa o lidiando con las consecuencias del desempleo. Si encima agrega el aislamiento de otros adultos en su círculo social, criar a un niño solo podría parecer insuperable.

No existe una varita mágica que facilite la vida durante esta crisis. Pero hemos reunido algunos consejos de nuestros expertos para ayudar a apoyar a los padres y madres solteros en estos tiempos difíciles. En particular, nos estamos enfocando en consejos para buscar ayuda (que es clave para su salud mental), equilibrar el trabajo y el tiempo con los niños (lo que puede parecer imposible) y manejar comportamientos difíciles (lo cual es de esperarse).

Lea más artículos sobre la crisis del coronavirus aquí.

Comience con la aceptación

La aceptación puede parecer absurda frente a una situación tan desafiante, pero piense de esta manera: aceptar la situación en la que se encuentra no significa que tenga que gustarle. Rachel Busman, PsyD, psicóloga clínica del Child Mind Institute, recomienda un concepto de conciencia plena llamado "aceptación radical", lo que significa aceptar lo que está sucediendo en el momento sin juzgarlo, en lugar de luchar contra lo que está experimentando. También significa aceptar lo que siente, incluyendo cosas como la ira y la frustración. Cuando esté atrapado en una mala situación, chequee con usted mismo. ¿Qué está fuera de su control? ¿Qué está en su control? Una vez que haya reconocido lo que no puede controlar, podrá avanzar para mejorar lo que puede controlar. La aceptación radical podría permitirle lo siguiente:

Reconocer que en este momento está en modo de supervivencia. Sea amable con usted mismo y recuerde que aunque se sienta solo, no está solo. Todos están pasando por esto de una forma u otra. "Si leo un artículo más sobre cómo este es un buen momento para reorganizar mi armario, voy a enloquecer", dice Stephanie Lee, PsyD, psicóloga clínica del Child Mind Institute. "Creo que queremos disipar el mito de que este es un buen momento para trabajar en las cosas. Este es un momento para sobrellevar y sobrevivir, y eso está bien".

Bajar sus estándares de crianza. Acepte que habrá algunos días que si logra hacer que todos se alimenten y se bañen, y hacer una pequeña actividad, será un buen día. Si puede subir el estándar un poco cada semana, excelente", dice la Dra. Lee. "Y si vuelve a bajar al día siguiente, también está bien".

Conformarse con menos trabajo académico. Es prácticamente imposible trabajar desde casa y ser el maestro de sus hijos cinco días a la semana. "Si puede hacer un trabajo académico con su hijo tres días a la semana en lugar de cinco, está bien", dice la Dra. Lee. "Si sólo puede hacer dos en este momento, también está bien". Podría ser útil consultar con los maestros cuando se sienta cómodo haciéndolo, ya que pueden brindarle apoyo adicional en situaciones estresantes o simplemente darle tiempo adicional para completar las tareas.

Regresar a lo básico. Intente establecer sus prioridades para el día por la mañana. ¿Qué hay que hacer? Y tal vez quiera agregar lo que le gustaría hacer. Los niños y usted necesitan dormir bien, algo de nutrición e idealmente un poco de ejercicio todos los días. Esos son los conceptos básicos. Eso puede significar salir a correr mientras su hijo monta su patineta, pero con los parques y áreas de juego infantil cerrados en muchos lugares en este momento, esto puede significar tomar un descanso para hacer diez saltos de tijera o una carrera de relevos en el pasillo.

Encontrar unos minutos al día para usted. En estos días, el viejo cliché de "ponerse la máscara de oxígeno primero" ha adquirido un nuevo significado. Pero la idea de que si no puede ayudarse a sí mismo, no puede ayudar a su hijo, sigue siendo cierta. "Un minuto de autocuidado, cinco minutos de autocuidado, eso no significa que vaya al spa, pero si es posible, sí puede ir a dar paseo", dice la Dra. Busman. "O hacer una meditación de tres minutos". Tomar descansos pequeños durante el día es crucial, incluso si es solo para estirarse o beber un poco de agua.

Relajar los límites de tiempo de pantalla. Eso no significa dejar que su hijo vea la televisión todo el día. Podría significar tiempo extra en el iPad o una hora extra de juego para recargar y dejar que todos tengan un pequeño descanso. Recuerde, estos cambios no son para siempre: solo se están adaptando a una situación inusual.

Encuentre su comunidad

Si alguna vez hubo un momento para pedir ayuda, ahora es ese momento. Y es importante modelar para su hijo que cuando necesita ayuda, la solicita. Cuando no puede confiar en su red de apoyo habitual, usted podría:

Comunicarse con el maestro, psicólogo o consejero escolar de su hijo, o con su propio terapeuta.

Ponerse en contacto con miembros del clero u otros líderes espirituales en su comunidad.

Programar citas regulares de FaceTime con los abuelos, familiares o la niñera favorita de su hijo, o el otro padre si es parte de la vida del niño. "Quince o veinte minutos de cuidado infantil virtual pueden darle el tiempo que necesita para bañarse o comenzar una lista para entrega de comestibles", dice la Dra. Lee. "Conozco a una abuela que hace yoga para niños pequeños con su nieto una vez a la semana". Los niños también pueden entretenerse entre sí: planificar que su hijo converse con primos o compañeros de clase puede ser una forma de dar a los padres un respiro al mismo tiempo. Programar estas visitas a la misma hora todos los días o todas las semanas también pueden darles a su hijo y a usted un poco de estructura y algo que esperar.

Hacer comidas virtuales con amigos que viven en otras partes del país y que están en casa con sus hijos. "Este puede ser el momento de volver a conectar con ese amigo de la universidad con el que había perdido el contacto y presentarles a sus hijos", dice la Dra. Lee.

Llamar para ver si las bibliotecas locales o la clase de música a la que solía asistir con su hijo están ofreciendo sesiones virtuales. Recuerde que no está limitado a recursos en su localidad. Si una biblioteca al otro lado del país tiene excelentes eventos para niños que ahora están en línea, esta es su oportunidad de verlos.

Haga un plan para manejar el trabajo y el cuidado de los niños

Trabajar desde casa es difícil y la educación remota en el hogar es difícil, por lo que juntarlos puede parecer imposible. Si se siente abrumado, pruebe estas estrategias:

Hable con su empleador si está trabajando desde su casa. "Todos los que trabajan desde casa trabajan para y con alguien que también trabaja desde casa", dice la Dra. Busman. "Obviamente estamos preocupados por nuestros trabajos, pero dependiendo de su situación, puede hablar con su empleador sobre tomarse un permiso médico familiar o tener una conversación sobre cómo organizar el tiempo flexible o cómo consolidar las tareas laborales durante los tiempos que van a alinearse con lo que su hijo necesita".

Use ayudas visuales y temporizadores para informar a su hijo cuándo está disponible y cuándo necesita trabajar. Para los niños pequeños, la Dra. Lee sugiere preparar a los niños con una actividad que puedan hacer de manera relativamente independiente y luego usar temporizadores o "semáforos" visuales (recortar un trozo de papel verde en la puerta cuando esté disponible, y uno rojo cuando no lo esté) para enseñar a los niños sobre los límites. "Entonces tiene que chequear cada cinco minutos más o menos, sin contingencias", dice, para hacerles saber que usted está allí. Eventualmente, puede pasar a períodos de tiempo más largos.

No sea duro con usted mismo. Como todo lo demás sobre la situación actual, su vida laboral simplemente podría no estar a la altura de sus estándares habituales. Pero siempre y cuando se mantenga al tanto de sus tareas cotidianas esenciales, está haciendo su trabajo, incluso si generalmente está decidido a dar lo mejor de usted, sienta confort de saber que es probable que su supervisor y sus colegas se enfrenten a desafíos similares, y si puede, trate de ser abierto con ellos sobre lo que realmente puede poner en práctica en este momento.

Adelántese a los problemas de comportamiento

La situación actual es tan difícil para los niños como para los padres. Y con todos juntos en casa, algunos conflictos son inevitables. Considere estos consejos para sacar lo mejor en medio de los desafíos que surgen:

Evite la tentación de intervenir si puede. Tener más de un hijo en casa puede ser genial, por un lado, porque pueden hacerse compañía mutuamente. Pero estar encerrado también puede conducir a más disputas entre hermanos. Carol, abogada y madre soltera de dos niñas de 11 años, descubrió la belleza de los auriculares con cancelación de ruido. "Los uso a veces cuando los niños están jugando o haciendo tareas", dice ella. "Tengo la tendencia a querer involucrarme tan pronto como escucho que necesitan ayuda o comienzan a discutir. Es útil para mí no poder escucharlos porque les da más tiempo para resolverlo por su cuenta". Este enfoque funciona bien con adolescentes y preadolescentes. Si tiene niños pequeños, probablemente necesite ser el árbitro y ayudarlos a resolverlo. Pero tener una discusión tranquila sobre cualquier tema en lugar de solo gritarles (incluso si eso es lo que realmente quiere hacer) probablemente evite que las cosas se intensifiquen y también estará modelando formas constructivas de lidiar con el conflicto.

Espere alguna regresión y berrinches. Con las restricciones impuestas como resultado de la pandemia, los niños han perdido repentinamente su orientación en el mundo: sus amigos, su escuela, su horario. Y se espera que los niños puedan estar ansiosos y que eso pueda dar lugar a una regresión y malos comportamientos. La clave, dice la Dra. Lee, es no hacer berrinches tanto como sea posible mientras el comportamiento no sea peligroso. "Queremos tener cuidado de no premiar inadvertidamente a los niños en medio de su berrinche dándole mucha atención inmediatamente, porque sin querer reforzará ese comportamiento y lo mantendrá en funcionamiento".

De un montón de elogios. Por otro lado, es crucial "atrapar" a sus hijos cuando se portan bien. "Siempre me gustan los elogios y hay dos tipos de elogios. Hay elogios generales y luego hay elogios etiquetados", explica la Dra. Lee. "El elogio general es cosas como 'buen trabajo', 'gracias'','sigue así'. El elogio etiquetado literalmente es decirle a alguien sobre lo que le gustó de su comportamiento: "Muchas gracias por poner su plato en el fregadero".

La estrategia de alabar a los niños de esta manera es algo que la Dra. Lee usa especialmente en su trabajo con niños con necesidades especiales, como el TDAH y el autismo, porque realmente ayuda a reforzar el buen comportamiento. Pero en este momento, con casi todos los niños están teniendo que aprender nuevas rutinas y formas para enfrentar la situación, aplicar estas técnicas de elogio es beneficioso para cualquier niño que viva en cuarentena.

Si les deja saber a sus hijos que usted sabe que están haciendo lo mejor que pueden, incluso en estos tiempos de incertidumbre profunda, puede esperar que la vida sea un poco más fácil para todos ustedes. Y en este momento, ese es un objetivo suficiente para cualquier padre.

Determine qué funciona y qué no funciona para usted

Cuando se trata de la vida diaria durante la crisis del coronavirus, todos la estamos creando a medida que avanzamos. No va a ser lo mismo para todos. La forma en que lo haga dependerá, en parte, de la edad que tengan sus hijos, cuán independientes puedan ser y cuál sea su situación laboral.

Linda, madre soltera de un niño pequeño en la ciudad de Nueva York, siente que se está ahogando. Durante una semana, ella y su hija no se quitaron la pijama. Le tomó un tiempo, pero ella dice que descubrió algo que funcionó. "El arte ha sido nuestra salvación". Pasa horas cada día dejando que su hija se vuelva loca con la pintura e incluso han podido tener citas de juego, respetando la distancia social, con las mujeres de su grupo que se encuentran afuera y dejan que los niños dibujen con tiza en la acera.

Carol ha estado trabajando desde casa por más de un mes. "He tenido tiempo de averiguar qué funciona y qué no", dice ella. Carol ha descubierto que todos trabajan mejor por la mañana, así que es cuando prepara a sus hijos con sus tareas escolares y cuando trata de programar la mayor parte de su propio trabajo. Por las tardes hacen los quehaceres y ella lleva a sus hijos a un área verde cercana donde, dice, "andarán en bicicleta en círculos durante dos horas solo para quemar energía".

Siéntase libre de aceptar lo que funcione para usted y para sus hijos. Y si prueba una estrategia que funcionó para otra persona y descubre que no es adecuada para usted, déjela ir. "Esta pandemia no vino con un manual de instrucciones sobre "cómo hacerlo", dice la Dra. Lee, y recordar que puede ser la clave para hacer que esta situación sea menos estresante para usted y sus hijos por igual.

Lea más artículos sobre la crisis del coronavirus aquí.

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Ser padre o madre soltero en los tiempos del coronavirus | Child Mind Institute

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La crisis del coronavirus es muy difícil para todas las familias. Pero para las mamás y los papás solteros, que repentinamente tienen que hacerse cargo de los niños cuyas escuelas y parques infantiles están cerrados, y cuyos cuidadores ya no pueden ayudarlos, puede ser particularmente abrumador.

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The minute you become a parent, your focus turns to take care of your new bundle of joy. And as your child grows from an infant to a toddler and beyond, you might find it's tough to return your attention to taking care of yourself.

However, a lack of self-care can create a downward spiral. You are likely to feel stressed out and overwhelmed when you are not caring for yourself, which makes it tougher to be an empathetic and patient parent. In turn, you might feel guilty and overwhelmed-self-care may be the last thing on your mind.

Taking care of your spiritual, physical, psychological, and social needs will help you feel your best so you can be the best parent you can be. It's important to set aside a little bit of time for self-care even when you feel like you don't have a single second to devote to yourself. While there are many different self-care strategies for parents, it's important to experiment with them to figure out which strategies work best for you.

Even a quick 5-minute meditation can help you feel rejuvenated. If you are new to meditation, guided meditation might be a good option. There are many apps, websites, and audio files that can walk you through the steps of meditation.

There are also many breathing exercises that can help reduce your stress in just a couple of minutes which means that you can practice these even when you're short on time. Even though they're quick, a few deep cleansing breaths can do wonders for calming your mind and your body.

You might even decide to get your child involved in meditation. It's a great lifelong skill that can benefit both of you.

2. Spend Time in Nature

Studies have found that spending time in nature can be good for your psychological well-being. A quick walk in the park, a hike on a trail, or time spent tending a garden could help you feel rested and relaxed.

Researchers discovered that patients residing in hospital spaces with a window that overlooked green spaces healed faster than patients who weren't able to look outside. Patients without a window were then offered pictures of landscapes. Those patients began reporting reduced pain and less anxiety, indicating that landscape pictures were good for their physical and mental well-being.

You can also bring green spaces indoors with some indoor plants. Of course, it's important not to purchase tons of indoor plants if the upkeep is going to create more stress in your life.

If you live near the coast, plan a trip to the ocean. Being near the water also produces a relaxation effect. A study published in Health & Place found that looking at "blue spaces" reduced an individual's risk of depression and anxiety.

3. Listen to Music

Whether you find classical music soothing or you prefer to dance to some 80s tunes, listening to music can be a great way to take care of yourself. You don't necessarily need to set aside a special time to listen to music. Turn it on while you're feeding your little one or listen to your favorite song while you're getting ready for the day. It's a simple thing that can go a long way toward boosting your mood and helping you feel ready to tackle whatever life throws your way.

4. Join a Book Club

A book club can serve several purposes. Joining a book club that meets in person will help you have regular social interaction, it will motivate you to set aside time to read, and it can help you have something to look forward to each week. If you aren't aware of any local book clubs, contact your library. They may host book clubs or they may be able to help you find one in your community.

Online book clubs may also be an option, but they aren't always a good substitute for face-to-face interaction. Online settings may also be large and impersonal which may make you less motivated to connect.

5. Go for a Walk

Exercise can be just as good for your mind as it is for your body. Though you might not always feel like you have time to hit the gym or to engage in an intense workout, fortunately, a brisk walk can be an excellent self-care strategy.

Whether you're pushing a stroller or you're walking by yourself, get your body moving for 20 minutes. A little extra activity can help you feel energized for the rest of the day.

6. Write in a Gratitude Journal

Studies show people who keep gratitude journals sleep longer and experience higher quality sleep (something every parent could likely use). The best part is, writing in a gratitude journal only takes a few minutes of your time and it doesn't cost you any money.

Before you go to sleep, jot down three things you're thankful for. Your list might include simple things, like a sunny day, or it may include big things, like being able to get a debt paid off. Either way, simply reminding yourself of the things you have to be grateful for can help you feel good about life.

7. Engage Your Senses

It's hard to be in the moment when life is busy. Engaging your senses is a good way to relax and find a sense of inner peace. Light a scented candle, take a hot bath, listen to soothing sounds, or drink some herbal tea. Engaging one or more of your senses can be a simple but effective way to take a time out from the hustle and bustle.

8. Carve out Time to Be Alone

Some parents find the only opportunity for solitude seems to be in the restroom. It's important to give yourself a few minutes of alone time aside from bathroom breaks.

Even if it's just five minutes each day that you set aside to relax by yourself, a little solitude can help you unwind. Whether that means waiting until your child takes a nap or waiting until a friend or family member is watching your child, give yourself permission to charge your batteries with a little alone time.

9. Schedule Time With Friends or Family

Maintaining your social connections is an integral part of self-care. However, it can be difficult to find time to see friends and family, especially if the activities don't involve the kids.

If you schedule a future social activity for yourself, it gives you something to look forward to (which can be a good self-care strategy in itself). Then, actually engaging in social activity will give another boost to your psychological well-being.

10. Check the To-Do List

It may not seem like doing chores are good ways to take care of yourself. After all, you might feel like cleaning up and running errands is all you do sometimes.

On the other hand, checking something off your to-do list that has been bothering you can free up a lot of mental energy. Whether it's scheduling an appointment for yourself or finally cleaning that messy cabinet, consider doing something on your to-do list that will give you a sense of relief and a feeling of accomplishment.

You might decide to choose one task each day to tackle outside of your normal duties. You might find that getting things done, rather than letting those little things pile up, helps you maintain a sense of calm.

11. Turn Your Bedroom Into a Retreat

If your bedroom is filled with piles of clothes and clutter, you may feel more stress when you enter it. A good way to take care of yourself is to turn your bedroom into a retreat that you look forward to entering. Declutter your space, buy some comfortable sheets, and do a little redecorating. A cozy chair to read a good book in or a decluttered closet may help you to feel more relaxed.

12. Spend a Little Money on Yourself

You might find it's easy to spend money on your kids while neglecting yourself a bit. However, it's important to show your kids that you value yourself, too. Give yourself permission to spend a little time and money on yourself.

Just buying yourself a new shirt or paying to get a haircut can make you feel good. You might set aside a little bit in the budget each month to spend on yourself or perhaps you just do something nice for yourself once in a while. Either way, it's okay to treat yourself sometimes.

13. Take a Break From Electronics

Scrolling through social media, surfing the internet, and binge-watching TV might seem like a good way to relax. On the contrary, those activities can sometimes cause more stress than they relieve.

Digital devices can create a lot of pressure to be "on." Whether you feel compelled to reply to a work email late at night or you answer social media messages right before bed, your electronic habits might be taking a bigger toll on you than you realize.

A digital detox might help you reset some of your habits and it could also be good for your kids.

Methods for Digital Detox

Interestingly, research shows people who sleep without a phone in their rooms feel happier and better rested. These quick tips might be just what you need to feel more relaxed and at peace.

14. Savor Something

If you feel like you're in a rush all the time, there's a good chance you don't ever really get to savor anything. Commit to savoring something and make it a daily habit. Whether you want to savor your first cup of coffee or you decide to savor those moments when you're snuggling with your child, practice being in the moment.

15. Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness programs or simply a daily mindfulness practice can help you become more present-this is key to fully savoring what's going on right now. Rather than replay something in your mind that happened yesterday or worry about what might happen later today, savoring the moment will help you enjoy what's right in front of you now.

A Word From Verywell

Don't neglect the most basic components of self-care: eat a healthy diet, get seven to eight hours of sleep each night, and get regular exercise. Don't expect perfection when it comes to maintaining a tidy home, but do keep up on the basics-dishes, vacuuming, and laundry.

Then, integrate regular self-care strategies into your routine. Keep in mind that the times when you're thinking you don't have time to take care of yourself are likely the times when you need to practice self-care the most.

If you're experiencing a lot of stress and anxiety or you think you may be depressed, talk to your physician. You may benefit from a referral to a mental health professional. However, your doctor may want to rule out physical health problems first.

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15 Self-Care Strategies for Busy Parents

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The minute you become a parent, your focus turns to take care of your new bundle of joy. And as your child grows from an infant to a toddler and beyond, you might find it's tough to return your attention to taking care of yourself. However, a lack of self-care can create a downward spiral.

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Any time you travel on an airplane, the flight attendants announce that if the oxygen masks drop down, you should first put on your own mask, and 'then assist small children.' This is good parenting advice for life in general. Yes, our children have many needs that need to be met, and even more desires they would like you to fulfill. But in order to have the energy to care for them, you need to make sure that you're also taking care of yourself! Take a few whiffs of parenting oxygen now and then, and it will help to rejuvenate you.

Here are some tips for what to do when you're "running on empty."

Ideas for meeting your physical needs:

Exercise, on your own and as a family

Sleep (as much as you can), and nap when your child naps

Eat right: food affects mood, so try to cut down on sugars and processed foods

Get or give a massage

Cuddle, kiss, or make love with your partner

Take a hot shower, or a long bath (add a little lavender oil to increase relaxation)

Have a cup of chamomile tea or warm milk (or hot chocolate with marshmallows!)

Go for a long walk outdoors - on your own, or with your child in a sling or stroller

Ideas for meeting your emotional and social needs:

Spend time with friends

Spend time alone each day

Prioritize the activities that make you happy

Be creative / flexible about social activities you can work around your child's needs

Schedule time each day to talk to another adult

Allow yourself to cry

Find things that make you laugh

Find a way to have a weekly date with your partner

Say no to extra responsibilities

Ideas for meeting intellectual needs:

Take your child to the library, but pick up something for yourself while you're there

Listen to radio programs, audio books, or podcasts from the web while you drive, or while you work around the house

If your child is doing an art project, sit down and create your own art!

Write - stories, a blog, a personal journal - get your thoughts out on paper

Watch documentaries on TV, or on DVD from the library or Netflix

Identify a project that would be challenging and rewarding

Return to old hobbies you may not have pursued since baby's birth

Ideas for meeting spiritual needs:

Go to religious services

Meditate or pray each morning, or each evening

Do volunteer work or help out others spontaneously

Spend time outdoors

Write in a journal - reflect on your new life

Be open to inspiration and awe

Contribute to causes you believe in

Every morning when your alarm goes off, or shortly after your child wakes you, spend one minute in bed deciding what you are going to do for yourself that day. Start small - promise yourself just 15 minutes a day. You'll soon see the rewards (for yourself, and your family) of a little bit of "me time."

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Tips for meeting your physical, emotional, social and spiritual needs. You need energy to care for your kids, start by taking care of yourself!

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How to Create a Supportive Learning Environment at Home

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