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One day I took my dad’s car without his permission and when I was returning to my house I accidentally crash with a stop signal, right now he things the valet parking was

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3 months ago I was in a date with the guy I liked and we were in a restaurant and I wanted to go to the restroom so the restaurant only have 2 restroom (girls and boys) and I enter to the boys restroom and I didn't realized that but the guy I was dating realized that I enter to the boys restroom, and it was awkward because he ask me why I enter to that restroom I didnt know how to answer

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one day i bought my friend who is taurus a present, and since i don't know anything about that i mistook the sign and bought her an Aries one.
the song "Los caminos de la vida" started playing in my head.

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Once I was at school, just finishing my lunch as everyday, then a friend starts to make laugh of my other friend just because he got a 7 (i dont remember if is a 5 or 7) in a spanish test , so the guy that got a 7 was kind of sad, because it was not a difficult test , and he got 7, but there was the happy guy laughing and laughing about the 7, he was laughing so loud, that i think everyone could hear him, so he starts to do really weird things, but then the patient of my friend in not unlimited, so he got so mad , and he smash a INCREDIBLE slap on the other guy's face, trust me that, that clap sounds in all the school, almost in all Tj.So the smily guy just shut up because of the incredible slap. So if this guy hadn't laugh so much to my friend, he would'nt had a incredible slap in his face.

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I almost got caught by the police because I went out of an airport in another continent  , from a door it wasn't allowed.

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I took my dog out to a family trip, after 20 minutes that we part from the house he started to throw up

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Yesterday I went with my little sister to a circus and there was a creepy clown. Since I was little I am to scared with creepy clowns and yesterday that I saw him, I was so scared and I wanted to go home.
When the show finished, we were walking home and while I was walking I felt a strange sensation of someone behind me, so with a lot of courage I turned around and there was someone with a clown mask, so I yelled so loud and this person took off the mask and it turned out that it was my mom trying to scare me.

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Once I was eating with the person I liked ande he make me laught so hard that I sneeze and my mucus came out in front of him, it made me think "If I had used at least five napkins, this wouldn't have happened"

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Once I tought I was alone in my house, so I put some music (most of oit reggaeton and all stuff), and I was like... Pretty inspired. I was dancing all over the house, and when the music stops I decide to rest for a while. Then I realize that mom was watching the whole time and she recorded part of it.

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Once i was in the train station and we were sending our luggage to another place and I changed my boots for my rain boots that were in my suitcase and i left the padlock keys inside and I had already put the padlock, then until we arrived to the hotel i wanted to try to open my suitcase with the keys of my friend, so i went to my friend’s room for the key and i  knocked the wrong door and an old lady opened really mad, I was so embarrassed so I texted my friend so she could open the door for me because I didn’t wanted to knock the door again maybe the old lady would think i was knocking her door again, then my friend lend me the keys, i broke the zipper  of the suitcase and I opened it

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Once upon a time there was a barnacle and he was so ugly that everybody else died, the end.

Edit: thx

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Once when I was visiting my grandparents over the holidays, I stayed in their house. At 3:00 A.M I couldn't sleep and went for a glass of water. When I was walking back to my room I saw my grandparents sleeping and I just stared for a while. 20 seconds in my grandpa let our an enormous, inhuman fart and my grandma woke up, looked out the window and said: "Ohhh, that airplane has been in this area for a while!"

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I remember once in elementary school we got some pijama day (one per school year) so I was on 1st grade  and I confused the days so I went on pijama a normal day and I was really happy until I got to my classroom and I saw everybody with uniform so I didn´t even enter to class and I was outside on the floor crying and feeling dumb so like and hour later teacher went to the restroom saw me there and try to comfort me by telling me that everything would be right and that I didn´t have to feel that way so she just gave a hug an send me to class so I entered and feel really ashamed because everybody was watching me.

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The other day I was walking alone and I ran into a friend who I had not see in a while but she had a funny belly so I asked her if she was pregnant! which I shouldn't have done because it turns out she wasn't and the situation became really awkward, of course she got a little mad and we just talked a little after that and each one of us continued it's road. I don't think we talk soon...

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once i didnt have socks to where at school (im a man) and i take a pair if my moms socks that where pink and at school we where playing Soccer .Evertbody start taking there shoes and start playing no socks and Wheel a friend notice that my socks were

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once i didnt have socks to where at school (im a man) and i take a pair if my moms socks that where pink and at school we where playing Soccer .Evertbody start taking there shoes and start playing no socks and Wheel a friend notice that my socks were

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Pink he laugh at me so i ran toward him a
And kick him on the leg and when i Hit him i broke my leg 😅

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Yesterday I was asleep when I heard someone farted, I got very confused since I was in my room and I sleep alone. Then I realised my dog had just farted.

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Last weekend I went with my boyfriend to buy some stuff for his mom, but when we enter walmart, I crashed into a lady and accidentally  broke something.

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yesterday i was in my room and all of a sudden I get a notification from instagram saying that i was tagged in something, so i checked and it was a very embarrassing video of me singing at the top of my lungs for everyone to see, so then i decided to post a video of my friend doing something embarrassing as well. 

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yesterday i was in my room and all of a sudden I get a notification from instagram saying that i was tagged in something, so i checked and it was a very embarrassing video of me singing at the top of my lungs for everyone to see, so then i decided to post a video of my friend doing something embarrassing as well. 

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Last week, I bought some tickets for a baseball game and then I realized that I had put the wrong postal code, so I was pretty scary thinking If that would affect everything. I didn't tell my mom, she still doesn't know. Anyway, I think there's no problem.

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Yesterday I

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Once I went with my mom to Calimax and I thought she was distracted so I went to buy condoms and she wasn’t distracted it was really awkward

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Last week I went to Six Flags and when I entered to the park, I was looking for somewhere to eat so I decided to go Teen Titans  Tower pizza. When I finished eating, I went to the X2 and I almost vomit because the food that I ate before getting in the game. Anyways, I was having fun in the amusement park, when I met a person that I don´t like so I was so nervous so I entered to the restroom just to kill some time while the person leaves. I stayed at the restroom for about five minutes and then I come out and she was gone. 

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Last week I went to Six Flags and when I entered to the park, I was looking for somewhere to eat so I decided to go Teen Titans  Tower pizza. When I finished eating, I went to the X2 and I almost vomit because the food that I ate before getting in the game. Anyways, I was having fun in the amusement park, when I met a person that I don´t like so I was so nervous so I entered to the restroom just to kill some time while the person leaves. I stayed at the restroom for about five minutes and then I come out and she was gone. 

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Me and my friend were in Paseo one time and then my crush appeared, which was very very hot and he justs winked and smiled at me. I was dying in the inside but I just smiled back and started running to Starbucks because it was a safe place, turns out not, there was another crush of mine, which hated me and I just went to the cashier and just said "Heyy, do I know you?" and the cashier just stared at me confused and answered "Um... no..." and I said "Okay thanks" and left REALLY fast from there and into the parking lot.

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Two months ago the school organized a trip to Knotts Berry Farm. I was planning to go with my friends and as soon as I payed the ticket I was really excited, I just needed to wait two weeks. Suddenly, that day in the morning, when I was getting ready I started to feel very sick, and I couldn't go to that trip.

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In October 2017 at the Six Flags' school trip I separated from my friends to go with my others friends from another school. But then I lost my phone and I couldn't find my friends from Cetys, so I got lost too.

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On my 5th birthday me and my parents went to Disneyland as one of my birthday presents. By the end of the day I was very tiered so we got the little Disney bus that takes you to the parking... while we were there I saw a little chihuahua laying on the legs of his owner, so I got excited and I wanted to the dog, when I touched the little dog I got my hand bitten. I started crying because I got so scared.

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2 years ago I was on tinder and I got a match from my biology teacher

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Yesterday, I was at a coffee shop with my girlfriend and we were looking at my facebook page. When suddenly, pictures of me and my ex appeared. It was pretty awkward.