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Some Benefits of Pre-Marriage Counseling

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Some Benefits of Pre-Marriage Counseling

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A graduate of Concordia University with a bachelor of science in theological studies, Christopher “Chris” Hilken joined North Coast Church in Vista, California, as a teaching pastor in 2011. Christopher “Chris” Hilken also conducts counseling for engaged and married couples.

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A graduate of Concordia University with a bachelor of science in theological studies, Christopher "Chris" Hilken joined North Coast Church in Vista, California, as a teaching pastor in 2011. Christopher "Chris" Hilken also conducts counseling for engaged and married couples.

Many couples choose to engage in pre-marriage counseling in order to learn communication skills that can serve them throughout their marriages. While counseling programs vary among counselors and churches, most counselors typically guide couples in exploring topics that create the foundation for a healthy marriage, including finances, children, careers, and commitment.

By engagin g in difficult conversations before marriage, couples acquire the communication tools they need to succeed in marriage. Additionally, they can connect on a deeper level as they learn intimidate details they might not have known about their partners. Often, pre-marriage counseling covers healthy fighting ground rules. By allowing couples to practice resolving conflicts in a safe, supportive setting, counseling can create a healthy framework for addressing problems in the future.

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Some Benefits of Pre-Marriage Counseling

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A graduate of Concordia University with a bachelor of science in theological studies, Christopher "Chris" Hilken joined North Coast Church in Vista, California, as a teaching pastor in 2011. Christopher "Chris" Hilken also conducts counseling for engaged and married couples.

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What to Expect During Premarital Counseling

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What to Expect During Premarital Counseling

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A teaching pastor serving North Coast Church in Vista, California, Christopher “Chris” Hilken started ministering at 25 years of age, becoming one of the youngest pastors at the time. Alongside ministering, Chris Hilken serves as a speaker and consultant at churches nationwide and provides premarital and marriage counseling.

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A teaching pastor serving North Coast Church in Vista, California, Christopher "Chris" Hilken started ministering at 25 years of age, becoming one of the youngest pastors at the time. Alongside ministering, Chris Hilken serves as a speaker and consultant at churches nationwide and provides premarital and marriage counseling.

Premarital counseling begins with individual and coup les assessments. The counselor seeks to establish individual beliefs around issues that will come up in the marriage. Assessment methods include questionnaires, the sharing of personal life events and experiences, and underlying touchy subjects such as cultural influences and mutual family relationships. With this information, the couple can prepare for life together, solve conflicting ideologies on time, and set realistic marriage expectations.

Conflict may happen during and after the assessment. At this point, the counselor helps a person learn how to fight fair, remain open rather than defensive, and enjoy healthy and productive misunderstandings. It is also important to discuss variables that induce happiness as a couple. It is easier to open up and enjoy an honest conversation when couples still like each other than after resentment and disappointment set in.

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What to Expect During Premarital Counseling

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A teaching pastor serving North Coast Church in Vista, California, Christopher "Chris" Hilken started ministering at 25 years of age, becoming one of the youngest pastors at the time. Alongside ministering, Chris Hilken serves as a speaker and consultant at churches nationwide and provides premarital and marriage counseling.

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Three Tips for Maintaining a Healthy Marriage

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Three Tips for Maintaining a Healthy Marriage

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Christopher “Chris” Hilken is a pastor and marriage counselor in Vista, California, and a graduate of Concordia University. Besides officiating at weddings, Chris Hilken provides premarital counseling and support for couples after marriage.

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Christopher "Chris" Hilken is a pastor and marriage counselor in Vista, California, and a graduate of Concordia University. Besides officiating at weddings, Chris Hilken provides premarital counseling and support for couples after marriage. He is also a public speaker and has given talks at a number of conferences. As a premarital counselor, he also teaches about marriage best practices. Following are three tips that can help a marriage stay fresh and alive.

It is important that both spuses watch their waistline, because many wedded couples relax and forget to keep fit. Larger waistlines can lead to general ill health, and also lead to trouble in terms of sexual attraction. And obesity can be contagious. One study found that the chances of becoming obese increase by 37 percent if your partner is obese.

Practice honesty at all times, even when you feel ashamed of something you've done. For example, if you have spent beyond your budget or wasted family funds and you find yourself hiding the information from your spouse, it will be much easier to maintain their trust if the incident is disclosed honestly and promptly.

This last tip is particularly important for newlyweds. You don't want a domestic space that resembles a hotel or office where you are just passing through. Create an atmosphere where both spouses look forward to spending much of their time (and the rest of their lives) together. This means creating a home together, and not just sharing a house.

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Three Tips for Maintaining a Healthy Marriage

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Christopher "Chris" Hilken is a pastor and marriage counselor in Vista, California, and a graduate of Concordia University. Besides officiating at weddings, Chris Hilken provides premarital counseling and support for couples after marriage. He is also a public speaker and has given talks at a number of conferences.