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I took my wife fishing and she said she didn't want to go because she was on her period.
I hate that, she always wrecks my shark fishing weekend!

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There were buy two get one free picture frames, so...

I bought them and i came home to place them on the wall:

In the first one i placed my son Johnny's picture,...
In the second my daughter Melinda's picture,...
And in the third i just framed the picture that it came with.

So Johnny then walks up to me and asks, " Who is that little boy in the third frame daddy?" So I answer him with, " Oh, that was your brother Chris, but he was bad so we sent him down the river to live with the Devil.

#PARENTING JOKES

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Why did the chicken cross the road?
And more importantly when is it coming back?

IM HUNGRY

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This is the author of this site talking to my readers

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This is the author of this site talking to my readers

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I enjoy it very much when I see that people are reading my posts and I hope that some of you will send me ideas and help keep my morale up in the clouds.
This is my email:
eddiecastles13@gmail.com

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So me and two of my friends are walking down an alleyway...
when one of my friends says: Is that dog poop on the ground up there?
Then my other friend says: Well lets see.
He then picks up the brown stuff and says: Well, it looks like dog poop,... It feels like dog poop,... It smells like dog poop,... It tastes like dog poop,...
Well I guess its good we didn't step in it.

THE END

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Narrator: There were three guys at a bar...
their names were 1, 2, and 3...
1 and 2 were happy and 3 was very sad.

guy 2 says to guy 1: Why are you so happy?
guy 1 said: Because I'm having a girl!
guy 2 says: How do you know?
So guy 1 says: She was on top... so why are you happy?
guy 2 says: I'm having a boy!
guy 1 says: How do you know?
guy 2 says: Because I was on top.
And then both guy 1 and guy 2 say to guy 3: Why are you so sad?
guy 3 says: I'm having a dog!

THE END

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GUY 1: you eat 16 donuts/s

jelly donuts are gross

deez nuts got wiped on that donut

you better not eat that donut

I don’t think that is jelly

ok now, that is definitely not jelly on that donut bro

really,… you don’t want to know why you should not have ate that donut

you should really start regretting eating that donut

– oh, so you want to know why you should not have eaten that donut

do you really?

– ok fine

I will tell you why you should not have eaten that donut

this is why

that white jelly…

well, it was a jelly-like substance…

well, it wasn’t jelly at all

the action of the balls is that, my balls went and rubbed themselves on that donut that you just ate

yep, it’s true

what,... you did what?!

you scoundrel!

you pig!

why did you do that?!

is that white jelly on my donut?!

did you,…

– no, you wouldn’t,..

would you?

wait,…

you did, didn’t you?!

YOU SWAPPED THE DONUTS!!!

GUY 2: yep,... ha ha

#DONUT TROUBLE

THE END