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What was your initial reaction to this video?

From what we learned about the history of dating, what specific aspects of dating and marriage in the past do you think technology changed?

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Helen Fisher: Technology hasn't changed love. Here's why

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In our tech-driven, interconnected world, we've developed new ways and rules to court each other, but the fundamental principles of love have stayed the same, says anthropologist Helen Fisher. Our faster connections, she suggests, are actually leading to slower, more intimate relationships.

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I enjoyed watching this video because it changed my point of view on dating and technology and how they affect each other. She is right technology doesn't change who you choose to date but it does change how you find the person you are going to date. For example in today's world you can be sitting on your couch in pjs at 2 in the afternoon pick up your phone an start to talking to people on dating sites. Back in the day it wasn't like that if you wanted to find your person you had to physically get up and go out and do things it wasn't as easy as it is today.

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I really enjoyed watching this video as it was simple and educational. It was really informing and I learned a lot that I guess I already knew. I agree that technology doesn't change how love works, it only changes the speed, and the accessibility.

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I really enjoyed this video and it definitely made me think of things differently. I always felt like the reason our generation struggled more than previous generations at getting into serious relationships had everything to do with technology. Now I understand it more so slowed down our generation because of all the options we have available but it doesn't change or prevent people from actually pursuing others.

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Watching this video was very frustrating for me but it also had a lot of truth to it. Technology has changed dating over the years because it has made it so easy to meet someone new and create some kind of intimate relationship with them. It is very simple to meet new people because technology allows you to do it within seconds.

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Personally I was interested in this Ted Talk. The only thing technology changed from dating back then is you can easily date people from other parts of the world. However, technology hasn't changed the term love. You still love who you love despite technology; some people like those who are similar to them, while others like those who are opposite of them.

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The Ted Talk was very interesting and I got to learn a lot from it. She was expressing that technology has changed over the years and therefore it was so easy to meet people. On the other hand, it doesn't represent "love". Technology doesn't change people from actually pursuing others.

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After watching this video, I had many reactions.  First, I think that this was the best speaker that I witnessed in this class.  The speaker did a great job at developing her ethos because she gave statistics and data and talked about her background.  I liked the way the speaker talked about love from a scientific standpoint rather than from experience.  A lot of the speakers in this class talked about love from experience.  While talking about love from experience is beneficial, science is a much more stronger foundation.  It makes sense that single people in America do not get married because they are afraid of divorce.  It is fair to say that I am also afraid of divorce.
From what you learned about dating and relationships, technology has definitely changed. Technology made it more accessible to find love, but people do not use it for love. Technology rather satisfies peoples sexual desires by looking at naked pictures, sexting, and arranging random hookups.

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I really enjoyed this video. I learned a bit more about love has changed a lot over the years. We can see how many people now are using dating apps to find a date. I don't think technology really change the aspect of love. If you find someone you really love on a dating app, then that is totally find.

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I really liked the Ted Talk. I think this was my favorite in this entire course. I think technology has not necessarily changed, "love," but it definitely has changed expectations on what love may be and relationships/hook ups/etc. What one person perceives as a loving gesture may vary for another and we have so many opportunities to do that online and with social media and instant communication. I think that's why, "boundaries," and, "standards," has become such a popular topic amongst college students and daters.

I think technology has changed the way we perceive interaction and relationship. I think it has increased our expectations. With so many distractions and ways of communicating, you would think it would be easier to satisfy your relationship. When in reality, I think all of these factors actually complicate it more.

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I really liked the video because it was really informative and educational, and it really gave me a different perspective on many things. When watching the video, I definitely agreed with Helen when she emphasized on how much technology does not affect relationships. I assumed and always believed it was difficult for our generation to pursue any relationship because of technology. But after watch this ted talk I have gained the new perspective that it was because of the unlimited options that are available for us now, as we are able to build relationships and make connections with people from different parts of the world.

When it comes to the history of dating, specific aspects from dating/marriages that I believed has changed because of technology is our perspective on relationships. It has allowed us to be open minded when meetings people, as well as it has created and formulated a different and unique way to communicate with them as well. All in all, it has allowed us to build relationships with people more easily because of how accessible technology is today. But even so, it has not changed the aspect of love because at the end of the day love is love and that can never be changed.

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I really enjoyed this video, especially due to how surprising I found it to be. I have  assumed a negative impact on technology in relation to dating for a while, as it seems harder to truly connect with people. There lacked an intimacy. However, as talked about in the video, the new tech can make it easier to meet and engage with new  people, who at the end of the day, are also harboring that primal urge for love. Even still, just as it has in every day life and activities, there has been developments in dating because of technology, it's just a matter of the the end result, of still being able and wanting to find and love someone that is unchanged.

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I thought it was very easy to follow and interesting. I think from now on there will always be a link between social media and love when it comes to teens and young adults. Dating apps make it a lot easier but just because it is easier does not mean it is always better

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My initial reaction to this video was that I enjoyed what the speaker had to say from love to technology. There was a lot of information that I didn't know before. I do not think technology has changed any aspects of dating and marriage. Online dating is a good thing for people to do if they like it, why not.

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Instantly, I agreed with Helen. I also never believed that technology changes the way love works. I always hear criticisms from older adults that technology has ruined love for the current generation. Also that technology keeps us from being able to form genuine and deep connections since we don’t talk face to face as much. This video did a great job explaining why technology if anything is good for relationships. From what we learned about the history of dating, technology just gives us more ways to make connections and talk to each other. Specifically for dating and marriage, technology allows us to reach out and meet people we wouldn't be able to.

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As assigned in your syllabus: Read: Bogle, K. A. (2008). Hooking up Chapters 3, 4, 5 and 6

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Watch this and comment below on something that resonated with you.

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Christina Wallace: How to stop swiping and find your person on dating apps

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Let's face it, online dating can suck. So many potential people, so much time wasted -- is it even worth it? Podcaster and entrepreneur Christina Wallace thinks so, if you do it right. In a funny, practical talk, Wallace shares how she used her MBA skill set to invent a "zero date" approach and get off swipe-based apps -- and how you can, too.

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Listen to the podcast below. In the comment section, 1. write your initial reaction 2. write the differences you see between this video and what life is actually like. 3. what are the differences and/or similarities between this and a specific time period addressed in "Labor of Love."

Comment on at least two classmate's posts.

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subscribe to Hidden Brain podcast

Few topics send the media into a panic like the idea of hookup culture on college campuses. But are college students actually having more sex than their parents did a generation ago? Research suggests the answer is no.

Lisa Wade, a sociologist at Occidental College, says something has changed, though: In today's hookup culture, developing an emotional attachment to a casual sex partner is one of the biggest breaches of social norms.

For her new book, American Hookup: The New Culture of Sex on Campus, Wade spent 5 years investigating hookup culture on American colleges and universities. In this culture, she says, there's a dichotomy between meaningless and meaningful sex, and students have to go out of their way to "perform meaninglessness." They have to prove that they're not emotionally attached to their sex partners, and in fact that they care less than the other person.

This leads to seemingly contradictory situations, such as people who only have sex with partners they're not interested in, and friends being meaner to each other after developing a sexual relationship.

This Valentine's Day, Lisa Wade talks with us about hookup culture and investigates the complex social rules surrounding casual sex on American college campuses.
Hidden Brain is hosted by Shankar Vedantam and produced by Maggie Penman, Jennifer Schmidt, Rhaina Cohen, and Renee Klahr. Our intern is Chloe Connelly, and our supervising producer is Tara Boyle. You can also follow us on Twitter @hiddenbrain, and listen for Hidden Brain stories each week on your local public radio station.

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Hookup Culture: The Unspoken Rules Of Sex On College Campuses

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subscribe to Hidden Brain podcast Few topics send the media into a panic like the idea of hookup culture on college campuses. But are college students actually having more sex than their parents did a generation ago? Research suggests the answer is no.

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After completing the reading, watch the video below. In a short essay (3-4 paragraphs, headings, etc) do the following:

Summarize and the main points of both the video and the reading. Follow up with a compare and contrast.

Think about how what you knew and felt about casual sex and double standards before reading/viewing this material? What did you already know? Which aspects changed?

In your experience with your friends, family, and acquaintances, how accurate are these? Explain.

*You do not need to comment on your classmates' posts but you do need to read them.

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Terri Conley: We need to rethink casual sex

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Social psychologist and sex researcher Terri Conley thinks it's high time we stop feeling guilty about enjoying casual sex-no matter what society says. In this entertaining talk, Conley interrogates three common myths about sexuality and gender and suggests a few new, guilt-free ways to think about our sex lives.

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The content this week speaks a lot about "double standards" with regard to dating, sex, and expectations. Explain a specific example in which you have seen this play out- personally, on film/television/books, or in others.

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Nothing I never saw it coming, technology is meant to make thing faster and easier for people, but in relationships, if you're able to get in a relationship fast and easy, most people won't take it seriously, or appreciate the opportunity.

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This video was very enjoyable. It brought up topics that were seemingly interesting. The initial fact about a man having several wives and wanting none was hilarious to me. For many people and generations today, dating has definitely been a game changer for technology. People used to have to go out and meet new people since their were no means of communication. Today, you begin by meeting someone online and begin chatting through their. Most people have found their significant other that way.

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The 0 date stuck with me from the video. This could be a good method to practice when online dating. Today, so many people continue to frown upon online dating and are also very afraid to explore online dating. If you know exactly how to manage and what you want, you are definitely in control of your online dating life.

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In this week’s padlet, we were assigned different Ted Talks as well as reading chapters in our book, Hooking Up: Sex, Dating, and Relationships on Campus. In the book, sex on campus was discussed in the chapters. Kathleen Bogle, the author, interviewed multiple students in different colleges, regarding their opinions on sex in college. Most college students agreed that in their freshman year, they wanted to use that time for the true “college experience”: partying and hooking up with different people. After freshman year, most women decided to try to settle down and find a long-term boyfriend; however, most men in college would rather keep hooking up with different girls. Additionally, women were more likely to want something more from a hookup, which is the main thing that guys wanted to avoid. In the Ted Talk, speaker Terri Conley debunked different myths about casual sex and informed the audience that casual sex is normal and that it should not be looked down upon. The reading and video are similar because they both discuss different aspects of sex and relationships regarding sex. However, the reading differs from the Ted Talk because in the book, Bogle is trying to understand more about the student’s actions, while Conley is informing her audience of the new normal.

While I was viewing this material, I already knew most of the information about casual sex and also about double standards. For example, I knew that most girls wanted a relationship from a hook up because they end up developing feelings for the guy they were with. I also knew that guys were the ones who engaged in more hook ups because they were not ready to have a relationship and wanted to wait until they were out of college. I think that most people today know about the double standard because it is much more common for more people to assume these standards today, no matter what the person does. I enjoyed the Ted Talk because many interesting points were made: for example, the comparison of a car crash to teenagers having sex. It is true that more adolescents can get into car accidents due to reckless driving and there parents should worry more about their driving rather than something that is a natural feeling and many people do. Additionally, Conley also stated that there are many different ways to protect yourselves during sex, and that it should be normalized as it is something that has been common in the world for years.

In my experience, I think that these points are very common. For example, I witnessed the double standard first hand in high school because of how students would break up and continue on with another person and be seen as a “slut” or “cheater” or “hoe”. Today, I hear from my friends about how they would like to just sleep with someone for one night and not expect anything from it for the sole reason they do not want to be in a relationship, but they still want to engage in casual sex. Overall, in my life, I see the double standard being used and I witness people wanting to engage in casual sex because they do not have the desire of being in a relationship.

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The chapters from the book discusses campus sex. Bogle interviewed students from different universities to understand their views on college sex life. Most college students agree that during their freshman year, they want to use this time to experience college, hook up and socialize with different people. After the freshman year, most women are looking for long-term relationships, but most college men are the opposite. In Ted Talk, Conley told the audience that casual sex is normal and should not be underestimated. The reading material and the video are similar because they both discuss different aspects of sex and the relationship related to sex. But Bogle tried to learn more about student behavior, and Conley introduced people's new normal to her audience.
I knew that the concept of sex from contemporary college students is not much different from that of their parents when they were in school. In terms of sexual behaviors contemporary college students are not more open than early college students, the differences is contemporary college students accepts same-sex sexual behavior a lot better than their parents. I also knew that contemporary college students are more likely to have sex with friends or accidentally acquainted people, and the claims that their hook ups are spouses or regular sexual partners have decreased. Contemporary college students get married much later than in the past. Now they rarely use terms such as dating and determining relationships, and they no longer feel that the person hooked up with on campus must be their future marriage partner. The double standards of sex, I knew the requirements for men are not the same as those for women. They usually restrict women very strictly, while men are more free and indulgent. This is an objective fact and a manifestation of the inequality between men and women in a male-centered society. I think is unreasonable, and it can and should be changed. In terms of sexual behavior and social interaction, women should enjoy the same rights as men.
A lot of what I learned did apply to some of my experiences. For example, a friend of mine broke up with her boyfriend and got together with another guy a few days later. After that, I started to hear people’s negative comments about her and some of them didn’t even know her that well. Just based on the fact that she was unfaithful to the last relationship in which it had died. Her ex-boyfriend also found a new girlfriend, but he didn’t get the same treatment as my friend. People were happy for him. That’s why I think double standards should stop being so harsh on women, and give everyone the same treatment.

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Virginia lewis I thought the video was good. The speaker gave great information. Social media has changed the way be date and start relationship.

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I've never been fan of online dating. Everything the speaker listed about the cons of online dating I agree. In my experience guys were just looking for someone to hook-up with. Other guys were just creating a fantasy of them that was far from the truth. i know people you had success with online dating and had long lasting relationships. I just don't feel real connections.

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I was initially shocked listening to this. I know most college kids use their freedom from home to wild out But, I guess to her this I was shocked. I just couldn't image going to a party and hooking up with anyone even in younger days. I think now women our comfortable in their sexuality and men cant make them do anything or have much control over them. I believe back in the day men felt powerful and felt they had the upper name in forcing women to do what they were comfortable doing.

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There are a lot of double standards. Men can sleep round and be consider the man or cool. If a women does she is label fast or a whore. Its always been what's good for men to do is wrong or un-lady like for women. I use to smoke cigarettes'. and this guy came up to me and said it was unattractive for me to be smoking all while he was smoking one also.

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I found this video interesting to say the least. Bringing out another speaker to question the original speaker was something I had never seen on a Ted talk so that definitely kept me interested. I think this Ted talk aligns closely with the first reading from iGen, in terms of how technology has impacted dating. Technology impacts dating mostly by the way we meet people. I really liked when the speaker said that dating websites are actually introduction websites because that really is what it boils down to. I also agreed with her comments on how our generation is far more focused on being good parents rather than being focused on our partners.

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I LOVE the idea of a zero date. Not only have I been on too many bad first dinner dates but I also work at a restaurant. It is incredibly easy to see who is on a first date, and even easier to see who is on a bad first dinner date. It is true, you can tell if you want to have dinner with someone within about thirty seconds of meeting. When you go on a dinner date, it is expected you will have an appetizer, and entree, and dessert. The zero date avoids all of that. I am genuinly going to start utilizing this.

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I always believed my generation was a lot more sexually active than before but turns out that it is the complete opposite. Looking at the statistics now definitely makes sense. I was a bit shocked to hear this. Hookup culture was also nonexistent during the time period back then. People and their beliefs have changed today proving that women are now more free and able to speak for themselves.

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Double standards are also seen in expectations where the male is the bread winner of the relationship and the woman has to do the house work so that the man does not have to move a single finger.

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Through out the week, we have been exploring the different aspects of dating and sexual relationships and hooking up. The ted talk discussed specific myths that were common for sex. The reading discussed what sex is like while on campus and different student perspectives.
I already knew that everyone believes that sex is bad and unhealthy and the Ted Talk did well explaining that. My thoughts about casual sex were between two people who had feelings. The rules specified all throughout not just the reading and this ted talk explained how others had meaningless casual sex.
Personally, I would not be having sex with someone I do not know even if it is just for fun and meaningless. To me it would be a waste of time. It is interesting to learn about how people's ideas are all different and the research behind the Ted Talk and the reading.

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My initial reaction to the video is that it is very relevant in todays society as it is very easy for people to meet other people now. This is what I feel what pushes people to form connections with multiple people now and experience new things and people because before people were more restricted and had fewer opportunities to make a connection with the select people in their life/area.

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In this video, I was able to relate to how she said online dating isn't about just dating but finding your person and the person you just connect with. I liked how she said the hour date idea, I think that is very true how you can tell if you like someone within that time frame and determine if you would like to see them again.

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This weeks reading was about he chapters from the book which discusses campus sex. Students from multiple universities were interviewed to get their perspectives on college sex. College students said that they would prefer to use their early years to socialize and have fun then after around their second or third year, they look for something a little more long term. In the video, Conely talks about causal sex and how it affects females and other peoples perspectives of them if they were to behave as a man in that sense. The video and reading are similar because they both discuss intercourse and different relationships that come with it. My perspective on causal sex is just not for me. For other people who indulge in that, there is nothing wrong it, however the way I was raised and taught to believe, that's not the kind of relationship I want to have. I am the kind of person who wants to be in a relationship or something along those lines before anything sexual is a thought. I think there is a double standard for girls being sexually active as that is part of the reason I feel strongly about being committed to someone first. For a lot of females who have had a lot of different partners, have a huge chance to be looked down or judged. For some of my friends, who have had multiple partners, they have faced criticism. My best friend was talked about and called a "crazy slut" after her ex boyfriend told everyone she was crazy and that she was 'dirty'. He spread false rumors and for a long time people believed them. Another incident that had happened was actually to me. This guy and I had been talking for a little bit and then out of nowhere ghosted me. I later found out he told all his friends he took my viriginity and had sex numerous time. Even though this kid never once put a hand on me or made a move, he still told people lies about leaving people to think that I was 'that kind of girl' as people say. That 'kind of girl' was talked about and played, and this happens all the time.

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I was very surprised hearing this as it said that people more want to have sex with someone they do not feel a connection with versus having a connection with someone and not being intimate. This is surprising to know the different view points of other people, as some of this does resonate. For instance having drunk meaningless hookups versus sober hookups. More people do not take sex serious and will play it off as nothing if they are under the influence. I think that relationships and men back then varied, as some were loyal to their wives whereas other had 'mistresses'. This relates to now as the few people that can be in a monogamous relationship and others who want to have one person to go home to but numerous amounts of partners.

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An example that relates to double standards is for a girl who is a virgin and wants to wait to be in a relationship one term before that happens, but the guy she is dating/talking to is not used to waiting and is satisfied with the wait, however he expects her to be okay with him needing time to be in an established committed relationship. This boy needs time to feel comfortable with asking her to be his girlfriend but he tells her he loves her. This girl however wants to wait to lose her viriginity to someone she has been with for a long time. Both are struggling to accept one another's wishes and do not know what to do. This is still playing out but the guy has been talking to the girl making her feel young and naive for wanting to wait. This very much holds a double standard and is a messy situation.

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I can kinda understand why people would prefer to hook up with Randoms they're attracted to but don't have any connections to, because in that case, both sides are just going for the sex, there's zero responsibilities comes after, and that's what people our generation are avoiding, we just want the experience. But when both man and woman are doing the same things, they're going around partying and hooking up with people, the girls are always catching some of the negative stereotypes, it's like people always have something against girls that doesn't protect about their body from men.

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This weeks reading and the video above both focus on casual sex, whther on campus or in day to day lives. Both highlughted the stigmas following sex, and tried to show why the stigmas existed and why they were not necesarily correct. Bogle discussed sex in connection to just college campuses and college students, while

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This weeks reading and the above Ted Talk both highlighted the concept of casual sex, and sex in general. Bogle focuses more on sex in college, on campus and between students, while Connely focused more on sex in general. Both women discussed the stigmas and sterotypes revolving around sex and tried to debunk them for their audiences.
As a college student, I have never llived on campus and this is my first year at an actual university, rather than my local community college. I have never had the real college experience, and still have not due to the pandmeic, but I still had a good understanding of the community Bogle wrote about. As a twenty-something, I have heard the word “hook-up” thrown around more times than I can count, yet, like Bogle, I still do not know what the word means. I think her using different people’s persepctives to define the word throughout the chapter is very educational. The word is so fluid and has so many different definitions that reading all the different definitions does give a better understanding of it. There is no bad connotation in my generation revolving around the term hook-up because no one really knows what it means to another person, unless you ask that specific person. I could tell one person I’ve hooked up with 25 people (made up number) and they would not bat an eye because they might think I just meant kissing, while another person could crucify me for it because they think I mean I had sexual intercourse with 25 different people. The point Bogle was making by showing all the different definitions is so important in this day and age.
While Bogle was focused solely on college students, Connely went for a broader research group. Connelly went in depth on all sorts of different demographics, including age, far more than Bogle did. The focus on the STIs that Connelly had was not something that Bogle focused on. I am also taking a summer course on HIV and AIDS epidemic, so this topic really resonated wit me. She made such good points in the way people percieve casual sex solely on STIs. The comparison between the DMV website and the Public Health website really stood out to me. I would much rather never get in a car again, than never have sex, solely based on the risk factor of the two actions. People are so afraid of STIs, even the treatable ones, that they villify sex, rather than any other aspect. I also enjoyed the comment about how monoganous people are better dog walkers, it really does show the absurdity of the casual sex argument.
I was raised in school and at home to believe casual sex was not something I should particpate in, that it was immoral. The truth is, it is not immoral and it can be very safe. This is not an argument of “well everyone is doing it so I should too” because Bogle showed that was not true. People do not always follow that saying and sometimes go against that. Having sex will not kill you, as shown by Connelly. Sex can be beneficial and people enjoy it! It is time to let go of the stigma surrounding casual, safe sex and let people do what they want.